RE: What is Monogamy?

RE: What is Monogamy? (Full Version)

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fyreredsub -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/25/2005 4:45:46 PM)
ohhhhhhhh hot tubs....where's da pool boy w/ margaritas quote: ORIGINAL: JohnWarren quote: ORIGINAL: IrishMist Well, I don't know about everyone else...but my Christmas was really good. Had some friends over, my daughter let it be known for another year that yes, she rules this house [&:]...we had some good food, good conversation Heck, the only thing missing was some good sex [8\|] No daughter, but good food, good friends and some great hot tub sex.

IrishMist -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/25/2005 4:49:41 PM)
OMG....bobbing for orgasms? Directions please..................... [:)]

Nendarye -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/25/2005 4:52:36 PM)
quote: roflmao, oh girl, you are sooooooooooo bad I try my best LOL...

fyreredsub -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/25/2005 5:00:03 PM)
*swats fanny n runs to hot tub*[:D]

veronicaofML -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/25/2005 6:57:05 PM)
to me monogamy is one on one. i dont feel you should have to prove your manhood, womanhood by being with more than one person. if you feel the need to have more than one then i am not the person for you. =============== there it is

JohnWarren -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/25/2005 7:07:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: IrishMist OMG....bobbing for orgasms? Directions please..................... [:)] Hands cuffed behind back, feel her hand on the top of your head, take deep breath, suddenly water is everywhere, lick for all you are worth

IrishMist -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/25/2005 7:14:34 PM)
Ok......deep breath...............here goes...................

Mercnbeth -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/25/2005 7:35:56 PM)
quote: candystripper: IMO, the angst this thread has generated has been entirely due to the disapproval other people displayed towards me and my life choices.The posts made by brightspot and MercnBeth are prime examples. quote: Mercnbeth: candy, pink, et al, Merry Christmas! No one should be spending this morning concerned about posts at CM or any internet site. We hope you are having fun and are enjoying doing better things. Be Well! May all your wishes come true. Merc & beth "Highly Monogamous" Whose monogamy isn't concerned with physical sensation. "Highly Heterosexual" Whose most erotic scene participation was part of a flogging scene between two men. "Highly Fun Loving" Who being "serious" is a condition to be avoided outside business hours. "HIGHLY Happy" Who only need the company of each other to be so. Member of the "Clique of Merc & beth". I won't assume to speak for brightspot, but in our case, Yeah the post directed to you above has nothing but "angst" and negativity and disapproval thinly disguised as pity. quote: Candy: i am a bit amazed that intelligent, well-read and experienced people can think i should substitute their judgment for my own; We are wondering...Exactly how is it possible to have judgment without experience? Unless you qualify every statement with; "I don't think I would like..." the statements are without reference and therefore lack merit for consideration. It would be similar to me saying I hate scuba diving and then adding that I think anyone who goes underwater is lower than me because they are risking death, and find pleasure in something I don't understand. I've never scuba dived. I've never even snorkeled. I rarely open my eyes when swimming underwater. Without experience, or even a relative reference point any opinion is conjecture. Your problem, your issues are as simple as that. Consider from a legal perspective you have a panel of "expert witnesses" that you are pandering to for advice, get the advise, but because it is in opposition to your theorem you ignore them. But not enough, you denigrate their experience as being illegitimate. Now it's gotten to the point that it's suspicious that anyone in agreement with you is just another new "pink" persona; created so you don't feel so alone. This site is NOT life! It doesn't matter what anyone thinks, it doesn't really matter that no one agrees with you. Your criteria for your "one" is similar to the copy salesman who was trying to sell a desk top copier for $1 Million. When challenged that it would be impossible because you could find desktop copiers for less than $250 he replied; "I know, but all I have to do is find one customer and sell ONE!" Well, you only need one-"one". Go ahead, your search should not be a concern to anyone else. It's a wonder why you keep trying to defend it. It's the same wonder why at this point anyone would try to "help". No point in trying to expand your parameters. Again, an "angst" less - Merry Christmas! But of course-supply your own if need be.

