RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (Full Version)

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PeonForHer -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (10/29/2008 5:49:03 PM)

Everybody sobs at the last scene of Breakfast at Tiffany's, TD.   If I watched it and didn't, I'd pop off to the doc's to get my tear-ducts examined.




MsStarlett -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (10/29/2008 5:53:45 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
Oh no . . . that's sad.  I keep hearing of that.  I don't think I normally cry at break ups - I get depressed instead.


Guess you'll never know.  You're not my boy, so you'll never know how dreadful it is for me to send you away.




LadyPact -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (10/29/2008 5:56:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Everybody sobs at the last scene of Breakfast at Tiffany's, TD.   If I watched it and didn't, I'd pop off to the doc's to get my tear-ducts examined.

What's that song?



You say that we've got nothing in common
No common ground to start from
And we're falling apart
You'll say the world has come between us
Our lives have come between us
But I know you just don't care

CHORUS:
And I said what about "Breakfast at Tiffany's?
She said, "I think I remember the film,
And as I recall, I think, we both kinda liked it."
And I said, "Well, that's the one thing we've got."

I see you - the only one who knew me
And now your eyes see through me
I guess I was wrong
So what now? It's plain to see we're over,
And I hate when things are over -
When so much is left undone

CHORUS:
And I said what about "Breakfast at Tiffany's?
She said, "I think I remember the film,
And as I recall, I think, we both kinda liked it."
And I said, "Well, that's the one thing we've got."

You say that we've got nothing in common
No common ground to start from
And we're falling apart
You'll say the world has come between us
Our lives have come between us
But I know you just don't care

CHORUS:
And I said what about "Breakfast at Tiffany's?
She said, "I think I remember the film,
And as I recall, I think, we both kinda liked it."
And I said, "Well, that's the one thing we've got."

Deep Blue Something


from across the pond.





PeonForHer -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (10/29/2008 6:23:59 PM)

Oh Lady P.  You're a leopard with a soft heart.  Soft enough to fly across the pond, even. [;)]





PeonForHer -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (10/29/2008 6:26:34 PM)

That would probably be nastier for me than you could imagine, Ms S.  I'm not very good at being sent away.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
Oh no . . . that's sad.  I keep hearing of that.  I don't think I normally cry at break ups - I get depressed instead.


Guess you'll never know.  You're not my boy, so you'll never know how dreadful it is for me to send you away.





MissIsis -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (10/29/2008 6:28:24 PM)

I enjoy it.  But it has to be genuine tears & crying.  It is that he is vulnerable to me & has chosen to give himself to me in this way.  In some ways, it is a release for him.  I enjoy it, knowing I am the one that has brought that out of him.  Now, whining, no way.  




Soyokaze -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (10/29/2008 6:35:37 PM)

I have no problems crying.  Sad moments in movies or my life.  Some happy ones even.  I had a relationship domme who liked tears, but generally didn't persue it through causing pain.  Tears from raw emotion were the only good ones for her.




WidowSpiders -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (10/30/2008 12:10:53 PM)

Is there a particular reason that most of the male subs who have posted to this thread are throwing up the testosterone macho bullshit lines?

What is it about submitting and really letting go that is so threatening to your egos?

If the concept of crying is humiliating, then say so. Say whether or not that concept appeals, but don't sit there masturbating your shallow pride by whining and strutting.

We are not impressed or challenged by a person who keeps insisting that they are Captain Impervious or The Smart Assed Masochist. While it indeed might be interesting to see how far a Domme would have to go to make one of you defensive roosters squawk, not too many Dommes are thrilled with collaring a sub who is that insecure about his masculinity and submissive interests.

Dacryphilia is not for everyone. Some people enjoy the endorphin rush and are willing and able to open up. Others cannot or find it disturbing. No matter what your position, it should be respected, but do not sit there indirectly insulting others who aren't as 'tough' or 'manly' as you want us all to believe you are.





PeonForHer -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (10/30/2008 2:23:12 PM)

I thought that the general consensus here from subs was that crying is at least OK, WS, and that it isn't, in fact, a threat to our egos.  

For my part: there may be many mixed emotions involved (some of which I don't yet fully understand), but it's still a fascinating idea to me, as well as a turn-on.





WidowSpiders -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (10/30/2008 6:47:27 PM)

Well it is good to know that those comments were not meant to insult or stroke one's own machismo.

She and I are dacryphiles almost exclusively. Bringing someone to tears is the end goal and is the most arousing feat for which we can strive.

Being sadists, it is a dangerous thing indeed. There is an undercurrent of a desire to see those tears and thus up the pain stimuli to get those tears. If a dacryphile is paired up with an insecure macho man who wants to prove how tough he is, it undermines her power and unfortunately may lead to his injury.

Overwhelmed tears of release, pain, apprehension and gratitude are the best. To us, tears lose their appeal if they are gotten through the pain of a disinterested party.
Like any healthy sadist, the pain of another person is not arousing except in very small controlled situations. We are not, for example, aroused when our slaves fall down and scrape their knees on the sidewalk. "Oooh, heh heh heh, are those bits of gravel imbedded in there? Would you mind boohooing a little louder? Heh heh heh..." That's just not a healthy interest. lol

We absolutely live for extreme role play, especially that of mythical demons or monsters attacking a 'victim'. This has lead to problems, however, as sometimes the person is too overwhelmed and distracted to enjoy the sensations. It takes a special person who enjoys that kind of setting to make them successful.

