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Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 10:51:53 AM   
Slavesun


Posts: 10
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline 		I am looking to try a heavy CP session with a pro Domme in which she uses CP to bring me to tears.

I was thinking I'd like to be brought to tears as quickly as possible however I am inexperienced in this and am not sure wether it is wise to go from 0-99 without a warm up. Would you say I need to warm up first? If so, why?

Is it viable to start a session full bore, or is there a reason why I shouldnt?

Please let me know, I am curious as I try and piece together the session I'd like to have in my head. Thanks.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 11:00:39 AM   
RumpusParable


Posts: 1923
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
Status: offline 		If you're inexperienced, I'd likely not be expecting to be brought to tears first session.  Might happen, might not.  But warmup is going to be very much a part of it.

Hell, I could probably hit you once and bring you to tears, anyone could really, from sheer pain reaction... but I doubt that would satisfy what you're craving.

If you're inexperienced, you're working with a theory of what you might be able to take or enjoy -both physically and emotionally.  I'd strongly urge going to someone that will work you up to it, carefully, over a single long session (if it turns out you can take it and enjoy it and everything goes smoothly... or you crack early, for that matter) or over a series of sessions where you get a feel for each other and get the experience you need to know what's right for you in this and *then* go there if you still wish with someone you've built a rapport with.

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(in reply to Slavesun)
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RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 11:27:13 AM   
Slavesun


Posts: 10
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline 		The CP part of being brought to tears is more a vehicle than something I hope to enjoy.

The point of tears is meant to be a pathway and beginning point for other things in the session.

I've tried a session like this before and the problem looking back was the safeword. Any respectable pro Domme when presented with the safeword will stop. I used it as soon as it started really hurting and this I think is where the problem lies. At the time in ignorance I put it down to the Mistress being weak. Not true. She was doing her job and respecting the safeword as she should.

A thought I have in mind for the session is to have a series of 10 no holds barred hits without a safeword after using a safeword and getting a short break.

My thoughts are that I need to be pushed through what I will accept at the moment. Operating without a safeword is not an option at all, but having a block of 10 hits with no safeword will help me be pushed through the barrier, get a feel for real torture but it will be over in a short time.

(in reply to RumpusParable)
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RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 12:05:12 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		I would have a serious problem with hearing a safeword and not stopping.  That could be very dangerous and could present complications of many types.  Once a safeword has been used, I see it as many things, but also... the lack of consent to go further.  It means stop and you cannot give it new meaning!  That is like the little boy that cried wolf in my mind.  You might go with a word that means... okay... I think I am at or close to my limit, but continue so we can find out and then use the safeword to stop it as it should be used and done.

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(in reply to Slavesun)
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RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 12:14:45 PM   
Slavesun


Posts: 10
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline 		To clarify, everytime I use a safeword the session would stop. Then a block of so many hits.

For the block I'd have a gag, so I wouldnt be able to use a safeword however that block would be short.

This idea allows my limits to be pushed in a controlled way.

(in reply to Lockit)
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RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 12:25:59 PM   
hopelessfool


Posts: 988
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		slavesun why not use the red yellow green set
where when you say yellow (at the time of regular safeword) it means your close to the edge but want to be pushed further and red means stop fully.

It gives you the ability to be pushed as well as remaining in a safe environment


< Message edited by hopelessfool -- 8/1/2008 12:33:22 PM >

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RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 12:28:17 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		That's quite the fantasy you have going there. 

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RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 12:35:40 PM   
Coupleofwhats


Posts: 280
Joined: 6/4/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Slavesun

I am looking to try a heavy CP session with a pro Domme in which she uses CP to bring me to tears.

I was thinking I'd like to be brought to tears as quickly as possible however I am inexperienced in this and am not sure wether it is wise to go from 0-99 without a warm up. Would you say I need to warm up first? If so, why?

Is it viable to start a session full bore, or is there a reason why I shouldnt?

Please let me know, I am curious as I try and piece together the session I'd like to have in my head. Thanks.



I don't think that you can instruct someone to bring you to the point of tears.... at least not in the way that you might want it to happen. I'm assuming that you're looking to get some sort of emotional release that you can't achieve otherwise (many people, particularly male people, have a difficult time letting go and allowing themseves to cry.)

I would suggest that you do this sort of session with a Pro that you've gotten to know over time. Personally, when people approach me with this sort of thing, I tend to refuse them. I need to have a feel for someone, their tolerance and reactions before limits are pushed.

Also, if having it happen as quickly as possible is the goal... I'd wonder if visiting a Pro is worth it? Paying several hundred dollars for ten minutes seems a tad silly.

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RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 12:53:43 PM   
shadowcd


Posts: 88
Joined: 6/23/2008
Status: offline 		I would think it would depend the reasons why you are in tears..  from shear physical pain or is the cp a trigger for an emotional release.      I can't say I'm experienced in this matter however explaining your reasons for the scene to me are far more important then the actual details in achieving it. 

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 1:18:29 PM   
MsJssk


Posts: 67
Joined: 3/28/2008
From: Austin, Texas
Status: offline 		Let me understand here. Does CP stand for corporal punishment. And are we then talking about spankings? If so, I do not understand why a warm up is nessisary. I mean, if someone wants it cold, it's not like penial penetration where you need to start small and be very very careful.

