RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (Full Version)

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stella41b -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/3/2008 11:14:34 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aszhrae

Girl thinks that perhaps its time to listen to her peers and forgo involvement in the forums any longer.
For being of the best intentions all girl seems to get is criticism.
Those that have answered with similar experiences, thank you for your replies at least some get it that girl was not talking about 'subspace' or scientific method.
Girl will not be back to the forums.



Hmm.. Are you a Martian who's come here looking for signs of intelligent life on Planet Earth? Is that it?

Is this some kind of message you are trying to pass on to us from Martians to Earthlings via these boards?



susie -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/4/2008 1:52:33 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aszhrae

What girl has done was use my own experiences as examples, asking if something similar that others have experienced as well. Some reason it always get turned around and girl is made out to be the badgirl.
It was supposed to be about discussion, but all it ever happens is further criticism.
Girl thinks that perhaps its time to listen to her peers and forgo involvement in the forums any longer.
For being of the best intentions all girl seems to get is criticism.
Those that have answered with similar experiences, thank you for your replies at least some get it that girl was not talking about 'subspace' or scientific method.
Girl will not be back to the forums.



It is a shame you are now behaving like a spoilt child and stamping your foot! There are lots of awesome people on this forum that you could learn so much from and believe me if you are going out there into the big bad world of searching for a partner / Mistress you really do have a lot to learn.



MistressRouge -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/4/2008 3:20:58 AM)

Head space whether Dominant or submissive, is usually the state of mind of excitement prior to the play/ session. Submissives usually describe this as an exciting trepidation, also some may prepare and carry out rituals of preparation also, and Dominants may also achieve headspace with play planning, laying out equipment, setting the scene etc.

This head space can also then merge into "sub space and Dominant space", once the play is in motion, more of an exchange of energy, sharing in the experience together.

As a Dominant I like to channel and hold the reins of the energy, thus creating a wonderful union of "space" sometimes a mixture of the "spaces".

Endorphins play their part in a different way, and usually result in subspace if a submissive is adept at receiving, registering and absorbing and bouncing back the energy to the Dominant, mainly totally emersimng themselves into the dynamic.

It is not all about pain and sensations regarding headspace either, some D/s activities commands, and even fetishes may also act as a trigger.

Sub/Dom/me drop is usually paramount a few days after the euphoric high, sometimes a week or longer for many.

What goes up, must come down so to speak, as a Dominant I have also experienced Domme drop, not a very nice place to be, but usually rectified with more play [:D]

To add, you can not WILL someone into any of the spaces, it has to be a mutual, genuine energy, usually boils down to enjoying one another to the point of tuning into each other mentally and physically.



SteveAndJaz -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/4/2008 3:37:48 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressRouge
an exchange of energy, sharing in the experience together.


To add, you can not WILL someone into any of the spaces, it has to be a mutual, genuine energy, usually boils down to enjoying one another to the point of tuning into each other mentally and physically.


I totally agree with this. How can one will another into a space that is unique to them. Like you say, its an exchange of energy and that energy has to be perfect to reach that plateau and will always come on spontaneously.
After a recent thread on full body orgasm, I started to research what it was but all I could find was 'tantric/spiritual'. Tantric temples offer to teach people how to achieve a full body orgasm but go on to say that it could take years and may never happen. The cost of this is over £200 an hour!!!.

Goes off wondering how much one could charge to give lessons in sub space[;)]



Aszhrae -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/4/2008 6:30:06 PM)

And those that would rather criticize than post anything actually helpful because all they know is destructive criticism. Gilr really does try to keep her negative opinions to her self or keep them to private dialogue to be discussed. But so regularly do some posts have anything nice to say that is helpful.
Fine, girl stamps her feet, stomps off, sulks or what have you. Need girl remind those that criticize, you're not perfect either.
Some are well intentioned in the their posts and to them girl thanks you. At least you are able to understand what it is girl was trying to explain. Which is difficult at the best of times.
Should never have used pain as my first example. Probably should have used something else as an example. Then again, someone would post a negativity about that as well.
So what if girl is back in the forum.
How else shall girl reply, Mass Telepathy or an advance form of Distance Scribing/Psychometry?

