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RE: Fetish wear - 7/14/2008 7:41:01 PM   
KneelingSilently


Posts: 38
Joined: 4/15/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

I think I look HOT in my pics. 



After careful review I second that. :)


_____________________________

It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so. - Mark Twain

(in reply to MsStarlett)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Fetish wear - 7/14/2008 9:14:11 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Morsigil
There are many reasons people choose particular pictures of themselves for this site, and just because they choose one of themselves in a sexy get-up doesn't mean they're here for sex. They could just like the picture because it makes them feel sexy when they look at it. Maybe it reinforces their world-view in a way that you aren't privvy. Further, who says they put any effort into dressing up for a picture for this site? Most of the pro dommes have professionally done fetish pictures for their websites and use them here as well. Others simply get them done during play, at parties, by friends or lovers.

Along with MmeGigs response, I found this to be wonderful.  Actually, one of the best pics of Me that was ever put up on CM, is the picture that is on My sub's profile.  The other is on My husband's.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Morsigil)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Fetish wear - 7/14/2008 9:50:35 PM   
MistressSassy66


Posts: 1675
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline 		Maybe its because they just look sexy in
everything they wear.Perhaps they have a large
chest and cleavage is a way of life.
Maybe they want to show their beauty and make it
clear they are not looking for sex,they just want friends.
Maybe they add not looking for sex because there are
hundreds of men looking to get laid.Even if you do
add not looking for sex they still send emails asking.
No matter what is worn some guy will find it sexy.
Why should We(women) have to dress down because some guys
cant control their hard-on.It is just like blaming the girl for what she wore when
she was raped.

Dont hate Us because We are beautiful and are not afraid to show it.

_____________________________

Mistress Sassy

http://www.mistresssassy.com

In the Immortal Words of Bob....Fuck the dumb shit.

"I love you not only for what you are,But for what I am when I'm with you."- Opening line from a poem by Roy Croft

(in reply to MsStarlett)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Fetish wear - 7/14/2008 10:04:12 PM   
LaMistressa


Posts: 460
Joined: 12/4/2006
Status: offline 		One of my very favorite things about fetishwear is that it makes the wearer look hot, and it highlights the features that the wearer likes best. I enjoy seeing a variety of different sizes and types of people in corsets, hobble skirts, catsuits, leather, latex, pvc - does that mean I'm going to have sex with all of them? No! Some of us enjoy dressing (and showing off our wardrobes) for the sheer pleasure of dressing.


(in reply to Jaded2005)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Fetish wear - 7/14/2008 10:33:17 PM   
StaceyTheBitch


Posts: 78
Joined: 7/4/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jaded2005

I have a question for the ages. Why is it alot of the photos show women in the sexy outfits and revealing poses, yet in the profile they say "no sex". Maybe I'm misunderstanding something but why show something that isn't offered? I would equate that to 'bait and switch'. Offering chocolates and receiving a saltlick....LOL  Or the one I love is "This lifestyle isn't about sex".......really?? Why put all that effort in dressing for a picture when that isn't the intention?

I've received mail from guys with all kinds of fetishes and kink fantasies and many of these guys have two things in common.
One: They want their Domme to be beautiful/sexy and to dress in a beautiful/sexy outfit.
Two: They don't require sex in order to have their fantasy/fetish fulfilled

How is it most professional Dominatrices dress sexy and give no sex yet they get more business then they can handle? If it were bait and switch or only about sex don't you think the guys would stop showing up?

Many guys with non sexual fantasies still want the sexual look in a Domme.
.......

Who defines sexy? Some guys call the girl-next-door look sexy and are turned off by the leather and whip look.
Your sexy is not everyone else's sexy.
.....

The short answer to your question of "why?" is.......because we can.


_____________________________

I'm a pathetic attention whore.

(in reply to Jaded2005)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Fetish wear - 7/14/2008 10:34:11 PM   
HeavansKeeper


Posts: 1254
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jaded2005

I have a question for the ages. Why is it alot of the photos show women in the sexy outfits and revealing poses, yet in the profile they say "no sex". Maybe I'm misunderstanding something but why show something that isn't offered? I would equate that to 'bait and switch'. Offering chocolates and receiving a saltlick....LOL  Or the one I love is "This lifestyle isn't about sex".......really?? Why put all that effort in dressing for a picture when that isn't the intention?