liljoy -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/25/2005 8:41:18 PM)
i don't think this has anything to do with the fact that you're not bi or poly. i really can't understand where you came up with that! i am neither bi not poly and haven't had any problems with people taking umbrag to my posts, yet anyway. What people are upset about is your contratdictions and your refusal to listen. Honestly when i've seen your responses to posts i won'r if you've even bothered to read the post that you quoted. The examples given by fryresub and i weren't really different at all. Neither example included sex. The only difference is that my examples were part of a class. oh wait i just figured it out. The reason you aren't getting it is because you've never seen or been in a scene!! When a scene takes place everyone involved and anyone watching usually learn something. Ok i can't speak for everyone so i'll just say that Master and i always learn something from every scene we do or see. We learn what we may or may not want to try in the future if watching a scene. If it's us sceneing we learn what works and what might need to be done differently. i think you really should find your local group and get involved then you may be able to understand things better. lil_joy quote: ORIGINAL: candystripper i have to say, i tend to agree with sweetwhisper. i do think people knew what i meant, but took umbrage as if i insulted them because i am not more "mainstream"; not poly; not bisexual. This is only underscored for me when people ascribe bad motives to me, and disregard my apologies. Really, if what You do please You and harm no one, what difference does it make what someone writes on a message board? And what sort of friend takes such umbrage at the use of a phrase (later clarified, and not carrying any bad connotations) that they would publically drop a friend? Even if the friendship had to end due to one party's anger, why do it publically? candystripper

liljoy -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/25/2005 11:50:22 PM)
Merc, may i add to Your list she also wants Him to do all the cooking and hire a maid? lmbo lil_joy quote: ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth No heavy pain... No public play--- No bi-sexuality... No marks... Monagamy... Seeking financially independent, smart, mature, unattached male between 45-55, with no baggage, no history, who will not challenge any of my limits, who will only agree with me, who will be sensitive to my sensitivity and not make me cry, who accepts my intolerance, my lack of understanding, and my lack of appreciation for any perspective, any experience, or any challenge contrary to what I KNOW is true. Is it possible to find a qualifying partner at a BDSM site? Would this person more likely be a dom or sub?

themischievous1 -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/26/2005 12:33:56 AM)
Wow...just absolute wow. Maybe people didn't eat enough turkey yesterday, huh? I've heard it makes you mellow and sleepy. Guess not.. There's enough judgment floating around on this thread to potentially end aquaintance-ships over and that's pretty shocking, don'tcha think? This is a topic that is going to generate a wide range of views and everyone's thoughts on where they stand on the issue should be respected. If candy/pink considers her brand of monogamy to be something that is exemplary, meaningful, requiring of more dedication, etc., then it is. FOR HER. Allow her to embrace it and learn her truth on her own, her way. Candy is obviously new to the journey of D/s and BDSM. She's in research mode, hoping to experience all of this in real time. I can remember being exactly where she is, as I'm sure the rest of you do. I can remember thinking one thing and changing that entirely down the road as I grew in my submission and experienced this firsthand. lol.. I can also remember the occasional "authority" or experienced BDSM "old-timer" telling me that I was hardly submissive and was better off claiming to be a dominant. Yeah, right. So much for all of that wisdom, knowledge, and BDSM-guru crap. No one knows what the hell someone is or should be -- that's absolute bullshit. We all find that out for ourselves through this wonderful journey we are on and I hope to hell that everyone will allow this lady to travel hers and find out for herself. Offer support, compassion, and tolerance along the road if possible and try and remember the early days of your own submission/dominance. Judgment that degrades and harms like what we're witnessing on this thread just sucks and it's really unnecessary. Submissive women, especially submissive women new to real time are notorious for setting limits, claiming exceedingly strict boundaries, and attempting to control like hell what's going to happen in their beginning toward real time relationships. Candy's a D/s peach that hasn't been tasted, who is going to require a patient, extremely dominant type of man. He'll be a natural dominant and blow right through her protestations. She's learning her way and we need to support that -- not condemn. Monogamy/poly... whatever one embraces is "high" for them. The topic really isn't worthy of some of the hateful exchanges witnessed here. Maybe try some ham since turkey dinner didn't work for some of ya'll, huh guys? candy, I suggest you blow off the negative, snipey responses and try and forget. I'm sure there are several who will desire to completely forget this blown out of proportion "debate" within a few days. If not, they're taking themselves and this "lifestyle" way too damn seriously. -hugs- mischie

