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RE: Weight question - 11/3/2008 7:58:18 AM

leadership527

Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: NuevaVida
My former master: "I'm concerned about your health. We're going to do something about it."

Yup, that'd be about exactly what I said. Although since that was very very early in our transition to M/s, I asked whether I had authority in the areas of diet and excercise rather than simply asserted it.

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~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to NuevaVida)

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RE: Weight question - 11/3/2008 11:13:07 PM

Belladonna30

Posts: 43
Joined: 1/18/2008
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This post is getting so much attention! It has always been a problem for me, being overweight. My Dom has been wonderful enough to understand how awful I feel and although he accepts me the way I am, he is also willing to help me feel better. I am using the Medifast program and it is a hard one to follow, but the results are impressive. I am currently not disciplined enough to stick to it on my own. It helps that He writes out my menu for the day. Its not a major thing, but the mental bondage to stick to the list and not stray is strong. So for us it is working so far. I have slipped up and fudged and I am ashamed as is and do not get punished for it since I do it alone already. I want to do this for me. I hate the way I look and the way I feel. I respect those larger gals who love themselves as is. I wish I had that. I know I felt better when I was thin, I know my health was vastly improved when I was thinner too. Diabetes and super high cholesteral run in our family so just short of being a strict vegetarian I am screwed regarding what I can eat. It is baby steps. I quit smoking, got off birth control, and now I am tackling my weight. My Dom is supportive and althought I cry and get frustrated because I want a fattening ceasar salad (the dressing will kill you! lol) or Olive Garden or whatever, he gently teases me and says, Ya me too! But in all of this he has lost 15 pounds and is looking and feeling better too. I guess my whole point is, if you have a supportive Dom/me that will help you in a caring way and make you want to succeed by all means ask them for thier assistance. Every dynamic is different and I wish everyone well with their goals. Cheers!

(in reply to NuevaVida)

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Post #: 62

RE: Weight question - 11/3/2008 11:32:12 PM

Airie

Posts: 1
Joined: 10/11/2008
Status: offline

If you don't like it, don't chose the chubby sub.

If it happens later, deal or man up and mention it.

If you hit on her on this site, she says she'd not interested and you verbally abuse her because of a few extra pounds, you automatically fail at life in every way possible.

Fat isn't a curse, it's a state. My weight fluctuates constantly. Right now I'm at 175 at 5'9.5" but my profile says 200 because I'd rather someone to loves my curves and is a bit taken aback I'm not as big than someone who determines I'm slightly too big because they have no idea what my size should look like.

Not to metion it weeds out the insecure losers who defend their inability to successfully deal with rejection. Dom's should be better than that. It's been a really disappointing week here for a girl looking for a Dom.

(in reply to Belladonna30)

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Post #: 63

RE: Weight question - 11/3/2008 11:59:44 PM

Eliana

Posts: 9
Joined: 11/3/2008
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First of all and speaking from personal experience and what I know of so many others, it is NOT always easy to lose weight, no matter how hard you try because for one thing there can be complex underlying issues, both physical and/or psychological. Also, they have to want to do it for THEMSELVES for it to work in the long term. (I am sure we know how many people can lose weight, even a LOT for short times, and then put it all back on and then some). If the Dominant is constantly ragging on the submissive about her weight, it's probably just going to make her more depressed and insecure which for many will mean it will just exacerbate their eating/dietary problems.

IMHO if the submissive or slave WANTS to lose weight THEMSELVES then a supportive Dominant can be fantastic. I struggled with weight issues for a long time on and off, and finding the answer to a complex problem was not easy - I also had some significant medical issues to overcome. Also the solution (in my case) was not easy - I have finally lost a lot of weight by living on 600 calories a day for nearly a year and am now sure I will reach my goal weight. (Part of my diet involves taking Optifast, otherwise 600 calories really wouldn't be do-able in the long term nutritionally).

BUT one key for me was my Dominant's caring, support and encouragement. That inspired and motivated me even more, plus it just reinforced the deep trust we have in each other and I especially have in him - that we're here for each other, no matter what, and our relationship actually pivots more than anything on kindness - yet I am sure I would walk across hot coals if he asked me to!

(in reply to XaviersXian)

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RE: Weight question - 11/4/2008 12:07:35 AM

WannaSPOON

Posts: 47
Joined: 12/26/2006
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Yeah, I really didn't expect this to get so many replies. Particularly so many good ones. I thank you all, I learned WAY more than I could have even dreamed.

Sorry to hear that, Airie. The internet brings the world together, but it also gives a voice to the people who SHOULD NOT have one.

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Post #: 65

RE: Weight question - 11/4/2008 3:29:11 AM

barelynangel

Posts: 6233
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quote:

I am using the Medifast program and it is a hard one to

Belladonna:

I've tried medifast and wasn't able to stick with it in the past, however, one of my good friends recently has done awesome on it. The thing she did that was different than what i did was she lol 1) did it correctly, and 2) she really utilizes her coach, for support, guidance and advice. She has recently become a coach herself, she is currently 6 lbs away from losing 50 lbs in about 4 months. She honestly looks beautiful. So kudos to you for sticking with it and keeping at it. It will be worth it in the end.

angel

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What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
R.W. Emerson

(in reply to WannaSPOON)

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RE: Weight question - 11/4/2008 7:37:00 PM

sweetpeachy

Posts: 1
Joined: 7/15/2007
Status: offline

I would not mind if Master directly told me to loose weigt. I am not that sensative. I want my body to be pleasing to him and if it is not I would want him to tell me that. In fact he has me on a diet now and an exercise regime. He has me get on the scale in front of him twice a month and reads my food journal.It helps keep me in check. Hope that helps some.

(in reply to XaviersXian)

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RE: Weight question - 11/4/2008 9:34:44 PM

Barelily

Posts: 96
Joined: 10/8/2008
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LydiaSciKitten, in the case you sighted your right. This is why I don't go around calling all Dom's, Master or a Master. If he gave her an order to lose weight it was his responsibility to monitor that, maybe by waiting until he got back. Yes her body is his and it's that very fact that means he has to be aware of whats going on with it at all times.

But, as with anything in life there are always exceptions, we can never get away from that fact, if we all agreed the issue should be pussy footed around then some one would sight a case where the slave got so over weight she had all kinds of various illness or died from a heart attack. It works both ways.

If a Dom wants to have complete control over a slave or sub they really should think more about health issues and remember if they break them they can't use them and they've lost hard earned trust.
But slaves also need to keep in mind that most Dom's don't mince words, thats one of the things that draws us to them in the first place. I wouldn't think having a thin skin and being a slave would mix very well.

Disclaimer: This post was made in response to the post made by LydiaSciKitten and is based on my opinion and experiences only.

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Post #: 68