RE: Previously... (Full Version)

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Cuffkinks -> RE: Previously... (12/26/2008 4:29:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LumusandtheLady

...on, "As the D-Ring Turns"...
 
Ladyrainfire had married Lumus to cross the border for the FBI and spy on Canada's recent political shifts.  Lumus, not knowing the true motivation behind the marriage, continued his secret torrid affair with beargonewild, who suffered from MPD and whose Dominant personality owned piratecommander.
 
piratecommander, who in fact was a transgendered narcissist that proposed to its female countpart, GreedyTop, in an attempt to thwart the bailout of CollarMe by the evil coalition known only as "The Moderators" [led by Ecksie, a Nigerian who referred to himself as XI], started a slave ring to Cuba through ResidentSadist.  With the illicit funds, piratecommander would hire sirsholly and virginpotty to kidnap Ecksie and halt the bailout of CollarMe, forcing the site to join with the US Air Force to invade Iceland and steal their natural resources.
 
Unaware of piratecommander's true goals, beargonewild funneled monies from prostituting Canadian moose in China to open a Brothel Of Beaver [BOB for short] in Iceland.  Led by the Madame scifi [who cleverly misled online trolls by disguising herself as a male biker], the BOB was expected to generate enough revenue to buy better monikers for the likes of LadyHibiscus, soul2share, dcnovice and SteelofUtah.
 
Will Lumus, the young RCMP officer, find out about the BOB and lock up the beaver?
Will Ladyrainfire be able to decipher the true meaning behind Canada's two-tiered political system?
Will piratecommander marry himself?
Will Ecksie deliver gratuitous modspankings to keep the seedy underbelly of CM secret?
Will the Chinese keep banging moose?
 
For the answers to these and many other questions, tune in next time!
 



"Prostituting Canadian moose in China..."  <----- CLASSIC!
I simply have to be a part of this unfolding saga.
[sm=popcorn.gif]




impishlilhellcat -> RE: Previously... (12/26/2008 5:10:32 PM)

Oh that is just too funny!




beargonewild -> RE: Previously... (12/26/2008 7:46:13 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: hejira92

I'm lovin' it! [:D]
 
As Master and I will be attending the wedding in Orlando (that is, if it's an ACTUAL wedding, and not a beard for some nefarious scheme....), I would LOVE to be included in the unfolding drama.


I shouldn't say this but the wedding is also a front to export sex trade worker moose into the US.




LadyHibiscus -> RE: Previously... (12/26/2008 7:48:07 PM)

Dagnabbit, you weren't supposed to mention that they were SEX worker moose!!  They are DOMESTICS, offering personal services!




beargonewild -> RE: Previously... (12/26/2008 7:54:23 PM)

Well Goddess...that's only part of their services!




LadyHibiscus -> RE: Previously... (12/26/2008 7:58:06 PM)

Well sure, "moose stuff" is VERY comprehensive! [8D]




hejira92 -> RE: Previously... (12/26/2008 8:30:29 PM)

All this talk of mooses reminded me of this comedy routine. If anyone else remembers this (and who did it), you get a gold star- and a walker for being so old!

I shot a moose, once. I was hunting up-state New York, and I shot a moose, and I strap him on to the fender of my car, and I'm driving home along the west side highway, but what I didn't realize was, that the bullet did not penetrate the moose. It just creased the scalp, knocking him unconscious. And I'm driving through the Holland tunnel - and the moose wakes up. So I'm driving with a live moose on my fender. The moose is signaling for a turn. Y'know, there's a law in New York state against driving with a conscious moose on your fender, tuesday, thursday and saturday. And I'm very panicky, and then it hits me: some friends of mine are having a costume party. I'll go, I'll take the moose, I'll ditch him at the party. It wouldn't be my responsibillity.
So I drive up to the party and I knock on the door. The moose is next to me. My host comes to the door. I say "Hello. You know the Solomons". We enter. The moose mingles. Did very well. Scored. Two guys were trying to sell him insurance for an hour and a half. Twelve o'clock comes - they give out prices for the best costume of the night. First price goes to the Berkowitzes, a married couple dressed as a moose. The moose comes in second. The moose is furious. He and the Berkowitzes lock antlers in the living room. They knock each other unconscious. Now, I figured, is my chance. I grab the moose, strap him onto my fender, and shoot back to the roads, but - I got the Berkowitzes. So I'm driving along with two jewish people on my fender, and there's a law in New York State ... tuesdays, thursdays and especially saturday.
The following morning the Berkowitzes wake up in the woods, in a moose suit. Mr. Berkowitz is shot, stuffed and mounted - at the New York Athletic Club, and the joke is on them, because it's restricted.




soul2share -> RE: Previously... (12/26/2008 9:02:15 PM)

HEY!  I'm with LadyH....I likes my name too!  Altho, I might be interested to see what our Boy Genius comes up with!

