RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (Full Version)

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CelticPrince -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/13/2008 1:54:29 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BOUNTYHUNTER

I am 60 will become 61 this summer, a part of a married Dom couple, My wife Diane is 19 years younger then me, so far for the past 12 years thing have been great..people that contact me are usually women from 18 to the upper 50's and with her she sees alot of mail from the older male slaves....I can see why a woman with dreams of marriage, children want a much young man in their lives, who wants to be left behind to raise the family on their own,My children are grown and gone,I have no desire more ..I have three women besides my wife in my life ,one collared and two seeking one, the oldest is 33, for some reason this ol' cowboy Dom finds his mail box full..after all most seek experience, settled Dom's with the ability to teach along with being able to care for them, just my three cents,,,bounty
[/quote

Bounty,

well said!!

CP



monywildcat -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/13/2008 2:12:41 PM)

For me, like many others, age is just a number, what would matter to me if I were looking is basic compatibility.  If I am with someone that routinely goes to bed 4 hours before me (I'm a night owl, and seem to need less and less sleep these days) doesn't like the same music, books, restaurants, and bars that I do, among other things, it's just not going to work.  I don't care if we were born on the same day. 

Now, Daddy is 3 months and 10 days older than me.  We still act like we are 12 sometimes.  We hear this alot, and we also hear how we couldn't be more perfect for one another.  It's awesome.  [:D][:D]

Edited to silence the inner spelling nazi



LadyConstanze -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/13/2008 2:52:58 PM)

I would say age isn't really the important factor within a limit, I would find it highly unlikely to be sexually attracted to somebody who could be my grandfather, not because of the way he looks (hey I find Sean Connery quite hot - he looks great) but simply I want to do a lot of things, I want to explore things, I would love to do things with my partner and explore stuff together, not have him tag along and be bored simply because he has already done it. Would simply not work for me. But anything up to 15 years I don't think is such a great age difference, 30 years or more is when it is quite significant.



impishlilhellcat -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/13/2008 3:02:17 PM)

I say age is just age. I've dated close to my age and much older in my life thus far. Before it didn't much matter if we clicked we clicked age wasn't a factor. Age still isn't much of a factor now days. It's do we have the same things in common. If a man has already had kids and doesn't want more then we are not compatible does that come with age yes. If a man is too childish and only wants to play games then we are not compatible does that come with being younger and irresponsible yes. I say age it's just a number and you are only as old as you feel. It's all about mutual goals.



LadyConstanze -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/13/2008 3:14:26 PM)

I think if you are roughly (say within 5 to 15 years) the same age, chances are that your interests are much closer together and your relationship will have a better chance of surviving...

Of course there is never a guarantee for anything but the thought that if I reach 40 my partner is already old and it is more than likely that he will die within the next few years, that would be a concern for me. Also the fact that while I still want to have an active career, that he might be already retired and just wants to enjoy the autumn of his life would be something...



antipode -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/13/2008 3:59:36 PM)

quote:

the older we are, the better we are


Capice, paysan, si.. (see? I knew living in New Yawk for a while had to be good for sumtin')

And I will keep it up until my UPS guy delivers the walker.



antipode -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/13/2008 4:05:03 PM)

quote:

Kabiche?


Unless this is the Yiddische translation..

(just making fun of ya..)



antipode -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/13/2008 4:06:03 PM)

quote:

And some of you just turn to vinegar.


Balsamic, one hopes.. [;)]



CelticPrince -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/13/2008 6:28:16 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Eliana

I've noticed one feature of the BDSM world is older Dominants often seeking submissives or slaves who are considerably younger than them (for relationships, not just play).  I've also noticed - with all respect - a lot of them seem to have been looking a very long time without apparent success.   This leads me to ponder - how realistic are they being? 

I've observed these days that not only do a lot of the younger women clearly want men who are also younger, but in recent years a lot of the OLDER women also want - and get - men much younger than themselves.  There seems to be a feeling that the younger men don't have the "old attitudes" which is to say they don't generally display the chauvinistic attitudes which tend to be more prevalent in the older generations, and that young men make them much happier.

I'm generalising here of course and not suggesting by any means there are not many very desirable older men, nor that they all have sexist outlooks, but realistically how many older men are really going to attract women half their age, except maybe for the odd few?

It would also be interesting to hear why some of them do or would prefer younger women.

Thanks!


Eliana,

I have been away on a business trip so I have come to this thread late but being "older" it is one that I can shed some light on both from a persona; basis and from a mentoring basis.

It is true that many males, even aka Doms prefer younger fems/sub for a variety of reasons. Sometimes, nay many times it is sex as the younger tended to be more liberal sexually be it anal, oral or inventive vaginal. Sometimes it is simply because the younger makes them feel younger.

The other end of the stick is the younger fem is much more selective re age for the reverse of the above. Older = less adverturous and perhaps he is only good for one time per session. Commonality of interests cannot be understated as well.
For myself, I hold no general age selection other than at least 35 years of age and methinks I will be moving that up to forty pretty soon.

CP



ThundersCry -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/13/2008 6:38:22 PM)

Apparently...ya have never been fucked by an older lady...
 
They put the younger ones to shame...=L=
 
Ya, I know...it ain`t about sex..



CelticPrince -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/13/2008 6:42:28 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ThundersCry

Apparently...ya have never been fucked by an older lady...
 
They put the younger ones to shame...=L=
 
Ya, I know...it ain`t about sex..


TC,

Well your close, it about the D/s dynamic, but I have enjoyed my share of fems older than I.

CP



Opalescence -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/13/2008 11:49:55 PM)

I have a preference for men much older than my self. 15+ years is a common theme.

