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RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 11:57:40 AM

MissLaura1973

Posts: 161
Joined: 11/11/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
I'm not asking you particularly, LP, because I know that hetero males sucking cock is of only minute and passing interest to you . . . but what, exactly, is at the root of the fun (some) women get in seeing this?

For me, there's a couple of things that make this kind of scenario appealing ...
- As the dominant, I get off on the fact that the slave is trusting of me and wants so badly to please me that they are willing to do something that, while not harmful, is really pushing some limits for them - I like that power / control aspect.
- I find the visual stimulation of two men together to be just plain arousing (the more "straight" appearing the better) - I don't know if it's because we simply don't get to see a lot of men being intimate together in this society, or something else (two other comments here - first, I do not, as a rule, get turned-on by viewing sexual stuff and second, I do love watching leathermen play).
- I like the tension that happens in the room as the interaction begins - the apprehension and the trepidation in addition to the sexual energy.
- There's something incredibly mouth-watering to watch the two men start to interact and to see the struggle within them as they start to feel aroused by the sensations and the situation and yet they're still fighting against some societal taboos. But then, gradually, the arousal and desire begins to take over and they start to let go and just enjoy what's happening.

Just some thoughts.

(in reply to PeonForHer)

Post #: 621

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 12:23:51 PM

PeonForHer

Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
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. . . to see the struggle within them . . .

Hah! I thought it was that. The struggle is essential.

. . . .Just some thoughts.

Is "thoughts' quite the correct word there, MissLaura? That seems quite a clinical word, considering the foregoing in your post. But: thank you for them.

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Post #: 622

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 12:33:05 PM

MissLaura1973

Posts: 161
Joined: 11/11/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
. . . .Just some thoughts.

Is "thoughts' quite the correct word there, MissLaura? That seems quite a clinical word, considering the foregoing in your post. But: thank you for them.

Hmmmm. Interesting thought. What word / concept would you suggest?

(in reply to PeonForHer)

Post #: 623

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 12:50:12 PM

PeonForHer

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Hmmmm. Interesting thought. What word / concept would you suggest?

I feel myself backing into a corner, MissLaura. "Thoughts" is a most excellent word and I find myself now perfectly happy for you to use it.

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Post #: 624

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 1:10:20 PM

MissLaura1973

Posts: 161
Joined: 11/11/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
Hmmmm. Interesting thought. What word / concept would you suggest?

I feel myself backing into a corner, MissLaura. "Thoughts" is a most excellent word and I find myself now perfectly happy for you to use it.

*laughing* Actually, it was an honest question, Peon - I wasn't too happy with my original word choice but also wasn't awake enough to come up with something more accurate, hence the question.

(in reply to PeonForHer)

Post #: 625

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 1:40:34 PM

samboct

Posts: 1817
Joined: 1/17/2007
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A few days ago, I finished reading this article entitled- What do women want? found here-http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/25/magazine/25desire-t.html

I had a couple of ah ha! moments reading the article.

A brief synopsis-

1) Men and women really are wired differently.
2) Men's little head and big head are in sync. Women's physical response (vaginal blood flow) and conscious thought are not.
3) Women are more fluid in their sexual orientation. Men are more rigid. This translates to no arousal when watching male/male sex by straight guys- and no arousal looking at women by gay men. Women can be aroused by a much wider variety of stimuli.

In terms of this thread- One of the things that strikes me upon a cursory reading (no, I haven't read the 30 plus pages, so if I'm rehashing old ground, I apologize) is that there's not much recognition of the differences between the sexes. In short, some women think asking a hetero male to suck cock shouldn't be that big a deal, because from her perspective, going down on another woman isn't so traumatic. This may be why for these women that watching this activity doesn't do a lot for them. For other women who have made this realization, hetero males playing together for her amusement is a terrific rush. (Sounds like Miss Laura and Lady Pact.) I suspect that the converse is true to a certain extent as well, i.e. men don't realize that women don't recognize the pressures that must be overcome. Sorry- I guess that last is a bit confusing. Maybe another way of saying it is that some women don't think it's such a big deal- but men don't realize that.

Sam

(in reply to MissLaura1973)

Post #: 626

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 2:07:03 PM

PeonForHer

Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
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Maybe another way of saying it is that some women don't think it's such a big deal- but men don't realize that.

I think that's almost certainly true, samboct. There's a strong current in this thread that has it that if a man were entirely heterosexual, he'd be repulsed by the thought of giving another man a BJ. That isn't true. I don't fantasise about it - but I'm not repulsed by it either. It just doesn't matter one way or another.

