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-=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:22:42 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		-=YOU CAN’T GIVE WHAT YOU DON’T POSSESS=-
A submissive or slave cannot submit control to her Master until she has control of herself.  Many sub/slaves just don’t get it. They talk of giving up control but have none.  Without self-discipline, you do not give your Master control, you give him chaos!

-Kalon Eric

Just saying...

(part of random BDSM philosophy for the masses) 

< Message edited by ResidentSadist -- 6/22/2008 6:29:31 PM >

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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:25:26 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		I'm sorry.. I'll try to do better!

*grin*

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Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:26:59 PM   
trappedinamuseum


Posts: 5066
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline 		Makes sense, however random.


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Don't come back for me.
Don't come back at all" - Jar of Hearts

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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:27:37 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop
I'm sorry.. I'll try to do better!

*grin*

LOL... you are such a hoot. 

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-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:28:12 PM   
fluffyswitch


Posts: 1108
Joined: 9/29/2007
From: Buffalo
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: trappedinamuseum

Makes sense, however random.



yeah i was thinking the same thing lol.


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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:28:41 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		and I'm cute, too ;)

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polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:30:37 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop
and I'm cute, too ;)

Very cute in a chaotic sort of way.

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-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:30:39 PM   
trappedinamuseum


Posts: 5066
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline 		So, RS, how do you suggest a person build up their self-control?

_____________________________

"You're gonna catch a cold, from the ice inside you soul.
Don't come back for me.
Don't come back at all" - Jar of Hearts

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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:33:35 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline 		In other words, the sub can be a total dithering fucktard-but the Master must be PERFECT.

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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:39:56 PM   
Sabella


Posts: 265
Joined: 7/26/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

In other words, the sub can be a total dithering fucktard-but the Master must be PERFECT.
HA! Is there a farm where these perfect Masters are grown? Perhaps knee deep in manure & in a dark shed?


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and that eye turned inward so that it looked into his mind and he died of what he saw there.”
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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:42:16 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sabella

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

In other words, the sub can be a total dithering fucktard-but the Master must be PERFECT.
HA! Is there a farm where these perfect Masters are grown? Perhaps knee deep in manure & in a dark shed?



With as many subs as are demanding them as thier proper due for the "gift of submission"...you would think there is a clone farm out  there somehwere.

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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:43:33 PM   
dcnovice


Posts: 37282
Joined: 8/2/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: trappedinamuseum

So, RS, how do you suggest a person build up their self-control?


Good question.

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it's never enough to keep up.

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INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:43:51 PM   
trappedinamuseum


Posts: 5066
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline 		Hmmm.... seem to recall an X-Files episode about that once..

Its a conspiracy!!!

< Message edited by trappedinamuseum -- 6/22/2008 6:44:05 PM >

_____________________________

"You're gonna catch a cold, from the ice inside you soul.
Don't come back for me.
Don't come back at all" - Jar of Hearts

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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:45:00 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice


quote:

ORIGINAL: trappedinamuseum

So, RS, how do you suggest a person build up their self-control?


Good question.


Growing up and acting like a competent adult is usually a good start. Stopping with the habit of creating mountains out of mole hills is a good second.

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My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:48:25 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

-=YOU CAN’T GIVE WHAT YOU DON’T POSSESS=-
A submissive or slave cannot submit control to her Master until she has control of herself.  Many sub/slaves just don’t get it. They talk of giving up control but have none.  Without self-discipline, you do not give your Master control, you give him chaos!

-Kalon Eric

Just saying...

(part of random BDSM philosophy for the masses) 


I'm not an advocate of what I'm about to say, but I was absolutely not in control of myself when my Master met me.  I was lost but with a lot of pent up potential.  It was his choice to tap into me and to do so without allowing the chaos I attempted at bringing him.

Perfect?  No, not perfect.  But perfect for me.  And I am forever grateful for his ungodly amount of patience as well as his unwillingness to put up with my bullshit and drama.

Then again, he pushed me very hard, and I had to be willing to go with it and do what was expected.  We both put a lot of work into this.  The end result, four years later, is something we both enjoy.

