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What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 11:34:10 AM   
Vanessacherry


Posts: 18
Joined: 12/13/2008
Status: offline 		I was recently reading a thread that had the following response to a poor sub with a broken heart due to being mistreated by her "Master".  This reply got me thinking and I decided to start this new topic for us new "Subs" starting out in our relationships with our new Masters, or those looking for a Master.

Here is the reply
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Some very good "words  of wisdom" for you here. Don't take anyone who calls Himself a "Dominant" or "Master"as such until He has shown you that He IS indeed such a One! Don't give up on yourself, your needs are just that,  you will find the One you seek, tho, it is said,"you have to kiss a lot of frogs, before you find your Prince"!
    I would suggest you alter your current Collarme profile to reflect your new status; free and looking, and take more time this time around. The Lifestyle can be a most rewarding one, when you find the right "One". I wish you well in your search!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------

My question is this, how do you know if someone is a "True Master"? 
The more detailed you are the better.

Thank you in advance,

Vanessa Cherry
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 11:51:41 AM   
Cdub2U


Posts: 69
Joined: 9/20/2006
Status: offline 		 

My opinion and mine alone, "A Master/Mistress is a Master only if He/She has a slave that chooses to call the person Master."

As for myself I have been "called" Master but never introduce myself as Master...  I tend to use my name, and let the sub/slave decide who I am to them.

Cw

_____________________________

"Free your mind and your ass will follow
the kingdom of heaven is within"
G. Clinton

"Can't you see, it all makes perfect sense
Expressed in Dollars and cents, Pounds shillings and pence"
R. Waters

(in reply to Vanessacherry)
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RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 12:07:23 PM   
celticlord2112


Posts: 5732
Status: offline
quote:

My question is this, how do you know if someone is a "True Master"?
The more detailed you are the better.

You know if someone is a "True Master" if you say you are his "True Slave".

If you cannot say this, then he is not a "True Master"--at least, not to you.

No other detail is relevant.


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RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 12:19:39 PM   
SirMIkeSD


Posts: 613
Joined: 3/16/2007
From: San Diego, Ca
Status: offline 		They have to also have one of those little badges that you pick up at the local leather shop that says Master on it.

Mike

(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 12:23:21 PM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SirMIkeSD

They have to also have one of those little badges that you pick up at the local leather shop that says Master on it.

Mike



ooh ooh ooh I got one of those!

Oh...wait a minute...dammit...

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There's nowt so queer as folk


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RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 12:29:47 PM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline 		You aren't a Master until you have Mastered your self, of course a big tricked out name plate that states"Master BOUNTY help to make it very clear...We must learn to master many things in our lives, a slave is just one of the many..bounty

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US going to hell in a hand basket/

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RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 12:37:38 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

My question is this, how do you know if someone is a "True Master"? 

You don't. There is no set definition that applies to each and every person. A Master/Mistress can only  be 'true' in YOUR own eyes; not in the eyes of the general populace.

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If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


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Profile   Post #: 7
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 6:35:24 PM   
NihilusZero


Posts: 4036
Joined: 9/10/2008
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		"People have no grasp of what they do." ~Thulsa Doom, Conan The Barbarian

Too many folks start looking for some ideal before they even figure out what their prerequisites are.
Know yourself first.


_____________________________

"I know it's all a game
I know they're all insane
I know it's all in vain
I know that I'm to blame."
~Siouxsie & the Banshees

NihilusZero.com

CM Sex God du Jour
CM Hall Monitor

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Profile   Post #: 8
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 6:56:10 PM   
Usako


Posts: 697
Joined: 7/29/2006
From: NYC
Status: offline 		Everyone knows True Masters graduated from BDSM University.

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Profile   Post #: 9
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 7:24:07 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		A true master for me is not one for you. Instead of trying to tell if someone else is true, why not work on your own issues. Figure out what you need to be in an effective relationship, what you need and what your deal breakers are, and then learn better communication skills so as to effectively convey your needs and be able to listen to the other person. Figure out why you pick people you aren't compatible with and how to better screen for a more compatible partner.

Of course this method requires personal accountability which is not nearly so easy as blaming other people for not being mind readers and denigrating them as not being true.

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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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Profile   Post #: 10
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 8:36:43 PM   
Hekatonkheires


Posts: 18
Joined: 9/18/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Vanessacherry

I was recently reading a thread that had the following response to a poor sub with a broken heart due to being mistreated by her "Master".  This reply got me thinking and I decided to start this new topic for us new "Subs" starting out in our relationships with our new Masters, or those looking for a Master.

Here is the reply
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Some very good "words  of wisdom" for you here. Don't take anyone who calls Himself a "Dominant" or "Master"as such until He has shown you that He IS indeed such a One! Don't give up on yourself, your needs are just that,  you will find the One you seek, tho, it is said,"you have to kiss a lot of frogs, before you find your Prince"!
   I would suggest you alter your current Collarme profile to reflect your new status; free and looking, and take more time this time around. The Lifestyle can be a most rewarding one, when you find the right "One". I wish you well in your search!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------

My question is this, how do you know if someone is a "True Master"? 
The more detailed you are the better.

Thank you in advance,

Vanessa Cherry


You've received a few replies so far, Vanessa, and all share a common theme. I doubt any future answers of value will stray from the theme, either.

The Master true for you will be as you define Him (or Her). If you don't understand what you need or want, then begin with what you know you respond to. Your search can focus on those qualities or traits. Structure? Discipline? Control? A badge?

