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RE: Fire Within - 1/11/2009 1:25:16 PM   
Godsofold


Posts: 9
Joined: 1/8/2009
Status: offline
quote:

Sex drives between partners often vary. One person might want it daily while the other would be satisfied with once a week. I heard an interesting podcast (from Sex Is Fun) where the suggestion was given that to increase the partner's sex drive try not asking for sex or implying that you want it at all until they start to ask for it. Don't explain it up front, just wait for them to approach you. There were many success stories based on this.


Thank you chamberqueen, your response was more along the lines of the thread question and echoing what LA was saying. Of course, this whole discussion was not meant to be about religion, I was just explaining religion as a point to IronBear for a point.

mc1234 - sound advice, thanks for the thoughts, I'll apply these.

And for those that are still stuck on whether our relationship is BDSM, it's more TIH.

(in reply to chamberqueen)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Fire Within - 1/11/2009 2:24:45 PM   
Musicmystery


Posts: 30259
Joined: 3/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: Musicmystery
BDSM is a complex acronym derived from the terms bondage and discipline (B&D, B/D, or BD), dominance and submission (D&S, D/S, or DS), sadism and masochism (S&M, S/M, or SM).

Your ethics (and nonsloppiness) as a poster would be higher in my eyes if this were not the exact first sentence, verbatim, of the Wikipedia article we were discussing.  As already mentioned, the article has over 100 footnotes, but the sentence that says D/s is included has no source.

I suppose it's not plagiarism if you wrote the article yourself.



If only students and professionals were as fanatic about plagiarism as CM posters.

Repeating a common definition hardly constitutes plagiarism. But since you brought it up, the Wikipedia article sites a web site, a web site with no attribution.

My source is Reference.com. Note the first sentence.

Aside from this is the silliness of debating "what is BDSM" or "well, to me..." statements. This makes the term subjective if not down right arbitrary, and ultimately, who cares? Do your thing and enjoy.

Hope that helps.

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Fire Within - 1/11/2009 3:52:08 PM   
oceanwynds


Posts: 1044
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline 		We all have a fire within but sometimes it appears to be a low pilot light.  Her 'hang-ups' need to slowly be replaced with desire. Desire can be in many areas not just sexual. Work with her on finding her passion and desire again. There are many ways to go about this, from writing erotica, art medias-paint, clay, murals..etc, walking in nature or anything that awaken that flame within.  These ways imo help to reawaken the fire within us.

oceanwynds

(in reply to Musicmystery)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Fire Within - 1/12/2009 6:05:21 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissSepphora1

Ahhh, it makes more sense to say that d/s is not part of bdsm, but it's practiced by those who are into bdsm....

yea....




Actually Lass, you have it arse about. For those in the Gorean and Victorian Lifestyles, D/s, M/s and BDSM are add-ons.  For those who are in D/s and M/s dynamics, BDSM is something they many or may not indulge in. There people who are in no dynamic but still enjoy BDSM as either tops or bottoms as they chose.


_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to MissSepphora1)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Fire Within - 1/12/2009 9:32:20 AM   
MissSepphora1


Posts: 669
Joined: 1/11/2008
Status: offline 		Still no one has asked my totally reasonable question:

Why does collareme.com have no threads named ask a sadist or ask a masochist.

(in reply to IronBear)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Fire Within - 1/12/2009 9:38:35 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		That question Lass would be better addessed to the Moderators such as Mod11 or Mod1

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to MissSepphora1)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Fire Within - 1/12/2009 9:22:26 PM   
blacksilk


Posts: 7
Joined: 1/1/2009
Status: offline 		To the OP,
Being blessed (or cursed) with a naturally high...okay, real high...sex drive - to the point of being called a nympho (and he didn't mean it in a nice way either), the pilot light is always on and always ready.  Just hearing Master's voice, seeing him come online, being near him, is enough to ignite the pilot into full flame.  Sometimes it's just that one person that can make all the difference between having a fire within or cold dead ash.  Not everybody is the same with everybody. 

(in reply to IronBear)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Fire Within - 1/13/2009 2:04:01 AM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissSepphora1

If D/s is not in BDSM, then why are we constantly discussing D/s issues on the boards... why are there ask a Mistress, ask a Master, ask a submissive.  I don't see a single ask a sadist or ask a masochist thread on here anywhere.
Does anyone else see this???


People that have D/s relationships might not have any great interest in bdsm activities.

I imagine that the reason that there aren't more categories of *Ask a **** is because it's not required. Most people can discuss pretty much anything regarding sadism and masochism within the categories available. You have to stop somewhere or there'd be *Ask a Bondage Expert, Ask a Nappy Lover, Ask the Ageplay crowd, Ask a Gay Slave and so on and so forth.

agirl

(in reply to MissSepphora1)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Fire Within - 1/13/2009 4:22:54 AM   
unownedredhead


Posts: 498
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		Look at her and smile very slowly while thinking of all the things you want to do to her and have her do to you.  If there is a slave belly there it will burn.

_____________________________

Kneeling trembling at your feet

(in reply to Godsofold)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Fire Within - 1/14/2009 8:43:44 AM   
NecesitesMe


Posts: 38
Joined: 12/15/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Godsofold

Hi all. I'm wondering, specifically, what are some of the ways that you bring out the "fire" or "sexual" drive within your sub/slave?


Ideas...
1.  Is she on the pill?  It's known to reduce a girls sex drive.  Beware of obvious consequences, but hey, nothing hotter than preggo or psych preggo sex. Tell her to flush the pills, give her time to get her hormones going again (maybe 1-2 months) then tie her up and tell her you're gonna impregnate her. 

2.  Think like a chef.  For a great meal, you need to plan ahead, have all the ingredients prepared and of course pre-heat the oven.  Sure even a frozen pizza will cook if you pull it out of the freezer and drop it in the oven and turn it on 425, but if you take the extra 10 minutes to preheat the oven, it is sooo much better.  In short, get her going early.... Start in the morning with some play or some nice/stern comments about what her evening will be like.  Throw in some txt messages or emails during the day to make sure she is thinking about it and so on.  Just becasue she's a slave/sub doesn't mean she isn't a woman. 

3.  Get her mind off her stresses.  Most people can't do stress and sex.  Let her vent one day, then grab her and give her a good spanking letting her know that she shouldn't be worried about such things.  The spanking should bring her mind to focus on the present.  Tell her as punishment she will be doing some cock worship so she can focus on what should be important to her. 

Good luck.

(in reply to Godsofold)
Profile   Post #: 50
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