Aszhrae
Posts: 1030
Joined: 3/31/2008
Status: offline
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If I am asked, I reveal the truth of my physiology. It is there option if they choose to remain in their ignorance but at least I took the initiative to inform them. Some react negatively and some in the past have reacted violently. Others have reacted with indifference and others have actually reacted with acceptance. I find it a blessing when the person that I have revealed my situation to, actually respond with curiosity and want to learn more about me.
Women tend to be more accepting and curious.
Men on the other hand are my greatest source of angst. Unless they are gay, which is a 50/50 split. Either I am received by disgust or I am met with understanding, some react with fascination. Even though it is something they would never consider themselves, providing insight into my transformation actually makes me feel good about my choice.
A system that would have me openly lie to others and have me compromise my own morality I find questionable.
I do love how sometimes when I was given my own time I have been the recipient of many comments, such as the following:
negative remarks
giggling by girls much younger than my self
remarks upon how I am attired, recently a remark from a passing truck, where a woman rolled down her window to shout the comment: Puss in Boots.
another comment I remember in passing I overheard: two guys walk passed me, one asked the other, 'is that a guy or a girl?' the other guy asked,'who?' and then I heard,'her'. You have no idea how good that felt, when an individual's own subconscious answers the question before the mind has a chance to reason.
If they had stopped me to ask, I would have been totally up front. Being in transition is part of my greatest joy when others want to be informed. Greatest angst when they spit out prejudice and condemnation in display of their ignorance.
Do not compromise your morality because a therapist tells you do so. I would be questioning the morality of your therapist and look for another therapist.
I find my self fortunate that I am not having to do my transition under the scrutiny of the Clarke's Institute. Their morality is stuck in the 50s. Here in Vancouver, BC, it has more to do with self-expression, finding your own identity and being comfortable in your own skin. People here are much more liberal in their acceptance as long as you are honest while in transition.
I agree with Faerie.
If your identification says female. Then you are female.
If the male in question asks or wants to have children with you. It might be prudent just to say that you can't. Simply saying that you are barren should be enough.
< Message edited by Aszhrae -- 1/3/2009 1:26:45 PM >
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To my own self, I be true.
Goddess bless and keep you and yours safe
Ricah-Azzh
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RE: Telling a date you're a TG woman - 
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I think that's probably the exception rather than the rule though. Think of it this way.. anyone who is going to have a problem with you being TG, well, you might as well get that out up front and save yourself time because they're probably not going to be compatible with you anyway. It's really to your own benefit to trust yourself and your judgment enough to just go ahead and tell people and let the chips fall where they may. Some of us will just say.. "Yeah.. and?? Do you kick dogs and steal candy from babies or do you have some news which is horrible that would change how I view you as a person? No? Let's go to lunch." 
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