RE: Hard Limits

RE: Hard Limits (Full Version)

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RCdc -> RE: Hard Limits (4/26/2009 7:20:19 AM)
If someone like yourself felt they had to quantify themselves by even bring up anything you did, I would dismiss them and their intentions immediately. If you feel you have to distance yourself from illegal activites like murder or robbery or even consider these to be part of a BDSM environment, I consider you have some serious issues I just wouldn't want to get into. the.dark.

kazzaslave -> RE: Hard Limits (4/26/2009 4:07:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: subinchico Insane, psychotic, mentally challenged humans could be true "no limits" humans. A sane, mentally intact human that says they are a "no limit" slave/sub are stating a fib, misinformation, etc.. Just wondering who are the psychotic humans or fibbing humans on CM? Hi subinchico, First of all, have we met? chatted? had any contact at all? Because this posting is in response to what kazza wrote and as far as she knows we have never so much as exchanged a single message and so you have no way of knowing what her mental state is. For the record, and if you read her post carefully, she has never said that she doesn't have limits, only that she has never felt the need to discuss them with Master Malkinius because she knows he would never do anything to harm her mentally or psychologically. Please don't make judgements of kazza which have no foundation when you have no idea what she is like and who she is.

LAgirlsub -> RE: Hard Limits (4/29/2009 2:39:19 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Domin8tingUrDrmz In my opinion, a slave's limits are set by their owner's and I think it is wise for a slave to learn of their potential owner's morals and desires ahead of time. I think a submissive is one who has limits of their own that their Dominant should at all times respect. Reading this again, I really appreciate that you put this definition of sub and slave so simply...it makes crystal clear that I am a sub not a slave. No one will ever define my limits for me. In fact, it makes my skin crawl when I think about it. Even someone I trust and love deeply. To me that's how I would define having a basic respect for me as a person and a domme who didn't understand that would be someone I would never allow near me.

RavenMuse -> RE: Hard Limits (4/29/2009 3:13:37 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: InTonguesslut quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP http://www.mayhem.net/Crime/robinson.html A serial killer within the realm of BDSM. Ya gotta love it when stuff like this gets dragged out to try and support the 'i have limits' camp. Me too, that they try SO hard and delve into the realms of utter stupidity to do so makes Me wonder just how insecure they must be about their own dynamic. My girl has no limits.... she trusts in Mine.... if I was ever to cross into the realms of utter madness, that trust would be lost, I would have proven I was not the Man she believed she was submitting to and excersise her only right, to withdraw consent and walk away.

Zechriel -> RE: Hard Limits (4/29/2009 3:30:14 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: InTonguesslut I am a no limits slave. I'm not fibbing, i'm not giving misinformation. I take on the limits of my Sir, they are not my limits, they are his. Good morning! After having made a deal with Daddy as "no limits" I became increasingly terrified of having my previous limits acted upon. I kept asking Him "would you REALLY...?" Because he always wanted monogamy before, saying sharing me would just kill Him. And now it's part of the bargain???Well, I guess he got tired of me asking so he read my posts and had my repeat what you said INTongue until I got the lightbulb above the head thingey! lol I get it, and I feel much more calmer and loved again. Thank you for posting your thoughts, it made such a difference in one little life. I am truly grateful. Love, Zechriel [sm=cute.gif]

Her1Obsession -> RE: Hard Limits (5/20/2009 12:10:58 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SilverMoonSlave Hello Everyone... I was wondering what thoughts you have on this. Please forgive me if this has been brought up ad nauseum, I searched and could not find a thread. Now this concerns a situation where you have initially discussed desires and needs and then later on a Master wants you to do something that you know will cause you harm either mentally or physically. I've come across people who feel that a slave should do whatever her Master asks of her... even her absolute hard limit. I consider a hard limit something that I know I can never bring myself to do... not just a 'gee... hmmm... i don't know', but something that I know will disturb me or can cause me true harm. For example, I am not into scat or drinking urine. No matter how much I'd love and desire to please and pleasure my Master, that is something I will not do. I also feel that if He insists and is completely unwavering, even to the point of questioning my loyalty, then there is something off in our relationship. Now don't get me wrong. If I deeply care and love my Master doing anything He asks will be an absolute pleasure... except for true hard limits. I believe when I have a Master He will know me, push my boundaries but at the same time respect me. What say you? Dear SilverMoonSlave, You sound a lot like my pet, (MyLovespet) she asked me the same thing and I respect her HARD LIMITS and I will never love her less... She is my world, and I will protect her and love her and see that no harm comes to her, Follow your and trust your Heart SilverMoonSlave ! May you be as loved an cared for as MyLovespet...

