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RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/10/2006 1:17:07 AM   
Real0ne


Posts: 21189
Joined: 10/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion
I would take an unopened/unanswered email as a sign that there was no interest. Sure it is a pain in the ass to type out a lengthy email & have it unopened or unanswered, but such is life. Anything worth having is worth putting forth an effort to obtain. Anything easily obtained is often unappreciated.


Sure i would take it that way too if it went in their mail box! Point is that it goes into their bulk mail and bulk mail to most people is the garbage. you may be one of a very few who ever look in there much less actually read any of them.

i hope you are not trying to say lets make this really difficult so the writers of emails appreciate it. i think finding someone online is difficult enough without adding

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
It's no one else's business what my mail settings are.

It's not my job to make it easy for you. It's not your business to know what mail I like unless I choose to make it so.


So you tell us about your boyfriend, your ba, and your 2 other partners, that you are one of the organizers of a bdsm group, that you want to be spoiled and you like sincerity, smart people with high drive, geeks, then you go on to tell us about a few of your kinks and dislikes, and finally a big ole long list of interests, virtually everthing but your phone number.

and after telling us alllllllll this info about you, you feel you that the age range you seek, and in or out of state etc should all be private?

i find this amazing, if not shocking!

Whats wrong with this picture?

quote:

ORIGINAL: IceyOne

quote:

Here is my case and i feel that mail control settings of each persons profile should be displayed on that profile to the people who view it so we can see if we are within their parameters of acceptable mail.


I have to ask why? If you read a persons profile, and pay attention to what it is that they have written...that alone should tell you if you are within their parameters of acceptable mail. Sounds more like you are just too lazy to read the profile.


That seems to be an ongoing misconception in this thread.
i read every profile, sometimes 3 times if it is long, sometimes i go as far as to parse it all out in the notepad so i can better conceptualize exactly what this person wants if it is many many details.

The reason why is again as i stated above that i have written many profiles that according to the PROFILE i am 100% compatible. However according to the mail controls i get dumped in the trash of no fault or negligence of my own!

i get dumped in the trash due the persons negligence who wrote the profile when they omitted some of the things they are looking for!

quote:

ORIGINAL: IceyOne
quote:

Many dommes on here have their mail controls set and do not indicate what those controls are set at in their profile.


And why should this be a problem for you? What business is it of yours how someone sets their email settings?

well if i am to spend my time writing to a profile i think that makes it my busness dont you?

quote:

ORIGINAL: IceyOne
quote:

NO one responds to one liners so you are forced to write many sentences and that takes your time.


Are you illiterate? Incapable of writing something intelligent? Dyslexic (sp) ?

it seems you are the one who missed the point here!

quote:

ORIGINAL: IceyOne

Sounds to me that you are just too lazy to want to take the time to read the profiles and find the answers that you are looking for. It also sounds to me that you obviously think your time here is a waste. And yet. You still remain?


Again; you see that is NOT the case, infact it is exactly the opposite! i DO read the profiles, as i said above. if i can see that i am NOT what the person is looking for I DO NOT WRITE TO THEM!!!! does that help?

When the mail controls are not displayed i write to them anyway because i cannot read their mind! only to discover it went in the trash of NO fault of my own!




quote:

ORIGINAL: siamsa24
What I am trying to say is why clutter up the profile with yet another thing that will be ignored?

I suppose one or two people would read it, but it wouldn't change 90% of the email that most people recieve.


If you want 20-30 age range great! Then it is automatically put on yout profile for you and you do not even have to type it!

If you want only local then that also is automatically put on your profile you.

i do not write very many profiles any more due to this problem. i only write profiles that are local that specify age or distant that specify both age and distance, because those would be the 2 most likely to get an email trashed.

Unfortunately not writing is the only way to work around this problem that the guys have availiable to them on here.

i and many others are very seriously seeking a partner and i DO read the profiles and if i see anything in there that appears to be incompatible i DO NOT waste my time writing to the person.

The beauty of displaying it on the profile is that it changes nothing for you what so ever, in fact it actually saves people the writing they should be doing anyway, prevents those who read profiles from being punished without reason and will continue to trashes the people who truly DESERVE to have their emails trashed by the system. (thats the ones who do not read)

The only people who deserve it are the ones who do not read your profile and i agree with that 100% TRASH THEM!!!! Not us, the people who do take the time to read and properly determine if its a fit based on the words you wrote in your profile.