It really is possible to be like that. I just think: "how, exactly, is it going to hurt me?"

TBH, if I were ever in the situation of 'forced bi', I think the thing that might most get in my way would be the fact that I might not be able to stop laughing.

Most of these things, these days, I just don't care about.

< Message edited by PeonForHer -- 3/9/2009 2:23:32 PM >

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Post #: 627

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 2:12:37 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: samboct

A few days ago, I finished reading this article entitled- What do women want? found here-http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/25/magazine/25desire-t.html

I had a couple of ah ha! moments reading the article.

A brief synopsis-

1) Men and women really are wired differently.
2) Men's little head and big head are in sync. Women's physical response (vaginal blood flow) and conscious thought are not.
3) Women are more fluid in their sexual orientation. Men are more rigid. This translates to no arousal when watching male/male sex by straight guys- and no arousal looking at women by gay men. Women can be aroused by a much wider variety of stimuli.

In terms of this thread- One of the things that strikes me upon a cursory reading (no, I haven't read the 30 plus pages, so if I'm rehashing old ground, I apologize) is that there's not much recognition of the differences between the sexes. In short, some women think asking a hetero male to suck cock shouldn't be that big a deal, because from her perspective, going down on another woman isn't so traumatic. This may be why for these women that watching this activity doesn't do a lot for them. For other women who have made this realization, hetero males playing together for her amusement is a terrific rush. (Sounds like Miss Laura and Lady Pact.) I suspect that the converse is true to a certain extent as well, i.e. men don't realize that women don't recognize the pressures that must be overcome. Sorry- I guess that last is a bit confusing. Maybe another way of saying it is that some women don't think it's such a big deal- but men don't realize that.

Sam

Thank you for your contribution, Sam. If I may......

#1 Almost goes without saying.

#2 I have to wonder if this is linked in some way to conditioned behavior. Every mature male that I know was at one time that young male new to puberty that got erections at inopportune times. (High school science class, for example.) If something gets a woman wet other than direct stimuli, we don't have to hide it because in most cases, no one knows.

#3 This one I would argue. I would counter it with the fact that in some studies of how 'straight' men react to m/m porn, it tends to be the more homophobic, the more likely they are to become aroused. (I wish I could link you to the report. I'll have to ask My boy for it.)

As for the last part of your post, you would be right, at least in My case. Not being bi Myself (not even the slightest curious) part of the attraction can be the turn on of the inner turmoil. Mix that with part obedience, and part just plain hot to watch, you get yourself one heck of a cocktail.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to samboct)

Post #: 628

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 6:06:46 PM

samboct

Posts: 1817
Joined: 1/17/2007
Status: offline

Hi Peon

Well, having sucked on a plastic dildo at the command of the woman I was playing with, the thought of whether a real cock might be more enjoyable did cross my mind. Laughter? dunno-I often laugh when I'm really nervous about something.

Lady Pact

I actually don't think #1 goes without saying. Most people extrapolate from their own thoughts, experiences and perceptions, and there's often a strain of "fairness" that runs through this forum implying that men and women are equal. Well, they are legally, but in the bedroom we're different and different generally isn't equal. My assumption is that the realization that men and women are wired differently doesn't penetrate very far, which is why you often get battles on these threads where it seems people are talking past each other. From my own experience- it's not easy for me to understand what makes a woman tick (I think most men would agree with this)- but I get men pretty easily. From reading that article- one of the eureka moments was realizing that extrapolating what I'd do in a situation is probably a poor substitute for trying to figure out how someone with a different value system might react.
#2) Most men aren't that embarassed by an erection. We're more worried about appearing like a dork, saying the wrong thing, thinking a girl likes us when she doesn't....I don't remember a time when a guy told me- I was really interested in this hot chick, but I popped a boner and it turned her off. I think that our dicks and our heads are in sync makes men easy to figure out. Generally women seem to have men figured out too- it's the converse that's a challenge.
#3) In terms of women being more fluid-one of the points of the article looked at long term and highly public romances involving Melissa Etheridge and Anne Heche. Melissa's long time female lover married a man, and Anne Heche did the same thing. I suspect a bit more digging would show similar examples. But I'd be hard pressed to name an openly gay man getting married to a woman. If it happens, my money's on it being a lot less common.

I'm making the assumption that the people in the studies were comfortable enough to accurately identify their own sexual preferences. You're quite correct that the most homophobic men are generally the ones who are "closet cases"- and this can show up as lots of aggression.