Yes girl is annoyed. And thank you so much for putting me in that dark place where girl does not give a crap about anything or anyone or even her self. Do us both a favor, keep criticism to the subject not about the OP.
Girl only asked for others to share similar experiences. My experiences are mine alone, but others have posted that they have experienced somewhat similar experiences.
If you must criticize someone, look in your own mirror first before turning to criticize others. You're not that perfect, None of us are.
Girl chose to share.
Don't like it, go elsewhere.
Is girl still in that dark place? Damn right girl is and if you are going to criticize me personally, then girl has but one thing to say, 'Get Stuffed'. If all you can do is criticize others to make your self feel better about your self, then you must be truly ugly on the inside.
My rant is over. Sure someone has some kind of criticism to post after this about the OP, but if you do, then this submissive is much greater than you will ever be because you have proven your self not worth this submissives efforts to get to know you.
Speaking of Mindsets that are Achievable, how about this one.
Personal experience: three metal skewers through the hand.
What girl would like done to her:  a row of piercings down the forearm, wanting someone to take pins and pierce them through ever centimeter of my back, metal clad my breasts with piercings. pierce my thighs with rings and hang chains from my hip to just above my ankle. It only stings if you allow it to, afterwards, it looks really neat.
400 belts across the ass, stings but after do not feel a thing.
Is girl masochistic? Hell yes. Is it a mindset? Hell yes. Is it achievable? always. Does girl divorce her mind from the pain? No. Does girl control the pain? Yes. Is it pleasurable? Hell yes. Makes me wet just thinking about it.
But just as pain can make me wet. Mindset can be established if girl allows my self to be overwhelmed, being out in nature, listening to nature around me, life in the woods, can make me wet if girl allows it.
Sitting down and letting go of all inhibitions and losing my self as a symphony plays, cane make me wet too.
Is the mindset achievable? Yes.
Have any of you experienced similar raptures in your life and experiences?
Care to share?
If you are here to criticize the OP, take your negativity elsewhere.
If you are here to give you opinion, share your insights, your experiences. You are most welcome to do so?

That's all for this post.
Keep your negative opinions and destructive criticisms to your self. Share them with someone else that cares.



thornhappy -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/4/2008 6:44:07 PM)

If you find that everyone is misinterpreting your posts, perhaps it is due to your communication style.  You've said that it is difficult for you to get used to a linear form of debate; however, that is practically manditory for forums or other online communication.

Exceptionally clear language is necessary to get your point across.

And last, but not least, you are going to be exposed to many, many opinions.  Not all will agree with you.  You can learn from the folks that have different views or experiences.

thornhappy



persephonee -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/4/2008 6:45:10 PM)

sigh.



DesFIP -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/4/2008 7:07:22 PM)

So what did we wicked people do, reach through the airwaves and forcibly push you into a closet? Hardly. Your emotions, your responsibility to handle them. Since you know you cannot tolerate ever being told you are mistaken, then don't put yourself in a place where this will happen. Don't have relationships or a job either since anytime you interact with others the possibility of being told you are in error is there. Don't drive a car for fear a police officer may have to tell you that you did something wrong.

BTW it doesn't matter how many times you insist that your mind and emotions are separate from your body, saying doesn't make it so. What it does make it is scary that you insist on being in a dissociated state, that you hate your physical self. This is as far from healthy as you can get.



oceanwynds -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/4/2008 7:28:27 PM)

quote:

My rant is over. Sure someone has some kind of criticism to post after this about the OP, but if you do, then this submissive is much greater than you will ever be because you have proven your self not worth this submissives efforts to get to know you.


There so much you could learn if you would just put your ego to the side for a bit. Instead of replying with attacks to those who might not understand what you are saying, try another method, without your ego.

quote:

Have any of you experienced similar raptures in your life and experiences?
Care to share


Sometimes we need to be quiet and pay attention, to what is being told to us. When one is so combative, I would expect others would find it hard to share their experiences with them.



oceanwynds



Aszhrae -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/4/2008 7:47:43 PM)

Always with the fingers pointing towards OP and not the subject. You just can not help your self can you. Does being judge take practice or does it come natural to you?

Dis-associative state while still maintaining awareness and coherency so that a reply can be spoken, takes practice. Its not a bad thing, just means an individual can endure a lot more upon their body. But, that is just me.
Girl was inquiring if others have managed to do the same also.

Some have replied, that when they are with another, they become one, energies shared, that they rise above the session. The motions of the dominant become routine, methodical; the submissive, the receptacle. Everything becomes so simple, the mindset of being one spirit takes over. Some girl can describe only that for them it was a magical experience. Perhaps even spiritual. Do they walk away drained? Probably not. Probably they walk away, closer that they have ever been, invigorated by the experience. They will return and try to attain that again.
Is this to be defined as dis-associative? It might be at first but after a while it becomes a comfort zone.

As for hating my physical self, you might be right, but girl may also be testing the limits of her physical self. How long can girl go before succumbing to the stimulus of constant discipline upon the physical self? Are you willing to go that far your self? Probably not. Girl would.