The way the system is now we are being punished just for writing at all, even if we are a perfect match, and the joke is that the serious ones are getting punished for what the bad ones are doing.

i and many others out here DO READ profiles and do my best to determine compatiblility before writing and these are the guys this change will help.





_____________________________

"We the Borg" of the us imperialists....resistance is futile

Democracy; The 'People' voted on 'which' amendment?

Yesterdays tinfoil is today's reality!

"No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

(in reply to siamsa24)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/10/2006 1:19:25 AM   
Real0ne


Posts: 21189
Joined: 10/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse
I don't use the scattergun approach (aim at everything and see what you hit) those very few I have sent out are ones where according to their profile we are looking for compatable things. If I knew my mail was bulkmailed then at least I'd know that we weren't as compatable as the profile seemed to indicate.

That lil' bit of info wouldn't make any diffrence to the recipient, wouldn't make much diffrence to the muppets who don't read anything, but it would make it a bit easier on those of us with a brain who are seriously trying to find someone compatable.


Exactly!!!!

quote:

ORIGINAL: OscarHargraves

I agree with you here. It IS frustrating and there is no sense in it.

I also disagree with LuckyA on this one. People who post a profile and want to be contacted SHOULD make it easy for someone to contact them. This isn't supposed to be a game of 'Guess How to Reach Me'.

Maybe to start with we could get the nice folks at CM to allow each person the OPTION to make their mail control settings public or private? Then post them on that person's profile or just say 'private'.


i snipped where you talked about it but mail controls were not put in here for us guys. we dont get 100 emails a day. It was put in here due to the frustrations women are and continue to have with so many people who simply send form letters out or just look at a pic and write, or the one liners and list of trash writers go on and on.

Those people should be trashed we all agree! no one needs that.

But the problem is often that it does not even occur to these woman to put in their profile what they are seeking that include the things listed in the mail controls.

i agree of course that this should not be a guessing game out here.


quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy


What's funny is how the "email issues" are completely different for each sex. For instance, no guy has to worry about setting his "mail controls" correctly, he just has to worry about if he'll get any mail at all!!!


Very true. The women had problems with all the garbage mail and cm made mail controls to help that. The only problem is it created another problem for the guys who are sincerely looking and writing mails that go into the garbage no fault of their own. i would think displaying this would at least let us guys know if we are compatible with age and distance as well. i dont see what the big secret is?








< Message edited by Real0ne -- 2/10/2006 1:31:17 AM >

_____________________________

"We the Borg" of the us imperialists....resistance is futile

Democracy; The 'People' voted on 'which' amendment?

Yesterdays tinfoil is today's reality!

"No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/10/2006 7:05:48 AM   
MsSonnetMarwood


Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline 		Was anyone NOT aware that there were mail filters?


_____________________________

~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/10/2006 6:59:03 PM   
Real0ne


Posts: 21189
Joined: 10/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: perverseangelic

I may have missed this point, as I only skimmed the thread, but here's my thought.

I would put MONEY on the fact that if our mail filter settings were made public many of us (dominant women, especially, I think) would be further flooded by mail asking "why!!??!?!" as in "why do you have those settings?!"

I think that people are more likely to, rather than just move on past a profile that has settings that don't match them, take the time to write to that individual either to complain of their bias in having those settings, or to tell them why the writer should be considered anyway.

Not everyone, of course, but look at how many threads are started here about individuals who state various preferences in their profiles.

I just don't think this would -solve- any problems and might add more.

quote:

n


There is no argument against people having preferences! and those people who post crying about someone elses preferences do come under the header whining. That is rediculous frankly.

What i posted here is a legitimate argument!

Your suggestion that people will purposely write as a result of you listing your age and distance preferencee or no profile and whatever else is on there, on the surface seems plausable, but when giving it more than a seconds thought the real answer is "so what"?????

Let them write to you, let them write reems to you!!! All those reems of messages will go right into the garbage can thanks to your mail filter settings and you will not even see one of them!

The only reason they would write to you is if they were out of your range settings in your mail controls and your mail controls would trash them and you would never see it, the people who are within your range settings could care less and would never write to you to complain about your choice that would include them.

So no skin off your back what so ever either way!!!

That and if they are that dumb to bitch about your gawd given right to preference then it would in short order teach these bozo's that its worthless to do such things and they will stop!

