RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for personal reasons

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RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 12/31/2008 7:17:25 AM

oceanwynds

Posts: 1044
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline

this has totally confused my head. I don't wear signs that i am this or that, but then i dont have the need to do so. People who don't know me will never know the necklace i wear is a dedication to my Goddess, since i am a witch. People who see Sir and me on the street will assume we just are a couple. When i take a clients call they might think I am this or that, because a lot of concepts are put on psychics but I don't advertise i am a witch or submissive. My life is express through my actions not my attire. Where i go to meet people or visit is not dependent on me looking a certain way. I am old though, and remember when i was young and wanted to fit in to being a hippie, so i dressed the part. When i was protesting I dressed the part. I have nothing now to dress the part, i am just me. Signs on me don't exist anymore. I am not own or micromanaged and Sir expects me, as i expect myself to give all i am to life. I am not really vanilla or Ds i just me that holds both within. My relationship is based on reality of a relationship that works for us, not what people think we should be or be doing by their design.

i hope you find what you seek
oceanwynds

(in reply to lobodomslavery)

Post #: 21

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 12/31/2008 11:09:12 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Would you be ok for a servant to leave you for personal reasons like real life career reasons or would you feel betrayed
kevin

Of course I've feel betrayed and disappointed but that's life. If what we have isn't more important than a career move then it wasn't worth keeping around frankly and our dynamic probably did all it could for at least one of us. I see no reason to stay in a consensual, not legally backed, dynamic if you are no longer getting what you need from it.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to lobodomslavery)

Post #: 22

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/1/2009 2:27:08 AM

BondageBarbieX

Posts: 495
Joined: 4/1/2008
Status: offline

It would depend on the circumstances and if you are collared or not.

(in reply to lobodomslavery)

Post #: 23

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/1/2009 3:48:22 AM

Feliciasub

Posts: 75
Joined: 11/26/2008
Status: offline

This is so confusing

i have a full time job and when i am at work... i work....if someone wants to keep in touch with me, He/She text me and i answer when i have time ( on breaks and lunch time ) nobody knows that at home i am a submissive girl.

With this said, i can't answer about your Domme's feelings... i am not a Domme and i am not Her. The only way to know is to talk about all this with Her..... Communication, Communication, Communication is always the key

(in reply to BondageBarbieX)

Post #: 24

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/1/2009 4:39:53 AM

thishereboi

Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline

What does your Mistress think about the idea?

_____________________________

"Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" .. Albert

This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi

(in reply to lobodomslavery)

Post #: 25

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/1/2009 6:06:21 AM

Lynnxz

Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline

Lobo... I thought you didn't have a mistress?

Or is this going to be another one of those threads where you make up your sob story as we go along?

_____________________________

HBIC

(in reply to thishereboi)

Post #: 26

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/1/2009 7:46:36 AM

lobodomslavery

Posts: 2477
Joined: 1/17/2008
Status: offline

i do i serve her remotely
kevin

(in reply to Lynnxz)

Post #: 27

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/1/2009 7:48:35 AM

kdmfl

Posts: 118
Joined: 12/3/2008
Status: offline

relationships end all the time for a wide variety of reasons. Its always difficult when they are over but life keeps moving forward and change is inevitable

(in reply to ALAstella)

Post #: 28

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/1/2009 7:50:26 AM

lobodomslavery

Posts: 2477
Joined: 1/17/2008
Status: offline

i emailed her yesterday about my predicament , my hope is i can leave Her for whatever time is necessary to get myself sorted and that She will still accept me back when i get sorted ie leave Her when i get a job and then when im made permanent hopefully in no more than 2 years from the time i get the job whenever that will be i dont know, She will reaccept me
kevin

(in reply to Lynnxz)

Post #: 29

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/1/2009 8:12:23 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

i emailed her yesterday about my predicament , my hope is i can leave Her for whatever time is necessary to get myself sorted and that She will still accept me back when i get sorted ie leave Her when i get a job and then when im made permanent hopefully in no more than 2 years from the time i get the job whenever that will be i dont know, She will reaccept me
kevin

Two points.

First, if this is a remote relationship any way, I'm unclear about why you can't maintain contact with her in the same or similar fashion. Unless you are enrolling in the French Foreign Legion or going out in the middle of freaking nowhere why wouldn't you have access to phone or email?

Yes, your changes might require less time but that's something you all negotiate.

Second, two years is a very long time for someone you know "remotely". If you were married, or had been dating in meatlife for years and years, I'd say she might wait but I would not hold my breath if I were you given the "remoteness" of the relationship.

I strongly suggest that if your relationship has value you renegotiate contact and work on maintaining it.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to lobodomslavery)

Post #: 30

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/1/2009 8:24:34 AM

MistressDolly

Posts: 917
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Would you be ok for a servant to leave you for personal reasons like real life career reasons or would you feel betrayed
kevin

Ok? Of course. Betrayed? Absolutely not - - people have to do what is best for themselves first and foremost.

_____________________________

m i s t r e s s d o l l y . c o m

m y s p a c e

(in reply to lobodomslavery)

Post #: 31

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/1/2009 8:34:35 AM

MarcEsadrian

Posts: 852
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Would you be ok for a servant to leave you for personal reasons like real life career reasons or would you feel betrayed

Hi Kevin,

I suppose that would depend entirely upon the circumstances, and the depth of commitment in servitude. Your career example, for me, wouldn't constitute a reason for ending the nature of the relationship. A wise Master or Mistress would probably find material opportunity in such a case.

