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RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/3/2008 8:03:26 PM   
MasterAramis


Posts: 279
Joined: 7/29/2008
From: Connecticut
Status: offline
quote:

IMO most teenagers are not mature enough to be a Dom/me


I would completely agree. Okay so it's making a blanket statement, but maturity and experience go hand in hand and someone of that age does not have the life experience necessary to Master themselves let alone someone else.

While I would agree that some young people are more mature for their age, it doesn't make them well equip to handle someone else.

Aramis

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/3/2008 10:38:18 PM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline 		ORIGINAL: MasterAramis

quote:

IMO most teenagers are not mature enough to be a Dom/me


I would completely agree. Okay so it's making a blanket statement, but maturity and experience go hand in hand and someone of that age does not have the life experience necessary to Master themselves let alone someone else.

While I would agree that some young people are more mature for their age, it doesn't make them well equip to handle someone else.

Aramis


You'd be surprised the amount of life you can pack into 21 years.  :P

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(in reply to MasterAramis)
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RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 1:26:26 AM   
MasterAramis


Posts: 279
Joined: 7/29/2008
From: Connecticut
Status: offline
quote:

You'd be surprised the amount of life you can pack into 21 years. :P


Hmm, why would that surprise me? At one time I was 21 too you know! LOL, still doesn't mean I would trust you with my very being.

Aramis

P.S. Very nice photos

< Message edited by MasterAramis -- 9/4/2008 1:27:20 AM >

(in reply to Lynnxz)
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RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 1:41:57 AM   
MasterAramis


Posts: 279
Joined: 7/29/2008
From: Connecticut
Status: offline
quote:

Everyone has to start somewhere or do you propose that they cannot act on their desires until age 25 at which point they will have magically acquired all necessary skills and knowledge? Were you above 18 when such desires originally hit you?


I was introduced into the lifestyle when I was 20, the fortunate thing for me is I had older and more experienced people who took me under their wing and helped me along. I do understand we all have to start somewhere to learn and it's not like there is some formal training academy to educate ourselves on how to not only Master yourself, but others. For me it's a lifelong process, but turning over control of my entire life to a person who is only barely learned how to drive a car and is under the states drinking age does not bode well for me LOL.

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 2:12:58 AM   
PrincessDonna


Posts: 189
Joined: 7/7/2006
Status: offline 		Of course a 19 or 20 yo wants to be spoiled with $$$ btu that surely doesnt mean that they are not capable of totally controlling a sub,most have been controlling men for some time and just not knowing it was topping.

(in reply to MasterAramis)
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RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 2:32:19 AM   
opposingtwilight


Posts: 684
Joined: 6/13/2008
Status: offline 		Something tells me the young dommes who are seeking money slaves aren't looking to be totally controlling a submissive's life anyway.

Wanting to be spoiled, adored, treated like a princess, have money spent on you and get away with treating a man like he's lower than a dead bug on the bottom of your shoe isn't about controlling his life. Its about being spoiled, adored, treated like a princess, being given money or presents and getting away with being a snot. There's a huge difference so unfortunately, that arguement is kind of moot.


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RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 4:06:35 AM   
MasterAramis


Posts: 279
Joined: 7/29/2008
From: Connecticut
Status: offline
quote:

totally controlling a sub


Hmm, interesting? What is the definition you are using for "totally controlling".

For me it's everything, from the sex all the way to the checkbook and everything in between. The kids, the house, job, etc.

So if a slave who for example purposes is 30, has a good job, has an ex and a couple of kids, throws itself at the mercy of a teenager of 18 - 19, do honestly think that DOM/ME, is capable of managing all that?

I doubt it very much.

Aramis

(in reply to PrincessDonna)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 4:23:39 AM   
MsStarlett


Posts: 1879
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline 		Personally, I don't know if a teen can or can't.  I'm just happy that many sub males understand that us 'fat old broads' have some really interesting tricks up our sleeves and still find that attractive. 

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It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed,
the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning,
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.

(in reply to MasterAramis)
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RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 4:53:32 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		Im to old to answer this question. Mmmmm fat old broads or fat young broads. Enney meaney minney moe.

(in reply to MsStarlett)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 5:37:35 AM   
AnnaOfAramis


Posts: 523
Joined: 7/30/2008
Status: offline
quote:

Im to old to answer this question. Mmmmm fat old broads or fat young broads. Enney meaney minney moe.


LMAO, thank you Sir, I needed a laugh!

anna

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 5:53:43 AM   
AnnaOfAramis


Posts: 523
Joined: 7/30/2008
Status: offline
quote:

I ask whether a 19 or even 22 year old has the maturity, life experience or emotional baggage to be venturing out in search of submissives. I firmly believe that someone seeking a Ds relationship, particularly in the dominant role, needs first to mature and establish self discipline and self control in her (or his) own life before venturing forth in search of that relationship and I question whether a 19 year old has reached that level, even if she thinks she has. What do you think?