Oh yes and i want to add, if everyone out here including the responders have their mail settings displayed what sense does it make for them to write everyone complaining about when it is the norm? They would have one hell of a lot of writing to do i think.

Granted you will get one here and there out of hundreds of emails but when it is the norm its unlikely it would be any more than you get now. and at least it does not waste the time of legitimate writers or responders.


quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse
At last, Thanks PA that at least is a reasonable argument against the idea rather than just a kneejerk reaction like has been seen so far. It is certainly something I hadn't considered (Probably because I am not prone to that particular brand of stupidity myself).


Sounds good on the surface but is totally irrelevant when it comes right down to it.



quote:

ORIGINAL: ModeratorThree

And what should we do with the people that when they get an email, they search the senders profile before opening it? Many have said they do just this, and if they are not compatable they delete the message.

Should CM.com then have the mods or admins email them or call them to ask why?

Mod3


Actually that too is quite simple to resolve. i can only suggest following what other "free" sites have done. that is to display that the persons profile has been veiwed by the recipient.

This is really yet another form of abuse by the recipient. if they fear hearing from the person again then they can block them rather than being sneaky pete about it!

at least the respondant knows that the person has seen his profile and he can see that the woman was not interested and move on.

Other wise the majority of them are just going in the garbage certainly not of any concern from most females on here.

i do have fem dom friends who are listed on here that i talk with about all sorts of things this subject being one of those things, and they do tell me about the their garbage cans otherwise known as bulk mail.

i tend to write one person at a time. what incentive is there to do that when they never even see my letter?

i am not saying bulk mail should not be. it is necesary. i am saying it is incomplete and only works for one gender.





< Message edited by Real0ne -- 2/10/2006 7:41:33 PM >

_____________________________

"We the Borg" of the us imperialists....resistance is futile

Democracy; The 'People' voted on 'which' amendment?

Yesterdays tinfoil is today's reality!

"No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/10/2006 9:03:02 PM   
Real0ne


Posts: 21189
Joined: 10/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold

READ THE PROFILES!
Now we have to deal with complaints that email filters should be made public.
As already stated, I use these filters. I also check My bulk mailbox daily.
I am not seeking a Dominant male. I am not seeking a femsub. I am not seeking boys from overseas. I state I do not chat. I state I do not do online. I state I do not do cam.
I state what is reasonable, and with great detail in My profile when I am actively seeking. IT DOESN'T MATTER!
I state I will not respond to one liners. I state I have an extreme distaste for fetish driven user names (i.e. licku4hrs, cbtslut, et al.) I state I seek TPE and even define it for the boy who might be reading. I state the boy must be relocatable. I state I seek a slave, and even share My definition of "slave". IT DOESN'T MATTER!
Look at My age. I am done having children. Mine are all grown. What possible interest might I have in a 19 year old boy in India? Or a 22 year old boy in Iowa who is still a full time student? Most of the time they are just trying to wiggle their way into some cyber-domination when they are bored on a Friday night.
I look at every profile unless the one liner is "u r hot" or "do u do cam? or "send more pics". I also state I do not send more pics.
I can't tell you how many profiles only have one or two lines, or are completley blank. And very rarely a photo.
Filters have a purpose. My time is just as valuable as their time.
But this line takes the cake for Me:


No need to get defensive here dusty. It goes without saying then that we are not talking about you. Few people do everything you have done in your profile and subs should tip their hat to you for doing so.

This is NOT about getting rid of mail controls. This is about a more reasonable approach to them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: TPEMASTER4YOU
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold
quote:

ORIGINAL: Real0ne

NO one responds to one liners so you are forced to write many sentences and that takes your time.


Poor baby! I am sorry you feel forced to put any effort forth at all, dear.
Thanks for the laugh.



To bad you like to knock people . As a dom I usuall, don't knock others or flame them. I use conctructive criticism and try to help them . I see you have very little understanding of what some of us are having difficulty in getting emails. Don't think your all God because your not . I posted for advice not to be ridiculed.


Geez dusty i dont know why you attacked this guy, shouldnt you be attacking me? i am the one who started this thread.

Again no one is saying mail controls should be done away with. they should be modified to be friendsly to both sexes thats all.




quote:

ORIGINAL: ModeratorThree

Sometimes I wonder if the reason emails are tossed is because a great majority of our members do at least read the forums.

