RE: Low Income Dominants. (Full Version)

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impishlilhellcat -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/4/2006 1:53:26 PM)

I don't have a problem with low income Dominants. It's Dominants that cannot support themselves that I have an issue with. I don't want a Dominant who is expecting me to support his every move or hobby etc... At least not until we both make the decision that he is off pursing school or something worthwhile together. At the same time I am also not expecting someone to support me so I extend the same courtesy to them that I ask for them to extend to me.



IronBear -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/4/2006 1:54:29 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sumimara

quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear

quote:

ORIGINAL: FelinePersuasion

If you can't even take care of yourself hardly making it or moments away from destitution you shouldn't take another person's care on.


Soooo, you would fix a minimal income level for all Dominants and those who didn't pass you would kick them out from the lifestyle.... Yes?


Not sure whether or not this subject has become the proverbial dead horse... I wanted to read this thread before responding to the "Low Income Sub" topic.
 
I agree with FelinePersuasion, and will clarify my stance.

If you cannot manage your own life, regardless of your income level then you really have no business taking on the managing of anyone else's life.
 
IronBear:  There was nothing in the statement that she made that implied that there should be a fixed income level for Dominants - it is a question of how responsible a person is with what they have.  


Sumimara, I do wish you would read what you quoted and then read it again paying attention to my response to Feline.. You will see that I ended it with the word "Tes" followed by a question mark. This by all the standards which I was taught made it a question to her and in effect asking if what I had said was right and if not to clarify her comment. Thus your comment to me is irrelevant, Dont you agree? All of that being said, I'm glad you have taken the time to read the thread and if no one esle has said so welcome to CM..



bipolarber -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/4/2006 3:15:39 PM)

Speaking as someone who probably qualifies as a LID, I can tell you that the size of my bank account has little to nothing to do with my sense of self esteem, or worth. There ARE people out there who look on material wealth as a kind of aphrodesiac, just as there are size queens, people who prefer other races to the exclusion of their own, and other forms of discrimination. Pity them. They close themselves off to some wonderful possibilities.

The other thing it might help you to remember is: if you earn over $2,500 a year, then you make more than 85% of the world population. Make a list of the things you really NEED in your life. Food, shelter, clothing, transportation, health care on occasion. Chances are, you have those things. Now, don't you feel like a jerk?



Wulfchyld -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/4/2006 3:37:54 PM)

Bipolarber

Was that a fast reply or did you just call IB a jerk?



Sumimara -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/4/2006 4:29:28 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: bipolarber

Speaking as someone who probably qualifies as a LID, I can tell you that the size of my bank account has little to nothing to do with my sense of self esteem, or worth. There ARE people out there who look on material wealth as a kind of aphrodesiac, just as there are size queens, people who prefer other races to the exclusion of their own, and other forms of discrimination. Pity them. They close themselves off to some wonderful possibilities.

The other thing it might help you to remember is: if you earn over $2,500 a year, then you make more than 85% of the world population. Make a list of the things you really NEED in your life. Food, shelter, clothing, transportation, health care on occasion. Chances are, you have those things. Now, don't you feel like a jerk?


Who exactly are you responding to?   If that "jerk" comment is directed at what I wrote the answer is "No, actually I don't."  
 
No one gave me anything, what I have I have because I have worked for it, I refuse to apologize for being able to enjoy the fruits of my labor, I set my goals early on and I worked towards achieving them.  Why should I or anyone who has achieved what they set out to achieve feel bad because there are those who have not, will not or are content as cows in a pasture with some other kind of life?    If you are content as a "LID" then more power to you, but I for one do not romanticize the concept of poverty.   Also, I am fairly offended at your putting having a healthy bank balance and what it represents in the same category as racism.   You imply that if one is successful then money has to be what the attraction is - what a ridiculous, small minded way to live.  
 
I am certain that there are lots and lots of submissives who would be thrilled to experience the "wondeful possibilities" that you offer rather than having to face the horrifying and tedious experiences that the "other half" has to offer like living in a lovely home, traveling the globe, getting an education, and being able to go to sleep at night without having to worry about evil money issues, we all have our standards, and we all make choices about what the "wonderful possibilities" are. 
 