Sam

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 629

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 6:43:16 PM

gauguin

Posts: 28
Joined: 7/27/2008
From: UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

. . . to see the struggle within them . . .

Hah! I thought it was that. The struggle is essential.

There is not much struggle when you accept your role of submissive "thing", ;-)

At least for me it works like that. Submitting to Master or taking bottom role in "forced bi" with other male sub makes me feel a bit dehumanised. Sucking cock or receiving anal requires surrendering my sexuality.

(in reply to PeonForHer)

Post #: 630

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 9:03:38 PM

domn8trx

Posts: 2
Joined: 1/27/2009
Status: offline

I am considerably new to this site and in reading some forums, I found this one and thought I would throw My 2cents into the ring. I have ordered subs to suck another guys's cock quite a few times and twice ordered penetration. they were both straight. it was not an issue of being straight or bi, or even curious, but a matter of total submission. they knew that it was their place to do as they were told unconditionally and that it would please Me for them to do so. for Me, it is a matter of total control and a mind f**k. it is degrading, humiliating and pushes perhaps one of their hard limits. I truly believe that your orientation is based on attraction. I am totally straight and not attracted to women. it is the same for men. to the person who mentioned this being along the same lines as forced-bi.....I fully agree! they are being forced into bi-play that they would never do on their own volition. and I find it extremely HOT!!! lol

here is something along this line to consider which I do not believe was addressed thus far. if a man enjoys anal play, specifically strap-on play, does that effect his sexual orientation??? My answer is no because it is a sensation and not an attraction issue. mentally, they know there is a woman on the other end.

someone brought up the subject of hipocracy between men and women being able to express their orientation. I feel that it is a real shame that men cannot be honest about their interests without fear of ridicule. why is it perfectly acceptable for a woman to admit she is bi and not so for a man? the funny thing with Me is that I am quite often hit on by women and have to find a polite way to back out of the situation. sometimes I am taken by suprise at a party and groped or kissed or more. they seem shocked when I tell them that I am straight. men, and women, assume that because I am a female in the lifestyle I must be bi. when a man says that because I am a single female in the lifestyle I must be bi, I turn that around and ask him if he is bi because he is a single man in the lifestyle so he must be bi. he laughs and changes the subject. haha

(in reply to gauguin)

Post #: 631

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 9:30:56 PM

domn8trx

Posts: 2
Joined: 1/27/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissLaura1973

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
I'm not asking you particularly, LP, because I know that hetero males sucking cock is of only minute and passing interest to you . . . but what, exactly, is at the root of the fun (some) women get in seeing this?

For me, there's a couple of things that make this kind of scenario appealing ...
- As the dominant, I get off on the fact that the slave is trusting of me and wants so badly to please me that they are willing to do something that, while not harmful, is really pushing some limits for them - I like that power / control aspect.
- I find the visual stimulation of two men together to be just plain arousing (the more "straight" appearing the better) - I don't know if it's because we simply don't get to see a lot of men being intimate together in this society, or something else (two other comments here - first, I do not, as a rule, get turned-on by viewing sexual stuff and second, I do love watching leathermen play).
- I like the tension that happens in the room as the interaction begins - the apprehension and the trepidation in addition to the sexual energy.
- There's something incredibly mouth-watering to watch the two men start to interact and to see the struggle within them as they start to feel aroused by the sensations and the situation and yet they're still fighting against some societal taboos. But then, gradually, the arousal and desire begins to take over and they start to let go and just enjoy what's happening.

Just some thoughts.

I totally agree!!!

(in reply to MissLaura1973)

Post #: 632

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 9:32:11 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

God, I love this thread.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to domn8trx)

Post #: 633

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 10:40:32 PM

YoungLust

Posts: 70
Joined: 3/5/2009
Status: offline

I love the irony of the title.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 634

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/9/2009 10:58:44 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Somewhere back in these past thirty odd pages, plenty of folks have discussed if an act changes the sexual orientation of a person or not. You may be interested in reading the comments.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to YoungLust)

Post #: 635

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/10/2009 3:29:46 AM

ShaktiSama

Posts: 1674
Joined: 8/13/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: samboct

I actually don't think #1 goes without saying.

Probably because it has no basis in scientific fact. The "differences" between men and women are socially trained, not "wired". They are not physiological, they are psychological and cultural.

In practical and individual terms, this sometimes makes no difference. Individual men and women may perceive themselves as having been "wired" a certain way because they are the product of both natural inclination and upbringing.