1) Get the email
2) Look up profile to determine if worth opening
3) Click on forum posts
4) Delete email

Something to think about.

Mod3


sure i would bet that does happen occasionally. but now lets look at the percentages to find very few ever looked at the forum and could care less about us bantering fools on here. i think this is digging pretty deep into the exception zone!



quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
quote:

ORIGINAL: TPEMASTER4YOU
To bad you like to knock people . As a dom I usuall, don't knock others or flame them. I use conctructive criticism and try to help them . I see you have very little understanding of what some of us are having difficulty in getting emails. Don't think your all God because your not . I posted for advice not to be ridiculed.

Advice:
Don't complain about people not responding to your emails.

Don't complain about how hard it is unless you're at a bar with your best bud and are at least half drunk.

Do spellcheck, the better you read, the more attractive you are.


translation: If you dont like it just shut up and go away. If status quo is good enough for me it should be good enough for you too!! chances are the mail controls were put in there in the first place as a result of whiny women complaining about getting so many junk emails, but thats different, that us gurls, and this is you guys so it does not matter. you WHINER!

you continue to shock me with your responses LA!

quote:

ORIGINAL: ModeratorThree

Well you see, once the email is opened, there you (generic you) sit waiting for a reply. And many will send yet another email wanting to know why did you not reply. It is sometimes easier to go the long route and be finished. Personally if it were me and I had the luxury of blocking members, I would block before delete, this way I am sure it's over.

HTH

Mod3


whats the difference?

Sitting there waiting for a reply that is as simple as pressing the thanks but no thanks button, then the responder looks at the persons profile to see they have been online every day for 2 weeks and are simply ignoring them? or what most likely really happening is their email went into the garbage bin because they had no idea they were 1 year to young or old since the profile owner did not bother to list that on their profile.

So then they write back saying why did you ignore me, whats the difference here?

Blocking, yeh in this particular set of circumstances that is right up there there with a couple more really cool things that have been invented for the irresposible, like caller id, and answering machines. the irresponsible nonconfrontationalists dream come tru.

People who handle this like dusty does are the exception to the rule! Rare ones at that. i would expect that you would have more people that frequent the forums checking the garbage bin than the general population that do not read about all the issues.

quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear
I agree. Privacy is privacy even if it does mean that it's a little more difficult to contact someone. I can understand the frustration for those who post a profile with the active expectation of meeting possible partners, and were it not for the bloody great duck pond between Aussie and the US, I'd be doing that for the same reason. However seeing that the odds of my finding a slave on CM is remote to say the least, I prefer my settings to remain private.. It doesn't stop some truely wonderfull people getting in contact with me as it is and some wonderfull friendships forming, albeit cyber ones for the moment.


Exactly what are you calling private?

The only things on the mail control are:
1) age range
2) no profile
3) local
4) gender
5) couples

You stated on your profile that you want submissive women and you stated on your profile that you want couples.

Well that covers numbers 4 and 5 in the mail controls for sure!

So you are willing to list certain items of the mail controls to make public and that is ok, but the other items listed on the mail control, well those are all private? come iron bear whats up with that?

You also have a long list of preferences on your profile and none of that is private. You listed many interests from everything you live for to everything you hate and everything inbetween.

you list what you hate but dont say no men, or wont answer adds with no profile, or no out of state or territory what ever it is you have there.

Are you sure you are talking about privacy issues here or are we really talking about nothing more than preferences?

i have talked about a bonafide privacy issue in another thread and it is quite different than a personal choice or a personal preference.

i would like to know what you feel is private about 1,2, and 3 and why 4 and 5 are not?










_____________________________

"We the Borg" of the us imperialists....resistance is futile

Democracy; The 'People' voted on 'which' amendment?

Yesterdays tinfoil is today's reality!

"No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

(in reply to ModeratorThree)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/10/2006 9:10:47 PM   
Real0ne


Posts: 21189
Joined: 10/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSonnetMarwood

Was anyone NOT aware that there were mail filters?


i think some of us are painfully aware of them LOL

there i think i am caught up now.

_____________________________

"We the Borg" of the us imperialists....resistance is futile

Democracy; The 'People' voted on 'which' amendment?

Yesterdays tinfoil is today's reality!

"No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/10/2006 10:40:01 PM   
kc692


Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Real0ne

i posted this in another thread and a moderator felt that a persons mail control settings should remain private. i cant see any reason why they would want to do that.