 
And as for the rest of the world...people leave their homelands and come to the US because they want better lives for themselves and their families than the $2500 per annum that you use as the foundation for your argument about the joys of poverty can bring them.   For the record  I donate not only my time, but my money to organizations that help children escape the grinding poverty that comes with the $2500 that you quoted. It's one of those goals I set for myself and followed through on, something I wouldn't be able to do if I sat around glorifying the joys of not making ends meet.  If you got a first hand look at how horrible that existence is you wouldn't be so quick to put on the mantle of romantic hero because you make more a year than a worker in a third world country, you have unlimited opportunity in this country, what you choose to do with that opportunity depends on what you have set out to do.  


So, Reader's Digest Version:  "No, I don't feel like a jerk."
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 



Tamerofwild1s -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/6/2006 2:46:08 PM)

people . in a lifestyle that is constantly looked down by those vanilla people out there . do we really need to look down on one another .. come on . we are all sharing a common thread of life .. we  want the alternative lifestyle . if I can't take you to a opera in philadelphia does that truely mean I can't control you. if I make ends meet from one paycheck to another does that mean I am too inexperienced for you .. or is it in fact the mentality of what I bring to the table is what you truely seek . I am not blasting anyone in perticular  with this post . I just thnk we need to stop looking at superficial things like money and look deeper inside . all the answers we seek are there anyway .... we just need to open our inner eye and see it all .. no one should be critized by a community that is supposed to be sticking together for a better lifestyle
 
but thats just my humble opinion



kittenFC -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/6/2006 3:51:31 PM)

kitten has had it both ways and to tell the truth kitten would rather have just the necessities of life and a DECENT caring Master that looks out for His slaves wellbeing. "shrugs" Money cant buy ya happiness just extra toys. GRINS



Lordandmaster -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/6/2006 4:14:36 PM)

I'm glad you've started commenting in the forums, Tamer.  I've noticed a few of your recent posts and like your point of view.



Tamerofwild1s -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/6/2006 7:24:56 PM)

Thank you .. I only speak of whatI know or feel . this is who I am .... and I thank you all who have allowed me to voice my opinions



Lordandmaster -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/6/2006 7:26:30 PM)

Yeah, and your stupid comment about the Jewish legal guardian on the "For those still needing a reason to hate this SOB" thread just made me change my mind.



Tamerofwild1s -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/6/2006 7:45:19 PM)

you my friend have no idea what I dealt with and I think we should keep these threads to the topics discussed in them . if you have something against me it's simple to move on or e-mail me and voice your opinions as others have. Have a nice day



Lordandmaster -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/6/2006 7:55:02 PM)

I have nothing against you--I don't even know you--but I'd like to know how it mattered that he was Jewish.  Bigoted statements don't go over well in the forums.

And I responded on that thread too.



UtopianRanger -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/6/2006 8:24:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

I have nothing against you--I don't even know you--but I'd like to know how it mattered that he was Jewish.  Bigoted statements don't go over well in the forums.

And I responded on that thread too.


Maybe he was just trying to impersonate Howard Stern? Homie is a DJ, ya know.....



 - R



Tenire -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/6/2006 9:28:00 PM)

I have to agree with Tamer, myself. I don't make a whole lot, since I'm working my way through my trradeschool, but it's more than some make. It meets my needs with a little left over on occasion.

That doesn't have anything to do with the hand spanking my girl's bottom, reminding her who her Daddy is and taking her to that loving place. When I grab my other girl by her hair and take a kiss from her mouth, she doesn't check my wallet before feeling the passion on my lips. 

We all live fairly hand-to-mouth, all three of us. But we still love one another, care for one another's needs, and stick by one another. And I'm still Daddy.

Sumimara
Congrats on your flourishing portfolio and your fat bank account. I admire you for having the determination and discipline you posess which have apparently served you well. In time I will be able to say as much, myself, though I doubt I will feel the need. I've not been one to brag about such things.

