RE: A Housecat's Message (Full Version)

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parttimehotty -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 9:43:27 AM)

Sssssh, puhleeeeze don't make her cry again! She's going to BEAT MY A$$ when I go to Florida!  Or maybe drown me at the waterpark![sm=shame.gif]

**Wait, you'd LIKE that, wouldn't you, Holl-parts**




sirsholly -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 9:57:00 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: parttimehotty

Sssssh, puhleeeeze don't make her cry again! She's going to BEAT MY A$$ when I go to Florida!  Or maybe drown me at the waterpark![sm=shame.gif]

**Wait, you'd LIKE that, wouldn't you, Holl-parts**


not the drowning part...




parttimehotty -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 9:58:10 AM)

What?  Why not drowning? Hmmm? 




sirsholly -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 9:59:16 AM)

too messy...you bloat when you float




parttimehotty -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:00:19 AM)

Sing to the tune of (How low can you, how low can you go)
You bloat when you float
You bloat when you float
You bloat when you float




sirsholly -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:01:53 AM)

*sigh*
on second thought...Greedy...hold her under till the bubblies stop.




parttimehotty -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:06:58 AM)

Fart bubbles, right?[sm=yahoo.gif]




sirsholly -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:08:35 AM)

those too




parttimehotty -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:10:01 AM)

Hope the bewbies don't fall out of the bathing suit![sm=flash.gif]




purepleasure -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:12:00 AM)

*perk*

potsie's bewbies fell out?  where?!!!!




sirsholly -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:14:06 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: parttimehotty

Hope the bewbies don't fall out of the bathing suit![sm=flash.gif]


mine do it all the time. The Kleenex turns to mush and floats away......




parttimehotty -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:15:07 AM)

Damn..........beat me to it!!




sirsholly -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:16:42 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: parttimehotty

Damn..........beat me to it!!


go me!!!!




parttimehotty -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:17:06 AM)

Yes, pleeease just go!




sirsholly -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:19:00 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: parttimehotty

Yes, pleeease just go!


*sob* [:(]




Emperor1956 -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:22:45 AM)

I ran this past Nyanske (an apple head sealpoint siamese) and Nikki (a gorgeous Chartreux) and here is the reply I found typed on my computer this morning:

Dear pathetic human:

We do not know which of your kinky online friends is posting this drivel about "a housecat's message" but she got it all wrong (and, as an aside, when you and your silly sex friends come over and play, you ALWAYS stop ME from doing the fun stuff -- scratching and twisting the rope, running my claws over the latex, and pouncing and scratching any human bits that dangle or stick out.  You want pain, bucko...just TRY ME).  But we digress.

There are only two thoughts in the entire cat language which are expressed to your lower species.  They are:

1.   WHEN DO WE EAT?
2.   EVERYTHING HERE IS MINE.

Anything else is simply felinepromorphism.   Get it straight.   And remember, the minute one of my kind develops opposible thumbs or some other way to open a can, your kind is toast.

Hell, if I could teach the dumb dog to open cans, you'd be gone already.

Fondly,  Nyan and Nik




sirsholly -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:25:58 AM)

lmao!!!!!!!




servantheart -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:51:48 AM)

http://youtube.com/watch?v=GdYOmG98YTc
 
 




phoenixinchains -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 10:53:47 AM)

>^..^< purr




thornhappy -> RE: A Housecat's Message (5/29/2008 2:07:37 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: parttimehotty

 When I crinkle my eyes clised, I am smiling at you. A brush against your shin is a hub, a message that sys, "I love you and want you to smell like me."
   Please know that I adore a long stroke down my back, but stop before my tail, as that is my rudder and its momentary confinement panics me.
   Know also that I love a good scratch around the ears, but detest my feet explored. Balance is life or death to a cat and my feet are as important to me as breathing.
   Feel free to tickle my chin, but be gentle and do not break my wiskers; for me they are important tools.
   If I trust you utterly, you will be allowed to stroke my belly.
   Though I can communicate silently with others of my kind. I vocalize for you. I will meow, hiss, yap for dinner and chirr my curiosity. I know a single brrppp makes you laugh and slop me with a kiss.
   I will tippy-toe when I'm trying to be cute. And when I sit with my back turned and with only one ear honed in your direction, I am not ignoring you, by any means; I am being coy. I love to perch, burrow, strut and stalk.
   When I jump on the bed to be with you in the dark, it is not because I need to sleep. In most cases, I have been sleeping all day. I am there because of your warmth, your companionship and to share the air you breathe.
   I know when you are melancholy, and I will stray nearby if you are in pain, but I don't understand the necessity of vacuuming.
   There was a time when I loved the 'other feline' in the house and have mourned his loss with a grief unmatched.
   I am always listening.

   I watch you shave or apply make-up out of a true fascination with all things requiring attention to detail.
   Know that I am clean and dignified, even when I am belly-up on the windowsill in the sunshine. I can feel sheepish about my antics when you expose me to catnip, but I look forward to it anyway.
   I crave peace.
   My three favorite things are: mice in the walls, your voice on my neck and the can opener.
   I can slink and sidle, soothe and steal and make myself scarce.
   Know that I find you noisy, sadly fur-less and strangely excitable about a single hairball, but I forgive you out of grand benevolence. I love it when you wrap gifts or read the newspaper. I understand the aching sweetness of a spring rainstorm...and a good cry.
   Know that I will purr when I am hurt or frightened, as well as when I am content.
   No, I don't clean my plate. It is instinct to leave a cache--just in case.
   Contrary to popular belief, I don't mind the vet because of the way it smells, the other animals, the inevitable pain or the travel. Rather, I hate to go there in case you leave me.
   So, even when I stare into the corner late at night and spook you half to death, or I stroll casually over your computer keyboard, or even when I appear to barely be impressed by your rantings about work or school, know that I am a seperate nation from you with all my borders open.
   I reserve the right to certain terms and conditions, but my spirit would be inconsolable without you.
   Live beside me.

By Theresa Malizia, http://www.scrapbook.com/blogs/145009/view/70225.html except for the last line.

thornhappy




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