Here is my case and i feel that mail control settings of each persons profile should be displayed on that profile to the people who view it so we can see if we are within their parameters of acceptable mail.

i would very much like to hear opinions from everyone if this should continue to be kept private or made public.

i cant imagine why anyone would want to keep such a thing secret and it would save countless hours of writers time.

problem is a 50year woman sets her mail controls for the ages of 20 - 30, because she is looking for a young guy but fails to mention it on her profile.

Now an unsuspecting person comes along to write this profile thinking he is 45, and with no ages listed on the profile has no reason NOT to write to this person, so he writes to the profile.

2 months later looks into his sent mail to discover it was never read because it went to the garbage can of the person he wrote to.

Many dommes on here have their mail controls set and do not indicate what those controls are set at in their profile.

NO one responds to one liners so you are forced to write many sentences and that takes your time.

i am not a mind reader and i doubt you are either, and if it is not listed on the profile there is NO way to know until weeks or months later and you see that you wrote a perfectly legitimate email that was never even opened or read because it went straight into the garbage, NO fault of your own!!

my suggestion which has gone unheeded since i have been on here is to show what the mail controls are set at on thier profile so i can see it when i bring it up so if i am not with in age distance or whatever other settings are on there i can save my time and NOT write to them.

Because i am not a mind reader, i have written countless letters that went into the garbage that is nicely named bulk mail that no one looks at, so its the garbage bin regardless of the cute name and originally well intended purpose and as a result is a huge waste of time and resources.

i doubt many people on here aware this is the case and why some or many of their emails are not even being opened! Emails that you never would have written if the control settings were displayed on each profile.




Strange for one that complains so much that on the personals, yours says profile not found, so noone could mail you or see any info about you at all.......

(in reply to Real0ne)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/10/2006 10:59:25 PM   
kc692


Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Real0ne


quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse
I don't use the scattergun approach (aim at everything and see what you hit) those very few I have sent out are ones where according to their profile we are looking for compatable things. If I knew my mail was bulkmailed then at least I'd know that we weren't as compatable as the profile seemed to indicate.

That lil' bit of info wouldn't make any diffrence to the recipient, wouldn't make much diffrence to the muppets who don't read anything, but it would make it a bit easier on those of us with a brain who are seriously trying to find someone compatable.


Exactly!!!!

quote:

ORIGINAL: OscarHargraves

I agree with you here. It IS frustrating and there is no sense in it.

I also disagree with LuckyA on this one. People who post a profile and want to be contacted SHOULD make it easy for someone to contact them. This isn't supposed to be a game of 'Guess How to Reach Me'.

Maybe to start with we could get the nice folks at CM to allow each person the OPTION to make their mail control settings public or private? Then post them on that person's profile or just say 'private'.


i snipped where you talked about it but mail controls were not put in here for us guys. we dont get 100 emails a day. It was put in here due to the frustrations women are and continue to have with so many people who simply send form letters out or just look at a pic and write, or the one liners and list of trash writers go on and on.

Those people should be trashed we all agree! no one needs that.

But the problem is often that it does not even occur to these woman to put in their profile what they are seeking that include the things listed in the mail controls.

i agree of course that this should not be a guessing game out here.


quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy


What's funny is how the "email issues" are completely different for each sex. For instance, no guy has to worry about setting his "mail controls" correctly, he just has to worry about if he'll get any mail at all!!!


Very true. The women had problems with all the garbage mail and cm made mail controls to help that. The only problem is it created another problem for the guys who are sincerely looking and writing mails that go into the garbage no fault of their own. i would think displaying this would at least let us guys know if we are compatible with age and distance as well. i dont see what the big secret is?









I think it's safe to say you are whittling your list a little, because hopefully you know, even without knowing the mail filters of the particular women involved, if you were to write to one that has posted on or read at least the last few threads you have been on, it is safe to say you would be wasting your time......did that help you at all in saving your valuable time, smiles??????

