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Looove??? - 8/21/2008 11:04:06 PM   
Stechinye


Posts: 7
Joined: 8/21/2008
Status: offline 		So most of us have clear distinctions beteen love and play on this website. 
I have met a man who was the typical Dom/Master..not too extremem but definatly perverted.

After we have been in communication for many Months...he nw feels love for me..and has said directly, I loveyou, I don't see you as a sex object or a person to control.  I see you as a mate.

Has anyone had an experience similar to this?  Enlighten me.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Looove??? - 8/21/2008 11:19:47 PM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline 		What... are you saying people are so simple minded they can't have a D/s relationship with someone they love?

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Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Looove??? - 8/21/2008 11:25:15 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		Umm.... I have experience with a man saying that he loves me while flogging my ass off. Does that count?

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Stechinye)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Looove??? - 8/21/2008 11:41:47 PM   
susie


Posts: 1699
Joined: 11/21/2004
Status: offline 		I first told my Master I loved him while still chained to the bed following one of the worst beatings he has given me. He told me he loved me one walking along the beach.

We are still together 4 years later and happier than ever. I have helped him start a business and he has nursed me through skin cancer and recently a brain tumour. We are both in love and very happy. During this time he has been and always will be my Master. That has not changed.

susie

< Message edited by susie -- 8/21/2008 11:43:50 PM >

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Looove??? - 8/21/2008 11:49:20 PM   
Stechinye


Posts: 7
Joined: 8/21/2008
Status: offline 		Well..our mental connecion is what we are going on here...we haven't met..were to have met but things didn't work out...
Now we are recomitted..and he feels thesame way...
I can't even get him to broach the subjects of dominance and slavery like he had before..
He loves me and I am hs mate...but should i expect that those previous tendencies are gone?  or modified?

(in reply to susie)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 12:03:35 AM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline 		Personally, I try to wait at least until I've met the guy before the L word. O.o

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RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 12:07:30 AM   
susie


Posts: 1699
Joined: 11/21/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stechinye

Well..our mental connecion is what we are going on here...we haven't met..were to have met but things didn't work out...
Now we are recomitted..and he feels thesame way...
I can't even get him to broach the subjects of dominance and slavery like he had before..
He loves me and I am hs mate...but should i expect that those previous tendencies are gone?  or modified?


I may be old but how on earth can you even consider saying "I love you" without even meeting someone. It would set off all sorts of alarm bells with me.

(in reply to Stechinye)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 12:07:47 AM   
Owner4SexSlave


Posts: 1311
Joined: 4/4/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz
What... are you saying people are so simple minded they can't have a D/s relationship with someone they love?


I believe that's the bottom line.  Sad is it not? 

(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 12:15:55 AM   
Stechinye


Posts: 7
Joined: 8/21/2008
Status: offline 		I agree with Susie..

I guess, persoanlly, love is found int he mind and the menta aspects and dynamics.
Sex doens't seem like a HUGE factor for me.

It is for him, but now he is wlling to change his prefrences that he previousy held...for me..
That creeps me out.

(in reply to Owner4SexSlave)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 12:40:21 AM   
E2Sweet


Posts: 649
Joined: 7/8/2008
From: TopLeftCornerOf, OH, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stechinye

...we haven't met..were to have met but things didn't work out...


OK, I'm not an expert but I do have some experience with this (several long stories), but what I can't help but believe is happening is that he is falling in love with his own perception of you that he internally connects to your voice (via phone) or your written words (via chat). That's pretty-much how this sort of online/phone thing works. I can only suggest, based on what I have learned, and have been told over the years, is to hold off on going farther down that road until you actually do meet and see just what is real and what is/was fantasy in terms of your perceptions of one another.

Often times people's personalities really do come through online and genuine chemistry seems to exist, and I've found that more often that not, the person I end up meeting is indeed very much like the perception I initially had of her. But there are always differences and such... and sometimes the differences are huge issues...

So yea, its very very early to be dropping the infamous L-bomb... That's all I can say...

Best of luck!


_____________________________

E2Sweet™
"If it doesn't make you smile then chances are you're not doing it right."

(in reply to Stechinye)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 12:46:05 AM   
atypicalsub


Posts: 284
Joined: 4/11/2008
From: an atypical sub
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stechinye

I may be old but how on earth can you even consider saying "I love you" without even meeting someone. It would set off all sorts of alarm bells with me.


Not long ago I would have agreed with this 100%.  That was until I fell in love with my Mistress over the phone before we were able to meet.  We started with the D/s, but the more we talked the more we found we connected on many different levels and subjects.   I knew I was in love with her before I ever felt her touch.

