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RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/13/2009 11:19:04 PM

azjojoba

Posts: 513
Joined: 2/1/2007
Status: offline

Awhile back I met a dominant woman who demanded that every time I see her I was to put panties on. Sometimes she would have me go into another room to dress, and I would have to come out with the panties on. I liked the way it felt to be seen in front of a woman this way. Can't explain why but it worked for us.

I think she really liked the fact that I had to go to the store to buy them. It was a humiliating experience.

(in reply to pinnipedster)

Post #: 41

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/14/2009 7:52:16 AM

Reigna

Posts: 334
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline

This is one of the best threads I've read at CM on this topic. Thank you to everyone who contributed; you taught me a lot.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 42

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/14/2009 8:12:12 AM

MistresseLotus

Posts: 443
Joined: 9/19/2008
From: (aka LotusSong)
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Reigna

I'd agree that people into fringe activities can have a chip on their shoulder. And I agree that in a public forum, posters need to have a thick skin and stop whining, already. If you're into something weird and squicky--come on, you gotta know that not everyone likes it, so own up. But I also think it's fair to say that the tone of "not for me" posts sometimes runs to the condemnatory--not always, and not with every poster, but commonly enough so that it is indeed a problem.

But which is better.. to have warm and fuzzy posts of "go for it.. it's all good".. or have the other type of posts when they are shown the other attitude.. or is it better to lead them down the garden path only to be broadsided later on?

I'd rather know both sides of the issue and decide for myself as well as the WHY people feel the way they do.

_____________________________

I leave it to the 20-somethings to do the "open-minded, total unconditional acceptance thing" for it's how THEY learn that all the things others older than they have deemed BS, are in fact BS. What a waste of a decade.

(in reply to Reigna)

Post #: 43

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/16/2009 3:09:59 AM

iwearpanties

Posts: 509
Joined: 7/21/2005
Status: offline

i agree is great seeing both sides of this thread not just haveing it one sided . but getting both sides weather good or bad ?

(in reply to MistresseLotus)

Post #: 44

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/17/2009 9:41:41 AM

pinnipedster

Posts: 217
Joined: 4/17/2008
Status: offline

I've been out of town all week and, out of paranoia, haven't been accessing CollarMe through my work-issued laptop. :) But I wanted to thank people for their thoughtful replies.

Generally I am at a loss to figure out how to pursue women at *all*, let alone women who (a) have a dominant streak and (b) see at least something positive in having a relationship with a cross-dresser. I just don't know where to look. Sites or groups that cater to cross-dressers are usually overwhelmed with single crossdressers seeking women, and almost no unattached women. (I actually was on a mailing list once put together by a woman who was actively seeking a CD to date. I think there were four actual women on the list. One already had a crossdressing mate and was just there to encourage people. One was much too young for me and seeking money slaves besides. The other two liked crossdressers but not "freaks" -- and they were not particularly nice about it; it wasn't a matter of "You're not for me, but good luck," it was more, "You have something seriously wrong with you, ewww." And of course as soon as the founder actually found someone, the mailing list went away. Ah well.) Sites with dominant women usually find the majority not interested in crossdressers. Even when there are a few women interested, there are almost none who are specifically seeking crossdressers, so you're not just competing with the other CDs but with all the other men as well. There are women who are into androgynous or feminine men, but that's not me -- I don't look that way, and when I'm in guy mode I am not particularly feminine, though I am far from "macho." And on top of that, so many dominant women are looking for the succesful, alpha-male type of submissive, which is not me and never will be.

So, yeah, it gets pretty discouraging. It's very easy to just not bother trying when the chances of success seem so low. As for trying to get involved with local groups and such -- I don't make friends very easily, and usually have come away from such gatherings feeling more lonely than ever.