(in reply to Real0ne)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/10/2006 11:38:48 PM   
Real0ne


Posts: 21189
Joined: 10/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kc692
I think it's safe to say you are whittling your list a little, because hopefully you know, even without knowing the mail filters of the particular women involved, if you were to write to one that has posted on or read at least the last few threads you have been on, it is safe to say you would be wasting your time......did that help you at all in saving your valuable time, smiles??????


well like most candidates that are in office. you can figure typically 50% of the population do not like them. Why would i think i am so special that i can do better. i franly do not know anyone with the back bone to stand for something who is loved by everyone. but then i think on the bright side. She who gets me knows where i stand and what i stand for, and does not have to worry about little nasties going on behind her back because i told her what she wants to hear rather than what is in my mind and heart like so many do today. i dont do revolving door, at least not if it can be prevented. This is a place to debate and when i debate i do not suck up like so many do on here. i say my piece right or wrong, and thats it.

_____________________________

"We the Borg" of the us imperialists....resistance is futile

Democracy; The 'People' voted on 'which' amendment?

Yesterdays tinfoil is today's reality!

"No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

(in reply to kc692)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/13/2006 9:32:03 AM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		All very interesting and telling arguements, however, not one of them addresses the main point...it's none of your damned business how, or if, I filter my mail.
Nobody on CM is in any way obliged to read and/or respond to any mail...just as you are not required to do so on your hotmail or yahoo addresses.

You worry that your precious email might be going into the junk mail folder despite the fact that the profile indicates you are a match...tough...cry me a river.

You have no right to have your emails read
You have no right to have your emails replied to
and
You have no right to know how anybody chooses to filter their email.


_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to Real0ne)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/13/2006 11:13:36 AM   
GoddessDustyGold


Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Real0ne


quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold

READ THE PROFILES!
Now we have to deal with complaints that email filters should be made public.
As already stated, I use these filters. I also check My bulk mailbox daily.
I am not seeking a Dominant male. I am not seeking a femsub. I am not seeking boys from overseas. I state I do not chat. I state I do not do online. I state I do not do cam.
I state what is reasonable, and with great detail in My profile when I am actively seeking. IT DOESN'T MATTER!
I state I will not respond to one liners. I state I have an extreme distaste for fetish driven user names (i.e. licku4hrs, cbtslut, et al.) I state I seek TPE and even define it for the boy who might be reading. I state the boy must be relocatable. I state I seek a slave, and even share My definition of "slave". IT DOESN'T MATTER!
Look at My age. I am done having children. Mine are all grown. What possible interest might I have in a 19 year old boy in India? Or a 22 year old boy in Iowa who is still a full time student? Most of the time they are just trying to wiggle their way into some cyber-domination when they are bored on a Friday night.
I look at every profile unless the one liner is "u r hot" or "do u do cam? or "send more pics". I also state I do not send more pics.
I can't tell you how many profiles only have one or two lines, or are completley blank. And very rarely a photo.
Filters have a purpose. My time is just as valuable as their time.
But this line takes the cake for Me:


No need to get defensive here dusty. It goes without saying then that we are not talking about you. Few people do everything you have done in your profile and subs should tip their hat to you for doing so.

This is NOT about getting rid of mail controls. This is about a more reasonable approach to them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: TPEMASTER4YOU
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold
quote:

ORIGINAL: Real0ne

NO one responds to one liners so you are forced to write many sentences and that takes your time.


Poor baby! I am sorry you feel forced to put any effort forth at all, dear.
Thanks for the laugh.



To bad you like to knock people . As a dom I usuall, don't knock others or flame them. I use conctructive criticism and try to help them . I see you have very little understanding of what some of us are having difficulty in getting emails. Don't think your all God because your not . I posted for advice not to be ridiculed.


quote:

Geez dusty i dont know why you attacked this guy, shouldnt you be attacking me? i am the one who started this thread.

Again no one is saying mail controls should be done away with. they should be modified to be friendsly to both sexes thats all.



