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RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/24/2008 2:01:28 PM

Politesub53

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Racquelle

It surprises me that in a medium that is so clearly verbal, there come to be so many who can barely express themselves verbally. A simple typo or mispelling won't spell doom, but making no effort at all to string together a well-communicated sentiment is a problem. Illiteracy is a hard limit. For an adult native-English speaker who is not otherwise learning disabled, I expect at least an attempt at effective communication. Anything less doesn't show me much respect. Worse than not making the effort at correct grammar and spelling, however, is having nothing compelling to say at all.

i`m glad you don`t mind people mispelling misspelling Ma`am

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Post #: 41

RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/24/2008 2:07:27 PM

DarkSteven

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quote:

ORIGINAL: E2Sweet

Well, spelling and grammar mistakes do tend to affect my level of interest in the writer, but I really only shy away if the profile is really bad.

Also, if the Domme does in fact state that spelling and grammar counts when contacting her, and her profile is a spelling and grammar mine field, then I'm even more put off, as I 'm not all that interested in someone that cannot or will not hold them selves to the same standard as a potential submissive. Those profiles make me shudder a bit...

I think the worst profile faux pas that really puts me off is gratuitous profanity. Dommes that write those "If you're not this or that then kindly just f**k off" type of messages in their profiles usually land in my hidden profiles list. I can understand frustration in using a site like this to find serious minded potential submissives, but that's just over the line. What ever happened to maintaining some level of dignity?...

I just wanted to mention that I have the same issues as a male Dom, with female submissives. I expect a certain level of class.

Also, spelling/grammatical mistakes bug me more than they should. Is the person a clear thinker who cannot express herself, or a muddled thinker?

I just have to close by giving a PM I got on Literotica from a barely literate Dom who had asked for intelligent subs in an ad, whom I had gently lectured about the importance of grammar and spelling:

Considering all the programs to compensate for poor spelling and punctuation ...being good at those things really isn't special or noteworthy anymore ...especially against the backdrop of the world giving in to ebonics style texting on cell phones ....its apparently more hip and cool not to spell correctly ...lol how strange and ironic that texting has destroyed the english language....btw add the punctuation yourself lol

And yes, he WAS young!

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Post #: 42

RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/24/2008 2:30:06 PM

DesFIP

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The Man has multiple degrees but all in math and engineering. One of the things I do for him is proof read letters. Legibility and clarity of thought matter more to me than typos or small grammar errors.

But I wasn't looking for someone who made their living with words such as journalists, authors, marketing, advertising etc. I don't do well with those types. I feel safer with someone who is hands on; someone who can fix the water pump so it will make it for a few more days until the plumber can get here; or can fix the garage door after the beginner driver drove into it. And typos or not knowing whether a comma or a semicolon is appropriate has very little to do with those skills.

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Post #: 43

RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/24/2008 2:52:26 PM

RCdc

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You just like what you like - that isn't TFB or OCD.
People who pronounce 'domme' as though it were french, or insist on me calling them anything than their name would strike them from my to know list. Also close minded people who think it is funny to deride others with so called wit when they own enough shit of their own. And liars. And lazy people.

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Post #: 44

RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/24/2008 2:54:50 PM

maat

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Personaly, if i corrected every post i wrote i wouldent be able to write a singel post in the end. English is not my native tongue, im from Sweden. AND to make mathers even more interesting im also dyslexic so no, i dont hold bad gramer or bad spelling against someone cuz you never know why the spelling isent perfect and behind those misspelled words there might be a fantastic person.

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Post #: 45

RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/24/2008 3:11:05 PM

YourhandMyAss

Posts: 5516
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How about trying Dominant Female? Or Fem Dom, or Dominatrix, or how about asking the person you're contacting what THEY personally want to be addressed as?

quote:

ORIGINAL: E2Sweet

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

....you use the word "domme." I hate that word and anyone who uses it I would immediately put into my "not interested" pile. Maybe it seems silly to you, but it's not to me and since I'm the one who gets to decide, then that's what happens.

