RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (Full Version)

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RUBondage -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (12/5/2006 4:57:06 PM)

i just started into this, but in my opinion from my little experience i have and my past vanllia experiences is that it depends on the personality of the the other person, if they are aggressive and dominant from the start then i feel submissive and usually let them take the lead, but if they are making me make the first move then i become dominant, but at some points it depends on my mood, which half the time leaves me neutral, being so new its kinda hard to tell



beltainefaerie -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (12/6/2006 11:55:26 PM)

For me, it can be mood or context.  In the same room with my brat and my Master, I switch fluidly in interactions with them.  I am usually more submissive, but her jubiliant defiance and brattiness brings out the Domme and sadist in me, which we both enjoy.  Master also enjoys thinking up things for me to do to her and occasionally we play with her together, though she has to be in more of a calm sub mood than a brat mood for that to work.  If she was bratty to him, there could be serious trouble!
Also, days where I have had to be super in control and taken care of everyone, I'm always in more of a mood to surrender.

I'm not sure whether the moods line up with my moon cycles at all. That would be interesting to check.



BootBlackBlast -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (12/7/2006 1:32:33 AM)

For me it's a relationship thing so far. With my girlfriend, I am almost always the top but on rare occasion we get into a mood where I end up on the bottom to her. It often happens when I'm going through a very rough or stressful patch in our lives. Sometimes I just feel the need to not have to be the responsible one, the one making all the decisions and laying down the rules. In the rest of my life I am pretty dominant. On rare occasion I come across someone who really makes me think about wanting to bottom to them. But in nearly all those cases it's for the sake of education. It's because I want to learn something new from someone I know is a master at that aspect of play. I can't explain it, it is just a feeling I get when I feel like there is something that I need to learn or some experience I need to have.



PoeticPrincess -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (12/7/2006 1:48:21 AM)

Im a natural submissive, but when my Dom feels like being pampered I can turn up the Dom-style pressure and put him into an erotic revere by coming on strong with the fetish clothing and a spare toy (or two)...
Doms have to work hard to keep me interested, so why shouldnt they enjoy my creativity now and then? It wouldnt work for me if I had a boring lazy sub who expected me to be the magician and lay on fireworks whilst he sat like a child at Christmas.... its about give and take, and boy do I love to Give!!



ScienceBoy -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (12/8/2006 4:34:26 AM)

Golly. I don't know.. the direction of the wind? Apricots falling on children in Guam? Stamping butterfly?

I sit firmly on the fence and switch like blinking - if you can take me down by strength or guile, I'm yours. Until you show weakness, when I'll kick your ass :)



candycoatedtoxin -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (12/8/2006 8:13:34 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ScienceBoy

Golly. I don't know.. the direction of the wind? Apricots falling on children in Guam? Stamping butterfly?

I sit firmly on the fence and switch like blinking - if you can take me down by strength or guile, I'm yours. Until you show weakness, when I'll kick your ass :)

You know, you just described me in two sentences. I don't think I could have worded it better. [:)]



FangsNfeet -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (12/11/2006 3:50:40 AM)

Well, what's your defintion of a switch?

For me, masochisim does not equal submission. Just because I like giving and taking pain, I don't see myself a switch but others do. I've given demands to be bitten, clawed, and cut in the past. I didn't submit to anothers will, I just wanted things my way as the person in charge. So I'm still All Dom regardless of who is holding the knife.   



carpezen -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (12/15/2006 2:48:12 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: candycoatedtoxin

quote:

ORIGINAL: ScienceBoy

Golly. I don't know.. the direction of the wind? Apricots falling on children in Guam? Stamping butterfly?

I sit firmly on the fence and switch like blinking - if you can take me down by strength or guile, I'm yours. Until you show weakness, when I'll kick your ass :)

You know, you just described me in two sentences. I don't think I could have worded it better. [:)]




that would be me!



Masterjay777 -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (12/15/2006 2:53:59 PM)

Greetings



chefandsouse -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (12/16/2006 8:18:46 PM)

honestly, i thought i was only being kinky....well i knew i wanted to submit to her....Id thought about it before but she freed me from my chains of inhabition while binding me in the rapture of  subdual. We are both inclined to bottom but for me , my desire to switch is to fulfill her needs and wants. We both love surrendering to each other and often take turns either per session, or every other day.This is mostly concerning sex only, we are both equals in life as well as anyother thing i figure. I find that in the Switch, I am able to trade some of my stronger talents with her stronger talents. Sometimes we find a little one-up-manship, but that is taken care of with ensuing torture/punishment/discapline. When this happens the other is reminded that theres a safeword, and thats all you really have to say about anything.... then usually after the session we can have a little tutorial , so to say.. This is working out pretty well for us now.I have found myself becoming more comfortable administering to her now that I have submitted to her because we know were both going to get pretty much the same treatment , nothing too much more or less extreme, as the other..When she says I can be harder, i know that Im in for it!so its win win for me! I never thought I would like to be the top, but i do soo very much enjoy giving her pleasure,and having known the bliss of subjectation I can appreciate her want for it as well.



Slavebitch11 -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (12/21/2006 2:28:49 PM)

I never switch during sessions. with my Master, I'm always sub and with my own sub, I'm always Domme. Naturally submissive, I'm gaining confidence in my dominant role.




quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

quote:

i could never switch with the same person.


