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This is a vent, What do you think ? *UPDATED* - 12/12/2008 4:48:34 PM   
submissvelyhis


Posts: 15
Joined: 12/8/2008
Status: offline 		 I know my mistakes now, so its my fault I end up feeling this way ! So from now on I know what not to do.
 
 
 

< Message edited by submissvelyhis -- 12/12/2008 5:12:37 PM >
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? - 12/12/2008 4:53:55 PM   
KyttynTheMynx


Posts: 4880
Joined: 5/10/2006
From: Moosecrotch, Va
Status: offline 		I really am saying this with no snark whatsoever, so please dont be offended but...

Stop putting out?  Let the guy work for the Southern goodies.  Maybe after he gets to know ya, he wont run after gettin a lil sugar.


_____________________________

Hibbie's Hottie

The next time you think I give a fuck, remember the 3 F's... Unless you are Feeding me, Financing me, or Fucking me, I don't give a fuck!!

"Kyttyn: The Other White Meat!" - DRH

10 Miles of Hot Chocolate Lovin'.

(in reply to submissvelyhis)
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? - 12/12/2008 4:55:35 PM   
SomethingCatchy


Posts: 796
Joined: 7/29/2008
Status: offline 		What Kyttyn said, and - is this online? You may have better luck with a local group. Have you tried going to munches? 

(in reply to KyttynTheMynx)
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? - 12/12/2008 4:59:36 PM   
submissvelyhis


Posts: 15
Joined: 12/8/2008
Status: offline 		I dont just put out. I dont do anything sexual till a ouple of weeks after talking, I think they are just fake.

(in reply to SomethingCatchy)
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? - 12/12/2008 5:01:08 PM   
agentlespirit


Posts: 40
Joined: 11/23/2008
From: Florida
Status: offline 		i understand what you are feeling..i have felt it before as well..but the main point to remember here is that somewhere out there is a Master thinking the same thing....it is not when you will find Him, it is when you will find each other.  Be proud of your submissiveness, be proud of all the qualities you possess, be proud of the life you have built for yourself....that pride and satisfaction will shine through and is much more attractive that desperation and a "woe is me" attitude.  If you are just meeting Those who run away after they "got off", perhaps that is all they wanted anyway.  And how long after you meet these Men do they get off?  you need to take some real time and get to know someone..not just their likes and dislikes in the D/s vein, but as a person.  Discuss everyday life and activities and goals with them.  i am sure that Masters feel the same way that i do....i like it much better when i see someone wanting to get to know me in more than a sexual way.  The sexual way is, of course, important, but should be coming long after you first meet.  Talk together, laugh together, philosophize together, daydream together....find out different things you may have in common outside the lifestyle....become friends before you decide to submit....just take your time....usually if it happens quickly, it does not last long.  Hope i have not frustrated you any further but i just wanted to express my feelings to you in hopes of making you feel a little bit better.
Now, i have a question....of anyone....how do i make that darn vanilla symbol by my name disappear!!!???

(in reply to submissvelyhis)
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? - 12/12/2008 5:03:45 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		Dont talk to them if they get all demanding, sexual or want to Cam. dont give them your yahoo just cause they ask.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to submissvelyhis)
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? - 12/12/2008 5:06:01 PM   
submissvelyhis


Posts: 15
Joined: 12/8/2008
Status: offline 		just so you all know, I dont have a poor me thing going on. I reall am just venting and do realize my mistakes.

(in reply to agentlespirit)
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? - 12/12/2008 5:08:28 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: submissvelyhis

I dont just put out. I dont do anything sexual till a ouple of weeks after talking,


A couple of weeks.  A couple of weeks?!?!?  Oy vey.
 
Try not doing anything sexual until you've been talking for a couple of months.  Not on cam or IM either.  In person.  That might work out better for you.

_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to submissvelyhis)
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? - 12/12/2008 5:14:13 PM   
Timoty


Posts: 15
Joined: 11/1/2008
Status: offline 		It is hard for me (I know I am quite a bit older and perhaps that does have a tendency to alter the concept of time.) to imagine that you have given your heart to be broken after only a couple weeks. In your reply, you speak as if a couple weeks is a long time. No matter how much you communicate after two weeks you are only scratching the surface. Only learning where the toilets are. Focus on the depth and intent of the relationship, protect yourself, explore safely and you have a chance. A great zen philosopher once said, "The best way to find something is to stop looking for it." Stop trying so hard and just learn and enjoy. It will happen.

(in reply to submissvelyhis)
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? - 12/12/2008 5:14:56 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan
Try not doing anything sexual until you've been talking for a couple of months.  Not on cam or IM either.  In person.  That might work out better for you.

I think you're feeling burned, Syl.  If a woman waited two months to go to third base with me, I would think she wasn't into me, and I'd put her in the just-friends category.

To the OP: Yes, there are a lot of horny, online-only wanker guys.  On the other hand, I don't think most men find "needy" and "overwrought" to be attractive qualities.  You might want to treat male suitors as "potentially a good friend" instead of "maybe he's the One OMGOMGOMG."


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? *UPDATED* - 12/12/2008 5:21:46 PM   
CarrieO


Posts: 2432
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: submissvelyhis

 I know my mistakes now, so its my fault I end up feeling this way ! So from now on I know what not to do. 
 


Good...and what have you learned? 
 
Get out into the community and meet people. Not Doms or titles....people. 
 
Take your time and explore. Your profile gives the impression that you don't really know what you want or where you're going. Why not take the time to figure that out then worry about meeting Mr. Wonder-Dom. 
 