Aszhrae -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/4/2008 8:01:39 PM)

Girl did try that. Didn't do any good. All anyone could do was to criticize. There is a difference between constructive criticism and negative criticism. The negative criticism is always from the same people posting. Girl really does have to wonder if you have become so in sensed from having posted in the forums for so long that all you have left is the ability to criticize. Girl keeps pointing towards the subject and you keep pointing towards the OP.
Does the subject of the thread have to be in neon?
If you are going to continue to point out my flaws, you might want to first look at your self first. You are not that perfect. You may think so, but you're not. Girl is not perfect and never designated her self as being such.
Stay to the question.
Also, the first thread was only one example. Yet everyone dwells upon that example. Others have posted and offered further examples of something similar being achieved.
Stay to the question.
That is all girl has asked. But, nope. You just can not seem to do that. If you have not experienced such, why even post at all. You are not even asking for explanation. Instead you just post with criticism and point out the OPs flaws. Does it make you feel so much superior to do so?



oceanwynds -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/4/2008 8:09:17 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aszhrae

Girl did try that. Didn't do any good. All anyone could do was to criticize. There is a difference between constructive criticism and negative criticism. The negative criticism is always from the same people posting. Girl really does have to wonder if you have become so in sensed from having posted in the forums for so long that all you have left is the ability to criticize. Girl keeps pointing towards the subject and you keep pointing towards the OP.
Does the subject of the thread have to be in neon?
If you are going to continue to point out my flaws, you might want to first look at your self first. You are not that perfect. You may think so, but you're not. Girl is not perfect and never designated her self as being such.
Stay to the question.
Also, the first thread was only one example. Yet everyone dwells upon that example. Others have posted and offered further examples of something similar being achieved.
Stay to the question.
That is all girl has asked. But, nope. You just can not seem to do that. If you have not experienced such, why even post at all. You are not even asking for explanation. Instead you just post with criticism and point out the OPs flaws. Does it make you feel so much superior to do so?


Best of luck to you. May you find what it is you are seeking.

blessings
oceanwynds.



susie -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/5/2008 1:13:26 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aszhrae

And those that would rather criticize than post anything actually helpful because all they know is destructive criticism. Gilr really does try to keep her negative opinions to her self or keep them to private dialogue to be discussed. But so regularly do some posts have anything nice to say that is helpful.
Fine, girl stamps her feet, stomps off, sulks or what have you. Need girl remind those that criticize, you're not perfect either.
Some are well intentioned in the their posts and to them girl thanks you. At least you are able to understand what it is girl was trying to explain. Which is difficult at the best of times.
Should never have used pain as my first example. Probably should have used something else as an example. Then again, someone would post a negativity about that as well.
So what if girl is back in the forum.
How else shall girl reply, Mass Telepathy or an advance form of Distance Scribing/Psychometry?

Yes girl is annoyed. And thank you so much for putting me in that dark place where girl does not give a crap about anything or anyone or even her self. Do us both a favor, keep criticism to the subject not about the OP.
Girl only asked for others to share similar experiences. My experiences are mine alone, but others have posted that they have experienced somewhat similar experiences.
If you must criticize someone, look in your own mirror first before turning to criticize others. You're not that perfect, None of us are.
Girl chose to share.
Don't like it, go elsewhere.
Is girl still in that dark place? Damn right girl is and if you are going to criticize me personally, then girl has but one thing to say, 'Get Stuffed'. If all you can do is criticize others to make your self feel better about your self, then you must be truly ugly on the inside.
My rant is over. Sure someone has some kind of criticism to post after this about the OP, but if you do, then this submissive is much greater than you will ever be because you have proven your self not worth this submissives efforts to get to know you.
Speaking of Mindsets that are Achievable, how about this one.
Personal experience: three metal skewers through the hand.
What girl would like done to her:  a row of piercings down the forearm, wanting someone to take pins and pierce them through ever centimeter of my back, metal clad my breasts with piercings. pierce my thighs with rings and hang chains from my hip to just above my ankle. It only stings if you allow it to, afterwards, it looks really neat.
400 belts across the ass, stings but after do not feel a thing.
Is girl masochistic? Hell yes. Is it a mindset? Hell yes. Is it achievable? always. Does girl divorce her mind from the pain? No. Does girl control the pain? Yes. Is it pleasurable? Hell yes. Makes me wet just thinking about it.
But just as pain can make me wet. Mindset can be established if girl allows my self to be overwhelmed, being out in nature, listening to nature around me, life in the woods, can make me wet if girl allows it.
Sitting down and letting go of all inhibitions and losing my self as a symphony plays, cane make me wet too.
Is the mindset achievable? Yes.
Have any of you experienced similar raptures in your life and experiences?
Care to share?
If you are here to criticize the OP, take your negativity elsewhere.
If you are here to give you opinion, share your insights, your experiences. You are most welcome to do so?

