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does age matter? - 10/6/2008 10:32:10 AM   
sirsblue


Posts: 5
Joined: 9/21/2008
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Howdy.

i'm not sure if this belongs here, but for lack of anywhere better to put it... and i'm sure it may have been said/asked before but because i'm 'newish' and don't feel like going through ooooollllllld posts all day i'm still gonna make mine.

here goes! *drum roll*

hehe

okay, my question to both Doms/Dommes and subs actually, does age really matter to Y/you?  
My Dom is more than twenty years my senior and I like that that way....mostly.... i could never see me submitting to someone my own age or younger than me (esp younger).  So what about Y/ya'all?  subs does it matter that the Dom is older?  Dom/Dommes should the sub be younger?
And what if there is a relationship other than the D/s one?  I know in mainly 'vanilla' ways of mind, it's a bit taboo (like we've never crossed that line before) to have a ten/fifteen/twenty/etc older boyfriend or girlfriend?  What other thoughts are out there?
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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 10:40:45 AM   
VivaciousSub


Posts: 446
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From: Tampa, FL
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I prefer older men - Sir is 8 years my senior. That doesn't really have to do with WIITWD though because I've always been friends with people older than I am. My best friend, for instance, is 13 years older than me. My mindset has always been that of someone much further down the road of life than most people my age.

My mother swears I was born at 35, which may have something to do with that!


_____________________________

9.8m/s^2 + VivaciousSub + ground = ouchx10^9th

To yield readily--easily--to the persuasion of a friend is no merit.... To yield without conviction is no compliment to the understanding of either. ~ Pride and Prejudice

(in reply to sirsblue)
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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 10:47:34 AM   
SrchngCpl73112


Posts: 47
Joined: 9/21/2008
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I also prefer older men.  My 'Daddy' is 9yrs older than me.  My ex was also older than me, that was vanilla relationship, he was 12yrs older.  Doesnt have to do with D/s or vanilla its just what i prefer.  Even though my relationship now, i wasnt even looking at all, it just happened.  I seem to attract men a little older. Which is great because 'Daddy' is awesome and just who i was looking for to spend the rest of my life with.

(in reply to VivaciousSub)
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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 10:50:22 AM   
apiercedkitty


Posts: 569
Joined: 2/22/2007
From: Michigan
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~FR~
 
i generally lean towards a few years older. i am a lil bit picky - if they're old enough to be my dad (especially if they LOOK old enough to be my dad), then they're probably older than i'm going to be attracted to.

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normal is a setting on a washing machine...

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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 10:53:15 AM   
christine1


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Joined: 12/15/2007
From: i'm headed to HIM...
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i've always had older men in my life ranging from 8 to 20 years older.  i'm now with someone 5 years younger...no, age doesn't matter, it's the person you're with that does.  i always thought my preference was for older men, i was wrong.

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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 10:53:37 AM   
winoverme


Posts: 67
Joined: 3/26/2006
From: Montreal
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsblue

Howdy.

i'm not sure if this belongs here, but for lack of anywhere better to put it... and i'm sure it may have been said/asked before but because i'm 'newish' and don't feel like going through ooooollllllld posts all day i'm still gonna make mine.

here goes! *drum roll*

hehe

okay, my question to both Doms/Dommes and subs actually, does age really matter to Y/you?  
My Dom is more than twenty years my senior and I like that that way....mostly.... i could never see me submitting to someone my own age or younger than me (esp younger).  So what about Y/ya'all?  subs does it matter that the Dom is older?  Dom/Dommes should the sub be younger?
And what if there is a relationship other than the D/s one?  I know in mainly 'vanilla' ways of mind, it's a bit taboo (like we've never crossed that line before) to have a ten/fifteen/twenty/etc older boyfriend or girlfriend?  What other thoughts are out there?

quote:

okay, my question to both Doms/Dommes and subs actually, does age really matter to Y/you?


Hello. I hope i am allowed to speak too. I am a sub? This is an interesting question. I personally have another question. I wonder if young Dommes (from 18 to 20) are sometimes trained by their mothers or by older Dommes to get used to dominate men? If this is a recognized practice, i find it marvelous that young women can actually practice themselves on mature male subs..This is a fantadstic concept because it means that the girl (say 19 yrs old) already has complete dominance over men who could be their fathers...That's interesting to think that under the supervision of her mother, the girl can concretely learn how to put a man at his rightful place...It means that as a mature male sub, you already have to worship the old and the young together...My personal favorite range of age would be for a Domme to be from 22 to 38. Not too young, not too old and with some installed degrees of maturity.

_____________________________

Being humiliated, belittled and taken advantage of makes me feel worthy, useful and honored. I would like to meet the right kind of Mistress that would see the advantages of having at her feet a proud natural born submissive.

