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RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 12:42:50 PM

justgemmie

Posts: 246
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline

greetings Master Stroke

with respect, i can understand that You believe it to be a preference issue. the couple of Friends i have that are in their 40s/50s and had younger girls (43/19 and 52/20) both disagree with me also. neither of them are with the young girls any longer.

but i believe that folks, both males and females, should experience some life first before they make commitments with ones so much older than they are. get some life behind them so-to-speak. do age-appropriate/silly/stupid/young stuff with folks that are around the same age. then, after having experienced being young adult, if they are interested in commitment with someone older, fine. they have at least been their age for a while and have had a chance to grow.

well wishes,
gemmie

_____________________________

"Being a Master to somebody or a slave to somebody is a relationship bound status. Without the relationship the status does not exist and all that is there is the potential or the natural inclination to fulfill such a status in the future." ~ ishyB

(in reply to Stroke)

Post #: 21

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 12:53:37 PM

Surata

Posts: 110
Joined: 7/10/2008
Status: offline

It only becomes an issue with me if the other person thinks age and experience automatically equal skill and wisdom.

< Message edited by Surata -- 10/6/2008 12:56:27 PM >

(in reply to justgemmie)

Post #: 22

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 12:57:03 PM

WestBaySlave

Posts: 501
Joined: 9/24/2008
Status: offline

I'd like to say I don't care about age, but I'm really more both more comfortable with and more attracted to guys far older than me.

The mental attraction is because older guys tend to be more mellow, experienced, patient and all in all less judgmental and more open minded. The bad side is that the age difference can also lead to either condescension from them - never a good foot to start out on - or desperation if they feel they're otherwise "off the market" because of their age.

Physically, I just like guys most from around thirty-five to fifty-five. That's something that's fairly "set" in me, and will probably be true when I'm seventy. Looks are something I try not to let bias me too much, but physical attraction is a big part of any kind of romantic chemistry, and will likely influence me for or against a man, consciously or subconsciously.

In general, I rarely go for guys under twenty-five or over sixty-five, but within that age range try to be as open minded and non-judgmental as possible, and would never discount someone for age as long as they're legal and we seemed otherwise compatible.

(in reply to Rover)

Post #: 23

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 12:57:09 PM

subtee

Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline

The ager I get, the more the matter.

_____________________________

Don't believe everything you think...

(in reply to sirsblue)

Post #: 24

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 12:59:03 PM

peppermint

Posts: 5171
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline

Age is important to some, and that is their choice. Age is unimportant to others, and that is also a choice.

(in reply to sirsblue)

Post #: 25

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 1:01:33 PM

MiLadyDiane

Posts: 10
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline

Age differences matter very much to me . With females, I am into " age play, " and I much prefer 20 - 25 yrs difference, say about legal age to about 32 for daughters or nieces, if there is to be any sexual involvement , but adult babies do NOT appeal to me at all. With males, I am usually more interested in more useful older , trained "Butler " types and service slaves , usually in their late 50s - 60s , who wouldn't dream of approaching me sexually . Dynamic relationships with either male or female might be a little closer to my own age, but they would have to be extra special. You are right, a lot of it has to do with chemistry , but only on certain levels, and " eye appeal" and usefulness may not always be the same.

(in reply to CelticPrince)

Post #: 26

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 1:04:01 PM

xxxKellyxxx

Posts: 5
Joined: 6/28/2008
Status: offline

Yes it does for me!

I could never submit to a guy around my age they have to be at least over thirty.

(in reply to MiLadyDiane)

Post #: 27

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 1:28:05 PM

winoverme

Posts: 67
Joined: 3/26/2006
From: Montreal
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: xxxKellyxxx

Yes it does for me!

I could never submit to a guy around my age they have to be at least over thirty.

quote:

I could never submit to a guy around my age they have to be at least over thirty.

Yes!!! Yeah!!!! That's fantastic...Well, i'm there, if ever..you want something

_____________________________

Being humiliated, belittled and taken advantage of makes me feel worthy, useful and honored. I would like to meet the right kind of Mistress that would see the advantages of having at her feet a proud natural born submissive.

(in reply to xxxKellyxxx)

Post #: 28

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 1:54:48 PM

Usako

Posts: 697
Joined: 7/29/2006
From: NYC
Status: offline

I prefer someone closer to my own age. I will not rule out someone older though, if the click is there.

(in reply to winoverme)

Post #: 29

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 2:10:11 PM

sirsblue

Posts: 5
Joined: 9/21/2008
Status: offline

Wow

never thought i'd get so many replies in what four hrs? Anyways thank you A/all for the replies (and the welcomes).

