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RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/8/2006 10:31:19 AM

Shayna

Posts: 205
Joined: 1/16/2005
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Well I don't have kids so I don't think of it as my son or son's girlfriend, etc. I think that how big the age difference is, is a factor. The OP was referring to about a 20 year difference. That's big in terms of life experience and what the priorities are in someone's life. Now 10 - 15 years might be different. Then it becomes an issue of maturation and life goals. My friends are mostly 10-15 years younger than me, so that's who I socialize with, and I tend to meet men younger than myself. Actually, I've never dated a guy older...so maybe I'm ageist too.

(in reply to Sensualips)

Post #: 21

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/8/2006 10:37:19 AM

MrDiscipline44

Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

Well, MrD, when you can become a mother and raise a couple of sons to manhood, you can tell me how myopic we are. Wanna borrow my spectacles? Yours are a bit dark....

chymes

This statement just proves my point about being myopic. Being able to bear or raise children has nothing to do with the subject at hand. Just because one can't see past the maturity level of ones own children doesn't mean there are not people, who are their childrens age, out there that are more mature then their children.

Now this shows what I'm talking about:

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sensualips

It just depends on the man.

I don't think about it int erms of the age of a son or as a father. That is a completely different aspect of my life and not relevant.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to windchymes)

Post #: 22

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/8/2006 10:59:03 AM

windchymes

Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline

*yawns and cleans her glasses*

Nope, 20/20

*and moves on*

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)

Post #: 23

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/8/2006 11:16:46 AM

MrDiscipline44

Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline

Maybe I should change the word myopic to blind then. LOL

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to windchymes)

Post #: 24

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/8/2006 11:25:29 AM

MHOO314

Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

mist! he won't ring, he'll kick remember? smirks---

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 25

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/8/2006 11:33:02 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
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quote:

Maybe I should change the word myopic to blind then. LOL

Back the buggy up!!! You came on here and made a rather rude comment about how you could find us 40+ submissives under any rock waiting to be dominated....you have attempted to get us to see and understand the maturity levels younger men are capable of, although admittedly we are at a disadvantage due to our declining eyesight and the probable beginnings of senility.....and then you make a statement like this????? Well gosh....that was mature.

< Message edited by mistoferin -- 1/8/2006 11:35:45 AM >

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)

Post #: 26

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/8/2006 1:51:48 PM

MHOO314

Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

As I was driving around doing errands I really thought about this, not to derail but to bring maybe some new things to light---Experience and Marurity are 2 different things, experience adds to maturity and maturity adds to experience--time being the key factor--but that is IF the person has the prediliction to learn and grow--

My concern with that age difference does not have to do with the skill of a flogger, being able to issue commands, or sex--it has to do with life, life changes and the ability to handle them--I have been petitioned by hundreds of subs and slaves from all over the world im age ranges from 18 to 70, the most popular age range is 19-24, ( though My profile is very clearly jaded to someone late 30's and above)--take out the fact that they do not have the experience IMHO to be a good role model for an unmentionable in My home--I could not get past the visual of a waiter asking Me if I or My son is going to get the check---I however am the older Dominant and would make a joke about "the boy" but reverse it--

Could you handle a comment like " ohh its so nice when sons buy dinner for their Moms!"
or you get carded and she doesn't--or you don't because the bartender assumes you are with your "parent"---that's one aspect, another is aging--women have needs when they age--as the One responsible for the care and nurture, how are you prepared to handle menopause? Osteoporosis? Greying hair? vaginal dryness? Hot flashes? How will you simply handle the normal aging process? You are still young and virile--for a long time?

Most 40 somethings have families, large families, how will you handle that? often being the youngest at a family event---will you forbid her to go?

What will you discuss when she is not gagged? or will she be expected to be seen and not heard? We always jump to the kink side and forget there are real lives out there--will you dump her because she is too old and can no longer kneel for 30 minutes? or she bruises easier because she is on hormone replacement therapy?

I am not saying all 40 somethings have those things, but these are not things one finds in a profile, amd they can not be there today and be there tomorrow. In My search I could have had a stable of "boys", but I wanted a man, a boy, a friend, someone to grow old with, someone that could discuss Gershwin as well as MCR--someone to stand tall on My arm and kneel low at My feet--but that is My presonal preference--there are just so many things to think about beyond the techique of a flogger and the issuing of commands.

Some of you will chuckle at this. but you know it rings a tad true...IMNSHO

< Message edited by MHOO314 -- 1/8/2006 1:54:22 PM >

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor

(in reply to MasterB69)

Post #: 27

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/8/2006 4:15:29 PM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

quote:

I think that being ageist is a good way to get ageism thrown back at you.

