Termyn8or
Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
Status: offline
|
Too bad cjan can't see this.
"I jacked the keys to her fucking car and crashed the piece of shit " I don't do that, I have keys to two cars right now and I am not stupid enough to go driving around.
I might need help, but only for my mental andf physical well being, I do not go out there and get stupid, and I havent done it in about a decade. There are no issues. I have falling outs and falling ins with friends, but who doesn't ? I have problems at work, and with work itself, but who doesn't ?
As much as I have said, there is very little of kmy personal life exposed. Want it ?
Right now I have rehooked up with the toughest motherfucker I know, and he still owes me five hundred bucks. I have been thinking of having him go beat the shit out of a guy who owes me fifteen hundred bucks. I know he can do it, but you can't go get the guy at his house, he knows the locals.
How much more do you want ? I am constantly uder an incredible amount of stress and I have a job offer in Reno. It is looking better every day.
That wouldclean my life up fast.
Fact of the matter is all I need is something to drink other than beer. Someone asked if I drink for the buzz, I guess I do but I want it controlled. There have been days when I drank and then was not pleased with being fucked up, I just want a mild buzz. A million people will tell you that this impossible, but so are alot of other things that people do.
How many people have drank and then wished they did not have the buzz that they paid for ? It has happened to me quite a few times. I learned my lesson about that with thirty days in jail and thousands of dollars. I won't do that again, but if you are my friend I will come in the middle of the night to help you, as long as the cops are not there.
I can drive when I can't even walk,and shoot too, but I won't. You better be in somke pretty bad shit when you call me for that sort of shit. Don't take this lightly. I will die for true friends, and they would for me, but what keeps the world turning is that we use our fucking brains and don't have to ask for that particular favor.
Alot of you might think I am full of shit, come on over. When you see the AK47 next to me you might change your mind. They are not beating me on my turf,not the N______, the Bloods or the Crips, fukum. They bleed just as fast as anyone.
Yeah, they are bad to the bone, until you put a bullet inem. Then they are an itty bitty baby. Guaranteed.
Who else here has been shot ? Because if you have you get alot more creedence out of me, people tell me how I should klive and everything, but they do not know thew conditions.
I could afford to move out easily, but I refuse, that would be running away. I will not let my enemies win. I will not be chased away frommy home, ever. MAybe you don't understand that. I own this fucking place, andf I ain't going nowhere. Period.
These thugs, fukum. And we gotem too. I'll talk to them, even make friendly with them, but here, I am higher on the food chain, and I don't put up with bullshit.
I have won and lost battles right here, but I am still here, most of them are gone. Where ? Why would I care ?
So, I might not be in perfect shgape right now, but I still have something. Stopping drinking is now onthe table, due to y'all. First thing I need is water. I will not drink tap, nor any of the fucking toxic waste most people drink.
I am also not stupid enough to just quit alcohol all at once, that it one of the things that kills people's livers. Every dead drunk I ever knew quit. The ones who kept it up are all living. Your liver learns to deal with the alcohol. You make a drastic change like that, you cause problems, and idiots in the medical profession, having been taught to only see the surface, they might say "Oh, if he had quit a few years later he might be alive now" and that might be true.
But the stupid fucks do not realize that is a shock to the system. What I do I will do gradually. If I get down to two beers a day am I still a drunk ? And do I really care what anyone thinks ? But I did ask.
Smoking is actually a bit different as well. (cigaettes) I can live witrhout beer and weed, but as long as I have smokes. I used to cost me nine dollars a day, but I found a way to get that down. It's still twenty bicks for a carton every week. Allnice and legal too, you would be proud of me, I actually did something legal.
This eatingproblmI have seems to be abating, I am already drinking less and eating more. I figure that as a plus. But there are still alot of things I can't easily resolve. But then that is life.
But no matter what, I am going back through this thread and everybody who figured it was a a good time to fuck with me ,,,,,, well try to keep your shit together.
If those words came fromyourmind, I can read through them. I will get past your face to see whayt;s really you. But don'tr worry, I will not attack you, I asked for these answers and I gotem.
In a way I thought this wouldbe a "like me or hate me" thread, but it has diverged significantly.
And in the end, I live or die, and about that I still say and always will - SO WHAT ?
T
|
RE: When I die. - 
Profile
New Messages
No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages
Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages
Locked w/o New Messages
Post New Thread