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Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 9:36:12 AM

KatyLied

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I've been thinking about this lately. In my view, bisexuality is on a spectrum. With people defining themselves somewhere along the spectrum. I've had bisexual experiences, in my teens, but none as an adult. Some of my fantasies go there, often in a "being dom'd into it" type of scenario. I identify as straight, and I seek out a member of the opposite sex first. But a more true identity would probably find me somewhere between bi-curious and bisexual. I'm trying to figure out how you define yourself as bisexual, is it by experience? Is it by where your mind goes when you see an attractive member of the same sex? Is it because sometimes you like to play with members of the same sex?

< Message edited by KatyLied -- 11/17/2005 9:37:18 AM >

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RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 9:40:23 AM

thetammyjo

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Joined: 9/8/2005
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I'm scene bisexual -- I've scened with, trained, and enjoyed female submissives and masochists.

I've never had sexual contact with another woman.

I can and do have fantasies where I own and use female slaves as I do male ones so it could turn me on but only in the context of a Ds or ownership relationship.

Then again, that is the primary turn on for me period. I consider being a dominant sadist my primary sexual orientation.

Straight is a secondary orientation -- I've never done a double-take to check out another woman but I certainly do that for men when I see them.

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(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 2

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 9:44:54 AM

KittenWithaTwist

Posts: 490
Joined: 8/3/2005
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I have never had full on sex with a woman. But, I know I'm bisexual. I've scened with women in the past, both as a top and as a bottom. And I'm attracted to women, both those on tv or walking by, and those I interact with. Generally speaking, I'm more prone to check out a hot girl rather than a hot guy.

I'm also attracted to women (and men) in vanilla and "scene" settings.

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RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 9:56:20 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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Joined: 10/25/2005
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This is my view of bisexuality:

love men<10-----------------0>no desire for men

love women<10-----------------0>no desire for women

We have TWO spectrums. We can be anywhere along EITHER spectrum.

Personally I'm about a 9 for men and a 5 for women.

I think this dual-spectrum approach works because it allows people to see things in multi-dimensions and keeps things clarified. If you're just starting out in thinking about bisexuality, this can help organize your thoughts.

However, even this approach is too simplified, because human relationships are complex. How I deal with women is VERY different than how I deal with men. I see them differently, I have different experiences with them.

What matters is how you feel oriented. If you only meet one person in your life that turns you on completely, does that make you bisexual? I'd say yes you are bisexual, but if you don't define yourself like that, then it's no big deal.

Whether it's play or sex depends on how play or sex helps define yourself as a whole.

As usual, it comes down to what you feel oriented towards. I've always been attracted to relationships with males and females. However, I'm far more experienced with males and am much more likely to be attrached to a male immediately versus a female who takes much more time.

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 4

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 10:24:37 AM

Quivver

Posts: 1953
Joined: 11/27/2004
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I've *termed* myself Bi....
Like Lucky and yourself I prefer Men.
I'm selective with men, more so with women.
If I had to choose one or the other, I'll take men.
Thing is I'm not Poly.... unless your talking *play*
I'll share my Toy's but when it comes down to it, there my Toys!

hope that helps

Q

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RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 10:29:49 AM

sunshine333

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Joined: 8/16/2005
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i am 100%, absolutely, positively, no doubt about it very bisexual!

... grins ...

i am in a relationship with a Man now but can't imagine going the rest of my life never again being with a woman. i like and desire both genders for different reasons. i've never met a man who could meet my needs emotionally as well as a woman. and i've never met a woman who can meet my physical needs in the same way a man can. i love the size and strength of a man ... and the softness and beauty of a woman. i enjoy the brutality and force that a man can give ... and the tenderness and emotional connection that i get with a woman.

greedy slave,
~sunshine

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 6

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 10:48:58 AM

RosaB

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Joined: 1/10/2005
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I wouldn't say at the moment I'm bisexual. I do like that scale approach, I'd probably fall somewhere at a 2 or 3.

Its funny, because I've been thinking a lot about that these days and more so since attending a private play party this past weekend. There were a number of bisexual young women in attendance and I had done something, nothing major, wrong that night and one of the ladies jokingly spanked me on my bottom when I had turned to move, she was extremely apologetic once she realized what she did. But I found her charming and have thought about how it might really have been fun to take her over my knee later that night. That is of course something she hinted at. I think that was her purpose to begin with. The little brat.

But the point is, I was attracted to her, not really in a sexual way, but in a way of wanting to top her. I've over the last few months encountered a few other women that I've thought of possibly topping and I have to say, I did get a little tingle when I thought about it. Time will tell if I'll actually go there. Can't be any worse than topping a man that is wearing a dress.

