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BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 3:04:20 AM   
PolishgirlatKSA


Posts: 3
Joined: 12/6/2008
Status: offline 		BDSM A Reality or a Dream?
 
I thought a lot before writing this. I am Polish but I am abroad working for a British company. I have been thinking about BDSM for three years since I started knowing a boyfriend back home and he started introducing me to what he called BDSM.
He used to ask me to stay home naked and when he is around I should walk on my hands and knees like a dog. Somtimes I laughed and other times I felt this is stupid and would stop it.
 
What I loved in this relationship two basic things. The first is rough sex he used to do with me, the other is the wonderful real spankings I got and the tears that used to roll from my eyes. Sometimes I liked it more when he did it in the presence of a mutual male friend of ours, and when that friend shared sometimes in spanking me.
 
But all the rest of the Taboo are not real. I asked seven of my girlfriends who did it or used to do it , and they all agreed with me.
 
I do not say that there are no real sadists and masochists, all I am saying they are very few. On Collarme, you meet hundreds of men pretending they are ones, and you could be more than sure that they have not even spanked a girl, while you meet others that think they will find a girl the second day he sends a note to her asking her to meet him. Others are frustrated becasue they spend hours and hours trying to find someone real.
 
I myself made my advert casue I had so many questions to be answered related to BDSM and spanking. Some of those who responded wrote asking when can we meet, proving they did not even complete reading my advert, as I mentioned I am abroad and may meet during my summer holidays, that I need now a friend older and experienced in BDSM and spanking to write to me.
 
Some I thought real and started writing and I started sharing some very private things in my life, even sent pictures, but then their e-mails starter getting shorter and shorter until they were two lines , so of course I stopped writing.
 
I need other opinions and I hope they are serious. This wen has been built beautifully for people of different minds to talk and exchange ideas and know each other.
Maria
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 3:09:10 AM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		It's real.  Very fucking real...

_____________________________



(in reply to PolishgirlatKSA)
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RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 4:39:08 AM   
WilliamAugustine


Posts: 7
Joined: 8/26/2008
Status: offline 		With you Maria? This is just my dream. ;)

(in reply to Aileen1968)
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RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 5:02:52 AM   
lally3


Posts: 595
Joined: 3/4/2008
Status: offline 		you know hun, my firm belief is this:  the moment you stop thinking about it as BDSM and kink and start thinking about it as just a part of the relationship you seek you project that out, it shows and eventually someone will come along who is D who just happens to enjoy BDSM as part and parcel of the relationship they seek too.

its a way of being, that for a number of people is just that, it cant be separated from who and what they are, they think and feel it every day.

its no different to being vanilla - its just what we are and not so much what we do - lots of people seeking dont 'do' anything for long intervals because they have noone to 'do' it with - doesnt stop them from being who they are for a minute.

so, yes its very real - its who we are - youre just in for the long haul like the rest of us until someone comes along who will make it all fall into place for you.

_____________________________

even doves have pride (Prince)

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RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 5:30:55 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		My own BDSM dream is to dominate a bunch of horny-ass punks by harvesting their emails on a kinky social network, by sending them an offline address so we can talk about BDSM and spankings "in total privacy."  Hey, it works on Facebook.  Check it out.

http://blog.wordtothewise.com/2008/04/address-harvesting-through-social-networks/


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to lally3)
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RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 5:34:41 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

My own BDSM dream is to dominate a bunch of horny-ass punks by harvesting their emails on a kinky social network, by sending them an offline address so we can talk about BDSM and spankings "in total privacy."  Hey, it works on Facebook.  Check it out.

http://blog.wordtothewise.com/2008/04/address-harvesting-through-social-networks/


LMAO RM 

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RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 5:44:14 AM   
sobayblackmaster


Posts: 108
Joined: 11/16/2008
Status: offline 		isn't  part of all this the allure, the ambivalence? isn't it about pushing limits, from within and without? maybe people-whether Dom/sub or Master/slave just need the right partner/chemistry to open up that part of themselves.

(in reply to IrishMist)
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RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 6:34:58 AM   
pompeii


Posts: 934
Joined: 1/4/2007
From: Silicon Valley, San Jose, California
Status: offline 		It's real, and it's not real. Fantasies are real and they're not. Desires are real, and they're not. Conversations are real, and they're not. On the topic of the conversations petering out, realize there's a half life of about a half dozen emails for any conversation with a person who remains a stranger to you. Basically, after about a half dozen emails, the conversation will have gotten to the point of meeting, or not. If it gets to the point of meeting, which is rare, as you've found out, even for a gorgeous woman (which surprises me being a regular joe), then there's plenty to discuss.

However, if you don't meet after about a half-dozen emails, well then, there's just not much more to say after a while. Especially if the first two words from him were "wanna f**k?"  

Given all that, and subtracting out what appears to be obvious attention-getting beauty, your experiences are quite normal. YMMV of course.


(in reply to sobayblackmaster)
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RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 6:46:22 AM   
MarsBonfire


Posts: 1034
Joined: 3/6/2005
Status: offline 		From the sound of it, you tried some things and liked them, and you tried others, and found they did not work for you. That is pretty much everyone's experience. Those who are into BDSM don't immediately practice everything... Like good food, or music, there is lots of variety, and everyone has their favorites.

