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RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/4/2008 10:09:16 AM   
Icarys


Posts: 5757
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

If you have to ask a bunch of strangers on the internet about a decision you should be making yourself then you have bigger issues.  Don't enter any relationship until you can think for yourself.
 
the.dark.


I think i like you.

I do feel for you but i'd agree with.. the.dark.. as well on that.

I know how much it sucks to put your hopes into something or someone and watch it fall to the side. I'm sure we can all relate.


_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/4/2008 2:21:02 PM   
RedheadedWoman


Posts: 15
Joined: 8/4/2008
Status: offline 		Its done. i told him that all of the lies and the cheating on all those woman was too much and that having a slave that he cheated on over and over vouch for him just makes things worse. Not that hes going to listen to me and i bet hes going to be writing to someone else later today if he hasnt been already. But i cant do anything about that.

i just thought id let you all know that maybe ill be writing a sad story here in six months but it wont be about him and hopefully there wont be one at all. So thanks!!!


_____________________________

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rhw

(in reply to Icarys)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/4/2008 2:26:50 PM   
CruelDesires


Posts: 824
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline 		Good for you. Now go and find someone worthy.

C-D

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Reputation is what other people know about you. Honor is what you know about yourself.
Lois McMaster Bujold, "A Civil Campaign", 1999

(in reply to RedheadedWoman)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/4/2008 2:43:27 PM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		YAYs!  Honestly, no one needs that sort of chaos energy in their life.

(in reply to CruelDesires)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/4/2008 3:46:29 PM   
Icarys


Posts: 5757
Status: offline 		As long as your happy with your decision. 

_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to RedheadedWoman)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/4/2008 3:51:58 PM   
yourMissTress


Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		Yay!  Glad you found the strength to do what you knew was right. 
 
Now, it's time for you to spend some time with you, figuring out what you are about.  So that next time you run into a Jerry Springer worthy man, you know immediately to run Forrest run, and don't need validation of your suspiscions from text on a message board.

_____________________________

Tress


"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother


(in reply to RedheadedWoman)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/4/2008 4:31:06 PM   
RedheadedWoman


Posts: 15
Joined: 8/4/2008
Status: offline 		Yeah i need to take a break and figure out why it took me so long to realize that his life is and was a mess and that all of his sweet words werent really for me since he didnt really know who i was. It was really great to have this good-looking creative guy tell me that he felt a strong connection to me but i finally figured out (with a lot of peoples help) that it wasnt me. Maybe it was my picture (which isnt on my forum but i sent him) but im not a poet or anything so it sure wasnt my words.

Its scary how easy it is to fall for that sort of thing isnt it? i dont think im broken or anything (ive worked hard to get over a really bad marriage) but he was really convincing. i was lucky that i was away on vacation for two weeks and so that gave me enough time to think and start to feel that there was something wrong but i bet someone here is goign to fall for it just like i did.

i mean its good that he told me so much about his past (tho i dont know if its true since theres no way to find out) but hell probably not tell the next woman and shell just fall for his charm.

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rhw

(in reply to yourMissTress)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/4/2008 8:10:56 PM   
RedheadedWoman


Posts: 15
Joined: 8/4/2008
Status: offline 		OMG you people were so right. i tried to end it nicely and just got an unbelievable letter back from him. i guess he needed to have the last word or something. If you want to read it, ive been putting all of our mail in a blog which i had hoped would be the start of somethign wonderful but is instead somethign very weird. Thanks again for all of your really good advice!!!

(Edited to remove the link to the blog because of what SingleRarity said.)

< Message edited by RedheadedWoman -- 9/4/2008 8:41:45 PM >

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rhw

(in reply to Icarys)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/4/2008 8:18:55 PM   
SingleRarity


Posts: 320
Joined: 9/13/2006
Status: offline 		Did you have his permission to publish those letters?  He may be liar, fake, or whatever you choose to call him, but that's personal stuff and maybe you should reconsider putting his words out there.  It makes you look like the jerk, and I don't think many will find that attractive.

P.S. If you have his permission, then kudos to you for being open, honest and willing to put your personal relationship journey out there!

Daddy's Ballerina, e

(in reply to RedheadedWoman)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/5/2008 6:16:28 AM   
RedheadedWoman


Posts: 15
Joined: 8/4/2008
Status: offline 		Next morning and your right about my not posting all of our email like you said. If anyone still cares tho here's a little from his last letter. i had a really really close escape here i think!
quote:

have tried to explain why two of the women I’ve loved are crazy, and why some others have struggled to let go. I am not like other men. I really do see the person I am with -- the woman I take – on a profound level that no other man in their lives even came close to. A huge part of my caution now is that I know this effect is real. It’s not just my ego saying “I’m so good a lover that they can’t give me up.” you are reducing it to my either having decided to be with crazy women or driving them crazy ignores what you at least caught a glimpse of: that I really am different, as a man, a lover, and a Master. you are ignoring what your mind and heart tell you about me.