Rosa

< Message edited by RosaB -- 11/17/2005 10:50:38 AM >

(in reply to sunshine333)

Post #: 7

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 10:49:32 AM

DominaJade

Posts: 25
Joined: 10/13/2005
From: Montreal
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshine333

i am in a relationship with a Man now but can't imagine going the rest of my life never again being with a woman. i like and desire both genders for different reasons. i've never met a man who could meet my needs emotionally as well as a woman. and i've never met a woman who can meet my physical needs in the same way a man can. i love the size and strength of a man ... and the softness and beauty of a woman. i enjoy the brutality and force that a man can give ... and the tenderness and emotional connection that i get with a woman

I ditto that. I find myself to be attracted to both sex. We are in an open relationship (Actually I am the one who's open ended) and I see other females as I choose. Most of the time it's for friendship and light flirting but the door is always open for more.

Domina Jade

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RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 11:30:09 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
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Thank you for the responses.

ES - I especially like the idea of two spectrums, it's a bit easier to see where I fall there.

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- Albert Einstein

(in reply to DominaJade)

Post #: 9

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 12:06:37 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
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I'm not bisexual, because to me identifying as "bisexual" implies there are only -two- genders to be attracted to. I think that's pretty much being prooved false every day.

I don't know if I could break it down into a spectrum. I think for me it's a scale as to how high gender figures on your attraction scale. That is, how important is an individuals gender in whether or not you are interested in them. I put gender in the same kind of scale as...say...hair color, skin color, various personality traits etc.

One ranks how important these elements are in one's attraction to other people. For me, gender is fairly incendental. I find I'm am more likely to be attracted to individuals with other spesific personality traits (for example, being pationate about books) more than the gender of the individual bearing those traits.

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~in the begining it is always dark~

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Post #: 10

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 12:11:20 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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Joined: 10/25/2005
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Is it just me or were you like purposefully spelling badly here??? :)

quote:

ORIGINAL: perverseangelic
incendental.

incidental

quote:

spesific

specific

quote:

pationate

passionate

(in reply to perverseangelic)

Post #: 11

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 12:16:12 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
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Nah, I just can't spell, never could. Nearly got me "held back" in several grades, because they assumed anyone who spelled as badly as I couldn't read.

Bit of a sore spot with me, actually.

On the net, I figure 's informal enough for me not to worry about it. Formal papers ALWAYS go to a proof reader.

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

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Post #: 12

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 12:20:57 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: perverseangelic
Bit of a sore spot with me, actually.

kisses and makes it better

(in reply to perverseangelic)

Post #: 13

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 12:23:08 PM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

Hey, let's focus.....
this thread is about mememe and my confusion.

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“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 14

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 12:28:04 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied
Hey, let's focus.....
this thread is about mememe and my confusion.

Yes your confusion about BISEXUALITY. You got one girl kissin another girl, a LIVE CYBER example. You should be paying me royalties or something.

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 15

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 12:29:36 PM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

quote:

You should be paying me royalties or something.

Or something???

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

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Post #: 16

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 12:31:11 PM

Wildfleurs

Posts: 1650
Joined: 9/24/2004
From: Connecticut
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

I've been thinking about this lately. In my view, bisexuality is on a spectrum. With people defining themselves somewhere along the spectrum. I've had bisexual experiences, in my teens, but none as an adult. Some of my fantasies go there, often in a "being dom'd into it" type of scenario. I identify as straight, and I seek out a member of the opposite sex first. But a more true identity would probably find me somewhere between bi-curious and bisexual. I'm trying to figure out how you define yourself as bisexual, is it by experience? Is it by where your mind goes when you see an attractive member of the same sex? Is it because sometimes you like to play with members of the same sex?

I define myself as bisexual based on experience largely. Before then I guess I considered myself potentially bisexual but not entirely sure. My experiences and preferences are for casual sexual and play types of relationships with toppy/dominant women. I have heard some people say that you can only be bisexual if you desire a relationship/have equal desire for both genders. For me its all defined by sexual desire not relationship desires.

C~

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The heart of it all - http://www.wildfleurs.com
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(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 17

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 12:32:11 PM

Oumae

Posts: 911
Joined: 1/4/2005
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This came up before on another thread and the term het. flexible was used and I liked it.
I don't tend to look at a woman and go phoarr but sometimes with some flirting an interest can develop. Its fun to play with both too.

Oumae

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Is cuma le fear na mbrog ca leagann se a chos.
( The man with the boots does not mind where he places his foot)

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 18

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 12:45:04 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: perverseangelic
Bit of a sore spot with me, actually.

kisses and makes it better

:) Sorry I got testy. It -is- a sore spot, y'think I'd spell check stuff rather than be a butthead, but...I'm also apathetic ;)

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

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Post #: 19

RE: Bisexuality - 11/17/2005 12:55:04 PM

slavejali

Posts: 2918
Status: offline

Ive had sex with women when my male partner was involved and it was really hot. Ive lived with a woman in relationship for about 6 months but discovered i really didnt enjoy the day to day sexual relations, it really wasnt floating my boat, i felt like i was making love to myself, the erotic and energetic dymanic just wasnt there for me.

Does this define me as not a lesbian but bi? Ive thought about that. I dont think im even bi. The hotness of being with another woman was the entertainment factor i was providing for my partner, so it was his enjoyment that was the crux for me.

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 20

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