But, well, you can't give up entirely. As I've written recently, 2009 is shaping up well: Obama takes office in January, there's a new Christopher Moore book due out in February, and the Watchmen movie is coming out as scheduled in March. So maybe things will continue getting better. :)

(in reply to iwearpanties)

Post #: 45

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/17/2009 1:01:12 PM

iwearpanties

Posts: 509
Joined: 7/21/2005
Status: offline

i agree ista new rys but just cause there a new shriff in town dosent man thigns change asap

(in reply to pinnipedster)

Post #: 46

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/17/2009 4:37:02 PM

beeble

Posts: 799
Joined: 5/25/2005
From: UK
Status: offline

quote:

iwearpanties wrote:
i agree ista new rys but just cause there a new shriff in town dosent man thigns change asap

In English, please?

beeble.

_____________________________

Kita's owned slutpet.

(in reply to iwearpanties)

Post #: 47

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/17/2009 10:03:52 PM

OneMoreWaste

Posts: 910
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: pinnipedster
there's a new Christopher Moore book due out in February,

That may be the first thing i've ever read on this sub-forum that's given me hope rather than taking it away!

Rock on with your frock on,

Wastie
(in huge manatee)

_____________________________

-and the few still remember passion over rage-

(in reply to pinnipedster)

Post #: 48

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/18/2009 3:56:14 AM

iwearpanties

Posts: 509
Joined: 7/21/2005
Status: offline

beebel sorry i didnt realize i typed bad sorry was ment toobe yes its a new yr and just because we have a new president dosent mean thigns change over nite . notice hes chahged his stance on a few thigns he said hed change while trying too get in office.

(in reply to OneMoreWaste)

Post #: 49

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/18/2009 3:59:38 AM

iwearpanties

Posts: 509
Joined: 7/21/2005
Status: offline

i would like tooask those of us who do or have crossdress have you ever been in fornt of the same sex while dress weather as a humiliation or made to or been exposed to other males as a male sub in fmeals clothes ? or have any of us been dominated by a Master / Dom Male while crossdressed

(in reply to iwearpanties)

Post #: 50

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/18/2009 5:02:56 PM

AlexandraLynch

Posts: 778
Joined: 3/24/2008
Status: offline

Unfortunately you're out of my geographical range for relationships. You sound like a fun and interesting person, though.

_____________________________

I use fastreply. Don't take offence where none is meant.

Just because I'm not a bitch doesn't mean I'm not perfectly capable of making sure you'll be very sorry if you disobey.

(in reply to pinnipedster)

Post #: 51

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/19/2009 12:28:49 AM

azjojoba

Posts: 513
Joined: 2/1/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: pinnipedster

Generally I am at a loss to figure out how to pursue women at *all*, let alone women who (a) have a dominant streak and (b) see at least something positive in having a relationship with a cross-dresser. I just don't know where to look.

That was a very thoughtful post. From what I have observed, even dominant women want macho men, so most of them aren't into crossdressing. My guess is that most of the CD happens with bisexuals and to a smaller extent gays.

(in reply to pinnipedster)

Post #: 52

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/19/2009 3:16:40 AM

iwearpanties

Posts: 509
Joined: 7/21/2005
Status: offline

AZJoJoba i know just what your thiking is on crossdressing . but if you ask or know nay gay males very very few are into crossdressing ...

(in reply to azjojoba)

Post #: 53

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/29/2009 8:55:56 AM

Andalusite

Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline

I know a few gay men who are into cross-dressing. I've even occasionally loaned them clothes and helped them with makeup/etc. I've dated a couple of men who cross-dressed a couple of times during our relationship. I don't find men wearing women's clothes arousing (or women wearing them, for that matter), but that wouldn't bother me on an occasional basis. It could even be fun, but the whole humiliation thing isn't one of my interests. Particularly with regard to cross-dressing, I wouldn't call another woman a "panty girl" or make other such comments, so it's anti-feminisation to do stuff like that to men, IMHO.

(in reply to iwearpanties)

Post #: 54

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/29/2009 9:04:29 AM

chezzy71

Posts: 412
Joined: 4/19/2008
Status: offline

i spoke too soon..i think if Mistress required it of me at times(crossdressing)i would do it without saying the ultimate slap in the face..."but Mistress".as i said in another thread..i don't think it would affect me as a man and more importantly..a submissive man.

