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RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/29/2008 10:37:05 AM   
fasn8nsub


Posts: 78
Joined: 9/6/2007
Status: offline 		Since you asked for some non-traditional ideas for your ED, i will relate something that worked for me.  my problem is being overweight, but i believe if you are devoted to your Master, it will work for any ED.  Mid-September 2007, Master decided it was time for me to drop 70 pounds.  i'm 50yo, chronically overweight, yadda, yadda, the usual stuff...  Because i would do anything for Him, i went on a diet and, much to the shock of everyone around me, i've lost nearly 50 pounds.  It wasn't simply Him telling me that i needed to lose.  He's done a lot of work, too.  He's set up an incentive plan to die for... use your imagination.  He encourages me, picks out new and sexy clothes and lingerie for me.  i report on my weight daily.  Sometimes i mess up.  That happens.  He doesn't admonish me in a way that will make me defensive and ruin the good work that's been done. 

Therapy and the best intentions have nothing on pleasing the one you serve and having His approval.  Accept His help.  Work together to beat the ED.  It's the only thing that has ever worked for me.  Of course, ymmv.  Good luck.

~slavebitch
Edited to note that i didn't even look at the start date of this thread...2005!  oh well.....


< Message edited by fasn8nsub -- 1/29/2008 10:46:25 AM >

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Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before. ~Mae West

(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/29/2008 10:41:40 AM   
veteranojugueton


Posts: 6
Joined: 1/28/2008
Status: offline 		I have no question to do. I am just relating my experience, as you exactly said. Then is no worth to begin a discussion over a topic too old (but so actual!) , and I will not begin a new thread. And I am not demanding attention. Only want to add my contribution, if useful, because after reading all the posts on this topic, notice a bit of confussion in the opinions. I only want to ressemble that this topic reflect the permanent conflict in the human being between instinct and reason, or reason and faith, or conscious and subconscious, or you name it. Thanks for your contribution.

(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/29/2008 10:45:59 AM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		While I know this thread is old...

My suggestion would be to stop worrying about you or your master wants for a moment. Go to a doctor, several if you like, and found out the weight your body needs to be at in order to be healthy. Then talk to your owner and have that be your new minimum weight - regardless of how happy or miserable you are about that.

Then work together to find ways to make you happy at that weight. If I became diabetic the shots would make me miserable but I wouldn't have a choice about it.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Dieplztks)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/29/2008 10:56:17 AM   
veteranojugueton


Posts: 6
Joined: 1/28/2008
Status: offline 		Know what? I dont want to go to the doctor. I want, sometimes in a foolish way, go towards my Queen and return to play

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/29/2008 10:58:51 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Compromise here. Both of you visit your doctor and have the professional announce what a healthy weight for you is. And how much exercise you can do daily before it becomes detrimental.

He's worried about you. Remove the worry by letting him talk to the doctor with you.

_____________________________

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Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to Kyami)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/29/2008 11:10:52 PM   
delilaheve


Posts: 6
Joined: 9/18/2007
Status: offline 		By restricting your food and dropping weight to your 'acceptable' numbers, you are performing the hallmark of an eating disorder.  Just because you are not 'underweight' does not mean you do not have an eating disorder.  No number will change that.  And as much as you believe you will be happy at 99, 98, 97, 96, or 95 lbs, the reality is that you may never be happy with the weight you are at.  It's classic with eating disorders, wanting to lose more, wanting to restrict more.  Anything that tells you that you will be happy at a certain weight is most likely lying.

 

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880-691-692

(in reply to fasn8nsub)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/30/2008 12:01:28 AM   
sammiebabygirl


Posts: 465
Joined: 10/23/2004
From: Upstate, NY
Status: offline 		As someone who has been on the merry-go-round of bulimarexia, even though I am now considerably overweight, I am going to say this without pulling any punches.
 
This is a disease that has no cure. Just like any addiction, there is treatment, but you will ALWAYS be in recovery. To say that you would be happier at a lesser weight is joke and you know it. You will never be happy at that weight and  it will never be low enough.
 
Eating disorders are about control, not about food or weight. You feel your life is out of control and the only thing you can control is what you do or do not put in your mouth.
 
 You need to take a good look at your life and decide if you are doing what is right for you, that is, if you are capable of seeing anything clearly enough to make that decision.
 