That said, there are plenty of individuals who would give up their careers, possessions, social connections and other vital things in their lives to be wholly kept. For many, to be so consumed is an evasive ideal, not something that's a deal breaker. The real personal reason for leaving, however, most likely resides in the fact things are just not working, for if they are, I see few circumstances where a devoted, loving servant would need to suddenly uproot and leave, unless of course the Master or Mistress wishes it.

(in reply to lobodomslavery)

Post #: 32

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/1/2009 10:09:00 AM

lobodomslavery

Posts: 2477
Joined: 1/17/2008
Status: offline

its difficult She lives in Atlanta i in Dublin. She recently turned pro. i tribute her weekly what i can
kevin

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 33

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/1/2009 10:15:30 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

If setting you free means she loses her tribute, I'm sure she'll do everything she can to keep you.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to lobodomslavery)

Post #: 34

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/1/2009 10:52:34 AM

lateralist1

Posts: 886
Joined: 11/22/2006
Status: offline

So your on benefits. Can't find a job and your sending tributes to a woman in Atlanta that you have never met.
You owe nothing to this woman.
You need someone who cares about you in your life.
Someone who will help you realise your worth as a human being.
Findng a job is difficult for everyone. You need any spare cash you have to help you find one and to spend on going out to find real friends in your neighbourhood.
The internet helps very few people to find the right relationships.
Now go and get involved with some voluntary work in your neighbourhood.
And forget BDSM.
If you absolutely need someone to talk to then mail me and I'll give you my email address.
And stop being a stupid boy.

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 35

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/2/2009 3:06:30 AM

lobodomslavery

Posts: 2477
Joined: 1/17/2008
Status: offline

Yes Ma'am i think Your right and its good to know that there are Dommes out there who actually consider the sub and not his wallet. i have sent an email regarding my situation to my Mistress. She still thinks i can serve her and tribute her. Yes you are right. The fact that my Mistress cannot see that i need all my energies to sort out my life including financial ones is a bad sign. And its a good enough sign for me to leave her at least temporarily until things are sorted out
kevin

(in reply to lateralist1)

Post #: 36

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/2/2009 3:10:23 AM

FullfigRIMAAM1

Posts: 1160
Joined: 11/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus
My private life is private. My employers know nothing of it---nor will they.

Same here.
As to the answer of whether you ought to leave, it only depends on the two of you. For myself, I would never want someone staying if he were ambivalent or unhappy staying.

quote:

its difficult She lives in Atlanta i in Dublin. She recently turned pro. i tribute her weekly what i can
kevin

Wow, color me surprised, and incredulous.

M

< Message edited by FullfigRIMAAM1 -- 1/2/2009 3:15:03 AM >

_____________________________

The place to improve the world is first in one's own heart and head and hands.-Robert M. Persig

Love is the only sane and satisfactory answer to the problem of human existence Erich Fromm

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Post #: 37

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/2/2009 6:49:51 AM

LATEXBABY64

Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline

um well what are you doing in the lifestyle for one and two when you get down playing at it or trying out i think you should stick to nilla cause when you enter into a relationship it should mean more then just tasting the coffee yep

(in reply to FullfigRIMAAM1)

Post #: 38

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/2/2009 7:05:43 AM

thishereboi

Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Yes Ma'am i think Your right and its good to know that there are Dommes out there who actually consider the sub and not his wallet. i have sent an email regarding my situation to my Mistress. She still thinks i can serve her and tribute her. Yes you are right. The fact that my Mistress cannot see that i need all my energies to sort out my life including financial ones is a bad sign. And its a good enough sign for me to leave her at least temporarily until things are sorted out
kevin

So she thinks you can still serve her and pay tribute. That doesn't surprise me at all. Who in their right mind would give up a cash cow like that.

So tell me kevin, what exactly are you getting out of this relationship? Do you feel that you are getting your moneys worth from her?

I realize I said earlier that you should ask her what she thinks about your job, but I have changed my mind on that. Do what you feel is best for you and don't worry about her. I am sure she will find someone else to send her some cash. In fact she probibly has others already. Good luck.

_____________________________

"Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" .. Albert

This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi

(in reply to lobodomslavery)

Post #: 39

RE: Is it ok for a servant to leave his Mistress for pe... - 1/2/2009 7:21:51 AM

wandersalone

Posts: 4666
Joined: 11/21/2005
Status: offline

I would actually be way more concerned that you couldn't see that you need all of your energies to sort out your life.

Hopefully this time out will be a chance for you to review your life, develop some achievable small goals and focus on gaining some stability and security in your life.

I wish you all the best.

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Yes Ma'am i think Your right and its good to know that there are Dommes out there who actually consider the sub and not his wallet. i have sent an email regarding my situation to my Mistress. She still thinks i can serve her and tribute her. Yes you are right. The fact that my Mistress cannot see that i need all my energies to sort out my life including financial ones is a bad sign. And its a good enough sign for me to leave her at least temporarily until things are sorted out
kevin

_____________________________

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. Martin Luther King
Godmother of the subbie mafia
My all time favourite threads
http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=2002501
http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=790885

(in reply to lobodomslavery)

Post #: 40

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