Okay, I'll bite here. No disrespect intended tammyjo but I guess I am wondering why setting limits for yourself regarding age of potential partners would be necessarily a bad thing. I was recently at a play party when I was approached by a very young Dominant who expressed a desire to pursue me beyond that of acquaintance. When I asked him how old he was he replied that he would soon be turning 21. Now let me tell you....I was completely flattered that this young man would even be attracted to an old broad such as myself.....BUT.... I know that beyond the level of acquaintances....or even sheer sexual fulfillment....that there is really nothing that I would have in common with a gentleman of his age. I politely declined his offer. Now to me, this is just being honest. We all have things that are deal breakers or turn offs when it comes to potential partners....for me, being younger than my own children is definitely one of them. I am also not attracted to alcoholics or drug addicts....so would I be considered to be anti-alcoholicist or anti-addictest as though it was some sort of character flaw on my part? Like I said....no disrespect....just not sure if I like the ageist label.......

You aren't being ageist, are you? Did you feel like you were being chosen for your age and in return picking on him because of his age? Or were you polite and he polite and you merely have a preference.

That wasn't what I was reading in the OP though. It was a complaint -- no older submissives take me seriously -- so I suggested he might want to look at his own behavior. If he's only looking in a specific age group (depending on how he does that) then he may be sending out signals that he is being ageist and that might piss off potential partners (thus the rejections).

Again we all have preferences but how we talk about them or use them can be hurtful and negative or merely communication of those preferences.

Saying "anyone under/over such an age isn't X" is ageism; saying "I prefer folks my own age, or this age" is a preference.

But I see and read a heck of a lot of ageism in the larger kink community(ies) and I wanted to suggest that the OP needed to think about his approach and his words. He may be sending out signals he doesn't mean to and if he is ageist, then he shouldn't be surprised that others are as well.

Am I making more sense now?

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 28

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/8/2006 4:20:02 PM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JohnWarren

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo
I think that being ageist is a good way to get ageism thrown back at you.

About a year ago, I received a request to deliver a lecture to a group. When I checked out their website, I found they were a TNG group and had an upper age limit of 35. When I pointed this out to the person who had made the request, she responded, "Oh, that's just for members. We often have older lecturers."

My response was "That's a bit like the KKK asking Sammy Davis Jr to sing at a rally."

And I agree.

While I know the man who started the TNG groups and his reasons for them, I do not personally support groups who have these age restrictions. I find age restrictions to 21+ to be just as offensive when age of consent in most states is 16-18 years old and we can draft our young men in the USA at the age of 18 to go fight and die for their country.

I've heard this ageism crap from all sides and it always annoys me to know end. I've learned from almost everyone I've ever talked to, taken a workshop from, or even just met briefly. My world would be a much sadder place if I limited people I'd interact with by age to these degrees.

That being said however does not, in my mind, negate the individual's right to have preferences and personal limits related to age. I don't think limits and preferences need be "isms".

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to JohnWarren)

Post #: 29

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/8/2006 7:17:18 PM

Petruchio

Posts: 1615
Joined: 2/6/2005
Status: offline

quote:

Wanna borrow my spectacles? Yours are a bit dark..

He thought you said speculum.

(in reply to windchymes)

Post #: 30

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/8/2006 7:24:32 PM

Petruchio

Posts: 1615
Joined: 2/6/2005
Status: offline

quote:

Hi, Im a 24 year old master. I have a strong interest in dominating a mature submissive, say in her 40's. But im having no luck in finding one.
Does anyone have any advice on how to meet and/or attract oler women. I have had limited experience but am very creative and adventurous. I think some maturer women would feel quite humiliated if being controlled by someone half there age.

I'd suggest looking for the woman and not the age, and you may find what you really want.

That said, it is possible to dominate someone much older. However, speaking personally, while you may ascend part way to their level of maturity, it's also very likely they aren't as fully mature as their age suggests, either. To rephrase, it'll probably be a 17 year old in a 34 year old body.

I can just hear those jokes building about finding a 34 year old in a 17 year old body!

(in reply to MasterB69)

Post #: 31

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/8/2006 10:44:50 PM

redheadedfire4u

Posts: 104
Joined: 11/11/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

You're all invited to come under my rock....I'd love to show you all what I've done with the place!

chymes

As long as your absolutely sure that is not a big storm up there, I will sneak out and join you ... I can bring marshmellows and cocoa, but is there a hole in your rock to let the camp smoke out ....

