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RE: Seriously - 4/13/2009 5:09:51 AM   
Vinmier


Posts: 41
Joined: 12/5/2008
Status: offline 		Thank you for the pickup this morning, LadyPact. It has brought a smile to my face. :) My Lady tells me the same on occasion, and it's always nice to hear. I think the biggest problem I face, is the constant fear that I'm going to be immediately thought of as one of those guys who will serve until he gets laid. My Lady knows better, but it's an odd feeling logging in and seeing pages and pages of men listed, a handful of female Dom's, all of which have to put "No fakes!" in their profile. Ah well, the plus side, is that I've quite possibly found 'the One' and I'm amazed that I got so lucky. Thank you for the uplifting words, and the reminder that I do have a place and that I belong LadyPact.

(in reply to manxcat)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Seriously - 4/13/2009 6:05:10 AM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		I try never to feel special.  I find that when I allow it there is someone who wants to knock me from that spot. Instead, I feel just as good, just as valuable, just as worthwhile and sometimes even a tinge better.  LOL this sometmes causes me to bristle when someone suggests I lower the "I", or use lower case for my name.
I am not special, nor am I less.
Kyst

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Seriously - 4/13/2009 6:35:44 AM   
ShiftedJewel


Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: InTonguesslave

id really really like to know how...,,, and i know how pathetic that sounds, but you started this..


Hope you don't mind if I though my thoughts in the ring on this one...
 
I have always believed that the true (yes, I used that word) s-types are walking, talking, breathing love. They bring so much dedication, loyalty, sincerity and complete love to the table in their relationships. They are willing to sacrifice, sweat and even bleed for the ones that they choose to serve without demanding all of the same in return. They are the unique and precious gems that sparkle in the dominants lucky enough to have them. They are the fine jewelry as well as the cogs that make the machine run smoothly. Without them we d-types would just be bossy people.... with them we are able to feel almost god-like in the adoration they offer us.
 
That, dear, is why you are all sooooo special.
 
Great post LP... thanks.
 
Jewel
 
(ok, so you caught me on a mushy day... don't shoot me)

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(in reply to InTonguesslave)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Seriously - 4/13/2009 7:40:13 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: subtlebutterfly

Think the topic's awesome!
But kinda spooky that submissives need to be told these things...wonder if dominants need this sort of pep up post too
I'm probably overthinking owell



It is an awesome topic. I can only second what LadyPact has written.

I came into this facet of my life late. I have always said, and will continue to say, that without all of the totally awesome submissives and slaves that I have gotten to know, I would still be clueless. What these men and women have shared with me is priceless. If I ever have another submissive/slave in my life and home again, she will have every one of them/you to thank for the dominant I am today and the one I will be, all the days that follow. I may be making this sound way overly dramatic but if so, that is only because that is how important ALL of you here and those I've met otherwise, are to me and have been to my own growth and education.

And yes, sometimes we need those pep talks too. We just don't always like to admit it.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to subtlebutterfly)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Seriously - 4/13/2009 7:56:53 AM   
subtlebutterfly


Posts: 2230
Joined: 6/15/2008
From: Not your hood
Status: offline 		awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww marshmallow!

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Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Seriously - 4/13/2009 7:58:34 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		Thats LaT!!  Just a fluffy dominant!! 

*ducks and runs*


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Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
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(in reply to subtlebutterfly)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Seriously - 4/13/2009 9:53:15 AM   
InTonguesslave


Posts: 342
Joined: 2/6/2009
Status: offline 		giggles at greedy))).

ive just done an interesting exercise - with this thread in my head and the suggestion that feeling special is only a finger tip away.

i segmented me in a row, giving titles like, woman, mother, daughter, sister, friend, worker, slave, writer, paganistic/spiritual, etc., and i looked at each of these in turn.  i realised that there are things i could improve upon, top up if you like, but that actually, on the whole im doing ok. 

it didnt make me feel especially special but it made me realise that i am unique in who i am and what i do each day and that everyone is.  and because of that i guess, we are special for being the people we are and for what we give.

just wanted to share.  thanks LP, this is a beautiful thread. xx  and that was really a beautiful post SJ, i love this mushy sentimental stuff

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aka lally


(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Seriously - 4/13/2009 10:18:48 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		[I am special but i think many prople are specal and unique. I have always had good self esteem. I did not need a Dom to tell me i am special i had figured that out myself. To know i am special to Master means so very much to me. I am special and special to a wonderful man. If the rest of the world does not see it well then screw em.