Yeah, I hear that. I know people who do, but I think I'd have a mental block, not to mention a quick funeral if I tried it with Himself. lol

Celeste



Grlwithboy -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (12/21/2006 3:51:11 PM)

Maybe once every 3-5 years I find opportunity, a beautiful woman with a cane or paddle and attitude,  and the knowledge that we ALL deserve a spanking eventually. Then it's all out of my system again.



jthorne -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (12/23/2006 3:55:48 PM)

Hmm. For me it's the vibe. Also the experience. I have had enough bad experiences with dommes that it's gotta be one special woman who can truly bring out my sub side now. I find that I crave control with most of the people I'm with, probably because they're ineffective at taking control themselves.

So what would trip my switch? A good domme! [:D]



softcoresicko -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (2/2/2007 11:19:59 AM)

Such interesting responses, and such thought provoking comments.  Almost makes me wish I had more experience so I could give a better answer.

I call myself a switch out of convenience.  I'm not interested in being a sub, at least on a permanent basis, nor do I have the sheer force of will that seems necessary to be a good Dom.  Rather, my hope is for an equal partnership outside of the bedroom, and kinky play within, without worries about who is the top and who is the bottom.  I'm more interested in what we will do together, rather than who is in control; my view is that it's less important who suggests the particular activity, and more important that it's something we both can enjoy.  So, I call myself a switch, because it seems to describe me better than the other labels, though it still seems to fail in capturing my true interests.

Sorry for the naive ramblings; I'm still looking to find where I fit in the lifestyle (which is yet another reason I consider myself a switch, at least for now).



OffTheBeatenTrak -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (2/4/2007 9:55:04 AM)

 
Being relative unexpirenced in terms of play i can only comment on the personality side of the my switches. There is a few factors that can cause a switch most being link to my level of confidence. The more confident i am the more dominant i become. As my confidence can be exstreamly changable i tend to look at my self as a switch.

1. When doing an activity (not nessacerly play) if i know what i'm doing then my confidence rises, hence i become more dominant wanting to be the person to do and to do it my way. Were as if i don't know what i'm doing or how to do it i tend to be withdrawn and submissive, following the dominant personality.
2. Also the nature of the people that surround me can often switch me. If the people arround me are sub in nature the i tend to switch to a more dom personality. Were as if the people are dom in nature then the oppisite is true, becoming a more sub personality.
3. Occassionaly events in day to day life can switch me from one personality to another.
4. I can switch by choice sometimes if i believe it's with in my interest to do so. Although occasionaly this switch can only manifest in the personality i present to other people rather than what going through my head.
5. Some times i just switch for reasons unkown to me, could be just my mood has influanced my personality.

Some times it can be a combination of reason. I suppose there is different reasons for different people.



OffTheBeatenTrak -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (2/4/2007 10:13:15 AM)

 
Being relative new my self i can whole heartedly see were your coming from. I do also find it hard to see my place with in the life style were i would fit, mainly because i don't know enough make a judgement about my place. Although it could be that i'm looking to hard to find my place and may be i should stop looking and let my place find me.

I'm currently look at the point of view that i dubt i couldn't be a good dom with out knowing what it is to be a sub and isa versor.



obey1 -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (2/14/2007 2:02:35 AM)

What a very honest response, welcome to the forum.



ArgoGeorgia -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (2/15/2007 8:39:12 PM)

For me it is dependent upon the person I'm with and the direction they lean in and whether or not my boss has pissed me off recently.  Usually it's the person I'm with though.



pickingrinnin -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (2/16/2007 8:07:23 PM)

It tends to relate more to the mood of my partner.  I can happily and easily dominate or submit at any given time (or do both simultaneously), so I usually just figure out what her mood is and proceed from there.

- Jesse



AriakeRattus -> RE: So what causes Y/your Switch? (2/22/2007 12:40:25 AM)

To start, both my Daddy and I are switch.  I am mainly submissive, though there do come the lovely times when he curls up with his head on my leg and stares up at me with the best innocent look he can manage, and then we hand off our roles for a while. Tis a lovely thing, a true switch relationship.

Before He came along, I was a very fiery little female. I had never once been submissive to anyone, not even in long past relationships. Then he came along, and I found a sense of security and satisfaction I had never before experienced until becoming his little girl. I am not naturally submissive. I like to be in control, I like power, though I am not one to abuse it. I had always been in control as so to speak until he came and (literally) swept me of my feet.

I find myself to be more dominating when I feel the need to protect and care for someone. I have a compulisve urge to tend to them, to hold them when they are scared, to direct them when needed, and I get the greatest since of satisfaction when I sit down and they lay their head across my lap, when I can watch them and see subtle behaviours that only I understand. It's the little things that really get me.
I aldo have noticed that I am far more dominant with women.
I can be a bit of a bitch around over cocky, sex driven males, though it's not a trend.
As far as being submissive, it generally comes to me when I want to be taken care of. No relationship before has given me this, and to be able to give myself completely to someone, in absolute love and trust, is what turns that submissive switch. Once turned, it becomes a undeniable, overwhelming urge to please the one who is taking care of me. To do whatever possible to please, and in a sense, care for my Daddy. There is not a more soothing set of sounds than "Good girl, I love you."

For me, it's more about the emotional levels, than the s&m involved, though I do enjoy the blunt pain of Daddys thick red oak paddle. I personally don't like any play anvolving sharp objects, it does nothing for me, I prefer blunt pain. However He loves blade play, anything sharp really. When we switch, it does give us a chance to revel in the types of things we like.

It depends honestly, on how we are feeling and what we want. I could just as quickly find myself at his feet, untying him, handing him his blade and asking permission to get a drink, just as quickly as he could go from scolding me to sitting at my feet purring "Yes mam" into my thigh.



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