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oddjobbery -> RE: Age and BDSM (11/25/2008 11:40:18 AM)
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quote:
Great example of the bravado with which a young person will make a statement as though it's a fact everyone knows. There are big differences between each decade of life, and you usually cannnot imagine what they're like until
you get there yourself.
Ms. Millgrove, the hypocrisy of your statement astounds. You accuse me of making sweeping generalizations (which I did not) and then make a sweeping generalization yourself. No fault, though - I understand that you think time makes experience - I just don't agree.
In any case,
Of course there are big differences between each decade of life - I have no doubt that it's a viciously difficult thing to learn that your body is failing you, that the younger generation is pushing you into oblivion, that the life you've lived is not the life you planned, that your regrets outweigh your successes, etc. I just doubt that you remember the extraordinary change that the youth experience.
You see (and I'm sure, now that I'm telling you, you'll remember) the life I'm leading has no routine. It has no sureties. It changes day to day to day to day - the changes you go through, the failings of your body, whatever - they are nothing as compared to what I and the millions other like me experience every day. Do you know how to use a debit card? Because I didn't up until a year and a half ago. Do you know what it's like to have sex with a woman for the first time? Because I didn't, up until 4 years ago. do you know what it's like to have your first drink? Because I didn't, up until two years ago. Do you know what it's like to feel love for someone other than your family for the first time? Because I didn't, up until three years ago. Do you know what it's like to realize race means something to people for the first time? That there are people not like you? That there are hurt, sick people in the world that no one will save? Because I didn't. And now I do. I look to the past and see that my life has gone through more stages than I thought was possible - and almost all in my teen years.
A thirteen year old and a fifteen year old cannot relate, except about the constant change they experience. A sixteen year old and an eighteen year old cannot relate, except about the fluctuating nature of life. An eighteen year old and a 22 year old are not even similar - and don't get me started on 22 and 24, or even 24 and 28. What you seem to have forgotten is that sure, life changes from decade to decade as you age - but only so much.
There is only so much in your world that you can learn - and you learn the majority of it in your youth. When I said three worlds, I understated immensely - it's more like three thousand. The difference between a 42 year old and a 60 year old is this - one is in the beginning of watching his children grow up, and the other is at the end. The difference between a 20 year old and a 38 year old, suffice to say, is not.
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