Getting past the issue of "reding" as soon as things hurt is a problem. For this, you may have to develope a strong relationship with someone. It may take several sessions and lots of aftertalk between the sessions to build the kind of trust you are talking about. I think you are basically asking to have a Dom that can read your limits and thus you can trust them enough to know they will read correctly... to eliminate your desire to red so quickly. That takes time.

MsJ

(in reply to shadowcd)
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RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 4:37:57 PM   
MamaDomme1


Posts: 377
Joined: 1/12/2008
Status: offline 		~~FR~~

I don't feel there is a need for a "warm-up" with a spanking, especially one in which the recipient is wishing to be brought to tears as quickly as possible.

I do have a serious problem with him wanting to safeword out so often.  One time with the safeword, session ends. 

(in reply to MsJssk)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 4:51:10 PM   
mstrj69


Posts: 295
Joined: 5/27/2004
Status: offline 		Warm ups are good to help keep permanent marks from occuring.  Having read this far, I would have to agree it is better to go with someone the op is familiar with and who knows the op and has an idea when to stop even without the use of a safeword.  Going from one pro to another all the time winds up with their never learning you.  They can never know when they are going too far and thus have to trust on the use of the safeword. 

(in reply to MamaDomme1)
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RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 5:04:39 PM   
MsJssk


Posts: 67
Joined: 3/28/2008
From: Austin, Texas
Status: offline 		I felt like the original poster's issue was that he reds before he really wants to. It's like the bottom that screams "you better fucking stop you bastard," but would be very disappointed if the Top really stopped. I can think of two possible solutions to the problem. Maybe one will work, maybe neither. Hell, maybe my perception of the problem is all wrong. First, come up with another means of telling the Top that you are hurting and scared, without telling her that you want to stop. It can be as simple as saying, "stop bitch." No matter how much you say "stop" it's not likely that a Top will stop. The second idea is to come up with a different safe word and see if you're more likely to avoid using it. I assume that you've been using "red" for your safe word. After a while, we get used to the word red and it comes out a lot easier than we intend it to. So, come up with something different. Something that you will be less likely to say unless you really want the scene to end.

Some other ideas you can try: negociate that a red will end the scene for 5 or 10 minutes. If after that time you are ready to start again, then you start again. Some above said to utilize the all powerful "yellow." I stress yellow a lot more in my play sessions than red.

But what it might all boil down to is self-control and discipline. Do you have enough discipline to get what you claim to desire. You have to be willing to accept it. You have to be willing to that the jump and take what you want. Dominants, especially ones you don't know well, are only going to go so far in the forced play arena. You have to meet them part of the way. You have to want it bad enough to go through with it and not change your mind.

I don't know if you can get into truely forced play in a professional relationship or even in casual play. After six years I am only just beginning to be able to truely force things on my dearest.

MsJ

(in reply to MamaDomme1)
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RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 5:42:38 PM   
Politesub53


Posts: 14862
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MamaDomme1

~~FR~~

I don't feel there is a need for a "warm-up" with a spanking, especially one in which the recipient is wishing to be brought to tears as quickly as possible.

I do have a serious problem with him wanting to safeword out so often.  One time with the safeword, session ends. 


Hi Ma`am, i think we should be allowed to use a safeword, so You can fetch us a cold beer.

P S.... Am i learning ?

(in reply to MamaDomme1)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 5:51:38 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Lockit knows what to do with cold beer... hehe

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 6:05:37 PM   
pixelslave


Posts: 1444
Joined: 8/19/2006
Status: offline 		I agree with hopeless fool who suggested the use of the yellow, green and red safeword system.  That being said, it sounds as though you may be searching for a cathartic release.  That isn't always easily found unless you're able to discuss this with your domme and fully open to exposing yourself and your emotions to her.  There aren't always the easy shortcuts you may be seeking to an emotional healing through this lifestyle and BDSM.
 
 - pixel
 


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RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 6:34:30 PM   
Politesub53


Posts: 14862
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

Lockit knows what to do with cold beer... hehe


Hopefully drink it Ma`am, anything else is plain wrong.

(in reply to Lockit)
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RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/1/2008 7:40:32 PM   
MsStarlett


Posts: 1879
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline 		Oh!  I thought you wanted me to shake it up and shove it where the sun don't shine for a lovely foamy enema.  

_____________________________

It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed,
the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning,
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.

(in reply to Politesub53)
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RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/2/2008 12:47:40 AM   
Politesub53


Posts: 14862
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

Oh!  I thought you wanted me to shake it up and shove it where the sun don't shine for a lovely foamy enema.  


A whole new meaning to " On for the road" then Ma`am.

(in reply to MsStarlett)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Heavy CP session question - 8/2/2008 9:03:30 AM   
Slavesun


Posts: 10
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hopelessfool

slavesun why not use the red yellow green set
where when you say yellow (at the time of regular safeword) it means your close to the edge but want to be pushed further and red means stop fully.

It gives you the ability to be pushed as well as remaining in a safe environment



Good idea.

(in reply to hopelessfool)
Profile   Post #: 20
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