subinchico -> RE: Hard Limits (5/20/2009 5:17:33 PM)
If someone like yourself felt they had to quantify themselves by even bring up anything you did, I would dismiss them and their intentions immediately. If you feel you have to distance yourself from illegal activites like murder or robbery or even consider these to be part of a BDSM environment, I consider you have some serious issues I just wouldn't want to get into. the.dark. Exactly my point, but it does happen, as the boundries of the BDSM environment are always evolving and not set, I hope (I revile stagnation). quote: ORIGINAL: kazzaslave quote: ORIGINAL: subinchico Insane, psychotic, mentally challenged humans could be true "no limits" humans. A sane, mentally intact human that says they are a "no limit" slave/sub are stating a fib, misinformation, etc.. Just wondering who are the psychotic humans or fibbing humans on CM? Hi subinchico, First of all, have we met? chatted? had any contact at all? Because this posting is in response to what kazza wrote and as far as she knows we have never so much as exchanged a single message and so you have no way of knowing what her mental state is. For the record, and if you read her post carefully, she has never said that she doesn't have limits, only that she has never felt the need to discuss them with Master Malkinius because she knows he would never do anything to harm her mentally or psychologically. Please don't make judgements of kazza which have no foundation when you have no idea what she is like and who she is. Thank you for the way you wrote this response and in reflection I must be to literal/objective,,, or being trampled severely by dommes is not BDSM, fetish and I'm just fucked up mentally.

lovingpet -> RE: Hard Limits (5/20/2009 6:23:54 PM)
[/quote] No one will ever define my limits for me. [/quote] I will say that in my experience, it is not that someone else sets their limits upon me (except where I don't have a limit they need in place), but my partner knows me so well that there is no need to keep belaboring the fact. He knows what I can handle and what would crush me. He can choose to crush me, but to what end? Rather, he wishes to preserve me as the creature he has come to cherish and, so, would never do something harmful to me, whether I expressed such concerns directly or not. This kind of relationship takes a lot of time and a great deal of very open, vulnerable conversation from both. It also means proving that my trust is not misplaced time and again. To me, there is something truly beautiful to come to this place with another person. lovingpet

MyLovespet -> RE: Hard Limits (5/20/2009 6:32:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Her1Obsession Dear SilverMoonSlave, You sound a lot like my pet, (MyLovespet) she asked me the same thing and I respect her HARD LIMITS and I will never love her less... She is my world, and I will protect her and love her and see that no harm comes to her, Follow your and trust your Heart SilverMoonSlave ! May you be as loved an cared for as MyLovespet... You are so very sweet My Love. ...As you are my world...

Drakontos -> RE: Hard Limits (5/21/2009 11:23:07 AM)
This is Drakontos. When I am in negotiations with a slave, before she begs my collar; limits, boundaries, won't do's, etc are not discussed. I make it clear, up front, from the first contact; that anyone who becomes involved with me has absolutly no say in what is done, how it is done, where it is done, or why it is done and to what extent. The words can't, won't, shouldn't and wouldn't are not words that I accept as part of my relationships. That aside; I am also one who, if I say from the beginning that a slave will not be doing something; I do not go back on my word to her. The reason for this that I am aware that forcing the issue would in fact damage the property; which is not my intention. I have had slaves make a request that something be changed, done differently, or not done at all; and this I don't mind, as long as they are honest as to the reasons behind the request. It does not mean that I will grant the request; but I do take the time to review and make a decision that I feel is in her/their/our best interest and in the best interest of the relationship.

leadership527 -> RE: Hard Limits (5/21/2009 11:50:27 AM)
~FAST REPLY TO ALL~ In the past I've offered up this answre to the whole 'no limits' thing. Maybe this'll sit right for some of you. In my opinion, the vast majority of the limits/nolimits debates have nothing to do with any disagreement at all. It has to do with terminology and mental outlook. Let's divide the world into the poets and the engineers. The poets will say things like, "I am a no limits slave" because it is true in their reality. Contained within that statement are a bunch of assumptions like, 'we are not discussing mental illness, horror movies, or any other related crap'. They are extolling the virtues of their choices as poets are wont to do and really, who runs around saying poets are all liars because they say things like, "You shine brighter than the sun." or "Your eyes are the windows to my world." Neither is factually true. Then, of course, we have the engineer types (myself among them), who are looking at an entirely different world view. To us, absolutes are... well.. absolute. When we say absolute zero we mean that temperature beyond which it is not possible to be colder. It is absolute. There are no exclusions or caveats. If we later find out it really was possible to get colder than that, we'd change the definition, not run around insisting that the old temperate was still absolute zero. So when we say 'no limits' we mean literally there is no limit to what this person would do. To us, that is a meaningful distinction and the fact that it is not to the poets doesn't make us either stupid or unable to imagine the wonders that is TPE. Yup, as an engineer, I don't acknowledge any no-limits slaves in my engineering definition of what no-limits means. And here's a big surprise... all the poet types tend to agree with me when put that way. But when I equate 'no limits' to any of the other statements I routinely make and accept within my marriage, then I'm perfectly fine with the phrase and, in fact, would say Carol qualifies. "Carol has no limits which are relevant within our relationship" How's that?

