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RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/21/2008 8:21:59 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		I tend to raise an eyebrow when I read the terms “True” and “Real”. Both terms are subjective and depend on the user’s definition of each one, something which many are unable to define. For this reason, I usually either question the user of such terms, or read more to try to get a sense of what they are really referring to. When referring to the term “Master” one could imagine if we in a Kink discussion or the article is referring to kink, we may vaguely imagine the user means a slave Master (owner and/or trainer of slaves). Even if the discussion is about Got and the Gorean Lifestyle, we would be talking about a Gorean Freeman (Dominant Male) who owns a slave/s. However because in many cases the kink life is interspersed with the mundane life, the term “Master” also refers to:
  • Head of a House or Home (Master of Bruin Cottage for example.
  • A Master Craftsman.
  • A Master of a Vessel. A Teacher.
  • An Academic Qualification (Master of Arts for example).
  Again because of the diversity of kink members it is of course possible to have one or more of these definitions referring to the same person. Now being a fairly literal bloke most of the time, I usually want to know in what sense the term of “Master” is being applied.

Yeah I'm a pain in the arse I know.....

< Message edited by IronBear -- 12/21/2008 8:22:27 AM >

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Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to sujuguete)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/21/2008 10:07:09 AM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Vanessacherry

My question is this, how do you know if someone is a "True Master"? 
The more detailed you are the better.

Setting aside arguments about titles and who deserves them and when... let's substitute the word "master" for "dominant".  So now our question is, how do you know if someone is dominant?  The answer to that is simple... do they have the ability and inclination to impose their will over yours.  If they do, the answer to your question is a simple yes... otherwise its a simple no.

Beyond that, your question becomes highly subjective.  What I mean is... you could determine a person is dominant... but are they a "good dominant" or a "bad dominant" or a "sadistic dominant" or a "creative dominant" or about any other adjective or combination of adjective you can think of.  The problem with all of these is there is no universal definition... its all subjective.  What you might consider a "good sadistic dominant" might to someone else be an "average, mild dominant".  Same dominant, different perspectives... those persepectives being very individualized.

Which is why you'll likely never see a concensus on the whole topic... there is no one answer.

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Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to Vanessacherry)
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RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/21/2008 6:02:25 PM   
MarcEsadrian


Posts: 852
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

"People have no grasp of what they do." ~Thulsa Doom, Conan The Barbarian

Too many folks start looking for some ideal before they even figure out what their prerequisites are.
Know yourself first.



Did someone just quote Thulsa Doom? My life is now complete.

(in reply to NihilusZero)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/21/2008 7:49:45 PM   
TheVoiceofOne


Posts: 58
Joined: 11/5/2008
Status: offline 		I used to be sirmasterdaddy... So, I had all my bases covered.

(in reply to Vanessacherry)
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RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/22/2008 7:09:05 PM   
masterforRT


Posts: 176
Joined: 5/16/2008
Status: offline 		ORIGINAL:  SirMIkeSD   
 
They have to also have one of those little badges that you pick up at the local leather shop that says Master on it.



You mean like that large tricked out name tag in the Progressive Auto Insurance commercials? :)

< Message edited by masterforRT -- 12/22/2008 7:12:52 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 25
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/23/2008 7:30:25 PM   
Wolfie648


Posts: 600
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:


My question is this, how do you know if someone is a "True Master"? 
The more detailed you are the better.

Thank you in advance,

Vanessa Cherry


mmm you listen to them and it seems like a good idea.

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Possibly.

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RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/23/2008 7:36:20 PM   
SummerWind


Posts: 314
Joined: 7/4/2007
Status: offline 		A sub....

(in reply to Vanessacherry)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/27/2008 4:14:47 PM   
Begsnice


Posts: 9
Joined: 12/31/2005
Status: offline 		Someone who has many years of knowledge and experience and has enslaved a sub or two.



begsnice

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/27/2008 5:49:10 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		~Fast Reply~

My rule of thumb: They reject the term "true" anything and regard themselves as people who are also *insert term here* in addition to everything else that they are.

Edited cause I'm tired and worded it better in my head after clicking "Ok".

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 12/27/2008 5:50:22 PM >

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Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

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Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to sujuguete)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/27/2008 5:51:42 PM   
porcelain26


Posts: 181
Joined: 11/16/2007
Status: offline 		A Master, to me, is the man who owns me.

Sir, is a name I use when referencing men I respect, whether that be my biological father, a doctor I'm calling at 2:46am, or a dominant play partner who is currently turning my tits a love shade of black and blue.

A dominant, is any man or woman whom I feel, at least somewhat, submissive towards.

My definitions, like almost anyone's, are altered to suit the particular needs of the one using the term. Who a Master is to me, is not the same as it would be to someone else. The same with who a dominant is. No one explanation or definition will fit the bill for everyone. Part of what I love about BDSM is it's ability to be a hundred different things to a hundred different people, and be exactly right for all of them.

(in reply to Begsnice)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/28/2008 1:53:56 AM   
JustDarkness


Posts: 1461
Joined: 7/25/2008
Status: offline
quote:

you know if someone is a "True Master"? 

It is not some one playing a role,.... but a person you trust and believe in. A person you are willing to follow....and no one else..but you have to feel that.

(in reply to porcelain26)
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RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/28/2008 3:17:40 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		The only person who can define what a true Master is to you is YOU. Some feel that there are a set of traits that a Master must have in order to be "real" or "true" and just as soon as they state them with any finality, someone else will come along and counter them. Go with your own gut.