In sociological terms, it makes an enormous difference and goes much, much farther to explain the patterns of behavior we see in women and men in different societies and different time periods, and also in different individuals.

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(in reply to samboct)

Post #: 636

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/10/2009 4:56:10 AM

VanessaChaland

Posts: 362
Joined: 11/23/2008
Status: offline

To me the issue would be whether or not the male in question would ever go out, on his own, of his own volition and find another male to fellate. If not, that pretty much says one thing and establishes his sexual orientation. If he ever has, or would that clarifies his orientation as well. :)

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Post #: 637

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/10/2009 7:05:35 AM

samboct

Posts: 1817
Joined: 1/17/2007
Status: offline

Domn8trx- Welcome to the forums!

Your observation that women have a much easier time admitting they're bi rather than men flows directly from the observation that men and women are wired differently- a lot more women have had bi experiences than men, because their sexual orientation is a bit more fluid. I don't think this is a chicken and egg situation with regards to societal restrictions, i.e. men would experiment as much as women do if society didn't frown on it, I think this is one of the differences between men and women.

Shaktisama-Sorry- I have to disagree with you.
1) These days fMRI can distinguish between male and female.
2) Brains respond to both chemicals and stimuli. As an example, you can monitor changes in the brain using fMRI following a person with depression. Both a talking cure (no drugs) as well as the anti depressants such as Prozac etc. will change the chemistry of the brain that can be observed- but each operates in a very different fashion and the end result is not equivalent. Both male and female brains have different levels of various hormones such as testosterone which also affect brain function. Developmentally, the fact that boys and girls have different chemistry in their bodies is reflected in their brains as well- there is no brain/body dichotomy.
3) I do agree that societal strictures have an impact on the way men and women think- but this is intertwined with the differences in brain chemistry essentially from birth.

Vanessa- from a guy's standpoint- I think you nailed it.

An observation-(and I have no idea if this is correct....) and a question...

I'm wondering if there's a correlation between women who identify themselves as rather straight (sounds like Lady Pact as an example) and the enjoyment of a forced bi scene between men. I have a sneaking suspicion that women who are bi get less pleasure from watching such a scene because it doesn't feel so taboo to them, whereas for the straight women, the sense of being forbidden (within their own psychology) adds to the appeal. Another way of saying this is that straight women get turned on by watching men do something they wouldn't, i.e. have sex with another woman. Or is watching male/male a turn on for all women?

Sam

< Message edited by samboct -- 3/10/2009 7:08:45 AM >

(in reply to VanessaChaland)

Post #: 638

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/10/2009 1:58:51 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Sam, I'm sure that's part of it. I do like them having to overcome the taboo, any social stigma that they have in their head, their orientation if any or all of these apply. The fact that they might not be doing it if it weren't for Me and My involvement, because it's not something they would seek on their own. I like being a part of an experience that they might not have had otherwise. I like them to obey, when something in their inner nature causes them to pause. I like that bit of fear of the unknown (in them). I like the power and I like the control.

I could drive people to be bored to death if I kept going. Hopefully, that's enough. Of course, the above applies to those doing it for the first time. For those past that initial experience, there's also the excitement (it really is just plain hot), the pleasure, the passion.

Oh, I actually do enjoy watching if it's a female sub on some levels as well. That is wrapped up in the power and control aspect. A smidge of humiliation, if done right. It doesn't have all of the same appeal as m/m, unless the girl in question happens to be a lesbian. Then, all of the elements of the first paragraph (and more) come back into play. I still find m/m to be better though, since I'm sexually attracted to males.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to samboct)

Post #: 639

RE: heterosexual males sucking cock - 3/10/2009 2:18:12 PM

TwoNYCDommes

Posts: 237
Joined: 1/14/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: samboct
I'm wondering if there's a correlation between women who identify themselves as rather straight (sounds like Lady Pact as an example) and the enjoyment of a forced bi scene between men. I have a sneaking suspicion that women who are bi get less pleasure from watching such a scene because it doesn't feel so taboo to them, whereas for the straight women, the sense of being forbidden (within their own psychology) adds to the appeal. Another way of saying this is that straight women get turned on by watching men do something they wouldn't, i.e. have sex with another woman. Or is watching male/male a turn on for all women?

I'd never presume to speak for all women, but I can give you one data point that runs counter to your theory. I am bi, and I adore the sorts of scenes that are the focus of this topic. Just because I enjoy both boys and girls doesn't mean I can't understand (and enjoy making use of the fact) that many people have serious issues with interacting with those counter to their orientation.

(in reply to samboct)

Post #: 640

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