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Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 1:55:41 AM

HardToTame

Posts: 205
Joined: 3/30/2008
Status: offline

Ok, so, I havent seen whats going on for a while, and so I click on, and theres the whole "whose viewing you" thing. Now, I'm sitting there hoping some hot domme is getting her rocks off over my profile and shit, so I click. WHAT THE HELL! ..

Theres all these half naked guys viewing me. What gives? All these, prissy little 'look at my abs' kinda guys trying to show their shit off to the ladies (or men as it would appear) as if they're hot shit?

Tell me.. Do you women like that shit? Am I on the wrong road or something? If I put up a photo of myself trying to show off what I don't have will I get all sexy mistresses dieing to use me like a cow girl at a rodeo? (Gross overstatements, but you know what I mean?)

Post #: 1

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 7:34:58 AM

MsIncontrol

Posts: 261
Joined: 10/3/2007
Status: offline

I think you are right. Most of the male profiles on this site...whether or not that are trying to attract men...show the male perspective. All of the shirtless wonders..as I call them. I am the first to admit I am not a super model...but if your abs look like you have drank one too many 6 packs..and not the 6 pack themselves...keep your shirt on. I am not an expert on women, but as a woman myself, I do not really care to see a bunch of nude photos in someone's profile. All of the torso shots crack me up....and I just shake my head and say what were you thinking. I can appreciate a fine specimin....believe me....I don't mind the photos of half naked sexy men...but if that is how you are presenting yourself...as the ONLY photo or all the photos are similar it makes me think you are primarily looking for sex...and have no idea how most women's (at least me) minds work.

Yes, women are visual creatures...but when I see a profile and the only photo is of a headless naked torso...it does nothing for me. I prefer a face shot (when possible), a full body photo (doesn't even have to be close up) and a picture showing something about your lifestyle...then if you want to have a shirtless torso pic...all the better.

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Post #: 2

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 7:43:38 AM

AAkasha

Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsIncontrol

I think you are right. Most of the male profiles on this site...whether or not that are trying to attract men...show the male perspective. All of the shirtless wonders..as I call them. I am the first to admit I am not a super model...but if your abs look like you have drank one too many 6 packs..and not the 6 pack themselves...keep your shirt on. I am not an expert on women, but as a woman myself, I do not really care to see a bunch of nude photos in someone's profile. All of the torso shots crack me up....and I just shake my head and say what were you thinking. I can appreciate a fine specimin....believe me....I don't mind the photos of half naked sexy men...but if that is how you are presenting yourself...as the ONLY photo or all the photos are similar it makes me think you are primarily looking for sex...and have no idea how most women's (at least me) minds work.

Yes, women are visual creatures...but when I see a profile and the only photo is of a headless naked torso...it does nothing for me. I prefer a face shot (when possible), a full body photo (doesn't even have to be close up) and a picture showing something about your lifestyle...then if you want to have a shirtless torso pic...all the better.

Random body shots don't do it for me either. If a man has to only show one part of him and wants to attract women, my suggestion is to go with the eyes. Do other women agree?

Especially if he has long eyelashes.

Akasha

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(in reply to MsIncontrol)

Post #: 3

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 7:47:46 AM

Madame4a

Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline

ok.. I'm totally into looking at the shirtless wonders.. but beyond that, I'm not really interested. And I find myself thinking, where is the face shot, please?

Its a type.. and it attracts a type... different strokes *heh* and all that...

< Message edited by Madame4a -- 8/29/2008 7:48:10 AM >

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Post #: 4

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 8:43:07 AM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

The thing with random body shots is that they can be ANYONE'S body! I enjoy looking at them, certainly (the really cool kilt one, has anyone seen that?) but until I see a face, I am not that interested.

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Post #: 5

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 9:00:03 AM

aidan

Posts: 904
Joined: 5/28/2005
Status: offline

While shirless-with-no-head pics are kinda lame, yes, but he didn't say it was those kind of pics specifically, just shirtless men.

I dunno, I have a few shirtless pictures up. And I've looked at a guy's profile out of curiosity a few times from perusing the boards.

This is part and parcel with having a public profile up on a public site. Unless you take the steps to block certain groups of people, you can't filter who does and does not view you and it's kind of weird to complain about it.