Good luck

_____________________________

"No matter what happens in the kitchen, never apologize"~Julia Child~


(in reply to submissvelyhis)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? - 12/12/2008 5:21:56 PM   
submissvelyhis


Posts: 15
Joined: 12/8/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan
Try not doing anything sexual until you've been talking for a couple of months.  Not on cam or IM either.  In person.  That might work out better for you.

I think you're feeling burned, Syl.  If a woman waited two months to go to third base with me, I would think she wasn't into me, and I'd put her in the just-friends category.

To the OP: Yes, there are a lot of horny, online-only wanker guys.  On the other hand, I don't think most men find "needy" and "overwrought" to be attractive qualities.  You might want to treat male suitors as "potentially a good friend" instead of "maybe he's the One OMGOMGOMG."



Yes, you are right, and now that I have been thinking about it, I realize and see where I have made my mistakes.

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? - 12/12/2008 5:23:30 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		I have discovered, and I discovered it the hard way, that once you stop looking, what you have been seeking tends to arrive if not on your doorstep then in close proximity at a time which is good for you. It has something to do with not being able to see the forest for the trees. My last two relationship/marriage mistakes cost me my 15 year old son and over AU$2.5 million. Stopping looking and just plodding along getting on with life and taking things one day at a time, my wife and I met by chance (or was it) we have been married for some time now and things get better and better..(Pity I don't seem to be able to do that with slaves but I also know the remedy which I am working on too)..  

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to RedMagic1)
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? *UPDATED* - 12/12/2008 5:27:45 PM   
FLMaster45


Posts: 4
Joined: 1/25/2007
Status: offline 		What are you looking for?

If you are looking for an "online Dom" - then I guess you got what you wanted.  Forgive me for not being warm and fuzzy, but "online BDSM" is like "Jumbo shrimp" or "Compassionate conservative" or "Military intelligence."  It's an oxymoron.

If you are looking for a real-life Dom, what the hell are you doing having cybersex?

And I'm sorry to say this, but most men aren't intersted in women who weigh 275 pounds.  I'm not saying you lose any worth or dignity as a person because of your appearance, nor that there aren't some men who prefer larger women.  But you cut your odds way down.  And whether it's your "fault" or not, it is what it is.

(in reply to submissvelyhis)
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? *UPDATED* - 12/12/2008 5:33:42 PM   
submissvelyhis


Posts: 15
Joined: 12/8/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FLMaster45

What are you looking for?

If you are looking for an "online Dom" - then I guess you got what you wanted.  Forgive me for not being warm and fuzzy, but "online BDSM" is like "Jumbo shrimp" or "Compassionate conservative" or "Military intelligence."  It's an oxymoron.

If you are looking for a real-life Dom, what the hell are you doing having cybersex?

And I'm sorry to say this, but most men aren't intersted in women who weigh 275 pounds.  I'm not saying you lose any worth or dignity as a person because of your appearance, nor that there aren't some men who prefer larger women.  But you cut your odds way down.  And whether it's your "fault" or not, it is what it is.


Once again , I realize now I have no reason to be upset, yes I got what I wanted, ok, I get it. Thanks. Well I guess I wont be worthy untill I lose weight, good to know I'm wasting my time, would it be better if I lied about it ?

(in reply to FLMaster45)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? *UPDATED* - 12/12/2008 5:35:54 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FLMaster45
And I'm sorry to say this, but most men aren't intersted in women who weigh 275 pounds.  I'm not saying you lose any worth or dignity as a person because of your appearance, nor that there aren't some men who prefer larger women.  But you cut your odds way down.  And whether it's your "fault" or not, it is what it is.

WTF????  Giving advice means you point out something the person isn't noticing, that could be helpful.  Do you really think the OP isn't aware of the fact that a lot of men aren't attracted to heavier women?  Were you poking at an insecurity because you are volunteering to provide emotional support and athletic coaching for a new exercise program?  Or was this comment just gratuitous assholosity?


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to FLMaster45)
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? - 12/12/2008 5:36:49 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan
Try not doing anything sexual until you've been talking for a couple of months.  Not on cam or IM either.  In person.  That might work out better for you.

I think you're feeling burned, Syl.  If a woman waited two months to go to third base with me, I would think she wasn't into me, and I'd put her in the just-friends category.


Really?  Because I generally don't get to "third" until I've known and talked to someone for at least two months.  Minimum.  Spyder, my fiance who I've been with for six years, and I knew each other for three or four months and had been spending time together almost daily for a month before we even kissed. 
 
I require a significant investment of time from a partner.  I'm a valuable commodity and he or she has to show me that they recognize it.  I'm fairly sure none of my partners have ever questioned whether or not I was "into" them.  But that's just how I roll.

_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to RedMagic1)
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RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? *UPDATED* - 12/12/2008 5:37:38 PM   
HalfShyHalfWild


Posts: 150
Joined: 2/11/2008
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FLMaster45

And I'm sorry to say this, but most men aren't intersted in women who weigh 275 pounds.  I'm not saying you lose any worth or dignity as a person because of your appearance, nor that there aren't some men who prefer larger women.  But you cut your odds way down.  And whether it's your "fault" or not, it is what it is.


I've typed about 30 responses so far and I'm pretty sure all of them would get me banned. Feel more superior about yourself yet though? "Takes a big man" to kick someone when they are down.

(in reply to FLMaster45)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? *UPDATED* - 12/12/2008 5:45:33 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		There's no arguing with your success, Syl.  I must admit I'm a bit distracted now, as I disklike reading slimeposts written by men whose idea of domination over women is the emotional equivalent of kicking puppies.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to HalfShyHalfWild)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: This is a vent, What do you think ? *UPDATED* - 12/12/2008 5:47:11 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline 		S'ok Red.  Just go visit my MySpace page.  My playlist has new goodies.  It'll cure what ails ya. 

_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 20
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