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Knealing - 7/19/2008 12:05:53 AM   
Munkee07


Posts: 19
Joined: 2/1/2008
Status: offline 		deep breath, ok im new to the bdsm world, and im being trained for a collar..I know once collared i know some knealing protocols are going to be in place. I have to admit when I was told this I was excited about it. Well now that I have come into situations where I should kneal the idea freaks me out a bit. I was wondering when u were first introduced to knealing how did you feel about it? How do you feel about it now?
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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 3:06:12 AM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline 		Not trying to be a smart-arse here but if it means this much to you, then you should at least know how to spell it correctly; it's "kneel" - there's no 'a'....
 
Personally, I've noted that the few newbie subs I've known were initially conflicted with the concept of kneeling.  The sub in them was much like yourself, inwardly excited at most things to do with D/s protocol or dynamics etc.  But the greater society in general would tend to frown on such behaviour, and that's where we live our growing and impressionable years - we've been "programmed" or engineered to conform to society's expectations, and women don't kneel for their men!  Probably shouldn't mention it to any feminist friends, either... lol
 
The key is trust and finding a Dom you respect and connect with.  Once you do, you soon realise that society isn't so important in your personal relationships. 
 
Focus.

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(in reply to Munkee07)
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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 3:27:43 AM   
eyesopened


Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline 		When i first thought about kneeling... or even being led like a dog on all fours... my first fear was that i'd burst out laughing and ruin the mood...lol.

But it didn't happen that way.  From the beginning it felt as natural as breathing.  One of my favorite places to be is kneeling next to my Master with my head resting on His thigh.  And being led like a dog?  Well it does something to my mindset that is just plain hot.

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Proudly owned by InkedMaster. He is the one i obey, serve, honor and love.

No one is honored for what they've received. Honor is the reward for what has been given.

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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 5:14:20 AM   
graceadieu


Posts: 1518
Joined: 3/20/2008
From: Maryland
Status: offline 		I love being on my knees (especially if there's oral involved ).

For me, if it's brought in right at the beginning of the scene itt still takes me a few moments get over the inner conflict between my subbie desires and my feeling of "WTF I am doing?". But once I've gotten into the scene and into that headspace, it's no big deal at all, and IMO is really hot. I think it helps that the people I've played with haven't made it some big protocol deal - it's just another thing I'm told to do.

< Message edited by graceadieu -- 7/19/2008 5:15:13 AM >

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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 6:25:06 AM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline 		I went through exactly the same dilemna as you when I started as a newbie 4 or so years ago.  I did struggle with it - it seemed a bit theatrical and I was always worried I'd ruin the mood by giggling or something.
Now I've found someone who inspires me to kneel for Him.  I'm happiest when on the floor, kneeling at His feet, and I find I naturally fall to my knees when bringing Him a drink. 
I'd say don't worry about it.  When it feels right, you won't even think about, you will just do it and it will feel like the most natural thing in the world.


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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 6:26:30 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		fast reply

kneeling like most kink-related things falls under "your kink is not my kink" category.

personally, i don't like kneeling.

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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 6:32:12 AM   
simpleplan2


Posts: 461
Joined: 7/5/2008
Status: offline 		Or it won't and that's ok too.

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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 7:28:43 AM   
sujuguete


Posts: 263
Joined: 7/3/2008
From: DC metro area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: eyesopened

From the beginning it felt as natural as breathing.  One of my favorite places to be is kneeling next to my Master with my head resting on His thigh.


Yup, kneeling is a natural expression of my respect and love for him.

Have you talked to your Dom about your feelings and concerns about kneeling?  He needs to know if you are struggling with something, so he can decide how hard and fast to pursue it (or to let it go).  Sometimes for me, just saying, "I'm not comfortable with this right now" helps me loosen up and become more accepting of things D wants me to do for him.

(in reply to eyesopened)
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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 8:22:31 AM   
Sky42


Posts: 31
Joined: 3/19/2007
Status: offline 		You'll get used to it if it's important, if not, then not. Personally, I love kneeling at my owner's feet, I feel more awkward sitting on the couch or at a dinner table in public when I'd much rather be there at their side.  My problem comes in that my body doesn't like kneeling for long periods of time. Knees/ankles/legs in general tend to cramp up and just be painful, especially if not on carpet.  It's something I push through, but it's often not at times when my owner is intending there to be pain, or it subtracts from other pain they are giving me.  I'm working on it by trying to kneel more each day, but it seems to be a long process.

(in reply to sujuguete)
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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 8:23:37 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Eh, not much.  More concerned that the other person understood and internalized the kneeling as an act of intimacy and authority, rather than using it as a pretty show off thing or to avoid intimacy.

Also there's the physical comfort level, very few people are trained enough to handle literal kneeling for any serious length of time.

