quote:

ORIGINAL: MissMagnolia

MsMillgrove, delete and block are your best friends. Make good use of them!! The buttons are right there at the bottom of the email box. Anyone rude, repeat emailers, those who won't take no for an answer, etc., just block and delete and they will never bug you again. If they send a laundry list of "I want ya to use a strap on on me Miss" type emails, you can either respond and let them have it with both barrels, OR save yourself the aggravation and delete and block.

quote:

ORIGINAL: burningdesires47

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissMagnolia

MsMillgrove, delete and block are your best friends. Make good use of them!! The buttons are right there at the bottom of the email box. Anyone rude, repeat emailers, those who won't take no for an answer, etc., just block and delete and they will never bug you again. If they send a laundry list of "I want ya to use a strap on on me Miss" type emails, you can either respond and let them have it with both barrels, OR save yourself the aggravation and delete and block.

Personally, I prefer NOT to delete, at least not without writing a comment (usually just copy-pasting the offensive email) in the comments section of their profile. That way if they write again I can clearly remember why I rejected them before.

Also, and I'm not the only one to complain about this, but I hit block, and I still get emails from people I've blocked. Sometimes it still even lists them as blocked!! (as in the button at the bottom of the NEW since I blocked them email says "Unblock user.") Reeeeal helpful people! Sooo frustrating.

I got a Shakespearean insults book for my birthday a few years ago. I think I will dig it out and start using it on all the annoying freakazoids who can't take no for an answer. Problem is, despite my profile contents, I get a lot of subbie boys who WANT me to abuse them... and sending them insults only gets them hotter and makes them think I'm into them but playing hard to get or something.

quote:

ORIGINAL: stella41b

Okay, I'm going to come in here...and try and offer some constructive advice.

STEP ONE - REVISE YOUR PROFILE.

It's mundane, boring, it says nothing. It's about as interesting as that gunk Americans call porridge, 'grits'? Something deep inside me is hoping that you are actually called Richard or Rick.

Who are you? What do you do all day? What are you into? What are your interests? Are you a student? Good job? What are your dreams in life? Ambitions? What makes you different from all the thousands of other male subs out there?

It's a big enough box, can fit lots of writing, there's also another box for journal entries. It's like a garden, a shop window, and when you're looking for a Domme, and because it's a profile, it's got to look attractive, just like a store window. Otherwise they won't buy and won't ask. Use your noggin, a bit of psychology.

Oh and another thing, what can YOU bring to a relationship? Are you a service sub? A play sub? Any experience? This is just a part of a profile.

I once spent 10 days thnking about and designing my profile. Didn't get me anywhere, didn't find anyone, but it turned out to be a basis. Go browse the profiles of other male subs, get some ideas, inspiration, try and find a pattern you like and start there.

Go away and think, write about anything but try for a bit of everything, a sort of blend, BDSM, vanilla, basic info, interests, give clues as to who you are, an honest, accurate, comprehensive online profile of you as you are in reality. It inspires confidnece, builds trust, makes you realistic, lifelike, human.

Make your profile do all the work. That's what it's there for. Just like the big shop windows at Nordstroms. Advertising. Put yourself on display (but please don't take this too literally - some people here have overactive imaginations as it is without any encouragement).

STEP TWO - ADD PHOTOS

Many Dommes like to know who they're writing to, they want to be able to put a face to a name. Doesn't have to be clever, just natural, honest.. recent. A picture of you at home? Doing something? Try to avoid passport photo type shots, mugshots, this isn't the NYPD website or 'America's Most Wanted'.

STEP THREE - BROWSE PROFILES

Yes it's hunting season, and we're about to go hunting Dommes. But what is a Domme? A woman of course, and a woman? A human, as individual as you are, as I am, as anyone else is. READ THE PROFILE. All of it. Is she available? Who is she looking for? What is she looking for? How does this compare to you? Worth a try?

STUDY THE PROFILE - all of it, journal entries, Message Board postings, everything, including those interests. Can you handle her interests? All of them? No point in messaging a Domme who has got canes and crops in 'lives for' with (expert) if you're not into pain, is there? How do your interests dovetail her's? See any compatibility?

