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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 5:39:13 AM

impishlilhellcat

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Shadow-tiger

Once upon a time I used to believe in happily ever afters. I even thought I'd found it for a while, but that didn't work. Now the question isn't so much whether or not I yet believe, rather do I have the courage to try and find one?

In the end life is what we make of it, as is our happiness or lack of.

I like that the courage to try and find one...

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 5:45:53 AM

purepleasure

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I believe in usually happy ever after. There are bound to be moments that aren't happy, but with patience and perseverance to make the relationship work, ever after can be forever.

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 5:48:29 AM

BRNaughtyAngel

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Some great responses! Thank you all.

*sprinkles some happily ever after dust on everyone*

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 5:52:11 AM

DiurnalVampire

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I absolutely believe in happily ever after. I dont think that means no problems ever, nor do I think that means that once you start on the "ever after" part you just let it go on its own and hope. I do, however, believe that the one you are with for your happily ever after makes the difference. I am not going to say there wont be fights, and you might now doubt how you feel, but overall you wil be happy with the person... for ever after.

At least, thats how I am hoping it goes. So far so good.

DV

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 5:52:18 AM

sirsholly

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*sneezes*

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 5:55:40 AM

BRNaughtyAngel

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

*sneezes*

Bless you. Need a tissue?

Come on holly...... was the sneeze your answer?

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 5:57:15 AM

BRNaughtyAngel

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Oh and just in case anyone else sneezes from the happily ever after fairy dust, it's hypo-allergenic happily ever after fairy dust.

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 6:01:07 AM

sirsholly

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BRNaughtyAngel

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

*sneezes*

Bless you. Need a tissue?

Come on holly...... was the sneeze your answer?

no...i just need to stay up wind the next time you pitch the happy dust.

My answer to this thread...yes i do believe in happy ever after, but more on an individual basis than as a couple. My happiness is up to me and it really has nothing to do with my surroundings. It has to do with my attitude.

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 6:05:38 AM

natasha66

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I believe in "happy right now", and that's good enough for me.

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 6:25:13 AM

cjan

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Happily ever after need not be a fairey tale, either for a couple, a poly situation or a single person. But, "happily ever after" is built and maintained one day, one choice at a time. The challenge is to cultivate awareness and, hopefully, as a result, to go against the stream of bad habits and self-defeating thinking and behaviors that stand in the way of happiness. The trap is, always, falling asleep at the wheel.

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 6:35:27 AM

Gwynvyd

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Shadow-tiger

Once upon a time I used to believe in happily ever afters. I even thought I'd found it for a while, but that didn't work. Now the question isn't so much whether or not I yet believe, rather do I have the courage to try and find one?

In the end life is what we make of it, as is our happiness or lack of.

I have to echo these seniments...

I had found my happily ever after... I was *insanely* happy for a time. ~ had found my soulmate. However it all fell down. My advice to everyone has always been~ we each make our own happiness and our own misery. Even this being said sometimes I can not pull myself out of the one and into the other...

Having had that much bliss and happiness I fear ( and fear is the right word here) that I will never find it again with another. I honestly do not know if I can summon up the courage to love like that again. Or even if there is any one out there that is right for me left in this big huge world.... what if we only get one shot and he was it?

It was a huge blessing to have loved and been loved like that. I had held back my whole life for just that moment. ( It is why I am unmarried after all these years and suitors) I waited for him. I realize so many people will never have that in thier lives.. and I should be happy I got to feel it. ~ and I am... However it hurts now that there is that huge empty space in my life and in my heart. I know what it is like. It is akin to tasting the forbidden fruit.. and not being allowed to have it again. ~ or having only one glimpse at the moon in your life.. and never seeing it again.

I want to seek it out again.. I am just afraid it will never happen.. or I will pass the chances by in my fear of being hurt again.

Gwyn,
being painfuly honest this morning...

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 6:37:23 AM

camille65

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Totally yes, I believe in that. However it isn't something I will find with someone, it is something inside of me. I will live happily ever after with myself.

Prolly sounds stupid but thats where I am right now, finding that out.