Interesting. I'm curious as to what term could be substituted that would not land someone in the 'not interested' pile?... I ask because, honestly, the more I search here and learn, the more confused I seem to become...

Sorry for the mini hijack.

< Message edited by YourhandMyAss -- 8/24/2008 3:12:23 PM >

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Post #: 46

RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/24/2008 5:52:13 PM

E2Sweet

Posts: 649
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

...Is the person a clear thinker who cannot express herself, or a muddled thinker?

Indeed. I just want to add I'm not a all a "Ha ha, you spelled this or that wrong, I'm not gonna talk to you anymore" kind of a person. But, in searching for someone, I do look for a good all-around communicator, and someone who is not lazy in life, and the approach that a person takes to his or her profile here is a good indication of that sort of thing.

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss
How about trying Dominant Female? Or Fem Dom, or Dominatrix, or how about asking the person you're contacting what THEY personally want to be addressed as?

Indeed all those seem fine to me, though my initial question was more related to alternative ways to address female dominants within the forums and such here... before one-on-one communication was established. I thought perhaps there was a change in the norm that I was not aware of... I just never imagined the term "Domme" would be offensive to anyone.

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Post #: 47

RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/24/2008 7:12:22 PM

RedMagic1

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"Domme" is an internet creation/bastardization. Frankly, LA is the only person I know who has it as that strong a pet peeve, but yes a lot of women prefer the term "dominant." After all, if Angelina Joilie is an "actor"....

But, hell, the term "BDSM" is a usenet creation, and only dates back to 1991. I just can't get too worked up over what people call things. I care what people *do*.

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Post #: 48

RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/24/2008 9:56:55 PM

DeeDeeDoll69

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Bad grammar isn't only insanely annoying when done by people trying to set up an aura of power and intellect, it basically makes anyone look like a tool. If it's online, I understand acronyms and short-hand, but when you mess up "scene" with "seen" or something else you learn in the 4th grade, you really shouldn't be on a site like this. Or alive. :)

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Post #: 49

RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/25/2008 3:57:54 AM

Evility

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I believe I once read this quote in these very forums: "Grammar is like showering. Anyone can do it but those who don't seem to be the ones who get offended that it makes a difference."

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Post #: 50

RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/25/2008 4:47:35 AM

lally3

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im not a great speller myself and some people suffer from things like dyslexia or cant type.

but, if i get a badly written, chucked together, unthougt owt, badley put toogether stringe of werds it puts me of.

its usually when people get the of and off's wrong - their and there's, to and too's that i get all nerdy about it. and when theyve written a short hello but not bothered to check it, so you get realy instead of really or something like that - if they cant make an effort on the little things it makes me wonder if theyll make the effort over all.

have to admit, ive never bothered to find out.

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RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/25/2008 4:55:13 AM

DelightnDevotion

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-Fr-

Yes, I admit it, spelling and grammar make a difference to me. A few errors aren't going to put me off, but repeated ones...yes, that will cause me to question whether we would be compatible. And if you make an error such that I end up laughing myself silly, well, that doesn't bode well at all for being able to perceive you as the Dom of my dreams. This morning I read a profile from a Dom who said he wanted to see me have "forced organisms".

Umm.....okay...I'm envisioning a Fear Factor bug eating kind of thing...

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Post #: 52

RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/25/2008 6:48:38 PM

Racquelle

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Politesub53

quote:

ORIGINAL: Racquelle...

i`m glad you don`t mind people mispelling misspelling Ma`am

No matter how you spell it, I dislike being called "Ma'am". "Ma'am" is what store clerks call old ladies. I am a sweet young thing, and I will be, even when I am 80.

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Post #: 53

RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/26/2008 1:15:36 AM

Politesub53

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Racquelle

quote:

ORIGINAL: Politesub53

quote:

ORIGINAL: Racquelle...

i`m glad you don`t mind people mispelling misspelling Ma`am

No matter how you spell it, I dislike being called "Ma'am". "Ma'am" is what store clerks call old ladies. I am a sweet young thing, and I will be, even when I am 80.