I think what many young Dommes or Doms can be at that level, is really a top. To really learn to control another, well as you say, that takes life experience. It's funny, I'm a ballet dancer, and most dancers are very young. As you watch their careers, the young dancers have the technical skills and are often dazzling in their abilities, but it is the older dancers that are given the dramatic lead roles... why? Because as they mature, they are able to put their life experience into their dancing... and it shows... they are able to communicate their inner self and experience, and the real pathos behind a role, where a younger dancer misses it and the dancing is somewhat empty. And we are talking about the difference here of about ten years. So what does this have to do with D/s? Well, I think it illustrates that no matter what we may wish to believe, life experience changes us and makes us more capable of understanding things on a deeper level. There probably are some young people who may be exceptions to the rule, but I would say that overall, no they simply haven't lived long enough to experience enough. I do think that dominance is pretty much an inborn thing though...a characteristic of the individual and not something learned. So, a young person may be dominant, but they have to learn how to control that dominance within them and apply it. Eventually as they learn this, they may become a Dom/me, and with more practice and a great deal of introspection, they may even master themselves... when they have done this and have life experience, they may be ready to be a Master or Mistress.

Well wishes,

anna

(in reply to tightropes)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 6:23:00 AM   
BLKMADONA


Posts: 117
Joined: 6/11/2004
Status: offline 		I knew a thread like this was going to come along soon(if it hasn't already). My  two cents:

I think it IS about maturity and experience. Both go hand in hand...you cant have one without the other(for it to work) in this lifestyle. Im one to think outside the box(within common sense realm anyway). I will put up two ways to view this:

What if the young Dom/me was raised in that type of household. I mean as a young child,  saw mom/dad submitting(kneeling for example) in the "traditional" way of this lifestyle. With the way the world is nowadays, whose to say it is not possible that they were brought up that way. So in a sense, all they know is what and how they have been raised. What if mom took daughter and showed her in her pubesent(sp?) stages of her life on how to control and how to view males. Of course, later on(say closer to the child turning 20) she has her own mind and chooses the way she wants to view males despite the way she was taught. But lets face it, your a product of your environment 98% of the time. If she chooses to go with the way she was brought up-well, she will have the experience and maturity(in this lifestyle, if you are serious minded anyway, you have to be mature). I wish more people were, rather than having so many fake people(but thats another story so lets move on.........).


Man that was longer than I expected......and now view two:
In normal circumstances, no, I do not feel that a teenager could be a Dom/me. Hmmmm, now that I think about it, I really dont have to post it as Master Aramis pretty much says it. Not enough life experience. I, too, wouldn't(IFFFFFF I was a sub-not happening tho, but if non-the-less I was a sub) give Myself to a teenage Dom/me. Hell, I dont even date anyone under 25. Thus far My experience has been with older male subs due to the maturity level. I dont have anything against teenage Dom/mes and subs, I just feel (I feel like a vinyle record here repeating) there just isnt enough experience(and frankly 1 year dont cut it for Me personally)to give Myself.

We all gotta start somewhere, but not to the point of the blind leading the blind(a teenage Dom/me showing another teenage Dom/me). Hell, I studied a whole freakin year(reading, reading, asking questions of reputable People, and more reading) before I took on My first sub real time.

Man that was way too long, oh well.....

(in reply to AnnaOfAramis)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 6:40:30 AM   
MasterAramis


Posts: 279
Joined: 7/29/2008
From: Connecticut
Status: offline
quote:

We all gotta start somewhere, but not to the point of the blind leading the blind


That is so true!

(in reply to BLKMADONA)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 7:00:14 AM   
Venatrix


Posts: 2238
Joined: 11/28/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PrincessDonna

Of course a 19 or 20 yo wants to be spoiled with $$$ btu that surely doesnt mean that they are not capable of totally controlling a sub,most have been controlling men for some time and just not knowing it was topping.


Well, that's the crux:  the vast majority of women that young who call themselves dominant are simply interested in milking a cash cow.  There's no real dominance involved; they are simply providing a service.  If men are willing to give them money knowing that they are buying an illusion, then everyone should go away happy.   

(in reply to PrincessDonna)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 8:26:24 AM   
TwoNYCDommes


Posts: 237
Joined: 1/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tightropes
Is it possible to be a Domme at 19 years of age? 

Of course. 
My dominance did not suddenly turn on when I reached a certain age; I've been doing this sort of thing since childhood.  Naturally, my experience level has risen and my skill set explanded with time--and I can certainly understand that some submissives might place high value on these things and thus prefer older dommes--but that does not mean I was any less dominant when I was younger than I am now.

quote:

ORIGINAL: tightropes
I firmly believe that someone seeking a Ds relationship, particularly in the dominant role, needs first to mature and establish self discipline and self control in her (or his) own life before venturing forth in search of that relationship and I question whether a 19 year old has reached that level, even if she thinks she has.  What do you think?