(in reply to sirsblue)
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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 11:16:00 AM   
suhlut


Posts: 622
Joined: 7/20/2007
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hrm.. thinking on it.. and i know all to well i wouldn't have ever been interested in BDSM  if my mother ever thought about 'teaching me" how to be a Domme or sub towards men.. older or younger.

Aside from that, i also am one whom tends to think a person can't be TAUGHT to be a Dom/me nor taught to be a submissive, it is already there inside a person, just waiting for the right moment to develop.

For me, when very young, i used to talk about things around my parents, and around siblings, and said things that they could't understand, nor did they much like, nor approve of such conversation topics, and so, i was made to feel those things were freaky, thus making me a freak,  and looking around, at the general population of parents, friends acquaitences, ect, i could only see that it sure seemed like nobody else had the same thoughts, ideas as i did, and the cinched it for me.. i was a bonefide freak. i learned to keep my mouth shut at first, and then eventually pushed it all deep down inside, and forgot all about it.

But, like i said, i believe that is inside anyone that is a Dom or a sub, and it just waits for the right moment to develop. And while i say that submission and Dominence can't be "learned" there are many things a Dom or sub have to learn,and explore.

i just know.. i wouldnt have ever wanted anything to do with it, if it had to be something i had to learn from my mother.

_____________________________

That girl is pretty kinky
The girl's a super freak

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(in reply to winoverme)
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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 11:23:12 AM   
winoverme


Posts: 67
Joined: 3/26/2006
From: Montreal
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: suhlut

hrm.. thinking on it.. and i know all to well i wouldn't have ever been interested in BDSM  if my mother ever thought about 'teaching me" how to be a Domme or sub towards men.. older or younger.

Aside from that, i also am one whom tends to think a person can't be TAUGHT to be a Dom/me nor taught to be a submissive, it is already there inside a person, just waiting for the right moment to develop.

For me, when very young, i used to talk about things around my parents, and around siblings, and said things that they could't understand, nor did they much like, nor approve of such conversation topics, and so, i was made to feel those things were freaky, thus making me a freak,  and looking around, at the general population of parents, friends acquaitences, ect, i could only see that it sure seemed like nobody else had the same thoughts, ideas as i did, and the cinched it for me.. i was a bonefide freak. i learned to keep my mouth shut at first, and then eventually pushed it all deep down inside, and forgot all about it.

But, like i said, i believe that is inside anyone that is a Dom or a sub, and it just waits for the right moment to develop. And while i say that submission and Dominence can't be "learned" there are many things a Dom or sub have to learn,and explore.

i just know.. i wouldnt have ever wanted anything to do with it, if it had to be something i had to learn from my mother.

quote:

i just know.. i wouldnt have ever wanted anything to do with it, if it had to be something i had to learn from my mother.


Yes of course...I should have thought of that before. Sometimes, when parents want to impose things on us, we often tend to rebel out and hate their values. We tend to do exactly the opposite of what they expect...But then, what do you enjoy most? Dominating or submitting?

_____________________________

Being humiliated, belittled and taken advantage of makes me feel worthy, useful and honored. I would like to meet the right kind of Mistress that would see the advantages of having at her feet a proud natural born submissive.

(in reply to suhlut)
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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 11:24:07 AM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline
Not unless shes over 20 then I may have a problem with it lol..In all honesty my age hasen't played a factor in whom seems to contact me the age ranges from barely legal to the 70's...I am more attraced my self to those from late 20's to early 40's..but its all good....

_____________________________

US going to hell in a hand basket/

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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 11:28:48 AM   
AMaster


Posts: 814
Joined: 8/4/2005
Status: offline
Age is not the first thing I consider when choosing a partner.  All I care about is compatability. 

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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 11:30:56 AM   
polygirlSA


Posts: 3
Joined: 7/24/2008
Status: offline
My Master is 18 years older than me, and he is actually the youngest Dom I have ever been with. Age is decidedly a factor for me: I like my Dominant to be older, but not as old as my father; I just can't seem to go there (personal preference).

(in reply to BOUNTYHUNTER)
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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 11:31:28 AM   
winoverme


Posts: 67
Joined: 3/26/2006
From: Montreal
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AMaster

Age is not the first thing I consider when choosing a partner.  All I care about is compatability. 

quote:

Age is not the first thing I consider when choosing a partner. All I care about is compatability.


Me too...chemistry first..

_____________________________

Being humiliated, belittled and taken advantage of makes me feel worthy, useful and honored. I would like to meet the right kind of Mistress that would see the advantages of having at her feet a proud natural born submissive.

(in reply to AMaster)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 11:36:40 AM   
VivaciousSub


Posts: 446
Joined: 9/7/2008
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AMaster

Age is not the first thing I consider when choosing a partner.  All I care about is compatability. 


Well here's the thing about age and compatibility, as I see it. I'm 27. I've already run my own business, been a global ops manager for a multinational pharma company, lived in foreign countries all by myself, etc. It's put me in a different mindset than most people my age, which is why I tend to attract - and be attracted to - older men and older friends. I don't have a lot in common with my peer group, and that's a major compatability issue.