And Greedy...your thought is the same one I had when I started reading his thread......it was a reaaaaaaly slow day at work!

But I vote for more!




MarksFantasyGirl -> RE: Previously... (12/26/2008 9:36:56 PM)

I'm always left out of the fun.... :(

(DO love the story though!)




LadyPact -> RE: Previously... (12/26/2008 9:41:04 PM)

I just want to know if we have any confirmed photography of the affair between Lumas and the bear.  Send all pictures, video, and microfilm to:

Present Evidence Resident Voyeur
(Office of PERV)
Attn: Lady Pact




GreedyTop -> RE: Previously... (12/26/2008 10:18:10 PM)

*snort*




piratecommander -> RE: Previously... (12/27/2008 1:16:15 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LumusandtheLady

Lumus, not knowing the true motivation behind the marriage, continued his secret torrid affair with beargonewild, who suffered from MPD and whose Dominant personality owned piratecommander.
piratecommander, who in fact was a transgendered narcissist that proposed to its female countpart, GreedyTop.
With the illicit funds, piratecommander would hire sirsholly and virginpotty to kidnap Ecksie and halt the bailout of CollarMe, forcing the site to join with the US Air Force to invade Iceland and steal their natural resources.

 
Unaware of piratecommander's true goals, beargonewild funneled monies from prostituting Canadian moose in China to open a Brothel Of Beaver [BOB for short] in Iceland.
Will piratecommander marry himself?
 
For the answers to these and many other questions, tune in next time!
 



On tonights episode ........

We discover that , in fact , beargonewild is not such an innocent (contrary to popular beleif) at all and is in fact "the straight man" in the scheme.
Knowing that Bear has clearly got EVERYONE fooled about this , the Pirate continues on his despotic mission to maximise the Moosing revenues of the BOB to finance an entire fleet of "floating" BOB's and thus besiege the island of America , thus forcing it to kneel and beg.
The good ship "Tansgendered Narcissist" is suspected to be approaching seaworthiness and it's crew are ready to eat raw genitalia (even the Chinese .... known for their love of waving red flags .... are heard to be extending their Great Wall along their shores)
Bear will secure the complicity of Taiwan (by dressing up in a Panda suit and winning hearts and minds)

The only safe haven will be Orlando on the day where "The Gathering" is to take place (suspected to involve plenty of raw genitalia conoisseurs)

Pirate




KMsAngel -> RE: Previously... (12/27/2008 1:24:04 AM)

well at least australia will be safe. i'm sure the major networks will have coverage of the "gathering" and we can all follow the cliffhanger - who will be groped by a third party first, pirate or greedy?




piratecommander -> RE: Previously... (12/27/2008 1:45:30 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: KMsAngel

well at least australia will be safe. i'm sure the major networks will have coverage of the "gathering" and we can all follow the cliffhanger - who will be groped by a third party first, pirate or greedy?


? I have to go to THREE parties before I get groped ?

Whats wrong with these people ?

Pirate




persephonee -> RE: Previously... (12/27/2008 1:50:38 AM)

id grope you Pirate, really i would, but Greedy is just a bit too switchy to risk it. id hate to be GT'd...that would just be awful...blinkblink...




cravesdom -> RE: Previously... (12/27/2008 2:15:49 AM)

Absolutely hilarious! Would love to read more and be a part of the story as well.




piratecommander -> RE: Previously... (12/27/2008 2:18:04 AM)

Awful ... you say ?

Pirate




persephonee -> RE: Previously... (12/27/2008 2:22:58 AM)

erm...nooooo...dats not how dat was s'posed to come out....

please tell me shes asleep....




persephonee -> RE: Previously... (12/27/2008 2:24:00 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: cravesdom

Absolutely hilarious! Would love to read more and be a part of the story as well.


Lookit you two....how fkn cute ARE you anyways????




cravesdom -> RE: Previously... (12/27/2008 2:28:11 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: persephonee

quote:

ORIGINAL: cravesdom

Absolutely hilarious! Would love to read more and be a part of the story as well.


Lookit you two....how fkn cute ARE you anyways????


Awwwwww...thank you! I think so, but I am just a little bit biased!




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