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

LOL....ok but I've got dibs on the rocker.....the one closest to the phone.....I want to be sure I don't miss that call when my dream Dom rings!!!!!!!!

oh and no fighting over the phone there are plenty of perfect Doms up there above the rock to dominate us all adequately ... no need to fight over them... we can share and play nicely

quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314
mist! he won't ring, he'll kick remember? smirks---

Hmmm forgot Doms don't always play nicely ... sigh you can keep the phone chymes :-)

warm smiles to all

< Message edited by redheadedfire4u -- 1/8/2006 10:53:19 PM >

_____________________________

Driver1961's girl "wild child" and loving sister to His angel

(in reply to windchymes)

Post #: 32

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/8/2006 10:53:20 PM

ivone57

Posts: 279
Joined: 1/23/2005
Status: offline

well speaking from someone that is 40+8 .... i would find that a 20 something that is just starting out needs more than just limited experience and talking online ....

experience is the key there ....

my question would be -- how can you expect to tie someone up and beat them if you have no clue on what your doing except from reading and pictures ....

but thats my opinion .. i want experience and knowledge in what they plan on doing ...

nobody should just pick up something unless they have felt it themselves...

i do believe a good Dom/Master/Mistress/Domme is one that started out as learning from being a bottom ... they just seem to appreciate what the sub/slave is giving to them with their submission than someone that has never been there done that...

like i said.. its my opinion ..

_____________________________

ivone

Property of WhipHer

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

Post #: 33

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/9/2006 6:33:54 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterB69
Does anyone have any advice on how to meet and/or attract oler women. I have had limited experience but am very creative and adventurous. I think some maturer women would feel quite humiliated if being controlled by someone half there age.

In answer to your specific request- be yourself. The only way to make a relationship work is to be yourself and find someone compatible to you. Obviously, don't date people outside your preferred range.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to MasterB69)

Post #: 34

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/9/2006 6:35:58 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

quote:

Look B, you can kick over any rock and find a 40+ submissive there waiting to be dominanted

Ewww I find that statement extremely callous--

But it's also a very true statement. Except for the typo.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to MHOO314)

Post #: 35

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/9/2006 6:36:20 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

Am I making more sense now?

Yes, and thank you

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 36

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/9/2006 6:51:17 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

quote:

Look B, you can kick over any rock and find a 40+ submissive there waiting to be dominanted

Ewww I find that statement extremely callous--

But it's also a very true statement. Except for the typo.

No it's not and quite frankly I find your agreement with such a statement extremely offensive. Creatures that dwell under rocks are worms and slugs. The statement implies that we are the throw aways or the desperate of the lifestyle world. It implies that we are a dime a dozen and should be grateful should some sympathetic dominant cast their attentions our way. Well that is pure bull shit.

You have stated over and over on these boards how you have felt when people class you, judge or not take you seriously based upon your your age. I would think that you would have the clarity to realize that you just did what you so strongly protest against.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 37

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/9/2006 6:58:35 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin
Creatures that dwell under rocks are worms and slugs. The statement implies that we are the throw aways or the desperate of the lifestyle world. It implies that we are a dime a dozen and should be grateful should some sympathetic dominant cast their attentions our way. Well that is pure bull shit.

Well....subs ARE a dime a dozen.

I think reading into it that we should be grateful at any dom who comes our way is your own reading- I didn't get any such impression from the statement.

As far as taking offense to the "under a rock" you can substitute any metaphorical image that you like, it means the same thing. How about "You can't walk 10 paces online without running into a dozen subs"? It's true.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 38

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/9/2006 7:14:21 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

Well....subs ARE a dime a dozen.

While you may choose to view yourself so cheaply....I choose not to.....and I would have to think that there are others here that believe that they too are worth more than a dime a dozen.

As for the "under a rock" statement....how you can view that in the same light as walking ten paces online and finding a dozen subs is completely beyond me.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 39

RE: Young Master / Mature Submissive - 1/9/2006 7:19:18 AM

MrDiscipline44

Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin
Creatures that dwell under rocks are worms and slugs. The statement implies that we are the throw aways or the desperate of the lifestyle world. It implies that we are a dime a dozen and should be grateful should some sympathetic dominant cast their attentions our way. Well that is pure bull shit.

Well....subs ARE a dime a dozen.

I think reading into it that we should be grateful at any dom who comes our way is your own reading- I didn't get any such impression from the statement.

As far as taking offense to the "under a rock" you can substitute any metaphorical image that you like, it means the same thing. How about "You can't walk 10 paces online without running into a dozen subs"? It's true.

Well, that would actually be stated as "You can't walk 10 paces without running into a dozen 40+ subs." It seems that these ladies have taken offence to what I said because it may just be true. But then, what can they expect when they, themselves segragate themselves because of their age? ANY group that does such things will tend to find themselves to be a dying breed. (no pun intended.)

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 40

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