Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (Full Version)

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AAkasha -> Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 5:42:17 PM)


For the purpose of this thread, I don't mean casual kisses, pecks on the cheek. I am talking about "french kissing" or "making out," so to speak.

I'm curious how many femdoms see kissing as an act of intimacy that crosses certain lines.  Do you have non sexual relationships with men you top who you kiss?  Do you never kiss a man unless intimate? 

If you are in a romantic femdom relationship, does your submissive partner initiate kisses, or is that something in your court entirely?

If you are a professional dominatrix, do you ever kiss your clients?

How does kissing tie into your dominance?

Akasha





darchChylde -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 5:46:57 PM)

*darchChylde grabs a chair, some popcorn and a big bottle of Dew and just waits for the entertainment*

Oooh, this has gotta be good.



ladyem51 -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 5:47:57 PM)

I do gentle, peck kisses to reward good boys and girls.  But tongue kissing - deep sexual kissing, I only do with my most intimate partner.  He can initiate it, but not prematurely.  There's a right time, when the intimacy has reached that level. 



PeonForHer -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 5:51:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

*darchChylde grabs a chair, some popcorn and a big bottle of Dew and just waits for the entertainment*

Oooh, this has gotta be good.



Too right.  A chair grabbed next to you, front row.  I love it when someone on CM starts a thread on the really filthy stuff.

BTW, in the UK, the sort of rather disgusting kissing Akasha is referring to is known as "snogging".  In case you didn't know.



MsStarlett -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 5:52:20 PM)

I kiss everyone.  Even my fem-friends.  Long, deep, passionate, hot kisses. 



darchChylde -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 5:53:56 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

I kiss everyone.  Even my fem-friends.  Long, deep, passionate, hot kisses. 


*sits riveted*

Gosh... doesn't Akasha start the best wank threads?



Lockit -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 5:54:45 PM)

I used to tell people I was with that if I stopped kissing them, it was over.  Kissing is major in my book and is very intimate and I must be with a good kisser for anything else to happen.  In a scene I would typically call the shots and when we would kiss, but in every day life, I don't care who starts it, I just want 'it'.

I don't top so I don't know about that or if I would.  I just can't picture wanting to do anything with anyone I wouldn't kiss.  So for me this doesn't apply.

I don't always want to be in charge so to speak.  I have my dominant kisses...mmmm... but I want all sorts of kissing and not always 'just' one type or reason for kissing.



AAkasha -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 5:57:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

I kiss everyone.  Even my fem-friends.  Long, deep, passionate, hot kisses. 


Interesting. I'm struggling with the "intimacy" of kissing as I explore my newly open relationship with my primary partner. We both have a discomfort level with the idea of kissing as part of domination because it's an intimate, romantic, affectionate act. Yet, at times, I see kissing (in some forms) as an act of dominance and nothing more. It's very hard to explain and it's clearly easier to just keep it off the table, but I am trying to sort it out. Just in case.  I don't even know that I would ever *want* to kiss another man. 

It seems illogical that it's ok for a man to make me quite wet, to make me feel wildly intense erotic emotions, satisfy me on a very primal level, yet sharing a non-romantic kiss is not ok. Or, is that just a slippery slope, and after agreeing to that, then at some point, "it's just fucking," or "it's just his tongue in my pussy, I don't love him, who cares?"  (shudder).  I can't see myself going down that path, but we're trying to clearly define the levels of intimacy that are ok, and will remain ok.

Oddly, like most typical hot blooded men, he's perfectly fine with me making out with women :) It's just the boys he doesn't like.

Akasha



AAkasha -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 5:58:51 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

I kiss everyone.  Even my fem-friends.  Long, deep, passionate, hot kisses. 


*sits riveted*

Gosh... doesn't Akasha start the best wank threads?



As you will see..this is actually an emotional issue with me, one I am trying to sort out, and not just about tongues in mouths....

Akasha



darchChylde -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 6:00:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

I kiss everyone.  Even my fem-friends.  Long, deep, passionate, hot kisses. 


*sits riveted*

Gosh... doesn't Akasha start the best wank threads?