Inducing tears becomes more likely the longer and more intense the scene. Our scenes tend to last more than four hours at a time. Dacryphilia is a difficult paraphilia to appease. The situation and reactions can cause distress or trauma if not carefully monitored and negotiated before hand. Once distress happens, the buzz is killed immediately. As another example, one of us was having an intense scene with a prior slave when he accidentally got a lock of his hair caught in his throat and began dry heaving. Needless to say, even with his eyes watering, there was absolutely nothing arousing about it.

After a lot of trials and errors, we are exceedingly careful not to practice our role play or bring tears unless the slave is aroused by being in a situation that intense.




PeonForHer -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (10/30/2008 8:17:18 PM)

WS,

There's a tremendous amount in what you've said that I want to think about before replying to you.

In the meantime: Thanks very much for that exposition.  It was very intriguing.  Fascinating, actually.

Peon






MSVioletArcane -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (10/31/2008 4:39:56 AM)

There is nothing I enjoy more than a tearful, begging, broken, mess, hanging in My Dungeon after an especially brutal session
of ball busting/kicking and hardcore CBT.  I also delight in bringing a slave/submissive to tears from relentless humiliation and dehumanization.
I pride Myself on being an expert at finding that area of vulnerability, no matter how small, or deeply it is hidden.  Then like a sadist practicing surgery I exploit My subjects weakness.

The Lady Violet Arcane   
     




mummyman321 -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (10/31/2008 8:21:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: WidowSpiders

If the concept of crying is humiliating, then say so. Say whether or not that concept appeals, but don't sit there masturbating your shallow pride by whining and strutting.



I do not find it humiliating at all. It is a very intense release of energy and emotion. Though the trigger to release tears I think is very different from person to person. A person may not be able to endure a certain type of pain. For another humiliation might trigger it.

For me its taking my body to a point where it can no longer tell the difference between pleasure and pain, taking my body and mind to the point of exhaustion, resisting the urge to give in until finally mind and body can no longer resist and finally submit. For me this is a tremendously intense experience. I do truly enjoy it but it also takes a very talented Domme to get me there.
[sm=crop.gif]





worthlessobject -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (11/3/2008 6:11:12 PM)

There is nothing better then crying for your Mistress




missmocka -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (11/5/2008 2:00:54 AM)

the best ones to make cry are the ones who hold a very powerful position within the community. who portray to the public how strong, muscley and powerful they are physically. who have the opinion that they are in fact the more dominant figure. who challenge a mistress on her domination and strength. who are arrogant, and egotistical and believe that women have only one place. I always have this "i told you so" grin, when they are brought to their knees in tears realising that they will never match the position of their female partner.




subinchico -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (2/3/2009 12:52:01 PM)

Thank you OP and Everyone for your time spent here.  How amazingly deep your beautiful minds are, blessing me and every reader, because you share.




T1981 -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (2/3/2009 12:54:24 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mummyman321


I do not find it humiliating at all. It is a very intense release of energy and emotion. Though the trigger to release tears I think is very different from person to person. A person may not be able to endure a certain type of pain. For another humiliation might trigger it.

For me its taking my body to a point where it can no longer tell the difference between pleasure and pain, taking my body and mind to the point of exhaustion, resisting the urge to give in until finally mind and body can no longer resist and finally submit. For me this is a tremendously intense experience. I do truly enjoy it but it also takes a very talented Domme to get me there.
[sm=crop.gif]




Ditto to that, and thank you for saying it so bueatifully! When I'm moved to the point of crying I find nearly spiritual......




Nikitaa -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (2/3/2009 1:55:04 PM)

I did not want to make my sub cry but I did twice and I liked it some. He cried because I would not allow him out the tub. I made him sit in the bathtub wearing my bra and panties (he deserved the punishment). He enjoyed this until two hours go by and I not let him out. Then 4 hours pass and he kicks wall because he is angry I not let him out. Then I give him more time. After 7 hours he cried, then begged, to come out. I enjoyed his crying. I let him out after 8 hours. He never did the same infraction again. This was only instance I punish him this much. The second time is another story for another day.

I made ex boyfriend cry when I pulled his head down by his hair and punched him. I did not enjoy his crying because he was big sissy and not in a good submissive way.

I do not try to make a submissive cry but when sub cries for good reason I feel powerful. If he cries for no good reason (like ex boyfriend) then I feel nothing except scorn for wimp.




Andalusite -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (2/3/2009 2:33:03 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
I've heard enough from you and others now to make me think it might actually be worth practising. 

Tears can be a wonderful reaction, but I would want them to be authentic, not for him to fake or deliberately make himself cry. Screaming, moaning, yelping, and whimpering can be fun, too. I've played with a couple of very stoic submissives and bottoms, who don't react much (not just verbally, but in body language as well), or with ones whose response to subspace/endorphin rush was to be very still, quiet, and zoned out. I don't enjoy that as much as ones who react more visibly and/or audibly.




LittleMeganV -> RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? (2/5/2009 2:37:21 PM)

I don't cry much. I'll moan... god I can't help moaning, and she knows it, which makes gags and other things a lot of fun. I'll beg and protest too when she wants, she has only made me cry few times. It's strange in my mind how one can be a sissy in some respects while not in others. When I have cried it's usually from a very long hard spanking, and while I hate spanking, I always feel so much better and revealed after I've cried even if there wasn't any pent up emotions.

That's my 2 cents




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