Matt's littleone

< Message edited by littleone35 -- 4/13/2009 10:19:52 AM >

(in reply to InTonguesslave)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Seriously - 4/13/2009 11:47:13 AM   
subtee


Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline 		~FR

This is one of the things that is delicious about being an old broad. I'm not looking anymore, just being me and I feel really light and healthy about it all...it's very cool.

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Don't believe everything you think...

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Seriously - 4/14/2009 12:06:24 AM   
LAgirlsub


Posts: 158
Joined: 3/16/2009
Status: offline 		Chamberqueen...I guess this is one point where I see this differently and that might be why I don't think I'll be looking for feeling special (any differently then any other relationship)...you said the dom if they hadn't seen something special in us:

"...they wouldn't have chosen us."

For me, I hope a beautiful, feminine but strong dom doesn't just choose me, I choose her as well - like any relationship. And this may sound like I have a huge ego but frankly she should feel special I wanted to submit to her. I don't know who this first woman will be, but as I hope in all my relationships...she'll meet me halfway. I want to feel like equals when we're not playing but once we do, I want to submit to her, I do want to please her.

Does this make me different from other female subs?

Maybe it's simply not needing external validation for who we are...

(in reply to chamberqueen)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Seriously - 4/14/2009 1:15:46 AM   
littlesarbonn


Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline 		I know I'm special because my mommy says I'm special. For some reason, that usually means I'm not allowed to play with the sharp implements in the toy box, but I'm sure it's meant as a compliment.

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The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman

(in reply to LAgirlsub)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Seriously - 4/14/2009 4:32:24 AM   
subtlebutterfly


Posts: 2230
Joined: 6/15/2008
From: Not your hood
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LAgirlsub

Chamberqueen...I guess this is one point where I see this differently and that might be why I don't think I'll be looking for feeling special (any differently then any other relationship)...you said the dom if they hadn't seen something special in us:

"...they wouldn't have chosen us."

For me, I hope a beautiful, feminine but strong dom doesn't just choose me, I choose her as well - like any relationship. And this may sound like I have a huge ego but frankly she should feel special I wanted to submit to her. I don't know who this first woman will be, but as I hope in all my relationships...she'll meet me halfway. I want to feel like equals when we're not playing but once we do, I want to submit to her, I do want to please her.

Does this make me different from other female subs?

Maybe it's simply not needing external validation for who we are...

Apparently it's going to be me you choose.


< Message edited by subtlebutterfly -- 4/14/2009 4:34:51 AM >

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(in reply to LAgirlsub)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Seriously - 4/14/2009 7:18:45 AM   
chamberqueen


Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/25/2007
From: Kalamazoo, MI
Status: offline 		LAgirlsub, actually we agree completely.  I feel that both partners should choose each other.  If it comes down to it, I chose my Master before he chose me.  He showed such warmth and caring that I knew that he was someone that I could trust. 

I've battled with my own insecurities in my relationship, and I'll admit that sometimes they get the better of me.  My response was, in part, a pep talk for myself as well as others - a reminder that no matter what our position in a poly family is that each of us is special and not just another warm body that could be replaced easily with any of the others.