As you will see..this is actually an emotional issue with me, one I am trying to sort out, and not just about tongues in mouths....

Akasha



Understood, just read your previous post.  But you do start the best wank threads, nomatter the intent behind them.  I'll behave now.



PeonForHer -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 6:04:39 PM)

I shall also behave impeccably, Akasha.  Pray continue.



Lockit -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 6:09:41 PM)

Maybe it would be interesting to see how the men feel about this.  It might help determine a few things. (smile)



AAkasha -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 6:11:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

Maybe it would be interesting to see how the men feel about this.  It might help determine a few things. (smile)


Absolutely.  What role does kissing play in your submission, subs?  Would you be disinterested in submitting to a woman who would never kiss you? 

For sub men in an open relationship, is kissing "off the table," along with other forms of perceived intimacy?

Akasha



Lockit -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 6:15:21 PM)

LOL... it does seem they disappeared!



FetishRose -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 6:23:07 PM)

I very much enjoy kissing, and for me, it can either be a very dominant kiss from a Lady that turns my knees to water, a sweet, loving kiss from the same Lady, or even cute little pecks just because.  I love kissing; I love to be kissed.  As to whether or not I initiate it, that depends on the Lady and her personal preferences.  I don't have a problem turning my face up to be kissed; whether she chooses to or not is up to her.
That said, if my submission was a service submission without a sexual component, I wouldn't expect to be kissed, and could still submit.  However, if I was in an intimate relationship...yes, kissing is important.



darchChylde -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 6:24:32 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
Absolutely.  What role does kissing play in your submission, subs? 


It's really neither here nor there for me, I'm really more of a hugger.  In a serious romantic relationship, which is not how I would consider my relationship with Ma'am; kissing is very important but not so much for D/s.  Sure kissing is nice, but not a priority.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
Would you be disinterested in submitting to a woman who would never kiss you? 


Absolutely not, like I said it's not a major issue.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
For sub men in an open relationship, is kissing "off the table," along with other forms of perceived intimacy?


As far as I understand, nothing is really out of the question so long as I am honest with Ma'am and act in a safe and responsible manner.  I haven't really been all that tempted to see how far I could go or what the limits would be.  If I do run into someone that piques my interest, I'm sure I will seek to find clarity in these issues.



MsStarlett -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 6:31:20 PM)

I just like the act of kissing.  I love the passion and the energy passing between myself and another.  I live for that rush.  Sometimes, it's like my own little 'sub space' or 'Domme place'.  I only enjoy it when I initiate and I can feel the other person just melt.  It's like it's own little sphere of that power of lust.  Even my husband will occasionally ask "Kiss me like a stranger" which means he want me to go to that special place where the heart and emotion disconnect and it's all about the fire and passion.



greeneyedreamer -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 6:32:26 PM)

Being a submissive, i need kissing and lots and lots of it. Not into the "kink" only thing. I have to have a deep connection with the dom I am with. Kissing deepens it and makes us both happy.

Dreamer



Ferns -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 6:34:23 PM)

Kissing is like great sex, without the sex, like the promise of sex, and sometimes better than sex and you get to put every aspect of D/s into it.  You can be soft and tender, and harsh, and hard, and you get to hurt and bite and put him where you want with a fist in his hair and tease and deny and penetrate and force and play and taste him from the inside.

I rarely get involved in a D/s relationship without intimacy and would never do without it.  Who initiates it?  I really don't care as long as one of us does!

Ferns



CdnExplorer -> RE: Kissing. Who initiates? How intimate is it? Do you dominate a man you never kiss? (11/17/2008 6:39:32 PM)

I do love a good kiss, especially those of the "dominant kind". I have some very fond memories of being kissed where I felt like little more than a meal for a tigress. I'm not terribly comfortable initiating but then the relationship I'm in is rather new and that could change. Kissing only really works for me in a relationship where there is some emotional involvement. With a casual play partner I imagine I'd feel very awkward and would never initiate it. I wouldn't complain if such a person kissed me, but it wouldn't be the same.



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