I answered my own question a little, but while reading i wanted to add a little more.
I am 23 (just turned actually oct 1st ;-D) and my Dom is 49 (recently turned also), and it works for me as Dom/sub, but we have had discussions about a 'more' relationship and i just can't get over the twenty plus years for me. As a boyfriend or husband or whatever i've always looked toward older, my ex fiance was almost twoyears older (vanilla, mainly) but i've always been attracted to a few years older to about 10 or 15 years.
Also i am (i know i am) a very mature person (mostly) and in that i have always been able to make friends a lot older than me. When i was little i would go around to the adult neighbors and spend hours talking to them. And even now at work i talk more to the older people that work with me than i do their children more my age.
(not to mention i've always been arond people older than me, my brothers are 9, 10, and 13 years older than me)

(in reply to Usako)

Post #: 30

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 2:20:09 PM

silkenfire

Posts: 130
Joined: 9/27/2007
Status: offline

Personally, although I have never really looked at age as an issue one way or the other, I could never be in an LTR with someone significantly older than me. I'm selfish I guess, I want someone that can grow older with me and be with me, not someone that will die of old age before I'm ready to retire...

But the biggest issue is that I have a prominent role in the vanilla world, a role in many things that would look down upon a relationship with a huge age gap. I'm very happy that I managed to find a mature master that is only 3 years older than me. (By specifying mature, I mean mentally/emotionally; before him, regardless of age, all I found was young boys mentally.) I was not able to really consider anyone with more than a 10 year age gap just based on what society would think, and being in a position to actually care about outside opinions...

(in reply to sirsblue)

Post #: 31

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 2:21:33 PM

silkenfire

Posts: 130
Joined: 9/27/2007
Status: offline

I forgot to say there, to me the D/s relationship and the sexual lover/ boyfriend/girlfriend etc. relationship has to be one and the same, or else it's not fulfilling to me. That probably explains my answer a lot more.

(in reply to CelticPrince)

Post #: 32

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 2:34:50 PM

tweedydaddy

Posts: 673
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline

Age is only important when you are dealing with red wine.
How could anyone be so shallow as to assess a partner on chronology?
Besides, just about everybody lies about their age anyway.
If in doubt have all your sex partners carbon dated.
You know it makes sense

(in reply to sirsblue)

Post #: 33

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 2:39:34 PM

Sandyshores29718

Posts: 343
Joined: 4/8/2008
Status: offline

*fast reply*

Sir is 24 years older than me. Mostly age does not matter; however, there are times that it does come into play. How could it not? Sir has done a great deal more than I have in life and I'm still exploring it. So, it does matter...but its up to the two of you if it becomes an issue or not.

(in reply to CelticPrince)

Post #: 34

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 2:50:15 PM

hopelessfool

Posts: 988
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

I personally NEED someone older then me, Someone my age just doesnt understand why it is I am submissive, or want to be submissive, as well as I cant stand being the only person in the relationship with the ability to be responsable. This is sterotypical and I appologize before i bring offense, but normally guys my age.. even to about 25 have the mentality of a 15 year old... And I dont do miniors, not even ones that just have the mentality of it. I much prefer someone I can have a conversation with, and fart jokes just dont cut it...

_____________________________

" I have nothing left to give, I have found the perfect end, You remain to make it hurt, disappear in to the dirt, carry me to heavens arms.....Dear Agony Just let go of me, suffer slowly, is this the way its gotta be, Dear Agony...."

(in reply to justgemmie)

Post #: 35

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 2:57:09 PM

backseatbebe

Posts: 195
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline

how do you know they didnt grow up in the lifestyle and have more experince than you and your friends combined?!!?

"age-appropriate/silly/stupid/young stuff " and whats shows more experince and wisdom than putting down a whole group of people just because of their age. funny how young = stupid and silly, because what it really looks like youre trying to say is old (age) = judgemental and bitter

personally i prefer my Dom/mes younger than me

quote:

ORIGINAL: justgemmie

greetings Master Stroke

with respect, i can understand that You believe it to be a preference issue. the couple of Friends i have that are in their 40s/50s and had younger girls (43/19 and 52/20) both disagree with me also. neither of them are with the young girls any longer.

but i believe that folks, both males and females, should experience some life first before they make commitments with ones so much older than they are. get some life behind them so-to-speak. do age-appropriate/silly/stupid/young stuff with folks that are around the same age. then, after having experienced being young adult, if they are interested in commitment with someone older, fine. they have at least been their age for a while and have had a chance to grow.

well wishes,
gemmie

(in reply to justgemmie)

Post #: 36

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 3:05:21 PM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: backseatbebe

how do you know they didnt grow up in the lifestyle and have more experince than you and your friends combined?!!?

