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Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 2:57:57 PM

BritBit

Posts: 5
Joined: 9/12/2008
Status: offline

My current fave is "As she [a former slave] explained it (when my most recent relationship ended 9 months ago), because I see and know and care more deeply that anyone else in their lives ever has, and because they have come to value their desire to submit to me, they have to make me an enemy in order to make enough distance from me to feel that they can be themselves without wanting me in their lives."

Two reactions, neither of which I sent:

"Oh, gee, yeah, let's get involved so you can have a brand new enemy to add to the list!"

"Since that makes at least 9 or 10 enemies running around at the moment, I think I'll stay out of the line of fire, thank you very much."

Well, tbh, my first reaction was to roll my eyes and suppress a giggle.

Post #: 1

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 3:14:01 PM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
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"Mission accomplished!"

(in reply to BritBit)

Post #: 2

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 3:18:01 PM

tweedydaddy

Posts: 673
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline

Egomania? I'm far too great for that!

(in reply to BritBit)

Post #: 3

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 4:25:01 PM

PanthersMom

Posts: 2215
Joined: 11/26/2007
From: Cleveland Ohio
Status: offline

my ex husband is well known for spouting off to anyone who will listen that he is the smartest man in the world. what's that old line about empty wagons making the most noise? lol!
PM

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That which does not kill me, better run pretty damn fast

I miss my ex, but my aim is improving!

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Post #: 4

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 4:27:53 PM

persephonee

Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline

Wow...im all twitterpated now...can you send me his ID so i can add myself to his list?

anxiously awaiting my ONE

perse

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to BritBit)

Post #: 5

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 4:37:06 PM

BritBit

Posts: 5
Joined: 9/12/2008
Status: offline

Quoting a former slave describing him in effect as God's gift to women is both hysterical and pathetic. Have to wonder why she's "former" if she thinks he's all that.

I'm a bit surprised that someone hasn't been so devastated at losing him that they decided to take him out. Tho he does claim that a former slave concocted tales of abuse to get him arrested, followed by persecution by a (undoubtedly female) DA despite no evidence. I reckon she was desperate to be his slave but when he wouldn't agree she became his enemy as well. ;)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PanthersMom

my ex husband is well known for spouting off to anyone who will listen that he is the smartest man in the world. what's that old line about empty wagons making the most noise? lol!
PM

(in reply to PanthersMom)

Post #: 6

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 4:44:54 PM

persephonee

Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline

i heard one on here a while back that was kinda cute....

all hat and no cattle....

kind of cowboy-esque...but it works.

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to PanthersMom)

Post #: 7

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 5:24:55 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

My ego is so big that it qualifies as a superego.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to persephonee)

Post #: 8

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 5:30:03 PM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

"Mission accomplished!"

Bingo

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 9

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 6:26:58 PM

VivaciousSub

Posts: 446
Joined: 9/7/2008
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline

My favorite was "No, Anna, that's not how the business world works", in response to something I noted about business. Nevermind that he hadn't run shitall in his life, and I've owned a successful business and ran global operations for a huge corporation.

But of course, he was the All-Knowing Master and thus I was supposed to apparently forget everything I had ever known and just take his word for it.

Jesus, what a poser.

< Message edited by VivaciousSub -- 10/14/2008 6:51:16 PM >

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To yield readily--easily--to the persuasion of a friend is no merit.... To yield without conviction is no compliment to the understanding of either. ~ Pride and Prejudice

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 10

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 6:37:09 PM

marieToo

Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline

The best "eye roller" I ever had went like this:

"I don't know what it is I do to women. But I have a pattern of not just breaking their hearts, but crushing them emotionally. It's not like I do it intentionally, it's just that they become so obsessed with me that they can't function anymore in other areas of their lives."

_____________________________

marie.

I give good agita.