_____________________________

Polyamorous, solitary eclectic pagan, pansexual slut, and personal pet of MistressYes

"Do not do anything you are ashamed of, and don't be ashamed of anything you do"
(although I'm sure my bio-family wishes I did less and was ashamed of more)


(in reply to susie)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 1:28:56 AM   
Paulnz


Posts: 411
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: E2Sweet

quote:

ORIGINAL: Stechinye

...we haven't met..were to have met but things didn't work out...


OK, I'm not an expert but I do have some experience with this (several long stories), but what I can't help but believe is happening is that he is falling in love with his own perception of you that he internally connects to your voice (via phone) or your written words (via chat).



That's what I think too. IMO people have to actually meet. Online or over the phone can establish rapport but then find that when meeting in person the chemistry is just not there. Then the opposite can occur, people who think they'd never like one another can meet and hit if off immediately.


(in reply to E2Sweet)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 1:32:38 AM   
Juliannadelion


Posts: 869
Joined: 7/25/2008
From: circusofthedamned
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stechinye

So most of us have clear distinctions beteen love and play on this website. 
I have met a man who was the typical Dom/Master..not too extremem but definatly perverted.

After we have been in communication for many Months...he nw feels love for me..and has said directly, I loveyou, I don't see you as a sex object or a person to control.  I see you as a mate.

Has anyone had an experience similar to this?  Enlighten me.


I knew I loved my Lord and Master the very first time we spoke.  Our relationship defies all reason and rational thought.  I am his slave, as well as his friend, lusty busty wench, companion and partner in crime.  His love for me, did not override his desire to hurt and dominate me for pleasure.

I can only offer this:  Gamble everything for love, it is the only sure bet.  <3




To Please and be Pleasing, to Him.  Always, in All ways.

(in reply to Stechinye)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 2:24:21 AM   
batshalom


Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline 		Since you haven't met each other, he is merely stating that he loves what he knows of you. It probably happens a lot (not with him specifically - I mean people in general who meet over the Internet).

If you aren't comfortable with the whole deal, tell him. If you don't want to be a mate without the D/s, explain it to him. There's no need to let it continue if there's no hope for it, there's no need to be something less than honest simply to spare his feelings.

(in reply to Stechinye)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 4:23:03 AM   
SoulPiercer


Posts: 374
Joined: 5/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: susie
I may be old but how on earth can you even consider saying "I love you" without even meeting someone. It would set off all sorts of alarm bells with me.


Am I the only person here who watches Oprah to learn what goes on inside the male, (and in a lot of cases, the female) brain?

They haven't met .. but he says "I love you"..

The romantic notion is .. "He's in love with the idea of you".

The reality is - He knows .. as long he keeps saying "I love you", you'll keep hanging around waiting for him to take his jammies off and get out from behind the keyboard.

Cynical? Yes. Based on the sad reality of the way a great many people behave? Another yes.

_____________________________

Do you have any idea how many bones you have left for me to break? - Batman

(in reply to susie)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 4:26:40 AM   
naturalsin


Posts: 92
Joined: 6/24/2008
Status: offline 		wrong thread! sorry

< Message edited by naturalsin -- 8/22/2008 5:12:57 AM >

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sinful

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RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 4:57:08 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stechinye
It is for him, but now he is wlling to change his prefrences that he previousy held...for me..
That creeps me out.


That doesn't creep Me out, look around these board you will find MANY examples of that kind of thing.... usualy someone trying to be something they are not IMO.

For Me, When I Own a girl, I am drawn to control her BECAUSE I start to care, not in spite of it. The more I care, the more control I want. I am wired as a Dominant it is how My caring expresses itself.

I don't 'get' these who stop being able to control or 'play' with a girl just because they develop feelings for her. To Me it indicates that being Dominant isn't something they ARE, mearly something they try and do.... YMMV.


_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to Stechinye)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 4:58:14 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

They haven't met .. but he says "I love you"..

The romantic notion is .. "He's in love with the idea of you".

The reality is - He knows .. as long he keeps saying "I love you", you'll keep hanging around waiting for him to take his jammies off and get out from behind the keyboard.

Cynical? Yes. Based on the sad reality of the way a great many people behave? Another yes.

I have to agree with this.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to SoulPiercer)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 5:20:08 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		I love all of you women. I will say the same for the guys if they hand me a cold beer. Op he will tell you he loves you until you try to get him to meet you.

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Looove??? - 8/22/2008 6:43:20 AM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stechinye

So most of us have clear distinctions beteen love and play on this website. 
I have met a man who was the typical Dom/Master..not too extremem but definatly perverted.

After we have been in communication for many Months...he nw feels love for me..and has said directly, I loveyou, I don't see you as a sex object or a person to control.  I see you as a mate.

Has anyone had an experience similar to this?  Enlighten me.


I have to see someone as long term useful to define them as a possible "mate".

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to Stechinye)
Profile   Post #: 20
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