That's all for this post.
Keep your negative opinions and destructive criticisms to your self. Share them with someone else that cares.



I had to highlight a couple of points you made in your response to me.

1. If words on a forum can have such an effect on you then you should really consider posting at all. These are open fora for anyone to comment. Get used to it.

2. The only person here I can see claiming to be near perfect is you. I have never suggested I am perfect but like a lot of people it is something that we can work towards.

3. I have never seen the "submissive issue" as being some kind of competition. I am a better submissive than you really makes me laugh and until you realise that everyone is different and lives differently you will never be comfortable in finding another Mistress.

From your response to me I see more instability than anything else. Yes that is my personal opinion and one that I am perfectly entitled to have. I really think you need some help with your issues. Do not assume that there is something special about having skewers or piercings. You are not alone in going through those things. What is different is the way you view them.



Twicehappy2x -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/5/2008 4:22:26 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aszhrae

so regularly do some posts have anything nice to say that is helpful.
Fine, girl stamps her feet, stomps off, sulks or what have you. Need girl remind those that criticize, you're not perfect either.

Some are well intentioned in the their posts and to them girl thanks you. At least you are able to understand what it is girl was trying to explain.

Girl only asked for others to share similar experiences. My experiences are mine alone, but others have posted that they have experienced somewhat similar experiences.

If you must criticize someone, look in your own mirror first before turning to criticize others. You're not that perfect, None of us are.

Don't like it, go elsewhere.

Damn right girl is and if you are going to criticize me personally, then girl has but one thing to say, 'Get Stuffed'. If all you can do is criticize others to make your self feel better about your self, then you must be truly ugly on the inside.

Sure someone has some kind of criticism to post after this about the OP, but if you do, then this submissive is much greater than you will ever be because you have proven your self not worth this submissives efforts to get to know you.

Have any of you experienced similar raptures in your life and experiences?
Care to share?

If you are here to criticize the OP, take your negativity elsewhere.

If you are here to give you opinion, share your insights, your experiences. You are most welcome to do so?

Keep your negative opinions and destructive criticisms to your self. Share them with someone else that cares.

Stay to the question.

That is all girl has asked. But, nope. You just can not seem to do that. If you have not experienced such, why even post at all. You are not even asking for explanation. Instead you just post with criticism and point out the OPs flaws. Does it make you feel so much superior to do so


A child getting red in the face, stomping their feet and loudly declaiming statements of a nature similar to those below is bad . It is truly an ugly scene when a full grown adult does it.
 
"I don't care what you say! I'm going to do what i want and you can't stop me!"
 
"If you do not want to play my game by my rules get off my playground!"
 
"I only want to play with Susie because she likes me and lets me make the rules of the game"
 
Temper tantrums are disruptive or undesirable behaviors or emotional outbursts displayed in response to unmet needs or desires. They may also refer to an inability to control emotions due to frustration or difficulty in expressing or obtaining a particular desire or getting one's way.
 
Aszhrae, as i've quoted above you have repeatedly thanked those who agreed with you for posting, note, as i and others have; you only thanked those who agreed with you or posted like experiences.
 
Taking it further you have figuratively thrown repeated tantrums at those who disagreed with you or posted opposing view points. Telling them effectively "if you won't play the game the way i want get out of the play ground you meanie ". 
 
Then proceeded to call them names, tell them individually and collectively they are not nice and you refuse to play with them any more.
 
I see by your profile you are 42 years old, a bit old for temper tantrums.
 
How about learning to appreciate all those who took the time to post their experiences instead of only those who agreed with you.
 
This is a public forum, folks come here to share and to debate, hopefully to learn.
 
This is not however  a place you can simply order those who do not agree with you to get off your playground. That is highly inappropriate behavior.
 
It appears to me, after perusing many of your posts, you come here, make your posts then get angry each and every time somebody disagrees with you or even attempts to offer advice that does not coincide with what you want to hear.
 
Seems like you post here just to have someplace in your life where you do get your way, then when it does not work out in that way you react like an ill behaved three year old.
 