_____________________________

9.8m/s^2 + VivaciousSub + ground = ouchx10^9th

To yield readily--easily--to the persuasion of a friend is no merit.... To yield without conviction is no compliment to the understanding of either. ~ Pride and Prejudice

(in reply to AMaster)
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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 11:59:56 AM   
Rover


Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsblue

okay, my question to both Doms/Dommes and subs actually, does age really matter to Y/you?  


At some point, age does matter.  At one extreme, I would not consider anyone who is not of legal age of consent.  That is a hard limit.  The other extreme is less cut and dry, and relative to the individual.  In between, factors (such as maturity, physical condition, ability to relate to one another on many levels, etc) that can often be related to age (but not exclusively so) will have a greater impact on my decision than the chronological number itself.
 
John

_____________________________

"Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions."

Sri da Avabhas

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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 12:13:35 PM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
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Each submissive I have had has been younger.  My first was 20 years younger, my second was 8 years younger and the third was 15 years younger.  I've played with others where the age difference wasn't that great but they all have been younger.  My ex-wife was 2 1/2 yrs. younger.  I tend to feel more comfortable in a dynamic with a woman who is slightly younger.

When the "Daddy" side of me is appealed to, it is much more effective and much more easily reached by someone younger than me.

(in reply to sirsblue)
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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 12:24:28 PM   
marieToo


Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
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I'm in my mid-forties, and I prefer my own age range or older, but have made the exception more than once with younger men.   I still keep an open mind to someone in their thirties, but I do prefer men who are older who have had more life experience; I find I have more in common with them and jive better with them in general.

_____________________________

marie.


I give good agita.









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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 12:24:30 PM   
justgemmie


Posts: 246
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline
greetings blue :)

if we're talking personally, when i was younger i tended to want Men older than i was.  now that i'm 50, i tend to look at Men who are around the same age or younger.  Dauntless is 7 years younger than i am.  He has no problem whatsoever with the age difference.  sometimes it still bothers me that i am so much older than He is, but that is happening less and less often.

i do believe that extremely young folks should not be with folks who are significantly older than they are.  males/females who are 18 (and younger of course) through, say, 22, should not be with males/females who are 15-20-25-or more, years older then they are.  after a person is a little older, say 23 and above, having had at least a few years of adult-hood under their belt, then i have no problems with age differences.

well wishes,
gemmie

_____________________________

"Being a Master to somebody or a slave to somebody is a relationship bound status. Without the relationship the status does not exist and all that is there is the potential or the natural inclination to fulfill such a status in the future." ~ ishyB

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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 12:30:09 PM   
softhearted


Posts: 21
Joined: 4/3/2008
Status: offline
I used to go for older men in general, but at this point in my life I'd rather someone who is either my age or a bit younger. My dad is 7 years older than my mom. That was fine until relatively recently, but now she's mostly a caretaker for him. And since women tend to live longer and retain their sex drive, my age or younger would seem to be a better match. Now whether a younger Dom would be interested in me is quite another question, but I don't see any inherent problem with submitting to a younger man. It's all about who each of you are, after all, not what your respective ages are.

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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 12:33:51 PM   
Stroke


Posts: 109
Joined: 8/17/2007
Status: offline
I think that it is purely a preference issue. Over all subs/slaves tend to feel more comfortable with an experienced man, therefore someone older than they are, and in some cases much older. For the man it is far less cut and dry as a sub/slave can be of any (legal) age and if the master is good at what he does, he can mold the girl into what he desires, regardless of her age. 

(in reply to justgemmie)
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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 12:39:40 PM   
CelticPrince


Posts: 3613
Joined: 4/15/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsblue

Howdy.

i'm not sure if this belongs here, but for lack of anywhere better to put it... and i'm sure it may have been said/asked before but because i'm 'newish' and don't feel like going through ooooollllllld posts all day i'm still gonna make mine.

here goes! *drum roll*

hehe

okay, my question to both Doms/Dommes and subs actually, does age really matter to Y/you?  
My Dom is more than twenty years my senior and I like that that way....mostly.... i could never see me submitting to someone my own age or younger than me (esp younger).  So what about Y/ya'all?  subs does it matter that the Dom is older?  Dom/Dommes should the sub be younger?
And what if there is a relationship other than the D/s one?  I know in mainly 'vanilla' ways of mind, it's a bit taboo (like we've never crossed that line before) to have a ten/fifteen/twenty/etc older boyfriend or girlfriend?  What other thoughts are out there?


blue,

first welcome to the path and to CM.

In my opinion age is very important since I am off the senior catagory and been on the path for a lengh of time to be able to pre determine what is best for the positive relationship. A gal needs nto be a certain age for this "D".

CP

(in reply to sirsblue)
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