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Good is the enemy of great.

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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:50:32 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

-=YOU CAN’T GIVE WHAT YOU DON’T POSSESS=-
A submissive or slave cannot submit control to her Master until she has control of herself.  Many sub/slaves just don’t get it. They talk of giving up control but have none.  Without self-discipline, you do not give your Master control, you give him chaos!

-Kalon Eric

Just saying...

(part of random BDSM philosophy for the masses) 


I'm not an advocate of what I'm about to say, but I was absolutely not in control of myself when my Master met me.  I was lost but with a lot of pent up potential.  It was his choice to tap into me and to do so without allowing the chaos I attempted at bringing him.

Perfect?  No, not perfect.  But perfect for me.  And I am forever grateful for his ungodly amount of patience as well as his unwillingness to put up with my bullshit and drama.

Then again, he pushed me very hard, and I had to be willing to go with it and do what was expected.  We both put a lot of work into this.  The end result, four years later, is something we both enjoy.


But you also chose not to throw a hissy fit and walk away when he would not put up with your bs. You did the work-that's the difference between you and most.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

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Profile   Post #: 16
RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:52:04 PM   
trappedinamuseum


Posts: 5066
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

Growing up and acting like a competent adult is usually a good start. Stopping with the habit of creating mountains out of mole hills is a good second.


Good thoughts.  However, I feel that I am a competent adult.  I work full time, and go to grad school.  I am completely financially independent, pay my bills on time, have good relationships with people, avoid drama and try to avoid stress.  i have my scars, but who doesn't.

Yet, I have no self-control when it comes to books, or dining out.  I know I shuldn't, know it would save me money (though i don't out spend my means), and know I am only hurting myself when i give into the temptation.

I don't believe this makes me incompetent, or someone who makes mountains out of molehills.  I have no self-control when it comes to some things, and am trying to work on that.

Actual advice would have been appreciated, instead of sweeping generalizations.


*edited for a spelling error and an addition*



< Message edited by trappedinamuseum -- 6/22/2008 6:54:50 PM >

_____________________________

"You're gonna catch a cold, from the ice inside you soul.
Don't come back for me.
Don't come back at all" - Jar of Hearts

(in reply to Leatherist)
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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:52:33 PM   
hejira92


Posts: 2272
Joined: 10/27/2005
From: Palm Beach County, Fl
Status: offline 		I actually (gasp!) totally agree. I could not have the relationship I do, with the depth of submission and ownership, if I was not a competent, fully functioning adult, able to make rational decisions for myself, my children and my students on a daily basis.
 
It is because I am in possession of much personal power that it grows and is magnified in Him when I bow down to serve. A Power Exchange, if you will.

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RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:54:22 PM   
fluffyswitch


Posts: 1108
Joined: 9/29/2007
From: Buffalo
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: trappedinamuseum

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

Growing up and acting like a competent adult is usually a good start. Stopping with the habit of creating mountains out of mole hills is a good second.


Good thoughts.  However, I feel that I am a competent adult.  I work full time, and go to grad school.  I am completely financially independent, pay my bills on time, have good relationships with people, avoid drama and try to avoid stress.  i have my scars, but who doesn't.

Yet, I have no self-control when it comes to books, or dining out.  I know I shuldn't, know it would save me money (though i don't out spend my means), and know I am only hurting myself when i give into the temptation.

I don't believe this makes me incompetent, or someone who makes mountains out of molehills.  I have no self-control when it comes to some things, and am trying to work on that.

Actual advice would ahve been appreciated.





i agree with the above, and i also would question the assertion that 'most' do not have a level of self control. i think that self control is expressed in a wide range of behaviors, and that it is impossible, or almost impossible to determine that without knowing a person.


_____________________________


“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” churchill

the first rule of fluff club is that you don't talk about fluff club!

(in reply to trappedinamuseum)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: -=You Can't Give What You Don't Possess=- - 6/22/2008 6:55:27 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline 		If it invokes reflection-it is good advice.
 
Even if it hurts to hear it. Including me.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to trappedinamuseum)
Profile   Post #: 20
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