That being said, I like men who are secure and stable. I'm not looking for a sugar daddy but let's break this down...

Women want security because they are wired to seek those who can protect them and their babies. In today's society money = power = security. A lot of young men are just starting their careers. Not to say that they are no young men who don't have stability and security even if they're only 20.

Within that mentality, there are a lot of younger women attracted to older men. I don't think your statement is accurate necessarily. I also don't believe it's 100% wrong either. Women look for those who can provide for them and this factors into several different things. It doesn't matter so much the age it just tends to be that older men are more capable of providing women what they're biological selves tell them they need.

'sides men get hotter as they get older anyway. LOL





Lucero -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/14/2008 1:47:45 PM)

quote:



And some of you just turn to vinegar. 


What would be a nice fresh healthy salad without vinegar ? ;-)

Like some said, it isn't the age itself, it's the “difference”. Which, in the dynamics of an D/s, can have a positive influence.

Besides that, if I can choose between a nice 22 year old sub-girl or someone my own age, it's easy. But the real choosing comes not with age. I tend to look for younger sub-girls, but in the end it doesn't count.

I do want to feel she's young “in mind”, like I am. If she is and she's 63, that's ok.

Lucero



Phanes -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/18/2008 11:08:19 AM)

I'm 46 as of last week (thank you all for your birthday wishes -and yes!  I did get my happy birthday boink) 

My current slave is 11 years younger than I am and previous to her, I was with a woman 18 years younger..  It is not, as someone has suggested, merely for the supposed "obvious" reasons of embodiment, that a younger partner is sometimes preferred.. Rather it's her intentionality.. I really don't care how old a body is (reasonably) if you're 50 and your mind keeps telling you you're 25.. Chances are we'll get along just fine!!

But I'd rather the comany of a 50lb bag of potatoes to a drop dead gorgeous gal who has no leap in her step, and nadda goin on in her imaginary...

I am quite certain however, that I, personally, won't ever be involved with someone exceedingly younger than I am, anymore...  Oh, I've also got a thingy now about not coming within 10 feet of an Aries woman too...*shrug*  --Nothing personal to you Aries gals....But bein a Scorp hooked up with an Aries?  What a wicked thing to unleash upon the world!



MsFlutter -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/18/2008 11:20:48 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MidMichCowboy

A lot of ladies my age are done forever with ummms. I have imams from 8 to 22. They are a non-negotiable part of my life.


I'm still new to this board ...please tell me what ummms and imams are. Thank you !



Phoenixpower -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/18/2008 11:44:20 AM)

quote:

Women want security because they are wired to seek those who can protect them and their babies. In today's society money = power = security. A lot of young men are just starting their careers. Not to say that they are no young men who don't have stability and security even if they're only 20.

Within that mentality, there are a lot of younger women attracted to older men. I don't think your statement is accurate necessarily. I also don't believe it's 100% wrong either. Women look for those who can provide for them and this factors into several different things. It doesn't matter so much the age it just tends to be that older men are more capable of providing women what they're biological selves tell them they need.


pretty much agree on that one. Financial security is not that much of importance to me, but in regards of "protect them and their babies" I turned down a few doms aged 55-65, because if I would start to set Ums into this world I would like for future Ums to have a Dad and not a Granddad straight away. I got sometimes the comment from a 60+ guy that he is likely to be fitter then myself...well, great for him, but that doesnt change my view that I would not want to to have a serious relationship with such an age difference. Most of my relationships were between 8-15 years older then myself, and thats the age difference I feel comfortable with.

Also personally I think that guys my age (at least the once I know) see it as a problem if you are serious about certain views/topics, where guys who are a little bit older then myself are more likely to be relaxed about and mature enough to deal with it. When I am at one day not the happiest bunny then a guy my age is more likely to say "dont be so serious" or "take it easy" whereas an older guy is more likely to able just to accept that we have good days and bad days and I can be who I am.

Personally I just think that guys my age can't genuinly and competent handle me and I feel safer with an approx. age gap from 10 years.  



akisha -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/18/2008 12:07:05 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsFlutter

quote:

ORIGINAL: MidMichCowboy

A lot of ladies my age are done forever with ummms. I have imams from 8 to 22. They are a non-negotiable part of my life.


I'm still new to this board ...please tell me what ummms and imams are. Thank you !


it stands for children. As talking about them is against TOS we input umms for unmentionables.



SugarKitten -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/18/2008 12:43:29 PM)

Personally i've always had a preference for older men. But only a couple of years older than me. I always tried to get with people a little older and failed, the person i'm with now is three years YOUNGER than me and i couldnt be happier. The thought of going with a man who technically is old enough to be my dad just gives me the creeps and makes me feel physically sick, despite wanting maturity out of the man i'm with. My Dom and I are just taking things slow and learning the ropes, and he is mature for his age. I guess i'm just trying to recapture my youth somewhat, cause i'd love to be the age he is now if i'm totally honest. xD

What works for one doesnt work for someone else. :3



Hisunfoldinglily -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/18/2008 2:19:22 PM)

When i was looking i was speaking with Dominants that were all older than myself. i was adament about not even thinking about a younger Dominant. i was Ffriends with plenty. But didn't even fathom a relationship with Them. Then along came my Master and those thoughts went totally out the window without hesitation. Wwe have several Ffriends that are the opposite though (He is older and she is younger). It seems to work for Tthem and that is what is important.



purrrrfectkitten -> RE: Do younger subs/slaves really want much older Dominants? (11/18/2008 3:18:35 PM)

My father used to tell my brother to date older women......"They don't yell, they don't tell, they don't swell and they're grateful as hell"........



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