Basically, you are asking the age old online question: "Are these people "real" in their desire for this?" The answer is, yes, they are. But their desires, and yours, might be incompatible. Learn to filter, young lady.

(in reply to pompeii)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 6:53:55 AM   
CatdeMedici


Posts: 2257
Joined: 10/20/2008
Status: offline 		It is what you define it to be---to some it is a dream/fantasy, for others it is life---for Me like beth said, it is to Me as My blue eyes--a key part of who I am.

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I am the Cat, holder of the whip and chair.

"Let's see-whips, dips, chains, chips, yep sounds like a party to Me!"

(in reply to PolishgirlatKSA)
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RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 6:54:24 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		Damn.  I wish I could meet the girl who posed for the pics.  

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to MarsBonfire)
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RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 7:04:04 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Damn.  I wish I could meet the girl who posed for the pics.  


DS and Red hit it on the head.
I'm not going to mention the thread that got pulled last weekend.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 7:14:54 AM   
pompeii


Posts: 934
Joined: 1/4/2007
From: Silicon Valley, San Jose, California
Status: offline
quote:

I wish I could meet the girl who posed for the pics. 


I hadn't read the profile, just looked at the thumbnail next to the original post. Having read the profile, I instantly see what you mean.
We've been snookered ...

I revise my answer:
Yes "Maria". It's real. Very real. Send $10 to me and a SASE and I'll prove how real it really is. xxoxx

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
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RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 9:43:47 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Damn.  I wish I could meet the girl who posed for the pics.  

You're in luck!  She lives in Colorado!  But... she's nilla... and gay.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 6:46:22 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Damn.  I wish I could meet the girl who posed for the pics.  

You're in luck!  She lives in Colorado!  But... she's nilla... and gay.



That's okay.  Bet it takes less than an hour for my Domliness to "convert" her for life.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 6:54:11 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		LOL... I knew I forgot something in Colorado.

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No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


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RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 7:12:26 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		A full relationship cannot be maintained on nothing but indulging of sensation play. If that's all that constituted your criteria for a search for a partner, then of course the relationship wouldn't last. But who is responsible for choosing a partner that unwisely? You.

Learn to select partners on less shallow criteria, on shared moral values and compatible vanilla activities as well as sex and play and you'll have a better chance at a successful relationship. As there are many of us here who looked for something more than just a liking for spanking, and who have long lasting relationships, obviously a relationship including bdsm can work.

You are the only constant in all your relationships, if they all fail then it is your fault.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to Lockit)
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RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 8:55:58 PM   
slavegirljoy


Posts: 1207
Joined: 11/6/2006
From: North Carolina, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PolishgirlatKSA

BDSM A Reality or a Dream?
 
I do not say that there are no real sadists and masochists, all I am saying they are very few. On Collarme, you meet hundreds of men pretending they are ones, and you could be more than sure that they have not even spanked a girl, while you meet others that think they will find a girl the second day he sends a note to her asking her to meet him. Others are frustrated becasue they spend hours and hours trying to find someone real. 
 
Maria


It's too bad that you're having such a hard time finding a "real" sadist because they really do exist.  There may be some pretenders on CM, but my Master is a "real" sadist and i met Him on CM.  And, if you ever happen to visit North Carolina, He would be more than happy to let you feel just how real His sadism is.  He does much more than spank but, when He does spank, He leaves marks.  BTW, there are other sites to search for someone into BD/SM, if you're not having any luck on CM.
 
joy
Master David's erotic-domestic slave 

_____________________________

Don't ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive. ~Dr. Howard Thurman

(in reply to PolishgirlatKSA)
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RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 9:08:48 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		It depends on what you mean by "few."  As a percentage of the general population, sure, there are few sadists and masochists.  In absolute numbers, there are millions.  Maybe the problem is that you have not met enough of them in Riyadh.

And Collarme profiles are not a good sample to work with.  Yes, there are many "real sadists" on Collarme (the guy with the elephants in his avatar is one of them), but there are many more profiles from fakes, hackers, lonely men at night, and God knows who else.

quote:

ORIGINAL: PolishgirlatKSA

I do not say that there are no real sadists and masochists, all I am saying they are very few. On Collarme, you meet hundreds of men pretending they are ones, and you could be more than sure that they have not even spanked a girl, while you meet others that think they will find a girl the second day he sends a note to her asking her to meet him. Others are frustrated becasue they spend hours and hours trying to find someone real.

(in reply to PolishgirlatKSA)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong - 12/10/2008 11:57:05 PM   
MarcEsadrian


Posts: 852
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PolishgirlatKSA
BDSM A Reality or a Dream? Hope I am wrong.


It's not without a sense of accompanying irony that while reading this post I recollect mentioning the trend of "sock-puppeting" today in another thread.

Edited to add: And what if reality is nothing but a big cosmic wet dream? Then BDSM is really screwed.




< Message edited by MarcEsadrian -- 12/11/2008 12:11:05 AM >

(in reply to PolishgirlatKSA)
Profile   Post #: 20
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