(in reply to Andalusite)

Post #: 55

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/29/2009 9:41:10 AM

MistressXahDee

Posts: 43
Joined: 4/29/2008
From: San Diego, Ca.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Erikalocust

Do any lesbians/straight ladies ever train men in feminization?
Not on a professional level, but as a prospective partner?

I wouldn't do it as training per se; but if the guy had some of his own articles of clothing and such, I would help him develop a look I found pleasing. Cross dressing is hot especially when the cd is passable ;)

(in reply to Erikalocust)

Post #: 56

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/29/2009 9:53:48 AM

MistressXahDee

Posts: 43
Joined: 4/29/2008
From: San Diego, Ca.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: iwearpanties

pinnipedster i think you summed it up pretty dam good . you mention what i thionk many of us go thru . as crossdressers or just plain panty wear'ers. i dont think any one could have explained what you wrote any better .im like you and i not sure how others feels or are but i dont pass either and being as tall as i am at close to 6'8 most Domes / Doms shy away thinking and saying Hes to big to be a sub .

Actually, I thought, until this post that cd subs were not rare. Interesting... And a 6'8 sub...sigh..that is so hot.

As far as the passing, and I didn't add this to my prior post, if the CD is even just 'cute' I for one would take a quick look ;) But that is just me and I know I am a bit weird.

(in reply to iwearpanties)

Post #: 57

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/29/2009 9:58:51 AM

OttersSwim

Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressXahDee
Actually, I thought, until this post that cd subs were not rare. Interesting... And a 6'8 sub...sigh..that is so hot.

As far as the passing, and I didn't add this to my prior post, if the CD is even just 'cute' I for one would take a quick look ;) But that is just me and I know I am a bit weird.

You, are gonna get so much mail now...

_____________________________

I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to MistressXahDee)

Post #: 58

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/29/2009 10:02:53 AM

MistressXahDee

Posts: 43
Joined: 4/29/2008
From: San Diego, Ca.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OttersSwim

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressXahDee
Actually, I thought, until this post that cd subs were not rare. Interesting... And a 6'8 sub...sigh..that is so hot.

As far as the passing, and I didn't add this to my prior post, if the CD is even just 'cute' I for one would take a quick look ;) But that is just me and I know I am a bit weird.

You, are gonna get so much mail now...

LOL, not too much I hope...I though I was past 'that' stage in CM.

(in reply to OttersSwim)

Post #: 59

RE: Crossdressing/Feminization - 1/29/2009 10:16:14 AM

welcomerain

Posts: 63
Joined: 5/28/2008
From: Toronto
Status: offline

I've never found it that difficult to find women who enjoyed helping a man cross-dress, or who enjoyed encouraging their partners to have a feminine side. There are obviously plenty of women who don't enjoy this, but I've never thought that it was too big a deal. If someone isn't compatible, she isn't compatible. Shake hands with each other and keep looking.

I have noticed, however, that a lot of women who seem to have "issues" with the whole gender thing are the same women who go for the proverbial "bad boys", planning to change them. I'm not trying to criticize anyone here; this is something I noticed in my own circle of friends. I got the impression that dislike of cross-dressing was highest when a woman had both a starting point and a finishing point in her mind for how she wanted her boyfriend to look. If cross-dressing couldn't be worked into either image, it had to go.

The other thing is that I think cross-dressers sometimes fall into the "do-me" category more than they realize, which is a legitimate turn-off for potential partners. I know a couple of professionals who avoid this fetish because it is both expensive and labour-intensive, and submissives don't always appreciate that it requires extra effort. I personally like it when a woman chooses clothes for me and does my make-up, but it admittedly is time-consuming. Women often take long enough to get ready for a night out, and feminizing a man can take even longer. Again, if a man doesn't appreciate the work that his partner is doing, I'm not surprised if she loses interest quickly, particularly if she wasn't too keen on it to begin with.

I also feel that, cross-dressing aside, there are some serious differences of opinion about how feminization relates to humiliation and punishment. Some women don't want a man who would think of feminization as a bad thing. Others wouldn't want a guy who would consider it a good thing. You have to understand what your partner is looking for if you're discussing getting into this.

(in reply to Erikalocust)

Post #: 60

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