*Takes a deep breath...let's out a huge sigh*

I have to admit that, at times, My patience wears thin.
Please refer to My original post. For your convenience, it is post#37.
The only reason I quoted this response to Me, in it's entirety is to indicate clearly that I was responding to your orginal post. In fact, it says (in response to RealOne).
How TPEMaster got the impression I was addressing him, I have no idea. OMG...Are you TPEMaster? (That just occured to Me, folks!) Well, if you are, then you would be aware that I already emailed that gentleman to let him know I was not referring to anything he had written. And I have had a reply from him apologizing for making the error and realizing that I am not this horrible person.
I was posting to RealOne. The quotes are clearly from that original post. I didn't "attack" TPEMaster. In fact, I didn't intend to attack you. But I was impatient with the tone of the complaint, and I am sure that showed. I am still wondering how TPEMaster thought I was addressing him, since, to the best of My knowledge, that is the one and only post he had made to this thread. I am also wondering why you immediately jump on the bandwagon by defending him, when it should have been obvious to you that he made an error and got his feelings hurt about something that didn't even involve him.
Now, who decides how to make the email filters more friendly to both sexes? I had no idea that the email filters were gender biased. I am pretty sure that you have just as much right to filter your mail, and choose to read or delete anything that might get into your bulk mail folder. I also know that females are not the only ones who can use a block or delete key.
I read this basic complaint (yes, it is not a discussion, it is a complaining rant) as "Make it easier for me." I have made it as easy on Myself as possible. I don't read profiles at all, except for those of regular posters on these forums, those who email Me, and those who show up on My Admirer's list. That is My privilege.
I do have a right to privacy in My filters. I am not sure how many Dominas you have spoken to who claim they treat this box and pure junk and automatically delete that mail. Most of the ones I know check and read mail in their bulk folders. It isn't deemed spam. God knows,I get enough of that in My regular box. Yes, I am talking about mail I would normally consider spam if it came to My regular email address. I use the filters and the bulk mail box for convenience. If I am busy I might not get to that mail for an extra day or two. But most of the time I check that box daily. I would rather keep up than be overwhelmed after several days. It usually doesn't take that long, because most of it is one liners from young boys in foreign countries or silly mail asking for cyber domination or offering to peform for Me on web cam. Their age and inexperience, as well as their over-driven libidos clearly come to the fore. But I do read it. And I have had some delightful correspondences with Male Dominants, female submissives (most of whom I know from these boards), and even some younger (and much older) male subs who would not fall into My preferred parameters, because I am not so set in stone that I would discount the possibility. I simply consider it less urgent, and it helps Me to manage My mail. That doesn't mean I don't get the same one liners, requests for cam, phone numbers, and "i want to srv u" in My regular box. It just means they are identifying as a male submissive or slave who falls into My general (privately known) age parameters and they live in the United States. Big deal!
Now I am absolutely SURE that you can do the exact same thing. Would that we could have a filter to stop email that is not a certain number of characters long. But then I am sure there would be boys who would figure out a way to increase the keystrokes without writing anything substantial.
Loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooookn' Goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood' MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
I do not believe I am the rarity. I just think that some people would prefer to believe that, because it makes it easier to justify why they can't get along with people and it gives them something new to complain about.
Since you don't have a profile, would you mind at least letting us know how you identify? I ask because your posts read like a "poor me" submissive boy, but your attitude is that of an newbie MaleDom who uses arrogance to cover up his insecurities. (Yes, that was snide!)
*Passes RealOne the brie. He already has plenty of whine.*

< Message edited by GoddessDustyGold -- 2/13/2006 11:35:53 AM >

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom


(in reply to Real0ne)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/13/2006 11:21:10 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

Blocking, yeh in this particular set of circumstances that is right up there there with a couple more really cool things that have been invented for the irresposible,


Why is blocking someone that you have no wish to communicate with irresponsible?

Celeste

< Message edited by BitaTruble -- 2/13/2006 11:22:24 AM >

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to Real0ne)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/13/2006 11:29:55 AM   
ModeratorEleven


Posts: 2007
Joined: 8/14/2005
Status: offline 		It's not.

XI

_____________________________

This mod goes to eleven.

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/13/2006 12:21:34 PM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

quote:

Blocking, yeh in this particular set of circumstances that is right up there there with a couple more really cool things that have been invented for the irresposible,


Why is blocking someone that you have no wish to communicate with irresponsible?

Celeste



Its only irresponsible because someone didn't get their way---smiles love your posts BitaTruble--

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/14/2006 1:53:53 AM   
Real0ne


Posts: 21189
Joined: 10/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

quote:

Blocking, yeh in this particular set of circumstances that is right up there there with a couple more really cool things that have been invented for the irresposible,


Why is blocking someone that you have no wish to communicate with irresponsible?

Celeste


quote:

ORIGINAL: ModeratorEleven

It's not.

XI


yeh thanks for bringing that to my attention. Scratch that from my post as that is not the point and i really do not want to bring off point garbage into this.