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Post #: 6

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 9:11:25 AM

UmbraDomina

Posts: 491
Joined: 7/22/2008
From: SE Michigan
Status: offline

*playing devils advocate*
Many people can not or will not show their faces on line especially on kink sites. Many people have jobs that they could or would lose if their face was out there. Many people have children who are also on line, and they don't want to risk them seeing mommy or daddy on a kink site.
If you don't have a picture on line, most people will either ignore you, or call you a fake. There for many people take pictures of part of their body, especially if it is the part of your body you feel is attractive to others.
I can use my own picture as a example.... My picture shows my legs..... I think I have decent legs, I am surely not going to take a picture of something on my body I find ugly...lol
I don't show my face on line, especially on kink sites, I value my privacy. If someone is local and wants to see my face, I attend many of our local parties and events, they can met me there, if they want to have a cup of coffee or grab some lunch if I have time, I will met them, I have met tons of friends this way.

again just playing devils advocate,

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~~ And I will show you something different from either your shadow at morning striding behind you Or your shadow at evening rising to meet you; I will show you fear in a handful of dust..... T.S. Elliot ~~

(in reply to aidan)

Post #: 7

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 9:17:51 AM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

I was not picking on those that don't show their faces, Alexandra, sorry if I came across that way!

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Post #: 8

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 9:20:13 AM

MadameMarque

Posts: 1128
Joined: 3/19/2005
Status: offline

For me, if the abs are worth flashing, then go ahead, make me think bad thoughts.

To me, the kill is a beautiful face. So, if a guy with a beautiful face has a nice, smooth torso, he's getting to me. I'm not ashamed.

If I could only have one, I'd rather a photo of a man's face. But I quite understand why many don't post that, on their profile; they can always provide it, in private contact.

(in reply to HardToTame)

Post #: 9

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 9:22:17 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

I want to lodge a complaint about all of the women who go shirtless.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Post #: 10

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 9:22:24 AM

AAkasha

Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: UmbraDomina

*playing devils advocate*
Many people can not or will not show their faces on line especially on kink sites. Many people have jobs that they could or would lose if their face was out there. Many people have children who are also on line, and they don't want to risk them seeing mommy or daddy on a kink site.
If you don't have a picture on line, most people will either ignore you, or call you a fake. There for many people take pictures of part of their body, especially if it is the part of your body you feel is attractive to others.
I can use my own picture as a example.... My picture shows my legs..... I think I have decent legs, I am surely not going to take a picture of something on my body I find ugly...lol
I don't show my face on line, especially on kink sites, I value my privacy. If someone is local and wants to see my face, I attend many of our local parties and events, they can met me there, if they want to have a cup of coffee or grab some lunch if I have time, I will met them, I have met tons of friends this way.

again just playing devils advocate,

Not to hijack, but I wonder if you are finding an increasing number of submissives who cannot get over the idea that you won't send face/private pics to them unless you plan to meet them. I found this wasn't an issue a few years ago, but nowadays, because file sharing, webcams, etc. are so prevalent, a lot of men don't want to wait and the idea of having to wait until there is chemistry makes them upset. Is this a growing issue?

I was debating back and forth recently about getting a webcam or sharing more pictures. But I have had some problems with my pictures being misused in the past and I have some stalker issues as well, and since my life isn't resting upon my image in the BDSM online community, I don't feel that disappointing a few random guys is enough motivation or need to risk my safety or privacy. Even webcam feeds can be captured and saved. I have nothing to hide about my appearance, I just don't want a million pictures of me out there.

edit to add: I do talk on the phone to any submissive I'm pursuing, and am not at all worried that people may think I'm a man or a scammer of some kind. Fortunately I think I've been around long enough that people know I'm a real person.

Akasha

< Message edited by AAkasha -- 8/29/2008 9:26:17 AM >

_____________________________

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Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to UmbraDomina)

Post #: 11

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 9:23:29 AM

kittinSol

Posts: 16926
Status: offline

It makes me laugh: if they flash their abs, it means they don't have an IQ to flash.

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Post #: 12

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 9:27:39 AM

MadameMarque

Posts: 1128
Joined: 3/19/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

I want to lodge a complaint about all of the women who go shirtless.

Fine. But when men sulk and complain and attempt to persuade that we bare ourselves again, they will be referred to one of their own, with their malcontent about sexually repressed females.

...as should so often be the case.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 13

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 9:31:26 AM

UmbraDomina

Posts: 491
Joined: 7/22/2008
From: SE Michigan
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

quote:

ORIGINAL: UmbraDomina

*playing devils advocate*
Many people can not or will not show their faces on line especially on kink sites. Many people have jobs that they could or would lose if their face was out there. Many people have children who are also on line, and they don't want to risk them seeing mommy or daddy on a kink site.
If you don't have a picture on line, most people will either ignore you, or call you a fake. There for many people take pictures of part of their body, especially if it is the part of your body you feel is attractive to others.
I can use my own picture as a example.... My picture shows my legs..... I think I have decent legs, I am surely not going to take a picture of something on my body I find ugly...lol
I don't show my face on line, especially on kink sites, I value my privacy. If someone is local and wants to see my face, I attend many of our local parties and events, they can met me there, if they want to have a cup of coffee or grab some lunch if I have time, I will met them, I have met tons of friends this way.

again just playing devils advocate,

Not to hijack, but I wonder if you are finding an increasing number of submissives who cannot get over the idea that you won't send face/private pics to them unless you plan to meet them. I found this wasn't an issue a few years ago, but nowadays, because file sharing, webcams, etc. are so prevalent, a lot of men don't want to wait and the idea of having to wait until there is chemistry makes them upset. Is this a growing issue?