It probably has a lot to do with the focus and effort of a man with a hard on vs. the tired sleepiness of a man who just lost his (the right way).  The clothes are the tease.  Think of it like an added cuck-kink without the actuality of it.  She looks sooooooooooooo slutty in her fem-domme fetish wear, but won't even touch your rod with anything less than the crop.  Using sexy clothing adds to the want factor.  Want to please her, want to make her proud, and with that pink latex skirt, WANT WANT WANT - PANT-PANT-PANT!

_____________________________

The Loving Owner of HisHeavan

... You've waited your whole life for this moment...

(in reply to Jaded2005)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 12:24:29 AM   
subcain


Posts: 1
Joined: 7/8/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DianeB

Why can't a woman wear sexy outfits and not want sex? The outfits mean nothing...Too many guys think with the wrong head before they speak/type...


Diane


quote:

ORIGINAL: Dave Chappelle

"I know all girls that dress like sluts aren't sluts, but I just have a problem with false advertising.
It would be like me, a comedian, dressing as a police officer. Then, when some young lady needs help, lookin at her and saying..
WHAT!!!!,  just because I'm dressed like a police officer, that automatically makes me a police officer!!!!"

Dave Chappelle


Reminded me of that quote hehe.
I guess in this case it would translate just because a woman has some sexy\kink outfit on in no way means she wants sex but on the other hand you cant blame someone for mistakenly asuming she does

tbh it is more of a power trip if something i cant have but teribly want is on display, makes things more fun for both parties

< Message edited by subcain -- 7/15/2008 12:38:11 AM >

(in reply to DianeB)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 12:58:05 AM   
DelilahDeb


Posts: 429
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline 		OP: Look, I don't know about you, but the 98% of photos taken of me look like hell. No matter what I'm wearing, or not. I'm sort of anti-photogenic. Having some self-esteem, this fucking annoys me.

So the photos I choose to post are those that reasonably resemble me without making me look like a moron, like a mouth-breather, like a blimp. I spend a lot of time starkers most days, in or out of scene, because I am comfortable that way. Wearing my skin. Guess what? Like almost all American males (and most females, let's be blunt), you believe that skin equals sex (damn those tight-assed Puritans!). It's a cultural sickness that sickens the Bible Belt in particular. Well, skin does not equal sex. Dressing attractively, and preferring to post an attractive image of myself, does not make me or anyone else here a whore, any more than a man wearing an Armani suit and Rolex to the opera and parking his BMW in the alley three blocks away to save the cost of valet service is "asking for it" when three muggers take him down and strip him. Get a grip.

If you bother with a dictionary, you will find that every practice common to the BDSM & fetish community: sadism, masochism, fetish, etc., is defined as an activity from which the person practicing it derives emotional, sexual satisfaction. Whether or not any genital contact occurs, whether or not any orgasms occur, whether or not any skin-to-skin contact of any sort occurs!

Really, we do this because we like it. By MUTUAL CONSENT. After negotiation, and agreement, with safe words. With people we like. And, y'know, right now, I don't like you.

quote:

MaestraDommelyUNIVERSA commands you:
1. Strip naked.
2. Open mouth.
3. Insert foot.
4. Seize shin.
5. Pull hard into your throat.
6. Stand still.

Whereupon she seizes her buggy whip and taser, and begins to circle you…slowly, ominously, and in total silence.


Lady Delilah Deb


< Message edited by DelilahDeb -- 7/15/2008 1:13:43 AM >

_____________________________

"All acts of love & pleasure are My rituals."
--from the Charge of the Goddess, a Wiccan teaching

(in reply to MsStarlett)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 4:34:29 AM   
MsStarlett


Posts: 1879
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KneelingSilently

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

I think I look HOT in my pics. 



After careful review I second that. :)



Thank you.  See?  It works.

HeavensKeeper hit the nail on the head.  The primal desire for the Domme is part of the dynamic. 

Someone on another thread, some time ago, was asking about why FemDoms only want the good looking subs.  The prevailing answer was "Because if you've got a line of people begging for your attention, it is human nature to pick out the ones you find attractive first."  Mind you, LOOKS are not everything... but it IS the first thing anyone notices.  You can't just suddenly know what another person's character is.

The question turns... Given a choice, would you select the Domme you find attractive (Big, thin, tall, short, red-head or blond?) wearing a hot out fit over the next one that you personally find less attractive in dirty sweats?  You bet your sweet boots you would!  You may find out later that the one in Sweats is the far better Dom... but at first glance, one follows their gut... which is guided by the eye.




_____________________________

It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed,
the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning,
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.