I also feel it is more important what you strive to do, as opposed to what kindsa material possessions you have lying about, that makes somebody worthwhile.

However, you seem shortsighted, and perhaps sensitized and I'll show you the basis of this opinion in a moment. I feel you were wrong in calling out bipolerber and making a mention of race seem like a "race-card" remark. in honesty it seems like you are pulling the "race-card" . That is inexcusable and a sign of weakness, giving me the impression that you couldn't find any more poo to fling, so you made some.

quote:

ORIGINAL: bipolarber

Speaking as someone who probably qualifies as a LID, I can tell you that the size of my bank account has little to nothing to do with my sense of self esteem, or worth. There ARE people out there who look on material wealth as a kind of aphrodesiac, just as there are size queens, people who prefer other races to the exclusion of their own, and other forms of discrimination. Pity them. They close themselves off to some wonderful possibilities.

Sumimara

Also, I am fairly offended at your putting having a healthy bank balance and what it represents in the same category as racism.   You imply that if one is successful then money has to be what the attraction is - what a ridiculous, small minded way to live. 


I'm sorry, but that just wasn't kosher. I couldn't see any implication of the kind in his text.

You speak of "Romanticizing poverty" . I don't have alot of material things. I have the tools I earn my living with, and a few nice things here and there that I call my own. I also have friends that will stick by my side, that have my back even when my wallet's on the skinny. I have two girls that love me dearly, even when we're all sweating it until payday.
I may be a Low Income Dominant, but I'm not poor by any means.



hizgeorgiapeach -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/7/2006 7:49:46 AM)

Having just read through the vast majority of the posts on this thread, and jumping in late, I still find myself a tad compelled to add my 2 cents worth in here.   (Though, considering the rate of inflation over the past couple of decades, perhaps that should now be considered my 25 cents worth LOL)
 
There have been points made by several which I agree with, at least in part - far to many and to spread across the thread to quote anyone in particular.  There have also (as always) been points raised by those whom I find myself completely disagreeing with. 
 
To the person who mentioned the price of living (including retirement) being in/near the millions I have to ask : What the heck portion of the US (or other country) do you live in????  Granted, Oklahoma has a lower cost of living than many places in the US, but not so much so that I should find myself THIS shocked over the prices you mentioned.  Perhaps I've simply led a sheltered life - yet having been a homeowner in the past (I don't own now because I hate doing lawn work) I was stunned by the price tag you placed on a home in a reasonably secure neighborhood.
 
In general, I have to agree with what Padraig said early in this thread - it is much more about fiscal responcibility than it is with sheer size of the bank accounts.  In my own past, I've run the gamut from having a fairly substantial income to living on (literally) $5500 a year while supporting myself and a handicapped child.  I managed as well while living with practically no income, through thoughtful stewardship and prioritization, as I did while living on a substantial income.  (Ok, maybe not "as well" in terms of what the vast majority of western society considers "doing well" ... yet I never had the utilities turned off, we never went without a meal, and we never went without a roof over our heads or decent clothing on our backs.  Personally, I consider that to be meeting the requirements of providing for myself.) 
 
HOWEVER - having said that, I have to be honest and admit that on a very personal level, I AM biased towards those who have the financial means to keep me in the style that I prefer.  There are many reasons - some shallow, some practical. I've had "dominants" in my life (and I use that term VERY loosely in connection with these particular people) who expected me to do Everything - pay the bills, do all the housework and caregiving, ask how high on the way up when they said "jump" - while they literally did nothing other than play games on the computer and complain about how I wasn't doing Enough.  Neither of the two who attempted such were indigent when I met and became involved with them.  Neither of the two lasted long.  Having been put through that in my past, though, I made a decision that I would NEVER be placed in that position again - so if someone doesn't meet certain minimum requirements of income level and stability, they aren't even considered as a potential date, much less as a potential long term partner.  Does this make me a bad person?  Possibly.  Does it Bother me that there are those who will consider me "bad" knowing this?  Not in the slightest.  Self preservation is one of the strongest species instincts, and I ceased to feel guilt about furthering my own self preservation (both physical and emotional)  years ago.



