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what would other subbies do if their Master lied to them?


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what would other subbies do if their Master lied to them? - 2/3/2009 3:43:19 PM   
fadwar


Posts: 7
Joined: 1/28/2009
Status: offline 		i had a Master who lied to me often i finally got wise and realized i just was not enough for Him. maybe i should have treated Him like any other man ..........but He was my Master.
i asked to be released but it still hurts me very bad.
what would other subbies have done? i am just curious
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 3:47:17 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		I'm not a "subbie" but if he lied often..I would simply walk away. I wouldn't say I was leaving or anything else..I would just walk.

If it wasn't often then it would have to depend on what the lie was and if I thought we could repair the relationship.




(in reply to fadwar)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 4:02:57 PM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		Maybe he just wasn't enough of a real person to be a master, and it wasn't that you weren't enough but that he wasn't up to being in a real relationship. Good for you for getting out of an abusive situation. A lying jerk is a lying jerk, no matter what other names we may call them. I'd have used his toothbrush to clean the toilet before I walked. well not really but i would have thought of it!



_____________________________

Wait! Are those my pants?
If it has testicle or tires, it's gonna give you the fidgets.
Pretend I said something witty and laugh.

(in reply to littlewonder)
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RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 4:03:46 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fadwar

what would other subbies have done? i am just curious


That depends. What did he lie about?

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to fadwar)
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RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 4:37:31 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Stopped submitting. I don't submit to someone I can't trust.
And I would learn from it that I needed to improve my judgment skills when it came to choosing partners. I'd be a lot more careful in the future to take the time to really know the other person before I could submit.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to AquaticSub)
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RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 4:46:12 PM   
bamagirl4u


Posts: 151
Joined: 12/25/2008
Status: offline 		He lied--I left...took two years of heartache with me...but I am stronger now. 

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~Don't settle for the One you can live with~~Wait for the One you can't live without.~
~To thine own self be true~~no compromise.~

(in reply to AquaticSub)
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RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 5:04:31 PM   
curiousINct


Posts: 85
Joined: 8/18/2008
Status: offline 		His lies are not a reflection on you not being enough, they are a reflection on his inability to tell the truth.

Walking away is the only option sometimes, in any type of a relationship.

(in reply to fadwar)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 6:12:37 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		First, I would want to know why he felt he had to lie to me.

After that, it all comes down to whether or not I can live with the answer. If I can, I stay, if I can't, I walk.

Pretty simple.

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If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to fadwar)
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RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 6:15:18 PM   
CatdeMedici


Posts: 2257
Joined: 10/20/2008
Status: offline 		I don't lie, but I would expect him to call Me on it, discuss it then make his decisions regarding trust.

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I am the Cat, holder of the whip and chair.

"Let's see-whips, dips, chains, chips, yep sounds like a party to Me!"

(in reply to fadwar)
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RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 6:18:05 PM   
sweetnurseBBW


Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline 		It depends on the lie. If he was being deceitful then I would just tell him bye.  Someone that doesn't have enough respect for me to tell me the truth doesn't deserve much more than a goodbye in my book.

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to fadwar)
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RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 6:33:57 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline 		I would check His ID because I'd be sure He wasn't MY Master.  He doesn't lie as He has no need to..............luci

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To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to fadwar)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 6:35:39 PM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline 		I'd dip out. There would be none of this 'asking to be released' mess...

_____________________________

HBIC



(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 6:38:35 PM   
corsetgirl


Posts: 824
Joined: 5/22/2004
Status: offline 		I would walk, tell him that I would wish him well, good luck, and then never look back.  I guess it just boils down to someone who is not honest with me as I would want to be open with them.

(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 7:07:35 PM   
RealSub58


Posts: 1073
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fadwar

i had a Master who lied to me often i finally got wise and realized i just was not enough for Him. maybe i should have treated Him like any other man ..........but He was my Master.
i asked to be released but it still hurts me very bad.
what would other subbies have done? i am just curious


Do you like being lied to?Do you like being deceived?Did the "master" have a cock and balls?   He was a man and he mastered only deception yet you still believe he was more than a mortal man?Master is a title.  Subbie is a title. I am not a subbie, but a submissive. There are men and women and they give each other titles.The only man who ever demanded I call him master wasa master manipulator, liar, deception artist, player and had no regrets. You realized you were not good enough for him?If that is so, possibly it is because he thought of you no more thana subbie doormat and he had 2 rules ~ as all masters do.When you hear these 2 rules, you run like a bat out of hell.No matter how good a man says he is at being a master. . .  RUN !!1. I, the master, am always right.  2. If you are unsure, repeat rule #1. See  (*bats eyelashes) that makes me a master now cause I can type THE rules.If you did not repeat his behaviour (there are always 3 sides to the story)then you were too good for him. Grieve no more!  LIVE LAUGH SING REJOICE *** YOU ARE FREE OF HIM!!

the meaning of my name says it all, its very 'me'.
What is "fadwar" or what's a "fadwar?"

< Message edited by RealSub58 -- 2/3/2009 7:14:17 PM >

(in reply to fadwar)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 7:13:59 PM   
DavanKael


Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline 		Looking at this within a relational context, regardless of D/s dynamics, the answer for me remains the same: if the lies are about something that isn't a deal-breaker, I'd try to address the situation and if it didn't get squared away, I'd give him the boot.  If the lies were deal-breaking lies, the boot would occur upon becoming aware of the lies.
  Davan

_____________________________

May you live as long as you wish & love as long as you live
-Robert A Heinlein

It's about the person & the bond,not the bondage
-Me

Waiting is

170NZ (Aka:Sex God Du Jour) pts

Jesus,I've ALWAYS been a deviant
-Leadership527,Jeff

(in reply to RealSub58)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 7:15:13 PM   
oSinfullySweeto


Posts: 11
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		You did the right thing ... don't second guess your decision!
 
My Master and I have no tolerance for lies, liars or mind games.  We established this very early on in our relationship.  There has to be trust, respect, honesty and love for a relationship to flourish, any type of relationship and including a D/s - M/s relationship.
 


_____________________________

"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart."
--Helen Keller

(in reply to corsetgirl)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 7:52:09 PM   
whis31


Posts: 143
Joined: 5/28/2007
Status: offline 		i found out that my former Sir was lying to me thru his teeth, told him to take a hike and i was out of there.

(in reply to oSinfullySweeto)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 8:41:06 PM   
RealSub58


Posts: 1073
Status: offline 		How can anyone quantify lies as deal breakers or not deal breakers.One small lie that is not a deal breaker can snowball into something so huge !! Many lies that are not deal breakers says the person is a lying machine ~~  but its all good?? Nope.  This says to me, a liar tolerates a liar.

(in reply to whis31)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/3/2009 8:45:51 PM   
NYLass


Posts: 409
Joined: 12/30/2008
Status: offline 		Tell him to take a hike.

(in reply to RealSub58)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: what would other subbies do if their Master lied to... - 2/4/2009 5:09:02 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RealSub58

How can anyone quantify lies as deal breakers or not deal breakers.One small lie that is not a deal breaker can snowball into something so huge !! Many lies that are not deal breakers says the person is a lying machine ~~  but its all good?? Nope.  This says to me, a liar tolerates a liar.

Not everyone is as rigid in their thinking as you are. For me, there are some lies that are acceptable, and some that are not...it's as simple as that. The ones that I find acceptable can be discussed and compromised on.
Personally, I would rather want to know what was wrong in my relationships that a partner felt the need to lie before walking out the door and possibly throwing away something good.


_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to RealSub58)
Profile   Post #: 20
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