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rhw

(in reply to SingleRarity)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/5/2008 6:20:37 AM   
yourMissTress


Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		Have you blocked his emails yet?

_____________________________

Tress


"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother


(in reply to RedheadedWoman)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/5/2008 6:32:26 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CruelDesires

Good for you. Now go and find someone worthy.

C-D


Uhmmm, Bad idea.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to CruelDesires)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/5/2008 7:27:23 AM   
RedheadedWoman


Posts: 15
Joined: 8/4/2008
Status: offline 		im sure hes not going to write to me again. And if he does believe me i wont be thinking about meeting him you can be sure of that. i woke up this morning and i was just so happy taht i listened to you guys and my best friend and my tehrapist. i guess his letter didnt really totally sink in last night but obviously did while iw as asleep because this morning i was sure that i had a really close call with a really crazy person. i was cring after i wrote to him because part of me was thinking tha tmaybe he really was this amazing guy and i had messed up bigtime again but i didnt give into that feeling and now im really really glad i didnt. So i guess i escaped a close call and learned a big lesson all at the same time which is really good for the next time. im still going to take a break and think about how i let him fool me for so long tho. im sure theres lots of stuff in his other email that shouldve made me realize a lot sooner so i really need to think about how i didnt see it earlier.

Thx again everyone

_____________________________

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rhw

(in reply to yourMissTress)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/5/2008 8:05:21 AM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline 		You know, I have a fairly interesting history myself...or thought I did until I read this.  While I can go along with being understanding and the idea of communicating everything, even understanding and patience have their limits.  This guy has enough baggage to sink an ocean liner to the bottom of Davy Jones Locker...and Davy Jones wouldn't have the space for it.

Perhaps he'll learn from this that it is best to leave some things in the past or to put a bit of gloss on them...he could have just as easily said "Yes, I've been involved with a few women since my divorce" and left it at that.  But in his desire to be honest, he's also revealed himself to have gone through a reckless phase (how's that for understanding?  ~s~)

I don't think I would just run if I were you...more like backing away while stating firmly "Oh, not only NO but HELL NO".

(in reply to RedheadedWoman)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/5/2008 9:39:14 AM   
LadyKatheryn


Posts: 2
Joined: 9/4/2008
Status: offline 		Red,

If you are uncomfortable with his "stories" you need not explain at all. Simply let him know that he is not the right Master for you and you hope he finds who he is looking for.  After that if he continues to push the issue it is harrassment and a block will be required.

Like others have said nothing seems to be this guys fault and the legal stuff he spewed (at least where I am from) is a load of crap.

But in the end the only one who can decide what is right for you is ultimately you.  Good Luck

Lady Katheryn

(in reply to yourMissTress)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/5/2008 10:30:14 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		LaTigresse not a bad idea. Op my name is Worthy. Pleased to meet you.

(in reply to LadyKatheryn)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/6/2008 1:25:12 AM   
L8bloomer


Posts: 480
Joined: 6/1/2008
From: Your imagination
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CruelDesires

Good for you. Now go and find someone worthy.

C-D


Easier said than done...oftentimes. :(


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Knowledge is power / Ignorance is bliss

(in reply to CruelDesires)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/6/2008 9:20:52 AM   
RealSub58


Posts: 1073
Status: offline 		Fast reply To OP
Your profile.....
Oh, gee, what to say? I'm a submissive, although not with much experience, looking for someone to teach me to serve him. I like older men, like mid 40s and 50s, not 60s! And, yeah, i gotta thing for tall guys. Just looking at them makes me feel dominated, and looking up at them towering over me when i'm on my knees is such a turn on. Guess you can call me frisky.
 
Who cares if its all true...do you want to be his next drama??  Persoanlly I think he looks for the phrase "not much experience" and knows how to reel in the unsuspecting.
 
 
Edited to add: 
ORIGINAL: RedheadedWoman
quote:  A huge part of my caution now is that I know this effect is real. It’s not just my ego saying “I’m so good a lover that they can’t give me up.” ....... you at least caught a glimpse of: that I really am different, as a man, a lover, and a Master. you are ignoring what your mind and heart tell you about me.


I have had this line used on me...
Ashmedly, I fell for it.  My life will never be the same.  He still remains "stuck" and I have joyfully moved on. 



< Message edited by RealSub58 -- 9/6/2008 9:30:04 AM >

(in reply to RedheadedWoman)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/6/2008 8:37:51 PM   
Huntertn


Posts: 715
Joined: 10/7/2006
Status: offline 		Good for you on getting rid of him...and kudds to your friend for helpin you make that decision...Huntertn

(in reply to ODadEO)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Very confused about what to do - 9/6/2008 8:42:27 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Please link the blog where you are recording the correspondence.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to Huntertn)
Profile   Post #: 80
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