I always use Ma`am, out of politeness, unless given another term to use. How could anyone ever argue, that You are anything but a sweet young thing is beyond me. Even if i did make an unintened error.

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Post #: 54

RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/26/2008 9:46:47 AM

IvyMorgan

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I used to be awful at spelling. I couldn't spell at all at age eight, and was in high school before I got of/off and does/dose sorted in my head. As a prolific reader, this confused the heck out of my teachers. I still get vowels confused semifrequently.

I will admit to judging people based on how they write. This in part includes spelling and grammar, but also the general tone, vocabulary used, ideas expressed and so on. We're on the internet for chrissakes, all I have to go on is the characters on a monitor, I have to judge you based on *something*, and I'd far rather it be what you typed that what your profile pic looks like.

I do like people who send to memos correcting your spelling of obscure words, and saying the fact that you used it correctly but spelled it wrong makes you look stupid. Whilst spelling the "five dollar" word they chose to use as a synonym for "stupid" incorrectly.

I use "long" words. I just do. They express the ideas in my head the way I want them expressed. I use them in my day to day conversation, I use them in my personal journal, I use them when talking to kids, much to the displeasure of my mother, but my theory is, they'll learn the words if I use them, and will understand them based on context or they can ask, the kids I talk to like this aren't stupid, and I'd far rather talk "up" to them than patronise. I also use foreign words, even when other people don't understand them, because they express the ideas I want expressed best. If I'm talking in person, this will be accompanined by much hand waggling in explaination. My hands do not waggle over the internet, so I tend to ditch the "meaningless" words. There's no point talking if people don't understand you.

I have an affinity for words beginning with the letter "p". For some reason, I use a lot of them. I've no idea why.

People who have "pet words", weird random words they looked up in a thesaurus one time and think make them look smart and that they therefore use in everything they write ever, even if it doesn't fit and has to be worked in, annoy me. It smacks of trying too hard. And always makes me giggle when I read the word.

As long as you make sense and I don't have to work overly hard to understand you, I'm fine. Though *constantly* making the same *simple* errors drives me batty. Like people who value "intelligent discussion" and can't spell intelligence (I think I have a journal about that one). Dyslexia is not an excuse for constantly screwing up the same word over and over and over. If you *use* it three times a sentence, because it's an important concept for you, ffs make a post it and stick it to the monitor.

/rant

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RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/26/2008 5:59:32 PM

sblady

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Initially, I was horrified by some of the messages I received. Now I've learned to keep an open mind. As long as I can comprehend what the other person is saying, I respond. I'm sure the person is already being ridiculed by others so I try to be understanding as they may have undiagnosed issues. Additionally, some of the inner city or urban schools didn't stress the importance of the written word and just shuffled kids through the system. As I'm the product of said "system" and know I'm not always grammatically correct in my correspondence, it would be pretty silly for me to pick on someone else.

I abhor net speak. Even in chatrooms, I tend to write out the entire word unless I'm telling someone brb, etc.

< Message edited by sblady -- 8/26/2008 6:00:46 PM >

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RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/26/2008 6:40:58 PM

Lynnxz

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I suppose if the only thing someone can hold against me is my spelling, I must be doing something right.

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RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/26/2008 7:03:37 PM

subtee

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I isn't goin be Kompatible wit a people that cain't spell gud. Butt, if theys be smurt other then dat, we b ok

speshally i am whorny

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RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/26/2008 10:52:09 PM

Leatherist

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veeblefetzer.

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RE: Grammar and spelling? - 8/27/2008 1:00:42 AM

Sundowner

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DeeDeeDoll69

Bad grammar isn't only insanely annoying when done by people trying to set up an aura of power and intellect, it basically makes anyone look like a tool. If it's online, I understand acronyms and short-hand, but when you mess up "scene" with "seen" or something else you learn in the 4th grade, you really shouldn't be on a site like this. Or alive. :)

*tacklehugs DDD* (as a grammarian)

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Post #: 60