You have a Master. Why not give up the control and let your Master help you?
 
jen

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(in reply to delilaheve)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/30/2008 12:05:02 AM   
collaredncontent


Posts: 81
Joined: 1/21/2008
From: GA, USA.
Status: offline 		I've never had an eating disorder but I have a similar problem that comes and goes. I like self-injury. Now, in the masochism world this probably isn't anything shocking or new but both my Master and I have dealt with cutting and both of us put it in our past. For the most part. I slip up from time to time but never anything more serious than a scratch now. It hurts Jack to see me do it to myself...actually I think both of us were the reason the other one stopped. I'd cut and he'd be unhappy, he'd cut and I'd be unhappy. We worked through it but that temptation is always right there. It's not about what makes who happy, it's really about health. It's not healthy to starve yourself to lose weight just as it's not healthy to take a knife to your body [out of the context of SM play where you are hopefully keeping it in the realm of safe, sane, and consentual]. You don't *need* to starve yourself just as much as I don't *need* to self-injure. Oh god it gets so tempting and I can understand that the fixation feels like a dire need, but it's not. Your Master is trying to keep your best interests in mind, but I will not call you selfish for impulses that are beyond your control.

My advice? Distance yourself from things that make you crave to lose weight. If picking up a magazine with a thin girl on the front makes you think about how 'over weight' you are, put it away and don't pick up magazines like that. It's hard at first, your mind has been trained to be fixated on a subject and it doesn't let go easily. You have to force it like a toddler to listen to you and take away its favorite toys. After a while the *need* calms down and you find yourself going maybe a day without thinking about it. Then a week. Then a month. Keep at it and fall on your Master for support in those times that it seems overwhelming.

I wish you the best.
-Brian.

(in reply to Kyami)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/30/2008 12:06:42 AM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

Eating disorders are about control, not about food or weight. You feel your life is out of control and the only thing you can control is what you do or do not put in your mouth.
quote:

You have a Master. Why not give up the control and let your Master help you?
 
jen

Ouch....that struck a chord with me.....


< Message edited by breatheasone -- 1/30/2008 12:08:35 AM >

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(in reply to sammiebabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/30/2008 12:15:04 AM   
iammachine


Posts: 1549
Joined: 1/25/2006
Status: offline 		Call it a hunch, but as someone that has experience with EDs, I doubt that "losing some weight" will make you okay with yourself. I will echo the statements of many others, go see a doctor or a nutritionist and definitively find out what a healthy weight is for you, and work on learning to be happy with yourself at that weight, regardless of what other ideas you might have about it. 

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I still hear you scream... in every breath, every single motion

(in reply to Dieplztks)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/30/2008 12:32:11 AM   
sammiebabygirl


Posts: 465
Joined: 10/23/2004
From: Upstate, NY
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

quote:

Eating disorders are about control, not about food or weight. You feel your life is out of control and the only thing you can control is what you do or do not put in your mouth.
quote:

You have a Master. Why not give up the control and let your Master help you?

jen

Ouch....that struck a chord with me.....



Sorry breatheasone.
 
 I said I wasn't going to pull any punches. It's called tough love and although I do not know people here personally, I love them enough to say it like it is.
 
jen



_____________________________

"Men are like pianos. When they get upright, i feel GRAND!!!"

http://charldine.com/jen2820

(in reply to breatheasone)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/30/2008 12:52:02 AM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sammiebabygirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

quote:

Eating disorders are about control, not about food or weight. You feel your life is out of control and the only thing you can control is what you do or do not put in your mouth.
quote:

You have a Master. Why not give up the control and let your Master help you?

jen

Ouch....that struck a chord with me.....



Sorry breatheasone.
 
 I said I wasn't going to pull any punches. It's called tough love and although I do not know people here personally, I love them enough to say it like it is.
 
jen



HEY!! I'm a masochist so its all good seriously though...I had never thought about what I do in that way before...I hesitate to ask my Master for help though...He has SO many other things going on with His own family, and His job and all...I will definately be more aware of my motives now thats for sure....