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 6:39:54 AM

BRNaughtyAngel

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quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

Totally yes, I believe in that. However it isn't something I will find with someone, it is something inside of me. I will live happily ever after with myself.

Prolly sounds stupid but thats where I am right now, finding that out.

Doesn't sound stupid at all camille!

I think that if we cannot find some sort of happiness within and with ourselves, we'll never find it walking a life path with another person or persons.

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 6:40:19 AM

Evility

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Yes, I do believe in happily ever after. It does indeed happen... just not very often and only to a fortunate few. As Don Henley once said "I don't know why fortune smiles on some and lets the rest go free".

I'm glad I am one of the lucky ones.

< Message edited by Evility -- 8/17/2008 6:41:52 AM >

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 6:50:40 AM

lusciouslips19

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Maybe, but love has its peaks and valleys.
This got me thinking about a question I was operating from and was searching for the answer when I left my marriage..

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2075331/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm#2075331

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 7:10:33 AM

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I know, for a fact, that love can last a lifetime. Does that translate into "happily ever after"? For a lucky few, yes.

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 7:13:05 AM

SL4V3M4YB3

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People have such short memories, I only have to say one word: Bambi.

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 7:25:58 AM

BRNaughtyAngel

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It's interesting that most of us have equated happily ever after with love, most likely because we see love as being an integral part of the equation.

Yet we know from the forums that there are quite a few people who don't have or want love in their relationships, and are quite content with that.

Lushy posted about passion. Because we're all so different and have walked different paths in life, that in itself makes our "happily ever afters" just as different. For some, it might just be that they are content in their life, and they don't necessarily need passion or love or (fill in the blank).

I started this thread just because I found that movie "Enchanted" to be enjoyably cute. It poked fun at the notion of happily ever after, and made the very valid point that our perception of "happily ever after" is ever-changing based on our past experiences and our current circumstances. Maybe for some, happily ever after is elusive because they are so set in stone about what they want and need for it to happen?

I'm glad I started this thread and have been quite pleased with the responses, and I'm grateful to those, like the beautiful Gwyn, who shared their anguish. Many hugs for you beautiful lady!

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 7:31:04 AM

lusciouslips19

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BRNaughtyAngel

It's interesting that most of us have equated happily ever after with love, most likely because we see love as being an integral part of the equation.

Yet we know from the forums that there are quite a few people who don't have or want love in their relationships, and are quite content with that.

Lushy posted about passion. Because we're all so different and have walked different paths in life, that in itself makes our "happily ever afters" just as different. For some, it might just be that they are content in their life, and they don't necessarily need passion or love or (fill in the blank).

I started this thread just because I found that movie "Enchanted" to be enjoyably cute. It poked fun at the notion of happily ever after, and made the very valid point that our perception of "happily ever after" is ever-changing based on our past experiences and our current circumstances. Maybe for some, happily ever after is elusive because they are so set in stone about what they want and need for it to happen?

I'm glad I started this thread and have been quite pleased with the responses, and I'm grateful to those, like the beautiful Gwyn, who shared their anguish. Many hugs for you beautiful lady!

This is such a wonderful point. I think my happily ever after is depended upon my growth and realizations of what I need. After I left my marriage to a "complimentary opposite." Well, we really had nothing in common and no shared hobbies or enjoyments to bind us. There ended up being eventually nothing to talk about. We ended up like roommates and not lovers. I realized that perhaps I needed someone who had shared hobbies and interests. Things that we did together outside of only passion. I also realized that the men I was afraid of when younger,the more manly, macho and slightly misogynist, might be the man that was right for me.

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RE: Do you believe in.......? - 8/17/2008 7:41:46 AM

NuevaVida

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quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

Totally yes, I believe in that. However it isn't something I will find with someone, it is something inside of me. I will live happily ever after with myself.

Prolly sounds stupid but thats where I am right now, finding that out.

Doesn't sound stupid at all, and, in fact, it is the conclusion I have come to. Much like what Gwynvyd wrote, I thought I had found it with someone else. I'm not sure I'll ever love like that again - ever. I realize now, however, that Happily Ever After exists within me, because, like it or not, I'm the only one guaranteed to be with me for the rest of my life! And I am determined to make it a good life.

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