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Odd question... - 8/23/2008 2:38:14 PM

theUnsung

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i often hear that submissives/slaves have an automatic instinct as to whom is their master/dominant, that gut feeling.

is or does this occur with dominants/masters as well?

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 2:40:41 PM

NeedingMore220

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I don't know if it's an automatic instinct I have towards who is my Master ... I think it's more a chemical reaction between two people, and it just feels right - which I think would be felt on either side of the slash.

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 2:42:29 PM

BKSir

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I would have to say 'yes'. I know when I met my pet, I had NO intention of having one for a while (long story, bad experience, needed time off), and was most certainly NOT looking. And then, I saw him across a room, and instantly, something in my head clicked on, saying "That is mine." This was just a bar as well, not a play party, not even a bdsm bar... Just a normal bar. And over a year later... My gut instinct was right. I couldn't imagine a better pet, or being without him by my side and at my feet.

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 3:08:23 PM

GreedyTop

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*warm fuzzies from BKs post*

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 4:01:56 PM

littlewonder

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I don't. For me it's a process. It takes time for me to figure out who I want to be with. Then again I'm not one who jumps headfirst into much of anything.

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 4:07:18 PM

kiwisub12

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I didn't know right away that my Sir was right. It actually took a bit of talking to enable me to see that I could see a relationship with him, and then a few months to fall in love with him ( i was a bit "once bitten, twice shy").

I guess that makes me not a sub?

Now, if you were asking if i felt that he could be my master, as in the feeling of authority, I would have said yes. Within a few minutes of conversation i felt that he was someone i could submit to. \

He tells me that he knew right away that he would enjoy having me as his sub. Of course, i think it was my silver hair and cute accent that did him in.lol.

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 4:13:23 PM

IrishMist

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quote:

ORIGINAL: theUnsung

i often hear that submissives/slaves have an automatic instinct as to whom is their master/dominant, that gut feeling.

is or does this occur with dominants/masters as well?

I react instinctively to certain type of men, yes; but it has nothing to do with whether they are of a Dominant personality or not

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 4:14:08 PM

celticlord2112

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quote:

ORIGINAL: theUnsung

i often hear that submissives/slaves have an automatic instinct as to whom is their master/dominant, that gut feeling.

is or does this occur with dominants/masters as well?

Not sure it qualifies as an instinct, but the first time I met my slave in person, my "gut feeling" was "I want her, I mean to have her."

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 4:24:34 PM

BKSir

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Jeebus! Twice in one day Celticlord? O.o
Hold on, I think I need to re-read the book of Revelations. This just ain't right. ;)

All kidding aside though, as I said before, of course I believe it's possible, and maybe even somewhat common. BUT, I should clarify, it's most likely not the norm. For someone to clique like that literally instantly, is indeed a very unusual thing. If it happens, great! Don't expect it though.

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 4:28:20 PM

celticlord2112

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quote:

Hold on, I think I need to re-read the book of Revelations. This just ain't right. ;)

Nah, just put on those extra woolen socks. The icicles are starting to form in Hell.

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 5:11:21 PM

ShiftedJewel

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BKSir

Jeebus! Twice in one day Celticlord? O.o
Hold on, I think I need to re-read the book of Revelations. This just ain't right. ;)

All kidding aside though, as I said before, of course I believe it's possible, and maybe even somewhat common. BUT, I should clarify, it's most likely not the norm. For someone to clique like that literally instantly, is indeed a very unusual thing. If it happens, great! Don't expect it though.

I don't know how uncommon it is. I knew when I met my husband almost immediately that he was it for me. We went on three dates then moved in together. Within six months we had each others names tattoed on us. He proposed, I accepted and we were married literally the day after his divorce was final. We met twice online, talked for a while through IM and on the phone, then she flew out here from Oregon and she knew within the first few seconds of seeing us. Gypsy came for a visit and wanted to meet in a public place (smart girl!) so we did, we met in the parking lot of a local restaurant... She said ok and followed us home. Stayed for a week then went back to NY to tie up loose ends... she'll be here tomorrow.

I think it's something that happens a lot, but so many people don't hear their gut speaking to them or don't trust their initial instinct. Just my opinion.

Jewel

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 5:15:28 PM

BKSir

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Hm, I think you make a good point there, about people not listening to their gut, following their instincts. Been doing it so long, that sometimes it's easy to forget that some people don't. Many, probably. They should, it's often correct, that's why it's there... to keep us from screwing up as bad, as often. ;)

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 7:43:55 PM

califsue

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I think everyone has the ability to listen to their own instinct regarding many things and lots of time we turn it off. The first time I met Master I knew it could be so much more but I told him No. Two years later and now I am ready and agree, and thank goodness he is still interested, we are slowly taking the steps as he doesn't want me to run again.

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 9:50:51 PM

Leatherist

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No.

My armor is too thick-I need to know someone first.

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 9:52:03 PM

AMaster

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Not me.

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RE: Odd question... - 8/23/2008 9:53:40 PM

DiurnalVampire

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Yes and no.
I have known right away AFTER meeting someone that I wante them no questions asked. Worked that way with both the boys. However, before meeting them, I would never even think to say "That is mine, I must have it." becasue that would be working on looks, not personality and I can live without looks, but I cannot live without personality.

DV

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RE: Odd question... - 8/24/2008 8:36:45 AM

leadership527

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Myself and mine had great chemisty when we met. But I shun all the overly romantic dramatization that like to crop up in the BDSM community. She isn't "THE ONE"... she's just a wonderful woman that I met and married. My domly instincts didn't tell me jack about her. We just liked each other and talked, then talked more. Gosh, it's just two people here, nothing special to look at.. move along.

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RE: Odd question... - 8/24/2008 8:38:50 AM

colouredin

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Well yes and no, i do tend to decide instantly that someone right for me, and normally it makes for a really passionate relationship complete with a really passionate break up

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RE: Odd question... - 8/24/2008 9:02:32 AM

MamaDomme1

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~~FR~~

A week ago I would have said nope, not for me. Can't say that anymore. I recently met someone from here that just blew my socks right off. Came out of left field somewhere... sure wasn't ready for that! We had talked online and on the phone several times, and then the opportunity for a visit just happened totally unplanned...
The click between the two of us was pretty spectacular.... and immediate. Not sure that we will see each other again any time soon-- or even within a year or so because of work issues and such, but damned! I want that person to be mine...... even forever like!

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RE: Odd question... - 8/24/2008 12:16:47 PM

katie978

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I'm far too cynical to believe in "the one". Of course, when I met my Master and realized he was relatively sane and trustworthy, yes, I knew I could have a long-term relationship with him. However, that was more based on physical and mental attraction and similar lifestyles than any magic kismet.

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