_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
Mike posts in black font
candy posts in pink font

(in reply to sammiebabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/30/2008 7:25:45 AM   
dawndewdropbaby


Posts: 37
Joined: 1/29/2005
Status: offline 		Let me fish back in my brain and let me remember what happened when I thought I was fat and stopped eating. It was when I was a freshmen in high school and I completely gave up eating period, I was a miserable depressed girl to begin with and even more so after because I had no energy. I never went to thearpy I simply accepted that I would be bigger than the girls in my grade and started eating again. As it turns out from depriving myself of food and energy for so long eveything I ate was automatically absorbed in my body to be stored. I was amazed that I actually became a LOT larger once I started eating again. fortunately I was a band nerd and due to healthy eating decisions and band I lost 47 pounds the next year. I figured out I could do it on my own and eat food....cause I love food. So what you're doing is stupid, I see how you feel though, but even though its in my past I can't get over how pathetic I really was.

(in reply to Kyami)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/30/2008 8:28:49 AM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline 		i just want to pitch in my usual bitch and moan when people bring up eating disorders...anorexic is a disorder, not a weight....it is possible to be a fat anorexic, i know, i am one...my body doesn't loose weight when i starve, it gains...and i've lost a lot of fucking weight and a lot of fucking inches now that i eat on a regular basis....but maybe i am built backwards....

and not all "Masters" have the knowledge to be able to give you the best advice, and while i agree that the OP was going back to old thinking patterns that i would consider an anorexia relapse mode...it is typically best left up to professionals....


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One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to dawndewdropbaby)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/30/2008 11:27:19 AM   
hisannabelle


Posts: 1992
Joined: 12/3/2006
From: Tallahassee, FL, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chellekitty

i just want to pitch in my usual bitch and moan when people bring up eating disorders...anorexic is a disorder, not a weight....it is possible to be a fat anorexic, i know, i am one...my body doesn't loose weight when i starve, it gains...and i've lost a lot of fucking weight and a lot of fucking inches now that i eat on a regular basis....but maybe i am built backwards....


then we're both built backwards. even now that i am "mostly recovered," or whatever, if i do not eat all the freaking time, i gain. like crazy. i wasn't eating much a couple weeks ago and i gained ten pounds in two weeks as a result. now that i'm eating more my weight is finally stabilizing. it's because if you don't treat your metabolism properly, it stops working.

i was also reluctant to comment on this thread, as someone who has had an eating disorder for eight years and also worked in ed awareness, etc. i did want to comment on the idea that a professional can decide what a healthy weight is and that that's a good method to decide what weight you should be. it is not, in my experience. having a professional give you an arbitrary number doesn't make it any less obsessive than if you do it yourself. yes, people with eating disorders need professional help - but good eating disorder conscious professionals also know that the number is not important, because even if it's a matter of trying to get an overweight eating disordered person down to a healthy weight, giving them a number will simply preoccupy them more. if you teach people to do what is good to their bodies and to not worry about the weight, they're much more likely to have good experiences, from what i know. the only use i see for looking to a doctor for a number at all is getting a very underweight person up to a functioning weight.

respectfully,
annabelle.


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a'ishah (the artist formerly known as annabelle)
i have the kind of beauty that moves...

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/30/2008 11:43:38 AM   
delilaheve


Posts: 6
Joined: 9/18/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dawndewdropbaby

Let me fish back in my brain and let me remember what happened when I thought I was fat and stopped eating. It was when I was a freshmen in high school and I completely gave up eating period, I was a miserable depressed girl to begin with and even more so after because I had no energy. I never went to thearpy I simply accepted that I would be bigger than the girls in my grade and started eating again. As it turns out from depriving myself of food and energy for so long eveything I ate was automatically absorbed in my body to be stored. I was amazed that I actually became a LOT larger once I started eating again. fortunately I was a band nerd and due to healthy eating decisions and band I lost 47 pounds the next year. I figured out I could do it on my own and eat food....cause I love food. So what you're doing is stupid, I see how you feel though, but even though its in my past I can't get over how pathetic I really was.


You realize 'just stopping' doesn't work, because it is a mental disorder, not a flippant decision.