SirEbonyDlite -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/7/2006 8:46:37 AM)

Being a Dominant who so happens to be one who is employed and living on a low income, I can tell you from personal experience that I have been bombarded by "submissives" who were seeking to get money or to ask me to help them (and in some cases, their relatives) relocate from their homeland (wherever that may be), yet when I ask them a question pertaining to the lifestyle, they will do any and everything but answer it honestly. To me, that borders on not only lying, but also attempting to cheat any Dominant ( or for some, submissive) out of their cashflow for their own selfish means.
 
In conclusion, I can also say that as important as this lifestyle is, in some respects it will have to occasionally take a back seat to making sure the rent and bills are paid. In my own search for a submissive/slave, I've unfortunately come across those who were only looking for a free ride and had no intention of doing their part financially. Such leeches are to be avoided at all costs, IMHO. And that is my $0.99 on this topic    



caitlyn -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/7/2006 9:02:18 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster
I have nothing against you--I don't even know you--but I'd like to know how it mattered that he was Jewish.  Bigoted statements don't go over well in the forums.


Perhaps you are being a bit too sensitive.
 
There is a thread on Catholic School Images on this board. I'm Catholic ... should I have a fucking whiney hissy fit and start calling people names?



BreakMeShakeMe -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/7/2006 9:13:10 AM)

Low income is what most live with... but doesn't make them any less able to be who they are. I'm considered low income by NC standards... but hell my girls and I have no needs... sometimes we have wants... but no needs. As for any dom in my life... they're employed or retired with an income of some type.... but being unemployed isn't going to make me not talk to them. It stops me from begining a full time relationship....(specially if they're capable of working but just doesn't want to)



IronBear -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/7/2006 9:31:55 AM)

Again I reitterate that the original thrust of this thread was to ascertain if you all as a group would have a financial cut off point below which you would shun a Dominant, even though he or she may have been with a local BDSM Group for some time prior to his fall in the income stakes, which could easily happen as a resuly of sudden illness or an accident, and by so shunning, the group would loose some one who may have both exoperience and skill which could be passed down to those new to the scene?

I made no reference to subs or slaves being owned or attached to that person. Logic and common sense would indicate tht there may well be financial circumstances whereby it is not practiciple to have some one in a 24/7 live in situation. However this does not mean that the Low Income Dominant can not have a 24/7 non live in or financilally deopendent sub or slave. Nor does it indicate that there is no reason for the Dominant to have one or more play partners any more than on a social basis thay couldn't have a fuck buddy, or does it? Yes there will always be those who only want to associate with people of their own financial and/or social status. However from what I have seen, BDSM like Gor can form it's own hierachial sub groups possibly based on such things as experience or things which are in common and where those who have proven track records can be accepted in many circles irrespective of their fiscal status.... Again there will always be the potential for what in the vernacular be refered to as bums or no hopers. But this applies in all leverls and divides in society.

With some posts which may or may not be either virilent or passionate, I am reminded of the quote: "Me thinkest he(or she) doth protest too much!"

Each person has the god given right to choose the fiscal level of a Dominant with whom you choose to associate with if this is important to you. None have the right to criticise you for wanting to be owned or submit to some one who can help you financially or indeed financially support you. Your choice just as it the choice for a Dominant to choose to take over these responsibilities if they are able or to require you to be self sufficient.



nerak122757 -> RE: Low Income Dominants. (6/7/2006 9:58:27 AM)

I agree with many things stated abut this post, i.e. his bank account should be of no concern, however, if a dom is in dire financial constraints due to poor judgment calls, I'd have to back away from him.  To me, a Dom is one who has made good choices in his life or atleast learned from his poor choices and lifted himself up, dusted himself off and started over again.  By no means am I saying he has to be some financial wonder, but if I'm putting my life and MY finances in his hands, I would want someone with a good track record. 

JMHO
nerak



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