While there may be a general correlation between age and maturity, self-discipline, etc., every person is different.  Some people are more mature as teenagers than others will be as senior citizens.

(in reply to tightropes)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 9:15:09 AM   
slaveboy291


Posts: 329
Joined: 3/5/2006
Status: offline 		Well there is such a thing as being wise beyond your years.(something some people said about me when I was younger)

It's not always how long you've been on the road(though that is a factor)

But what's happened on the road while you were travelling.

I've met 18-19yr olds who are more mature than some people 20-30yrs older than them.

So as one pointed out, it's best to look on a case-by basis rather than look at all as the same.

(in reply to silkenfire)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 10:08:49 AM   
LadyFluke


Posts: 10
Joined: 2/18/2008
Status: offline 		I am what you would call a teenage domme, but I'm well aware that I don not know how to dom a submissive like some of the fine Ladies and Gents around here. Complete control isn't something I can handle at all but we have our own way of doing things... its has worked out for well over a year with satisfaction and happiness on both ends :) I think some teens could possibly dom, but I agree with most people that we're not experianced enough. I dom my boy kinda but there's no way I could handle a full blown dommination where I control every aspect. That would just make my head explode when you add that in with college and jobs. College is important and you don't want to screw that up trying to manage another person when you can barely manage yourself. This management is a learned skill, I think, and there are probably teenagers perfectly capable of taking care of so much. I'm not so we do what we can and enjoy our playtimes.

And on the money issue: long time ago before we even started dating or even thought about D/s I demanded that we pay for things equally. Although he does like suprising me with treats every so often. There's no way I would expect for him to pay for everything... We're both just poor college students for goodness sake and I like being able to pay for myself.

I'm pretty sure some of this was too meandering, but I know no other young doms to compair myself too so I wasn't sure what to say (even though I was compelled to say something). Cheers! :)

(in reply to slaveboy291)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 11:13:05 AM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

quote:

ORIGINAL: PrincessDonna

Of course a 19 or 20 yo wants to be spoiled with $$$ btu that surely doesnt mean that they are not capable of totally controlling a sub,most have been controlling men for some time and just not knowing it was topping.


Well, that's the crux:  the vast majority of women that young who call themselves dominant are simply interested in milking a cash cow.  There's no real dominance involved; they are simply providing a service.  If men are willing to give them money knowing that they are buying an illusion, then everyone should go away happy.   


There's a difference in being a pro domme who actually has an interest in domination, and just doing it because it's fairly easy money. As for there being more younger pro dommes than older women... it's because most mens idea of a 'dominatrix' is a young woman all in leather and latex and whips galore. *shrug*

Supply and demand and all of that mess.

Do I get paid for being a pro domme? Yes. I'm not going to run around providing free service for anyone who wants to play. Does it make me a spoiled silly little whore? I'd like to think not.



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RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 11:18:45 AM   
courtneycakes


Posts: 3
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:


I think that if a 19 year old wants to declare themselves Dominant and go in search of submissives...who the fuck am I to tell them they can't?


Nice.

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Teenage Dommes? - 9/4/2008 1:48:02 PM   
silkenfire


Posts: 130
Joined: 9/27/2007
Status: offline 		Along with things a lot of people have said on here, I believe that while age is not a limiting factor, experience and their intentions are. For instance, the young dommes that wish financial submission foremost -- they are probably mostly looking for a free ride and not the other pieces that go along with it. Yet the dommes that are looking for play and experience -- they are going to grow.

Honestly, you could flip the coin the other way. How many submissive females / slave females  (even males?) are there on here that are really here for the dream of an idea that they could be a little house slave and never have to work or exist in real life, and are just doing it for an escape and the hope of finding some rich person to serve?

I believe that people putting financial situations first are a big issue. As much as I would love to not have to work full time -- I will always pull my share of the burden, unless I *completely* feel secure with enough money to retire on. And that's not happening unless I win the lottery *grins*. Among other things, relationships end, and you have to have the ability to support yourself afterwards -- a problem with many marriages ending today (not even saying lifestyle marriages).  Do I want to be a stay at home parent like mine were? Yes. Do I want to raise children in a household tight on money all the time? No. So, it's difficult to say, and I daresay I'm young enough to change my mind.

Now... I went off topic a bit...

Basically, I believe that Dommes, for all relationship purposes -- as lovers, as mistresses -- that age doesn't matter. It's the intent that matters, and I'm sure there's older women as well that look for financial slaves.  I know some older Dommes that are completely immature and unskilled in what they claim to be, and I know one that is only 11 days older than me that is very skilled in her arts and would measure up to many older Dommes in experience (I wonder what she will be like when she has more "real experience" under her belt!)... I felt the need to reply again because it appeared to me later that a lot of the complaints about younger Dommes were more towards the financial responsibility angle.

(in reply to courtneycakes)
Profile   Post #: 40
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