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~*Mat's pet*~

880-691-692

(in reply to dawndewdropbaby)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/30/2008 12:32:09 PM   
Kalista07


Posts: 4240
Joined: 7/1/2007
Status: offline 		Okay, i'm going to be serious again............ (GRRRRRRRR)

growing up i was told (hmm..daily? Hourly? minute to minute) often that i was: fat, repulsive looking, disgusting to looking at, obese, a cow, too fat to fit through the door, etc. etc. etc. etc............ So, apparently i believed it...  Setting that aside, my belief has been that i've always been fat, ugly, repulsive looking, and damaged and defective.....  Do i have an eating disorder? (LMAO) Well, up until about six months ago the closest i would come to even admitting that was to say i have some disordered eating... (Denial at it's finest or what? :P )  i've done the whole bullimia thing and anorexia thing... i personally get more of a high off of starving myself than i do making myself vomit... i don't know if that will make sense to any of You, but that's the reality...It's almost as though if i could simply make it for X amount of time without eating than all of those things previously mentioned weren't true...My personal best is 12 days without eating anything...But i digress...
About four months ago i was at my mom's house going through some crap to throw away...There were all these pictures from when i was growing up and even from 12 years ago...i was thin,................ and it hit me...WTF!!?? If i was thin then, and had no fucking self worth, what the fuck was i going to do now??!! Well, needless to say that fucked me up greatly!!! 
Now, i continue to walk at least 2 miles everyday....i at least eat 1 1/2 times a day..... i know i should eat three, but i just am not hungry.... This is something that He and i talk about on a regular basis...He continues to remind me that it should not be about the number on a scale but on the way i feel about myself both physically and emotionally.....And He's right...Today, at least, i know this to be true..... And i believe Him...There is no magic number that i will suddenly have realms of self esteem from once i hit it....

*Edited to add* i'm not trying to be a bitch here (it actually comes rather naturally) however, i think that a lot of us would have better self esteem, self worth, etc. if we weren't constantly bambarded with this "fat" bullshit!!! Seriously, right now it's taking everything i have not to deactivate my profile and bail because i just think some people are ridiculous and petty... i think that if we are going to run around "judging" everyone at least it should be on something fair.....

Kali (who has suddenly decided that between this thread and the gaining weight thread, it's time to go)

< Message edited by Kalista07 -- 1/30/2008 12:54:59 PM >

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~~Sweedish Proverb


(in reply to delilaheve)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/30/2008 6:30:28 PM   
hisannabelle


Posts: 1992
Joined: 12/3/2006
From: Tallahassee, FL, USA
Status: offline 		greetings kali,

i don't mind threads like the gaining weight thread unless they turn into a fat-bashing thread (or a thin-bashing thread, or a normal-bashing thread, for that matter). but i do mind socially how much we are bombarded by negative body images from all fronts. having been through what i have and doing what i do, i'm extremely conscious of it, and i can't even bear to watch tv anymore in large part because i'm tired of seeing how weight watchers isn't a diet (it is, and it reads like a pro-ana site sometimes) and how subway's version of being healthy includes telling myself i'll be fat, miserable, and lose my self-worth and my boyfriend if i eat a cheeseburger.

there are a lot of reasons why i am eating disordered, and it is definitely a neurotic glitch - but our society creates a hotbed for those glitches to grow, too. recovering is so difficult in part because it's not cool to be healthy and not want to talk about fixing your body or getting thinner or whatever. women especially talk about food and weight all the freaking time together, even between strangers. i hate that.

respectfully,
annabelle.


_____________________________

a'ishah (the artist formerly known as annabelle)
i have the kind of beauty that moves...

(in reply to Kalista07)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/30/2008 6:37:26 PM   
fluffyswitch


Posts: 1108
Joined: 9/29/2007
From: Buffalo
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: plantlady64

If you truly submit yourself to him your eating and weight should be his will to decide.



i haven't read all the thread but my immediate though respectful reaction to this--if OP's already been diagnosed then her master BETTER be a registered dietician or other highly educated individual in a related field, otherwise this could do serious damage to her system. there are some things in IMH(respectful)O that go above and beyond simply saying well he's your master so you need to follow his will just in order to 'truly' submit.


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Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Eating Disorders vs Obeying. - 1/31/2008 4:25:08 AM   
dawndewdropbaby


Posts: 37
Joined: 1/29/2005
Status: offline 		' just stopping' was the words I used, it was a weaning process off of food. Either way it was my choice I chose not to eat cause I was fat. It was a dumb decision.

(in reply to fluffyswitch)
Profile   Post #: 60
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