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ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Neither one is a gift. It's simply a part of our personalities we are attracted to.

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ORIGINAL: Prinsexx

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ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

A  few months back I started a thread called Submission a gift?

I  had intendeded to follow that up with this thread within a week and then work schedules went awry so here it is!

From the view of both sides of the slash; how do you look at Dominance? A  means to an end if your on  the "D" side or a matter of submission  to a greater being is your on the " s"  side?
Does a dominant owe a sufficient volume of consideration to his/her sub/slave to consider it a gift or a responsibility to maintain her/him in some balanced equation. If you on the " s" side is your opposite slash partner relationship with you viewed as a gift?

Thoughts anyone?

C  P

Domination is a gift. Worth waiting for. Great on special occasions. Best when freely fiven. Besy when one feels one deserves it and is worthy of the gift. Worth workng hard for.
Not always an appropriate gift. Sometimes given with one hand a taken away with the other.
Sometimes withheld.
Often beautifully wrapped but disappointing on the inside.
Rarely given unconditionally... such is the way of the world.
I still got gifts hidden away in secret memory places where I can get them out  and remember them with fondness.
You know when the gifts are right then I am insatiable and cannot get enough.

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ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

~Fast Reply~

I take a somewhat unpopular view on the idea of gifts - they don't have to come in boxes and they don't have to be tangible as I think of several things off-hand that can be given but don't apply. Such as houses and wedding services (since mine is on the brain).

I believe that many things are gifts. His presence in my life and therefore his domination, his love and everything else is a precious gift. The love of my friends is a beautiful gift and I hope that I give as much to others as they do to me.

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ORIGINAL: agirl

There's no doubt that M is the greatest giver between him and I. I don't have as much to offer him as he does me. I can't help that or alter it. That's just the way it is.

I don't even bother thinking about or equating these things as *gifts*. I appreciate everything he's done and does and will continue to do so.

I'm just bored with the whole *gift* analogy. It's so tired and dull these days.
 
 
agirl,
 
I n addressing the issue, it is not so about tangible things but the intangiblr regardless which way it flows. thanks for your thoughts.
 
CP


agirl

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From the view of both sides of the slash; how do you look at Dominance

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ORIGINAL: catize

A dominant is not a ‘greater being’.  I have agreed to submit because it is the type of relationship I want.  I think of them as men, human and fallible, but they have the qualities and character which allow me to trust them to take the lead.
Dominance may be a gift if we consider the word ‘gift’ to mean talent. I have the desire to submit, but it takes a certain aptitude on their part to evoke my surrender and bring it to fruition.     

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ORIGINAL: feydeplume

I will happily come down on the gift as in talent and gift as in blessing or unexpected delight and joy, but not in the object or experience given purely for the joy of the other person and our delight in seeing them happy sense.

That said, there have been some great people that have stepped in and given freely of their Dominance to me when i was in "frenzy" and didn't ask for anything in return, no strings attached, just making sure a person they cared for was safe and moving forward on their path. But the gift they gave me was love, acceptance, understanding, not the Dominance itself.

*yeah i KNOW i need to back off the coffee and morning posting thing*

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ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici

I don't see either side of the kneel as a gift, I see it as a preference in relationship style-the only gift I see is when two people have that mutual feeling that they want to grow into a relationship because its so damn hard to find a mate these days--after that I see both sides owning the responsibility to make it succeed. I assume and expect the same level of work, commitment, responsibility, communication and devotion that I am willing to put in.

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ORIGINAL: DesFIP

We find our presence in each other's lives to be great gifts. A last chance at happiness we never thought we could have or deserve. We are grateful to each other for being complementary to ourselves. Together we are more than we could be alone.

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ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

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ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

~Fast Reply~

I take a somewhat unpopular view on the idea of gifts - they don't have to come in boxes and they don't have to be tangible as I think of several things off-hand that can be given but don't apply. Such as houses and wedding services (since mine is on the brain).

I believe that many things are gifts. His presence in my life and therefore his domination, his love and everything else is a precious gift. The love of my friends is a beautiful gift and I hope that I give as much to others as they do to me.

Aquatic,

But why do you consider that to be unpopular?

C P

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catize,

then can it be said that your submission is a gift/?

CP  

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ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I think where people get twisted is in the thinking that the role is a gift.  I don't particularly see it that way.  However, the person in the role can be seen that way.

I know My life is richer for the people in it.  That goes for My husband, My sub, and a very particular little person who stands about three feet tall.  If she wasn't a "gift" in My life, I can't imagine who possibly could be.

Sure, we can all argue about whether gifts are just given or whether they have strings attached.  It kind of reminds Me of the debate of whether or not there is such a thing as a selfless good deed. 

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ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

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ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I think where people get twisted is in the thinking that the role is a gift.  I don't particularly see it that way.  However, the person in the role can be seen that way.

I know My life is richer for the people in it.  That goes for My husband, My sub, and a very particular little person who stands about three feet tall.  If she wasn't a "gift" in My life, I can't imagine who possibly could be.

Sure, we can all argue about whether gifts are just given or whether they have strings attached.  It kind of reminds Me of the debate of whether or not there is such a thing as a selfless good deed. 

L P

but but, is offering dominance over an "s"  a gift or not?

C P

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ORIGINAL: chamberqueen

I can already tell that my viewpoint won't be popular but I DO see dominance - done well - as a gift.  I can say that coming from the viewpoint of having been a Domme and knowing how well I got to know my subs and their desires and how much work I put into making sure that they were fulfilled and then becoming a slave.  I knew that my Master worked with my personality in a different way than he did with anyone else he'd ever been with.

Anyone can give commands.  To take the time to carefully plan things out to make your sub grow - not just in her ability to please you but as a person - is truly a gift.  It takes time and thought.  Doms often offer guidance, protection, some amount of affection, and of course attention.  Some are like a knight in shining armor riding in to the rescue when vanilla things start to go wrong. 

When I first became a sub I didn't realize that there are times when a Dom needs to put as much trust in their sub as the sub needs to in the Dom.  It may not happen in all relationships since typically one person gives commands and the other follows, but there are siuations when a sub is much more than just a play partner or one who does mundane service just to make the Dom's life easier.  I felt that the amount of trust shown in me was a beautiful gift in itself. 

Would he still be a Dom without me?  Without a doubt.  It is in his nature.  Would he be as good a Dom if I would never been in his life?  I don't think so.  That may be the greatest gift that I got from the relationship; knowing that there were things that I did that changed his life in very positive ways.  We were a true team; Master and slave, close friends, and teachers of each other throughout our journey.  Because he exerted his domination in a manner that showed that he cared about me as a person first and as a slave second, even though I always stayed in role as a slave, was an incredible gift.  I just wish that more subs could see just how hard it is to be a truly good Dom.  It is a whole lot more than just giving commands for a person's selfish pleasure.