STEP FOUR - THINK!!!!!!

May seem like stating the obvious, but not if you were to see the contents of my Inbox.

I want a Domme for the rest of my life.. How romantic. Truly. Not very realistic. I want a Domme. Closer. Female companionship? Much warmer. Female friendship? Getting hot. A response from a Domme? Yes.

Okay, this is the strategy... She's Domme, you're sub.. Forget about your interests, forget about BDSM, forget about kink, forget about what you want.. forget about everything and anything else other than... stimulating her interest in you.

Always leave an opportunity for her to take the initiative, always. Be yourself, don't grovel, don't mewl, don't crawl, don't assume any sort of submissive stance or position until she tells you to, okay? Just be yourself, be honest, read her words, listen to her if she ever calls you, understand.. follow her lead.

This is the strategy. It's not guaranteed.. Most times it probably won't work, but every once in a while it will.

STEP FIVE - WRITE THE MESSAGE.

Please... no life stories, no autobiographies, just a brief introduction, a comment on her profile, and a couple of questions about her. Questions that she can easily answer without really thinking. carefully considered questions.

This should be enough to get past the bottom feeders, the trolls, the Nigerian princes, the male Doms who want her to submit, the functional illiterates, the ones who didn't take geography in high school, the genuine 'hi how r u' illierates, and the spam.

Write to her as you would your sister, mother, as yourself but to someone who you've thought about a bit. keep your expectations low.

STEP SIX - ONE AT A TIME.

Please don't send 50 messages to 50 Dommes, or worse, one message to 50 Dommes, or 10. Three might be interested. Then what? Basically, you're screwed, trust me.

STEP SEVEN - BECOME ONE OF US.

Yes, become a poster. Take an active interest in the forums and Message Boards. Learn, share, ask, advise, you'd be surprised how many people read threads. It passes the time. It's good entertainment.

STEP EIGHT - DON'T GIVE UP.

Make friends.. online, offline, never give up hoping. There's a lot of truly wonderful people out there, here on this site, many of them are Dommes, but this is just a part of them, for they are really fascinating women and wonderful human beings. Hundreds of truly special people out there.

Just like you. You just need to believe in yourself, and put it all down on your profile. It's that simple.

PS. You are really called Richard aren't you? I'm still 50/50 about your nick, but it's growing on me. (Please - to those with the very fertile imaginations - don't).

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn
I've had a few women over the time I've been on collarme who I think hate me because they sent me a message once, and I just didn't feel comfortable responding (sometimes people take a little too many liberties with believing dominant means they're YOUR dominant).

quote:

ORIGINAL: Puppy4goodHome

I find that some not just Mistress but Also Masters Tops Bottoms Submissive and SLAVES
well we all get a bunch who horas us and email us when we say where are not looking for a boy or a girl or no men no tops no other bottoms well when one sees a email from one of the ones they are not interested in it could be filtered out or they just delete it because they are not going to talk to you just because they think that they know exactly what we want some it is amazing how when you do get a response they don't Even appear to have read your email they just say no LOL

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ORIGINAL: MistressSybella

quote:

ORIGINAL: Puppy4goodHome

I find that some not just Mistress but Also Masters Tops Bottoms Submissive and SLAVES
well we all get a bunch who horas us and email us when we say where are not looking for a boy or a girl or no men no tops no other bottoms well when one sees a email from one of the ones they are not interested in it could be filtered out or they just delete it because they are not going to talk to you just because they think that they know exactly what we want some it is amazing how when you do get a response they don't Even appear to have read your email they just say no LOL

OMG! Was that all ONE sentence? LOL! puppy, honey, you're scaring me! LOL!

Miss 'Bella
ServeMeWell

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn

No, generally it's when someone initiates communication and treats me generically. An example is a recent one who contacted me out of the blue who wrote only: "Why should I be interested in you as my slave?" How do you respond to that without being rude or sounding desperate? So, I just ignored her and moved on.