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(in reply to subtlebutterfly)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Seriously - 4/14/2009 9:29:25 AM   
GoddessTeaze


Posts: 1125
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: The Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet

I can't bring myself to actually respond to this post. I can't even get my mind around what it is others see in me. I just don't see it and that is just a sad fact. I'll even argue them. I don't quite understand it, but words of praise and encouragement cut deeper than any knife. I just don't know how to handle it.

lovingpet


I admire your responds, while you said that you couldn't respond to this post. you did it anyway !! Well done

you see you're not alone with those feelings, it's pretty common
that people have these feelings or miss out on them.

This has to do with your self image.
The famous quote
"to be able to love someone else you've to love yourself first"
ever heard this one before?

The thing is you've got to know how
to love yourself.

And if you don't, then to know how to get there.
There is a way, I also we're in that same spot
where you we're a long time ago,
and I can happily say that I've
found that piece of the puzzle
which made Me a very self assured
woman who loves Herself.

And that feels Awesome !!!

If you want to know more about it,
feel free to email Me.

I wish you enough.

Warm Greetingz

GoddezzT`






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~* The only disability in life is a bad attitude. ~Scott Hamilton*~

~*Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. ~Kahlil Gibran*~

(in reply to lovingpet)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Seriously - 4/14/2009 9:37:37 AM   
slavekal


Posts: 1486
Joined: 7/20/2004
Status: offline 		Ms. Mlicious tells me the same thing.  I guess I should admit that I do a lot for her.  I just suppose I always feel like I could do more. 

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"The Courage to Submit: the submissive male's guide to finding a dominant woman"
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(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Seriously - 4/14/2009 7:03:43 PM   
slvemike4u


Posts: 17896
Joined: 1/15/2008
From: United States
Status: offline 		Perhaps LadyPact a number of us need to see ourselves reflected in the eyes of another to truly realise our worth.To feel complete we need someone else to need us.And yes ,I beleive in any good relationship both parties have to need each other.No matter the power dynamic,what is one without the other.


Thank you so much for the post,short of actually seeing what I'm looking for in another's eyes....this was the sweetest thing.

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If we want things to stay as they are,things will have to change...Tancredi from "the Leopard"

Forget Guns-----Ban the pools

Funny stuff....https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNwFf991d-4


(in reply to slavekal)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Seriously - 4/15/2009 7:24:18 AM   
Dastan


Posts: 148
Joined: 12/13/2008
From: Barranquilla city, Colombia
Status: offline 		Thank you Lady Pact.....surely if you think it is true, it must be, I must asdmit that sometimes, being a Sub is like being just another guy in a Marathon...only 1 Mistress for each 20-30 maleSubs as theys ay, we just feel like any other dog in the pound who might not get adopted and will be put to sleep by life....

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Power without Purpose is the same as an Artist without a Brush

(in reply to wisdomofgiving)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Seriously - 4/16/2009 4:15:34 PM   
littlefairyone


Posts: 2
Joined: 11/30/2008
Status: offline 		i believe that for most this is an easy thing to see. Although, when you have a past of abuse (in and out of the lifestyle) and have been taught to veiw yourself as nothing for more than 12 years it's hard to see what one's Owner sees. i stuggle with this everyday but then i ask myself;  "Do i trust my Master? yes. Do i think or believe He would ever lie to me? absolutely not.", therefore, what He see's must be what's truely there. i think if all of us who have issues with seeing ourselves the way our Masters/Mistresses/Doms/ or Dommes do then just ask yourself those two easy questions. If you can't then A) you are in ther wrong type of relationship. B) there is no relationship cause you can't have one without trust let alone a D/S or BDSM. Trust is first and formost. If you can't trust your Dominate partner then what the hell are you doing in the lifestyle?

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Seriously - 4/16/2009 4:21:31 PM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline 		this thread is so freakin' awesome...

LadyP...you rock!!


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Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Seriously - 4/16/2009 4:25:44 PM   
kallisto


Posts: 1185
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slvemike4u

Perhaps LadyPact a number of us need to see ourselves reflected in the eyes of another to truly realise our worth..



Lots said in that one sentence.  


(in reply to slvemike4u)
Profile   Post #: 60
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