candystripper -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/26/2005 1:23:32 AM)
quote: Well, I don't know about everyone else...but my Christmas was really good. Had some friends over, my daughter let it be known for another year that yes, she rules this house ...we had some good food, good conversation Heck, the only thing missing was some good sex Irish Mist How i miss having a little one at Xmas; i am so looking forward to being a grandma; which by my kid's schedule will be about 5 years away, LOL. i am so glad you had a nice Xmas Irish Mist; you deserve it. candystripper

candystripper -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/26/2005 1:30:51 AM)
quote: What people are upset about is your contratdictions and your refusal to listen. lil joy Irish Mist and stef made similar comments. The best i can do is leave it for now, then re-read the thread and try and see what went wrong. Meantime, i can re-emphasize i respect everyone, irrespective of their orientation/kink. TY for posting, lil joy. You seem to be a lovely woman. candystripper

candystripper -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/26/2005 1:48:30 AM)
quote: candy, I suggest you blow off the negative, snipey responses and try and forget. I'm sure there are several who will desire to completely forget this blown out of proportion "debate" within a few days. If not, they're taking themselves and this "lifestyle" way too damn seriously. -hugs- mischie Ty so much for posting as you did; i myself said i thought people had made errors/assumptions/etc. But i was not in a good position to call bullst "bullst" because people in general (not everyone) were just beside themselves. If You've read the whole thread then you've seen two Men -- both of whom i admired -- publically announce They were ending our friendship. i was blown away. Now some people insist all the anger on this thread is my doing. i just posted to lil joy that i'd take some time and come back amd re-read the thread to see whether i could have handled things better. One thing that got alot of mention was "i did not take advice". The only advice i remember getting was to be bisexual and poly. i cannot do either one, so i did not find such suggestions terribly helpful. ^laughs^ my email in-box is full and the Men chasing me are a nice bunch; but a bit overwhelming in sheer numbers. Hope your Xmas was terrific. candystripper

ExistentialSteel -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/26/2005 2:23:43 AM)
Yeah, I stayed off this one for good reason. I agree with you, Themischievious1. Maybe it is a group dynamic thing about message boards of certain behaviors. This may seem ironic coming from someone who has posted a couple of hundred times since joining CM, but much of this could have been handled better in private instant messages where we tend to be less critical. I mean I have messaged with people so damn weird that my hair did a break dance on my scalp and, yet, I was able to keep a straight keyboard. We tend to be judgmental after raising our hands and talking to the whole class about something or someone.

candystripper -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/26/2005 2:38:01 AM)
quote: Yeah, I stayed off this one for good reason. I agree with you, Themischievious1. Maybe it is a group dynamic thing about message boards of certain behaviors. This may seem ironic coming from someone who has posted a couple of hundred times since joining CM, but much of this could have been handled better in private instant messages where we tend to be less critical. I mean I have messaged with people so damn weird that my hair did a break dance on my scalp and, yet, I was able to keep a straight keyboard. We tend to be judgmental after raising our hands and talking to the whole class about something or someone. ExSteel An interesting thought Sir. It is true, i think, that people have a harder time name-calling, etc. in an IM rather than on the boards. i'm not anxious to make my YIM ID public; but i would IM with anyone who asked re:this thread. Maybe someone will ask to IM and the anger level will go down a bit. BTW, i had to look twice to see if it in fact was my friend ExSteel, but now that i have, i must say i like the new avatar. Suits You Sir. Many Blessings in '06. candystripper