(in reply to BritBit)

Post #: 11

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 8:23:14 PM

monywildcat

Posts: 452
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline

Oh there was a thread floating around here somewhere, posted by Mr. Domly Dom who was so weal and twue he made little actress subby girls flock to him, like a freaking Piped Piper of Floggin' Town. Blech.

My ex was fond of saying things like "you will never find anyone that will treat me the way I do" to which I had the handy response "well thank god, I left because of the way you treat me!!"

_____________________________

Major Life Change Necessitates Personal Reinvention...

(in reply to marieToo)

Post #: 12

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 8:40:15 PM

marieToo

Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: monywildcat

Oh there was a thread floating around here somewhere, posted by Mr. Domly Dom who was so weal and twue he made little actress subby girls flock to him, like a freaking Piped Piper of Floggin' Town. Blech.

Yeah, some guys are just total chick magnets. lmaooo.

_____________________________

marie.

I give good agita.

(in reply to monywildcat)

Post #: 13

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 9:27:53 PM

cravesdom

Posts: 5219
Joined: 3/28/2008
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

My favorite was from a Dom I talked with online for a couple days before deciding that he just wasn't for me because he wanted me to do things that were way outside my comfort zone. After I told him it just wasn't going to work and why, he told me "I would wish you happiness, but I can tell that you will never let yourself be happy." Huh? Because I don't want to be with you and be loaned out to complete strangers and drink a glass full of cum every single morning I don't want to be happy?!

_____________________________

Finally home where I belong.

"A lot of disappointed people have been left standing on the street corner waiting for the bus marked 'Perfection.' " Donald Kennedy

(in reply to marieToo)

Post #: 14

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 9:59:51 PM

Lynnxz

Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline

Hehehe....

"I'm a truely skilled Dominant man, it's why I have so many play toys"

The girls usually get tired of him running off at the mouth, and ignore him though.... that man had a true case of verbal diarreah... NEVER, EVER shut up.

_____________________________

HBIC

(in reply to cravesdom)

Post #: 15

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/14/2008 10:18:26 PM

WestBaySlave

Posts: 501
Joined: 9/24/2008
Status: offline

I had a guy a while back who - after I stopped answering his emails - wrote me every time I changed my profile and said "I know you've changed your profile because of ME."

It was creepy, yet very amusing at the same time.

(in reply to Lynnxz)

Post #: 16

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/15/2008 12:30:08 AM

FaerieQueene

Posts: 32
Joined: 9/16/2008
Status: offline

Wow, this thread is great. A few egomaniacal lines:
"I swear to God, the hooker gave the money back!" - Comedian Adam Ferarra
"Well I guess you're poly now because I was too much man for you to ever be satisfied with just one man again." - the ex, who also took credit for introducing me to bdsm (he was vanilla...?) and bisexuality (he was straight...?)

(in reply to WestBaySlave)

Post #: 17

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/15/2008 3:14:18 AM

ShiftedJewel

Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline

I was splitting up with an ex and he asked me the same thing that most ex's ask... "Can we still have sex?" I told him no, I'd rather date women. His response? "Oh, thank God, I thought it was because of me!" I'm still shaking my head over that one.

Jewel

_____________________________

Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

(in reply to FaerieQueene)

Post #: 18

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/15/2008 3:32:12 AM

Twicehappy2x

Posts: 1096
Joined: 3/27/2007
Status: offline

One of my recent favorites is one from a thread in the ask a Mistress section;

quote:

:ORIGINAL Coupleofwhats

Unless someone's cloned me without my knowledge, there isn't another domme out there who can do what I do. He can talk to them all at once if he likes!

_____________________________

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to BritBit)

Post #: 19

RE: Funniest line from an egomaniac? - 10/15/2008 3:40:22 AM

Motionflipotion

Posts: 65
Joined: 1/24/2008
From: City of depression
Status: offline

My favorite dropped like poop out my own mouth.

"From now on you should let me think for you"

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<Don Flip

(in reply to Twicehappy2x)

Post #: 20

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