I was debating back and forth recently about getting a webcam or sharing more pictures. But I have had some problems with my pictures being misused in the past and I have some stalker issues as well, and since my life isn't resting upon my image in the BDSM online community, I don't feel that disappointing a few random guys is enough motivation or need to risk my safety or privacy. Even webcam feeds can be captured and saved. I have nothing to hide about my appearance, I just don't want a million pictures of me out there.

Akasha

A few men and ladies out there have told me "well if you don't send me a picture, i won't met you" or if you won't get on webcam/share your picture, then I know your really a guy, bla bla bla" My answer is generally good luck with that, don't hold your breath waiting.....lol
If someone who is local to me isn't willing to risk a bad cup of coffee to met me then clearly they don't have a interest.
I have no problem with my looks, I am not horribly ugly, just a average looking middle aged woman. I go to events and parties, and hell in some of the outfits I wear I show alot more of me then I ever would on line....lol
yes, it has changed a bit in the last few years with tech advances it is easier to share pictures, and so more people assume you will share them.

*waves at Lady Hibiscus* I know your not picking on us faceless torso's. I really was just playing devils advocate *laughs* anyway you have seen my face and you didn't run screaming into the night.....lol

< Message edited by UmbraDomina -- 8/29/2008 9:41:14 AM >

_____________________________

Alexandra ~

~~ And I will show you something different from either your shadow at morning striding behind you Or your shadow at evening rising to meet you; I will show you fear in a handful of dust..... T.S. Elliot ~~

(in reply to AAkasha)

Post #: 14

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 9:51:50 AM

Venatrix

Posts: 2238
Joined: 11/28/2007
Status: offline

I don't mind the eye candy. But it's cerebral capacity that will get me every time.

(in reply to HardToTame)

Post #: 15

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 9:54:44 AM

Madame4a

Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol

It makes me laugh: if they flash their abs, it means they don't have an IQ to flash.

not so.. I have someone in my life with both... that said, he's not here

< Message edited by Madame4a -- 8/29/2008 9:55:02 AM >

_____________________________

You're crazy bitch
But you f*ck so good, I'm on top of it
When I dream, I'm doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

(in reply to kittinSol)

Post #: 16

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 10:18:32 AM

MistressDolly

Posts: 917
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HardToTame

Blokes who flash their abs.

All these, prissy little 'look at my abs' kinda guys trying to show their shit off to the ladies (or men as it would appear) as if they're hot shit?

Tell me.. Do you women like that shit?

Perhaps he's a submissive-bottom who feels his abs are his greatest selling point.

People do whatever works and sex sells, right.

_____________________________

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m y s p a c e

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Post #: 17

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 10:19:32 AM

dcnovice

Posts: 37282
Joined: 8/2/2006
Status: offline

<fast reply>

As a gay man with an eye candy addiction, I love those ab shots!

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it's never enough to keep up.

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Post #: 18

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 10:47:58 AM

slavejaredmtl

Posts: 15
Joined: 3/28/2007
Status: offline

whats wrong with showing your abs or great body. Hell we work out to keep it that way if you dont like it dont look

(in reply to dcnovice)

Post #: 19

RE: Blokes who flash their abs. - 8/29/2008 10:55:13 AM

Pyrrsefanie

Posts: 1222
Joined: 9/18/2007
From: NEW HAMPSHAAAAAAH!
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejaredmtl

whats wrong with showing your abs or great body. Hell we work out to keep it that way if you dont like it dont look

Because there's more to a man than just being a muscle-monkey.

Personally, I hate jocks. Hate hate hate. Sure, I love a man with a nice body, but the minute I see a guy showing off his GUNS and offering me a ticket to the GUN SHOW and the like I can't help but picture him as one of those stupid Big Moose-type jocks that I want to load into a rocket and shoot directly into the sun.

I just don't think that pure ab-shots should be the only photo up. It's okay to have one of you just kind of chilling as your main profile pic and then as many self-masturbatory shots of your pectorals as your li'l broseph heart desires. If it's a privacy thing, not wanting to show the face, then don't put a picture up. Explain in your profile you can provide pics privately. In my opinion it's better than posting pictures that make you come off as a drunken frat boy.

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Post #: 20

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