darkinshadows -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/26/2005 5:33:19 AM)
You would think people would have better things to do over holidays than to come onto a forum and waste time in such a hideous and embarressing way - especially with the claims of 'we do it, you don't.... '' If your 'doing it' - why aren't you 'doing it', instead of wasting your time pissing on others screens? Pink. I think that this thread has been fascinating from the point of view that it is indeed a learning experience. On how people present themselves and on the intollerent beaviour of the human mind. One thing that is totally obvious, is that you (as well as others - self included) come to a forum like this to learn. They learn by example and learn from guidence. And people have choices, they learn from strutting and ridicule and they learn lessons from intollerence and wisdom. Myself - I have learnt that those that write books, are less tollerent and have less to teach than they would like to be assumed. That one taught by a fearing fool, dances to the same tune and would teach others the same... no matter how individual the dance. That one that claims perfection, lives nothing more than a life of faults. This thread has been a great learning tool. Those reading it can see whom they can learn from, and whom they can trust and advance with from learning. The other thoughts can be looked upon - accepted and moved on from. People love to be the object of example - it satisfies the human condition, it plays and uplifts the soul and self. If makes people feel as though those watching, are being taught an example. Having fun at the expense of someone else, or discussing them with others on an aside makes people 'feel' superior. However, those that wish to teach, learn themselves. Those that don't learn - ridicule. Peace and Rapture

fyreredsub -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/26/2005 6:09:27 AM)
thank you liljoy...........(again)[:D] but your beating your head on a brick wall, at least half a dozen have stated that it is the contradictions..... imo,the Op isnt worth that much time,for you SEE it still rages on ,lol, even w/ out my posting, i wasted enuff time yesterday trying to get Op to understand why,what and how she stated things to me and it only got twisted to the point of my disgust. i prefer not to go there again besides[;)] so i'm on good behavior..........or else[;)] worse than corner timeshudders at the thought*** quote: ORIGINAL: liljoy i don't think this has anything to do with the fact that you're not bi or poly. i really can't understand where you came up with that! i am neither bi not poly and haven't had any problems with people taking umbrag to my posts, yet anyway. What people are upset about is your contratdictions and your refusal to listen. Honestly when i've seen your responses to posts i won'r if you've even bothered to read the post that you quoted. The examples given by fryresub and i weren't really different at all. Neither example included sex. The only difference is that my examples were part of a class. oh wait i just figured it out. The reason you aren't getting it is because you've never seen or been in a scene!! When a scene takes place everyone involved and anyone watching usually learn something. Ok i can't speak for everyone so i'll just say that Master and i always learn something from ever y scene we do or see. We learn what we may or may not want to try in the future if watching a scene. If it's us sceneing we learn what works and what might need to be done differently. i think you really should find your local group and get involved then you may be able to understand things better. lil_joy quote: ORIGINAL: candystripper i have to say, i tend to agree with sweetwhisper. i do think people knew what i meant, but took umbrage as if i insulted them because i am not more "mainstream"; not poly; not bisexual. This is only underscored for me when people ascribe bad motives to me, and disregard my apologies. Really, if what You do please You and harm no one, what difference does it make what someone writes on a message board? And what sort of friend takes such umbrage at the use of a phrase (later clarified, and not carrying any bad connotations) that they would publically drop a friend? Even if the friendship had to end due to one party's anger, why do it publically? candystripper

candystripper -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/26/2005 6:12:13 AM)
As always, wisdom from you, darkangel. i think i need to reflect on this thread; one area i mentioned was offering my friendship too easily. i will also contemplate the intolerance shown straight, monogamous women and why that might be. It may be that i never again mention my "orientation" on these boards. There may be more lessons to parse out of the thread; but it contains so much ugliness i don't plan to spend alot of time working at other questions i might ask. Yes, the holidays shocked me; people running to the pc to make some cruel remark then running back into the kitchen to finish dinner -- how could it escape them that these behaviors were inconsistent? TY darkangel. candystripper

fyreredsub -> RE: What is Monogamy? (12/26/2005 6:20:11 AM)
ah i see, as long as one was home alone, it is okay....oh lordie....[8D] its a shame half a dozen have tried to explain but to see the forest through the trees *shakes head and walks away* be happy candy,truly....(i sit here just amazed shaking my head.) some things will never be understood, i cant do this again today w/ you......... you have no idea how i wish for you to have a peaceful heart

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