(in reply to KneelingSilently)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 5:15:49 AM   
TNstepsout


Posts: 1558
Joined: 8/3/2005
Status: offline 		First of all the concept that dressing sexy is like displaying merchandise is distorted.  If your friend has a very nice sports car and he enjoys driving it around, does that mean he wants YOU to drive it?  If he said "hey wanna take a ride in my new sports car?" does that mean he wants you to drive it? It is not a bait and switch because there is nothing for sale here.  

(in reply to MsStarlett)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 5:31:31 AM   
HeavansKeeper


Posts: 1254
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline 		TN,

Can't it be both?  Some women dress sexy to feel good (and sexy =P)  some women dress sexy for attention.  I'm sure there are other reasons, but those are the two reasons I dress sexy when the moon strikes. 

_____________________________

The Loving Owner of HisHeavan

... You've waited your whole life for this moment...

(in reply to TNstepsout)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 6:22:36 AM   
MsStarlett


Posts: 1879
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline 		No, TN - he doesn't want you to drive his car... he wants you to ENVY his car.  To desire what cannot be had.

_____________________________

It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed,
the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning,
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.

(in reply to HeavansKeeper)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 7:13:48 AM   
MistressMiracle


Posts: 56
Joined: 9/23/2007
Status: offline 		Well said, MsStarlett :)   BRAVO

(in reply to MsStarlett)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 8:18:04 AM   
HarryVanWinkle


Posts: 1720
Joined: 5/8/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KneelingSilently

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

I think I look HOT in my pics. 



After careful review I second that. :)



I third it.

(in reply to KneelingSilently)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 8:23:16 AM   
HeavansKeeper


Posts: 1254
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HarryVanWinkle

quote:

ORIGINAL: KneelingSilently

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

I think I look HOT in my pics. 



After careful review I second that. :)



I third it.


We have a proposal and a second, if we're using Roberts' rules of order we'd put it to a majority vote now before adopting it as a CM bylaw.

_____________________________

The Loving Owner of HisHeavan

... You've waited your whole life for this moment...

(in reply to HarryVanWinkle)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 11:18:30 AM   
Wheldrake


Posts: 477
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

The question turns... Given a choice, would you select the Domme you find attractive (Big, thin, tall, short, red-head or blond?) wearing a hot out fit over the next one that you personally find less attractive in dirty sweats?  You bet your sweet boots you would!  You may find out later that the one in Sweats is the far better Dom... but at first glance, one follows their gut... which is guided by the eye.



Actually, and with apologies for being difficult, I instinctively take dominants a bit more seriously when they're NOT kitted out in fetish gear or other ostentatiously sexy outfits. This is a bad, poorly founded mental habit of mine, since many capable dominants clearly do enjoy dressing up. However, my subconscious mind tends to see the leather catsuit or the skimpy lingerie, or whatever, and assume that the woman wearing it is either pandering to fairly banal fantasies or trying to conform to a stereotype of what a Dominant Goddess should look like. No matter how much I tell my subconscious to stop doing this, a woman in plain, comfortable clothes somehow comes across as just slightly more authentic in her dominance. But this only applies to first impressions - beyond that, what she says and does is much more important than what she looks like.

(in reply to MsStarlett)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 11:23:39 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Point of Order.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Wheldrake)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 11:47:41 AM   
Venatrix


Posts: 2238
Joined: 11/28/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Wheldrake

. . . I instinctively take dominants a bit more seriously when they're NOT kitted out in fetish gear or other ostentatiously sexy outfits. . . .



You can't help how you see things, but the domina is going to wear what she likes.  I try to find a common ground with my sub, to see if we can both be aesthetically pleased.

(in reply to Wheldrake)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 12:23:19 PM   
Wheldrake


Posts: 477
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wheldrake

. . . I instinctively take dominants a bit more seriously when they're NOT kitted out in fetish gear or other ostentatiously sexy outfits. . . .



You can't help how you see things, but the domina is going to wear what she likes.  I try to find a common ground with my sub, to see if we can both be aesthetically pleased.


Oh, absolutely! I wouldn't dream of telling my Mistress, or anyone else for that matter, what they should or shouldn't be wearing. I just wanted to make the point that Ms. Starlett's statement that male submissives would naturally prefer a dominant woman "wearing a hot outfit", which sounded dangerously like a sweeping generalisation, wasn't applicable to ALL of us slaveboys.

(in reply to Venatrix)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Fetish wear - 7/15/2008 12:41:05 PM   
Venatrix


Posts: 2238
Joined: 11/28/2007
Status: offline 		Generalisations never do apply to everyone; that's why they're called "generalisations."

(in reply to Wheldrake)
Profile   Post #: 40
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