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RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 1:19:40 PM   
azropedntied


Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline 		Lets hope the OP has learned from this, and  now  knows her current, absent for a year and a half Masters info at the very least .It just boggles my core that someone can say things like  he is my EX but i dont know his last name , where he lives , or other basic info  in this day and age . Why would you want to be on the 5 and 6 Oclock news ...
Anyway to the OP you have been given good advice learn from this , and go forth and do what needs to be done  no excuses .

(in reply to KyttynTheMynx)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 1:21:25 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		Well.. excuse me for saying.. duh.  Your master has been gone for a year and a half and this other guy has been persistant the whole time.  You have responded.  You made that choice.  Maybe you responded because your master has been gone a year and a half.  Do you really want this other guy to stop trying?  Or are you keeping his hope alive by answering so that you can feel irreplaceable?
Kyst
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sub03
My Master has been gone for a year and a half. Yes he has been persistent the whole time. He is relentless and just dosen't give up.

(in reply to Sub03)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 1:26:15 PM   
akisha


Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline 		never mind  

< Message edited by akisha -- 8/5/2008 1:32:37 PM >

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(in reply to Sub03)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 1:33:57 PM   
Sub03


Posts: 600
Joined: 4/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: azropedntied

Lets hope the OP has learned from this, and  now  knows her current, absent for a year and a half Masters info at the very least .It just boggles my core that someone can say things like  he is my EX but i dont know his last name , where he lives , or other basic info  in this day and age . Why would you want to be on the 5 and 6 Oclock news ...
Anyway to the OP you have been given good advice learn from this , and go forth and do what needs to be done  no excuses .



No need to get nasty. Yes in fact I do know my current Master's first and last name, social security number, address and birthdate.....is there anything I'm missing??

I never said I made a smart choice with my ex which is why he is my EX. And I have been trying to follow the advice given. Did I even once disagree with any of the advice?? I said that ignoring his calls dosent work. I have been trying to do that. I will have to find out how to block his number on my cell phone. Someone said you cant do that with t-mobile though.

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(in reply to azropedntied)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 1:35:42 PM   
Bstardsbitch


Posts: 154
Joined: 11/19/2005
Status: offline 		Call me cynical......but...seems to me like your Master has been away a year and a half, the ex has been relentless and as your Master is due back in 6 weeks or so, now you're asking for advice  on how to get rid of him......hmmmmm
Like I said, call me cynical.
x

(in reply to akisha)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 1:39:02 PM   
Sub03


Posts: 600
Joined: 4/30/2005
Status: offline 		Yes I want it taken care of now, I want it fixed so he dosen't have to deal with it when he gets back. I dont want him to clean up my mess.

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Profile   Post #: 46
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 1:39:18 PM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		You can't make someone let go. They have to be willing to let go. You for your part just have to not do things that encourage contact like talking to him if he calls or when you see him out and about an he tries to talk to you.

Don't see him don't talk to him do not answer his emails or his calls. Tell him once to leave you alone or you'll call the cops and then after that cease being a willing participant in contact. Block his number, change yours, block his im name ect ect.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sub03

How do you get an ex to let go who refuses too? I have an ex who knows I am taken and knows that there is no chance of anything happening between us and yet he just wont stop trying. To be completely honest something did happen once after we broke up and I will always regret that bad choice, but I refuse to let something happen again and I know he thinks he can get me to change my mind.  I tried just breaking off contact but he won't stop calling me and texting me, he calls me at least twice a day everyday for the past week and a half. I finally broke down and talked to him today but he just won't accept that it's over, he tries to turn all my arguements around to his way of thinking. The obvious easy answer is to have my Master talk to him but my Master is away right now so he can't take care of it like he would like too. And Him being away is part of the reason my ex won't leave me alone.....he figures with my Master gone now is his chance. I don't know what to do anymore.....ignoring him dosent work, talking to him dosen't work....any ideas?? Helpful advice??

(in reply to Sub03)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 1:42:39 PM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sub03

Yes I want it taken care of now, I want it fixed so he dosen't have to deal with it when he gets back. I dont want him to clean up my mess.




well you know what to do ...

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(in reply to Sub03)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 1:42:51 PM   
Bstardsbitch


Posts: 154
Joined: 11/19/2005
Status: offline 		Why should he clear up your mess?
Seems to me that for a year and a half you have responded to your ex and now your Master is due home you want him gone.

Still cynical
x

(in reply to YourhandMyAss)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 1:51:34 PM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline 		I have to wonder if this "mess" was actually a "problem" for the last year and a half during his incarceration. The only reason I can see such behavior continuing is because it was allowed to....and the only reason I can see for allowing it to is because it was filling some purpose. I do hope that your Master is aware that this "mess" has been going on all this time....because if not it is one of those kind of things that won't be easy to keep hidden. And I would think that if that is the case there is going to end up being one pissed off Master in the near future.