Instead of throwing these continual temper tantrums, which after all only serve to frustrate you further, perhaps seek some counseling and try to discover where this tide of frustration is springing from. Then take steps to correct your life or at least your manner of dealing with these issues.  



xxblushesxx -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/5/2008 6:42:39 AM)

Ok, I'll say it.
Passive agressive.
People were kind to you, Op, but disagreed with you.
You attacked them, but found a way to make it seem (to yourself) that you were being attacked.
This is not the first thread you have done this on.
There are one or two others around here that do the same thing; ask for input, and then continually negate it when it's not what they want to hear.
You should form a club.
I do feel for you. But probably not for the reasons you think I should.



scarlethiney -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/5/2008 7:06:10 AM)

MistressRouge,

Thanks for posting a comment that is intelligent, thoughtful and simply about your experience based on the "statement" in the Op's original post.

I for one find it  quite tedious that so many threads dissolve into bitter, snippy commentary aimed at being judgmental.  Its amazing that so many have the arrogance to tell anyone person that the feelings they have are "incorrect or wrong".
When the OP points out that instead of intelligent discourse on the subject most posts are judging the OP and or being critical of what she experienced and how wrong she is shes told don't post if you don't like it. That's pretty childish and bullying. I think the Op showed great restraint in answering many who are habitually argumentative.
No one has to agree with any one on here. EVERYONE is entitled to have an opinion and no not one of you needs to agree with it. However, you do have the choice to be adult and post a statement devoid  of condemnation or personal insults. When your comments become judgmental, biting and condemning then you are no longer posting an opinion your being  exactly what you accuse the Op of being.......................emotional and not very adult.

scarlet




AquaticSub -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/5/2008 8:34:09 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aszhrae

That's all for this post.
Keep your negative opinions and destructive criticisms to your self. Share them with someone else that cares.



While you won't be posting anything else (opps, you did [;)])...

I find I rarely learn anything new when all I get are people agreeing with me. I truly do not understand your venom at those who have responded to you. For the most part posters have taken issue with your ideas and, a few times, your communication style which is difficult to understand.

Your responses in this thread, starting with the first post by LA, have come down hard on those who didn't agree yet you invited all opinions. Indeed you refered to her post as a "nice kill".

If you feel this post is horrid criticism by a wicked witch of a poster than perhaps you need to be a safer-space style forum. For the record, that is not intended as an insult though I'm sure someone will complain about me saying it.



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/5/2008 10:04:52 AM)

She's worse than passive aggressive, she's a martyr who thinks she's too deep for us to understand.  Sadly, they tend to make the worst proselytizers.

This is me, leaving this thread.



SassySarijane -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/5/2008 2:12:03 PM)

How sad that a "mature" adult woman can't handle being disagreed with and feels she must lash out at all who don't share her view. I was amazed to see by her profile she is older than me as she certainly hasn't acted like it.



SlaveIndigochild -> RE: Mindset: Achievable or Just an Illusion? (12/5/2008 5:46:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aszhrae

There are threads where the subject has come up about submissives being in sub-space, a space where everything seems to finally connect in that moment of the present where understanding and simply being.

Something has come to mind recently and girl has been thinking about it often. Not sure if it has anything to do with the so-called 'sub-space','dom-space' or what have you.

You sit, you're alone, a private place where you can focus your self on the goings on around you. You breathe, either using Ch'i breathing or Tao breathing or simply you do yoga.
You become calm. You become centered and eventually your thoughts become focused. Clarity comes to your thoughts and doubts ease away into nothingness.
You are there, distant but aware.
You have practiced this enough times that no matter where you are or what you are doing, you can get there again.

Pain, it stings, your instincts are to protect your self, but your will has you endure. It stings once more, your emotions begin to surface, by will you control them turn them inward. You strengthen your self so your body can endure even more. It stings again, a little more, a little longer. Your mind wants to shut it out but you continue by force of will to endure even more. You sigh as you become used to the sting. You become sensitive, your skin reacts to the lightest of touches. You become aware. You are wet, the pain has become pleasure. You want more.

The mindset, Pain is Pleasure, you are now focused on doing what would give you the greatest pleasure. You open your eyes, your dominant is smiling, there in their eyes a fire burn. There hand lifts to pet your head and your shoulder.

This was an example of a personal experience years ago.
What girl would like to know, has anyone managed to attain a similar experience?
If so, care to post your experience?
Invite analysis as well or even skepticism.


i don't wish to sound impertinent however i just feel that the way you language your opening post and indeed the way you refer to yourself in your profile is depersonalising. i know it could be taken as the language of protocol but you have gone on to depersonalise and separate yourself from your experience. Sometimes experience is simply that.....inexplicable pure experience.



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