If you're particular, your search will take longer. If you're flexible, you can find One rather quickly. Of course, there's that little part of reality matching (or not matching) cyberpsyche, but that's a different thread.


(in reply to Vanessacherry)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 8:52:21 PM   
MasterDom72


Posts: 1
Joined: 9/25/2008
Status: offline 		In deference to those who have posted before Me I must say the slave does not define the Master.  A Master is defined by the distinctive fire that arises in His heart.  It is this fire that enflames the slave and enslaves her heart.

(in reply to Hekatonkheires)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 9:58:23 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		After they've been told they are a fake at least five times, then they become real.

And blech to the "enflames and enslaves her heart" idea- no thank you.  I'm glad none of my ex owners desired that.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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Profile   Post #: 13
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/20/2008 10:12:33 PM   
DavanKael


Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

"People have no grasp of what they do." ~Thulsa Doom, Conan The Barbarian

Too many folks start looking for some ideal before they even figure out what their prerequisites are.
Know yourself first.



Hi, NZ----
Okay, I love the Conan reference!  :> 
And, I completely agree with your assertion about self-knowledge.  Important too, is the idea of looking for an 'ideal'.  I think it's normal to have a list on your head about things that you require, things that you would like, things that you would prefer to avoid, things that are unacceptable, etc. but sitting down, eye-to-eye, face-to-face with a person and having a genuine discussion is far more important that any idealized image a person may have; considering what needs you can meet for that person and they can meet for you compared with those points upon which you don't mesh (And seeing if you are inclined and/or able to work with them) is wholly more important to a mind's eye conception of perfection. 
  Davan

_____________________________

May you live as long as you wish & love as long as you live
-Robert A Heinlein

It's about the person & the bond,not the bondage
-Me

Waiting is

170NZ (Aka:Sex God Du Jour) pts

Jesus,I've ALWAYS been a deviant
-Leadership527,Jeff

(in reply to NihilusZero)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/21/2008 4:32:09 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Vanessacherry


My question is this, how do you know if someone is a "True Master"? 
The more detailed you are the better.

Thank you in advance,

Vanessa Cherry


Yes Vanessa, I am a Master, just not your Master!

Thus I am a genuine Master but were I your Master, I would be your True Master and you would be My true slave.. Q.E.D. 


_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to Vanessacherry)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/21/2008 4:45:27 AM   
HeavansKeeper


Posts: 1254
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline 		My favorite phrase, of all the words I've been introduced to, is "operational definition." It means any term can be defined in any way, so long as we all agree on it. The idea is to make clear rules for vague terms.

For a roast to be "cooked" is must "have an internal temperature of, at least, 140ºF"
For a car to be "fast" it must be "traveling above 53 mph"
For someone to be "experienced" they must "be able to provide any amount of insight that would spare a complete novice some amount of confusion, pain, or dissatisfaction"
For a man to be a "true dominant" he must have "................."

Cooked, Fast, Experienced, True Dominance... They're all vague, and the definition can always change.

And you get to fill in the dots. Personally, I prefer the sliding scale, rather than a binary figure.

It's not like one day he gets his 10,000th flog in, now he's the real deal. People grow from amateur to professional over time. Experience isn't everything, some people never learn. Time isn't everything, some people let it waste away. Every person is different, which means every dominant is different. The real question is "What is good enough for me to invest my time in?"

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The Loving Owner of HisHeavan

... You've waited your whole life for this moment...

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Profile   Post #: 16
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/21/2008 5:02:31 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

Vanessacherry
Vanilla



Posts: 10
Joined: 12/13/2008
Status: online I was recently reading a thread that had the following response to a poor sub with a broken heart due to being mistreated by her "Master". This reply got
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterDom72

In deference to those who have posted before Me I must say the slave does not define the Master.  A Master is defined by the distinctive fire that arises in His heart.  It is this fire that enflames the slave and enslaves her heart.


I disagree with this on two grounds:

1. It is not visible to anyone except the so-called Master (and somehow, his slave).
2. It requires nobody to acknowledge it except the Master.

There are just too many bozos running around calling themselves Master.  We don't need to allow more.

My own nebulous definition is that a Master has mastered himself, and others treat him with deference.  He is granted the title by others, not by himself.

Disclaimer - I am a Dom, but have never been called a Master by others.  Nor do I feel that I have earned it - I'm just a normal Dom.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to MasterDom72)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/21/2008 5:27:38 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		They have a Mastercard silly!
That's how you tell.
My God, what's the world coming too...

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Profile   Post #: 18
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/21/2008 5:38:14 AM   
tennesseesatyr


Posts: 2
Joined: 11/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BOUNTYHUNTER

You aren't a Master until you have Mastered your self, of course a big tricked out name plate that states"Master BOUNTY help to make it very clear...We must learn to master many things in our lives, a slave is just one of the many..bounty


This is exactly the point I was going to make.  If you don't have control of your own life, emotions, relationships, household, career, etc., then you can't pretend to have the capacity to be anyone's "Master".

(in reply to BOUNTYHUNTER)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/21/2008 6:48:06 AM   
sujuguete


Posts: 263
Joined: 7/3/2008
From: DC metro area
Status: offline 		"Master" is just a title, like "Doctor" or "Reverend" or "General."  Forget the title, and find someone who inspires your trust, confidence and devotion.

_____________________________

"The true man wants two things: danger and play. For this reason he wants woman, as the most dangerous plaything." ~ Friedrich Nietzsche

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Profile   Post #: 20
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