< Message edited by mistoferin -- 8/5/2008 1:53:21 PM >

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~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

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(in reply to Bstardsbitch)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 1:52:06 PM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		Well then keep your doors and window's locked, if he has a key change the locks, don't answer the door if he does show up and call the cops. You really are making it a bigger thing than it has to be. Sure it's a pain if he shows up but easily delt with if you don't let him in.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sub03
He won't take no for an answer and ignoring him just makes him call me more. I just don't want him to show up on my doorstep demanding to know why I haven't answered his emails or calls. I know he is fully capable of doing just that.

(in reply to Sub03)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 2:01:34 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

I said that ignoring his calls dosent work.


Why doesn't this work?
Why do you allow him to control you?
You can easily ignore his calls and delete his messages unread/unheard.
I would not get a new phone number because I wouldn't want to give an ex that sort of power over me.



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(in reply to YourhandMyAss)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 2:08:35 PM   
Sub03


Posts: 600
Joined: 4/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

I said that ignoring his calls dosent work.


Why doesn't this work?
Why do you allow him to control you?
You can easily ignore his calls and delete his messages unread/unheard.
I would not get a new phone number because I wouldn't want to give an ex that sort of power over me.




At the risk of being accused of beating a dead horse.....

Ignoring his calls dosen't work because it just makes him call more and more. I mean two or three calls a day everyday lately is seriously excessive. I'm not trying to let him control me and I don't plan on talking to him again. I talked to him once to try and get him to understand that it was over and that nothing was going to happen.

_____________________________

owned by painarranger

I am His loyal slave

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 2:10:29 PM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline 		*bangs head off desk*

email me your bloody cell number ... and his ... will have the problem dealt with in like 5 minutes

why are you resisting this solution? ... sounds like you have a vested interest in remaining a victim


_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to Sub03)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 2:10:45 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		When was the last time you had contact with him?  When did you answer a call, a text, an email?

_____________________________



(in reply to Sub03)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 2:11:26 PM   
azropedntied


Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline 		I am far from being " nasty" This is a wake up call , you asked for help and yes you did disagree with advice given , example  you thought it too much trouble to change your #.
At any rate  the beating a dead horse has been posted .
good luck .
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sub03

quote:

ORIGINAL: azropedntied

Lets hope the OP has learned from this, and  now  knows her current, absent for a year and a half Masters info at the very least .It just boggles my core that someone can say things like  he is my EX but i dont know his last name , where he lives , or other basic info  in this day and age . Why would you want to be on the 5 and 6 Oclock news ...
Anyway to the OP you have been given good advice learn from this , and go forth and do what needs to be done  no excuses .



No need to get nasty. Yes in fact I do know my current Master's first and last name, social security number, address and birthdate.....is there anything I'm missing??

I never said I made a smart choice with my ex which is why he is my EX. And I have been trying to follow the advice given. Did I even once disagree with any of the advice?? I said that ignoring his calls dosent work. I have been trying to do that. I will have to find out how to block his number on my cell phone. Someone said you cant do that with t-mobile though.

(in reply to Sub03)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 2:11:38 PM   
sublizzie


Posts: 1252
Joined: 5/26/2004
Status: offline 		There is always a flurry of activity before someone gives up. Don't answer any of the calls and they *will* stop. If you don't feed it, it will go away or die.

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(in reply to Sub03)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 2:16:46 PM   
phoenixrising43


Posts: 51
Joined: 6/11/2008
Status: offline 		Very good point!

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 2:30:08 PM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sub03
Ignoring his calls dosen't work because it just makes him call more and more. I mean two or three calls a day everyday lately is seriously excessive. I'm not trying to let him control me and I don't plan on talking to him again. I talked to him once to try and get him to understand that it was over and that nothing was going to happen.


I'm sorry but I could understand if this had been going on for a few days...or a few weeks. But you said that he has been this persistent for a year and a half. That tells me that it really hasn't been a problem for you for that time frame. That maybe even you were enjoying the attention of his pursuit of you. But it's panic time now because your Master is being released and now you NEED him gone because even though it wasn't a problem for you, it WILL be a problem to your Master.



_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to Sub03)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: How do you get your ex to let go?? - 8/5/2008 2:35:45 PM   
IvyMorgan


Posts: 729
Joined: 7/5/2007
From: Midlands, UK
Status: offline 		I had a stalker ex, we were friends and it went sour, we were never in a relationship.  At one point, he was calling 3 or 4 times an hour.  He'd call, I'd not answer, he'd call again, and again, and again.  I set up a special ring tone just for him, ignored the phone everytime that ringtone rang (I have TMobile, see, there's always a way).  I blocked his emails/msn.  I stopped using the same websites as him.  I moved home shortly after, so he didn't have my landline, but whilst he did, housemates would answer the phone and I always made excuses not to talk to him.

I did a happy dance when he moved to Prague, but he still kept calling.  I kept ignoring.

Eventually, and I do mean eventaully, it worked.  He still calls and gets in contact from time to time.  I keep ignoring.

There is no "trying to ignore him" either you are, or you aren't, and if you aren't, you're perpetuating the problem.

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 60
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