Master Fire


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(in reply to Vanessacherry)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/28/2008 6:41:04 AM   
bosch


Posts: 14
Joined: 5/5/2008
Status: offline 		'Cause they have a diploma suitable for framing that verifies that they graduated from BDSM U.......

No, really. Remember that you're dealing with "relationships", and everything that has to do with relationships is entirely subjective. Think about it like this: if you're a woman and you're looking for a monogamous heterosexual marriage, then every male becomes a viable candidate to fit that role. That does NOT mean that you could marry any male and be equally happy. The one that would make you happy in that framework is the one that meets your emotional criteria  - even though technically they all have the same gear.

Same thing applies in this arena - just because I've got my shit together, am gainfully employed and good with a signal whip doesn't make me your true 'Master'. The one you call 'Master' is the one who meets your subjective, emotional criteria and makes you feel like a slave.



(in reply to Vanessacherry)
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RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/28/2008 9:55:00 PM   
femmetasia


Posts: 40
Joined: 11/18/2008
Status: offline 		lol @ Kana re: Mastercard. 

The only "true" response to your question can only be obtained from listening to your own heart.  My Master is my "true" Master but not yours....vice a versa.  Zip off into fantasy land awhile and ask yourself what it is you desire in a master...does he fit the bill?  Is there enough foundation for growth (for you both)?  Good luck with your journey and blessed be.

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RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/28/2008 11:08:57 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		Yes he is a Master and He is your Master!
Yes you are a slave just not My slave!.

That I think places it nicely in perspective. 

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to femmetasia)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/29/2008 1:41:13 AM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		Well, I've given my definition of "master" a few times, and nobody seems to like it ... but that hasn't changed my mind.  So here goes:

A master is someone who owns a slave.  No more and no less.

(in reply to sujuguete)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/29/2008 1:45:13 AM   
JustDarkness


Posts: 1461
Joined: 7/25/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

Well, I've given my definition of "master" a few times, and nobody seems to like it ... but that hasn't changed my mind.  So here goes:

A master is someone who owns a slave.  No more and no less.



it is not that bad :P

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/29/2008 4:26:11 AM   
Aneirin


Posts: 6121
Joined: 3/18/2006
From: Tamaris
Status: offline 		When I was an UM, I was a master then, well, that is what it said on any mail sent to me in the post, (snail mail, pre internet days). It was the order of the day, when one was to address an UM, it was written as Master, (insert name).

But as far as the kinky community goes, anyone who introduces themselves to me as Master this, that or the other, immediately gets the mindful rolls of the eyes, Lord this, or lady that, even worse, and I have come across a few.

In the past, if it were when I was doing the battle re enactment, someone calling themself Lord that to me was even more reason to beat the crap out of them on the field, as often it was those that did call themselves such, were often the ones with the most money and could afford nice shiny armour to dent and pretty swords to notch.

But as with others here, a master, is only that to their slave(s), those that have consensually agreed to call a person a master, anyone else, get a life.

(To note, I have zero respect for titles other than Mr or Mrs )


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Everything we are is the result of what we have thought, the mind is everything, what we think, we become - Guatama Buddha

Conservatism is distrust of people tempered by fear - William Gladstone

(in reply to JustDarkness)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/29/2008 6:41:15 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

Well, I've given my definition of "master" a few times, and nobody seems to like it ... but that hasn't changed my mind.  So here goes:

A master is someone who owns a slave.  No more and no less.


That LaM, certainly covers the core of it and is indeed very Gorean or at least is in agreement with the Gorean perspective as you know. (A Gorean Freeman is only considered to be a Master whilst he owns slaves), however, I also submit as I have said many times, the head of a house may also be considered either a Master or Mistress although in Gorean terms and if he headed a city he would either be an Administrator (in Peace) or Ubar (in War) but we are all earth folk here (I think) and whilst a percentage of Masters don't live the BDSM or similar lifestyle as a lifestyle 24/7 (such as the Gorean or Victorian or in fact the 1950s Households 24/7) some do so and as such any title they’re entitled to use in their daily live is also applicable within the BFDSM community if they so desire and thus someone who is a member of the clergy in real life is entitled if they choose to be addressed by his professional title as is a physician (Dr) Teacher (Master or a professional person who is a Master of an academic discipline such as Master of Music, Law, or even Psychology can especially if their mundane profession is part of their BDSM activities can be reasonably referred to as Master.  However, I am splitting hairs I know but it does irk me when people who do not own slaves but are entitled to be referred or addressed as Master (Owner of a home or similar establishment particularly when within their Lifestyle (such as the Victorian era Lifestyle) would be addressed as master of whatever...  I do know folk here who if they wished could also use their rightful titles as a legitimate part of their name such as Sir for a Knight and Lord for (eg) Titled personage who is normally addressed as Lord soandso.. 

Just my thoughts with as usual my respect for others' ideas and views.


_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: What makes a Master a Master - 12/29/2008 2:47:22 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		-=ON BEING A MASTER=- 
To me, the old school definition of Master is still found in the dictionary. Nouns that apply to the title are, teacher, mentor, expert, leader and the classic “Master of the slaves” in the literal sense. All these titles refer to a person in a seat of responsibility over those he is training or ruling. I enjoy all aspects of the verbal application of Master as well. One must “master” themselves before mastering others. So this old school view applies to my outlook. In order to master a slave, you must be financially able to own and support them. In order to rule your slave, must have mastered yourself first. To train your slave you must be an expert or “Master” in the art or subject. To me, being a Master, means you must master your slave. 
-Kalon Eric 

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I give good thread.

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Profile   Post #: 40
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