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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 9:01:08 AM   
pixidustpet


Posts: 857
Joined: 6/4/2008
Status: offline 		i dont kneel.  period.  i have arthritis in both knees, plus nerve damage to the left one as well that doesnt allow me to put weight on it without large amounts of non consentual pain. 

but that's me.

kitten

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 9:41:31 AM   
katie978


Posts: 352
Joined: 7/21/2007
Status: offline 		  Wait....kneeling is supposed to be sexy? For me, it's just kind of a position. I usually assume it for a particular purpose, but apart from that, it doesn't really make me feel one way or another. I think it's cause've martial arts-I've been kneeling for years in a non-sexual manner. By this point, it's pretty routine.

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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 10:13:05 AM   
gabrielarya


Posts: 16
Status: offline 		i use to kneel all the time for Master and i love doing it as a sign of respect to Him, but once Master took me to the doctor and seen the damage to my knees and ankles He will no longer let me kneel because He says He will Hurt me but will not harm me so know i just sit on the floor by His side ... i really do miss it but i understand why i am not permitted.. anyways just a mere slaves thoughts 

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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 10:42:00 AM   
Shawn1066


Posts: 987
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline 		When I kneel for my Owner, it's the same way every time.  I kneel, with a cup of coffee in hand, as she gets home from work.  This is something that I did for her, as a surprise, one of the first time I was over for a few days.  It's become a tradition since then.

DV's Fox

(in reply to katie978)
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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 11:13:46 AM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		Maybe it was growing up attending Catholic church, but kneeling has always signified respect and reverence to me.  My Master was the first man I had knelt to, outside of church as a youth.  I met him in a kneel.  It felt right, and it's one of the places where I am most comfortable with him - kneeling at his feet.

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Good is the enemy of great.

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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 12:13:04 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I find the physical act painful and uncomfortable. So I rarely kneel and even when I do it's on a thick pillow. I'm more comfortable, should he want me on the floor, sitting on a pillow. You can get kneeling benches or a low stool to sit on instead.

However you, like us, may find it doesn't speak to you or do anything for you. Except for a role play scene or oral I rarely kneel. He prefers me next to him on the couch so he can wrap his arm around me and play with my nipples.

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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 1:53:44 PM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50
The key is trust and finding a Dom you respect and connect with.  Once you do, you soon realise that society isn't so important in your personal relationships. 
 
Focus.


Bingo!  As usual Focus, well done.

For me, kneeling is in the same category as honorifics.  I'd prefer to never command such a thing.  I'd rather that such an intimate and personal expression of submission happen because it was heart felt, not because I demanded it.  To OP, I'd say that if you're not comfortable with kneeling, to not do it.  You'll know when the time is right.  As Focus implied, once the desire to kneel is YOURS and not imposed on you by the Dom, it becomes much less threatening.  In fact, I might say that for all of submission.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to Focus50)
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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 3:30:59 PM   
maat


Posts: 62
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I dabbeld in online gor and learnt some about different possitions of kneeling. To understand them and to feel them i tried and practiced kneeling alone at home. Trying to find one that feelt right for me. This was before i was ownd in rt. Once ownd i wasent asked to kneel for a long time but one day my Master told me that in the future when he came to see me i should kneel next to the bed naked and wait for him there. Ever since then thats were i stay till he tells me to move.

I love the fealing and it feels right.

I think you need to speek to your Master about this and also ask if there is a special way he prefers you to kneel, then you can practise at home. As others have said its not always comfotable and your knees arent used to it. You can train yourself. You can also find different possitions that makes it easyer or have aids like a thick blanket or a pillow to kneel on. That can be part of the ritual as well that you have a kneeling pillow that is placed somewere for you to kneel. Anyway, ask your Master, he probably knows what he whants. my Master always apriciate if i do research before and then ask what his preference is, that i put in the time to find out different ways and seek his aproval.

(in reply to leadership527)
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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 3:50:10 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline 		I don't kneel, my joints don't tolerate it.

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proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


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RE: Knealing - 7/19/2008 4:02:39 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline 		Kneeling puts me in a wonderful headspace as others have mentioned.  It didn't used to be this way when I was younger and not in a kinky relationship.  When I married in the US, my ex and I had a traditional American wedding.  When we went to Sri Lanka a year later, kneeling to one's husband was part of the ceremony.  I was PISSED when I saw my sister-in-law's wedding album and said, "I'm not kneeling to some man, so you all can take that part out of the ceremony!"  Everyone knew that I was livid at the thought of kneeling to my husband as a sign of respect and submission to him, and they thought it was "cute." 


However, as much as I protested, when it came down to the actual ceremony over there, I complied ("when in Rome" and all that crap).  When the photographer took the picture of me doing it, I whispered to my ex-husband, "They better get this on film now, because it will never fucking happen again as long as I live."  He laughed and told everyone what I said, which pissed me off even more, because they thought I was being adorable in complying with their customs.  *sigh*

Fast forward 10 years after that, I met Daddy and it was still a little weird at first.  Now, it just makes me feel so many levels of warm and fuzzy, that I do it more for me than I do for Him, as He isn't much for lots of protocols.  It's the same thing as me calling Him "Master" instead of "Daddy."  One word is just my usual mushy nickname for Him, and the other is one that lets Him know that my headspace has changed, and that my mood and "availability" (for lack of a better word) to anything He wants from me is right there for the picking, even more so than it always is. 

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Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


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