Drakontos -> RE: Hard Limits (5/22/2009 5:37:29 AM)
grins zaphira told Master once that she had a hard limit of listing hard limits

leadership527 -> RE: Hard Limits (5/22/2009 8:43:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Drakontos grins zaphira told Master once that she had a hard limit of listing hard limits laughs How did he describe you again? Cheeky? laughs more Three cheers for irreverant slave girls!

Aileen1968 -> RE: Hard Limits (5/22/2009 8:55:04 AM)
Meat hooks have become a hard limit. [:)] Whether or not he choses to do anything is always up to him. It's always his choice and I always have the ability to express my opinion. He may or may not take that into consideration. He has told me that I will never be harmed and that I will always be healthy mentally and physically to take care of my kids. He's proven countless times that he is in control of himself and that he is rational. We both like going to the edge and to do that we have to trust each other and tread on those limits.

Drakontos -> RE: Hard Limits (5/22/2009 8:58:56 AM)
quote: Meat hooks have become a hard limit. zaphira is trying to picture herself hanging from the wall or ceiling with two meat hooks stuck in each shoulder. This slave thinks that the blood would be a deterent to Master;it is so hard to scrub out of wood and plaster; so perhaps she is safe. grins

SlyStone -> RE: Hard Limits (5/22/2009 7:07:55 PM)
quote: I am a no limits slave. I'm not fibbing, i'm not giving misinformation. I take on the limits of my Sir, they are not my limits, they are his. You are forgetting about the most important limit of all, the one that is never mentioned when discussing limits, and that is your freedom to stay or go. Unless you relinquish that, give up that basic human right, your no-limit declaration is nothing more than an idealistic statement of intent, rather than a stone cold situational reality.

mindtrap -> RE: Hard Limits (5/23/2009 4:49:08 AM)
quote: He has told me that I will never be harmed and that I will always be healthy mentally and physically to take care of my kids. He's proven countless times that he is in control of himself and that he is rational. We both like going to the edge and to do that we have to trust each other and tread on those limits. Being that there are kids involved, your mental and physical health will be reflected to them. So, i assume you are not the only one who has to trust him. The father of those kids has to also. Whatever affects you, affects your family unit. So the person who really needs to be trusted is you. Trust is a fragile thing, it takes time to earn it, and can be lost in a second. So, what could affect the children, is the hard limit. I hope that limit never gets tested, as should you both

subinchico -> RE: Hard Limits (5/25/2009 1:39:16 AM)
Thank you leadership527! Very understandable explaination/understanding of thoughts in us! quote: ORIGINAL: leadership527 ~FAST REPLY TO ALL~ In the past I've offered up this answre to the whole 'no limits' thing. Maybe this'll sit right for some of you. In my opinion, the vast majority of the limits/nolimits debates have nothing to do with any disagreement at all. It has to do with terminology and mental outlook. Let's divide the world into the poets and the engineers. The poets will say things like, "I am a no limits slave" because it is true in their reality. Contained within that statement are a bunch of assumptions like, 'we are not discussing mental illness, horror movies, or any other related crap'. They are extolling the virtues of their choices as poets are wont to do and really, who runs around saying poets are all liars because they say things like, "You shine brighter than the sun." or "Your eyes are the windows to my world." Neither is factually true. Then, of course, we have the engineer types (myself among them), who are looking at an entirely different world view. To us, absolutes are... well.. absolute. When we say absolute zero we mean that temperature beyond which it is not possible to be colder. It is absolute. There are no exclusions or caveats. If we later find out it really was possible to get colder than that, we'd change the definition, not run around insisting that the old temperate was still absolute zero. So when we say 'no limits' we mean literally there is no limit to what this person would do. To us, that is a meaningful distinction and the fact that it is not to the poets doesn't make us either stupid or unable to imagine the wonders that is TPE. Yup, as an engineer, I don't acknowledge any no-limits slaves in my engineering definition of what no-limits means. And here's a big surprise... all the poet types tend to agree with me when put that way. But when I equate 'no limits' to any of the other statements I routinely make and accept within my marriage, then I'm perfectly fine with the phrase and, in fact, would say Carol qualifies. "Carol has no limits which are relevant within our relationship" How's that?

subinchico -> RE: Hard Limits (5/25/2009 1:44:14 AM)
Thank you SlyStone for using the words perfectly showing my intent for posting. quote: ORIGINAL: SlyStone quote: I am a no limits slave. I'm not fibbing, i'm not giving misinformation. I take on the limits of my Sir, they are not my limits, they are his. You are forgetting about the most important limit of all, the one that is never mentioned when discussing limits, and that is your freedom to stay or go. Unless you relinquish that, give up that basic human right, your no-limit declaration is nothing more than an idealistic statement of intent, rather than a stone cold situational reality.

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