I don't care how many years someone has had "in the lifestyle"... if they're 20 years old, they still are 20 years old, and don't have more than 20 years of LIFE experience, and only roughly TWO of those years out of high school.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to backseatbebe)

Post #: 37

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 3:07:49 PM

Racquelle

Posts: 600
Joined: 4/21/2008
Status: offline

I have almost always preferred older men, and women basically in my age range. Frenchy is 9 years older and Dee is 15 years older. I am just now at a point where I am seeing how fun it could be to be a cougar though. I sometimes do play with younger folks at parties and such. In my mind, I am still a sweet young thing though, so I am not entirely fond of being seen as a MILF or something. My Jennie and I had great fun dominating men even as old as our Grandfathers when we were just starting out, and that is just kind of how I have always been. The reasons why - well - perhaps that's just between me and my analyst.

And to the topic of the very young players - legal but just barely - that we all encounter in our travels...I suppose they have as much right to the fun as any of us. There is a certain cockiness of youth that can sometimes be endearing, and sometimes ingratiating. I admit, I smirk a bit at the profiles of 19 year old dominants. But then again, I was married to my longest term sub by the time I was 20. I was good at some things, but there is just a general relationship maturity that has come in the intervening years. (And more to come yet, I am sure.) There is a certain delicious paradox of the older, more life-experienced sub surrendering to the hot young dom who renders that sub a quivering mass of childishness.

< Message edited by Racquelle -- 10/6/2008 3:16:19 PM >

(in reply to CelticPrince)

Post #: 38

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 3:16:36 PM

hopelessfool

Posts: 988
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

quote:

ORIGINAL: backseatbebe

how do you know they didnt grow up in the lifestyle and have more experince than you and your friends combined?!!?

I don't care how many years someone has had "in the lifestyle"... if they're 20 years old, they still are 20 years old, and don't have more than 20 years of LIFE experience, and only roughly TWO of those years out of high school.

Cali

and 20 years in some peoples lives is like 40 in others. Some people by the age of 20 have lost both their parents. Some have been being "adults" in the "real" world for more then 2 years some are out on the streets at 14..

Experience Cant never and will never be able to be measured by years. Simply because not everyones parents die on someone at age 35 some die much much sooner, some last much much later. Some experience bad boyfriend experinces very younge, Some never do. Life Experience cant be measured in someones age. Why? Because Age doesnt determin the major life experiences.

It depends on where you grow up, as well. People growing up in poverty in aferica have more life expereince at ten then someone growing up in america "usually". People who are put in foster care, more experience then people that dont, Rape victims more experience then those that arent, abuse surviors more experience then those that arent. someone whos been affected by murder in their lives... All of these live experience giving events can happen to ANYONE at ANY AGE. Meaning 20 years old, could mean a whole HELL of alot of experience. It can also mean None.

_____________________________

" I have nothing left to give, I have found the perfect end, You remain to make it hurt, disappear in to the dirt, carry me to heavens arms.....Dear Agony Just let go of me, suffer slowly, is this the way its gotta be, Dear Agony...."

(in reply to CalifChick)

Post #: 39

RE: does age matter? - 10/6/2008 3:17:04 PM

sirsblue

Posts: 5
Joined: 9/21/2008
Status: offline

i don't see it as being shallow to like someone older than me, or my prefrences. if i liked a black guy instead of a white guy would you call that shallow? i know it's a preffrence, that's why i asked the question in the first place.
and in my experiences guys (mainly, some girls too) my age and younger ( i went to high school and some of the guys in my SENIOR class where the biggest bunch of a-holes) but i will say also in my own class i had a HUGE crush on a guy that was a bit younger than me, not sure how much prolly just a few months...maybe almost a yearyounger, but i was attracted to him. but i'd also had crushes on two older guys in high school, one not even a few months older, the other a year or so older (and again my ex was almsot two years older)

and i also agree with the fact that age is just a number, i don't honestly see anything wrong with a twenty year old marrying or being with a thirty, or even forty year old....my mother's best friend and her husband and about 11 or so years apart... my brother is 32 i think and his wife is 26 (only three years older than me), but my father was (is) younger than my mom.

and as it is, i've also known of younger Doms/Dommes to older subs being more... 'Dommish' for lack of a better word, than one ten years older. that's the mentality, the matureness level. my own person opinion and veiws of it is that i see a guy 18-20 as being im-mature, mainly with the help of the idiots in my graduating class.... but it's possible that NOW that they are older (possible) they've matured.... then again....

it's a matter of prefrences....opinion, nothing with being shallow or not.

(in reply to backseatbebe)

Post #: 40

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