_____________________________

"We the Borg" of the us imperialists....resistance is futile

Democracy; The 'People' voted on 'which' amendment?

Yesterdays tinfoil is today's reality!

"No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/14/2006 2:42:01 AM   
Real0ne


Posts: 21189
Joined: 10/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

All very interesting and telling arguements, however, not one of them addresses the main point...it's none of your damned business how, or if, I filter my mail.
Nobody on CM is in any way obliged to read and/or respond to any mail...just as you are not required to do so on your hotmail or yahoo addresses.

You worry that your precious email might be going into the junk mail folder despite the fact that the profile indicates you are a match...tough...cry me a river.

You have no right to have your emails read
You have no right to have your emails replied to and
You have no right to know how anybody chooses to filter their email.


pref·er·ence (prfr-ns, prfrns) KEY

NOUN:

1 The selecting of someone or something over another or others.
a The right or chance to so choose.
b Someone or something so chosen.

2 The state of being preferred.

All interests or lack there of are preferences!


you did a wonderful job taking this subject from apples to oranges. i never said anything about rights!

Frankly i am surprised how far you missed the point here, like we are on different planets.

If you had your real phone, address and credit card numbers listed in those mail settings i can certainly understand and agree with you if you wanted all that to be private. In fact i think that would be essential to your welfare to keep those kinds of things private and i expect you would agree with me on that.

NOTE: NONE of the above listed items are "preferences", i think we can agree on that also.

On the other hand getting back to the point of my post, like iron bear however, you list that you want females.

Like it or not that "IS" a "preference".

age range, distance, like it or not they also "ARE" a "PREFERENCE" and since they too are "PREFERENCES" that certainly does not qualify them to be any more private than your desire for a female, or anything else on your "PREFERRED" interest list!!!!

Hell with this logic make it all private and put "ALL" preferences, re:interests, into the mails controls and really have a party.

Unless of course someone is seeking underage or illegal then i suppose they may want to keep that interest or "PREFERENCE" private too.

If i believed i were being denied my "rights" CM would have already received a letter from my attorney and since they have not i think it is pretty evident that i do not believe or think it is my "right".

Hey and you found your subbie! good for you i am happy for you. Maybe when you were seeking you are unemployed and had nothing to do anyway but write a zillion letters. i have a quite busy life and i do not like my time wasted. If you feel that is all your time is worth hey that is your "RIGHT" and that is great for you. but not for me and not for others.


Nonetheless like all the others so far you failed to make an effective rebuttal.

The point being unlike credit cards and the like, there is absolutely nothing to differentiate the "PREFERENCES" in the mail controls from the existing public preferences listed on the main page and therefore everything related to "PREFERENCES" which would include Actively searching: Mail Controls: Lives For: Loves: Likes: Tolerates: Hates: and the like "ALL" fall into the catagory of "PREFERENCES" including what sex you like to screw and therefore should "ALL" be treated like "PREFERENCES" and "ALL" should either private or public.

Again for those who do not understand: Keep the mail control functionality as it is, just list the "PREFERENCE" settings of them with all the other "preferences" on the main page!

Just telling me its none of my damned business and you dont give a shit is hardly a rebuttal.

If you have a legitimate rebuttal bring it back in context this time man and lets rocknroll.








< Message edited by Real0ne -- 2/14/2006 3:47:21 AM >

_____________________________

"We the Borg" of the us imperialists....resistance is futile

Democracy; The 'People' voted on 'which' amendment?

Yesterdays tinfoil is today's reality!

"No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/14/2006 3:25:38 AM   
seaturtle50


Posts: 382
Joined: 12/28/2005
Status: offline 		RealOne, that waiting for approval thing must be a real drag! i keep trying to read Your posts, but ...

st50

_____________________________

i want to be your ... #1 lowest common denominator.

Destiny happens in a moment ... in the blink of an eye.

(in reply to MHOO314)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/14/2006 5:18:00 AM   
Real0ne


Posts: 21189
Joined: 10/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: seaturtle50

RealOne, that waiting for approval thing must be a real drag! i keep trying to read Your posts, but ...

st50


Well its really no different than before for me on this end, i hit the button and walk away just like i always have. Probly a lot more of a pain in the ass for the readers and those who have to sift thru them, especially when taking into consideration the reason i was put on it in the first place.

_____________________________

"We the Borg" of the us imperialists....resistance is futile

Democracy; The 'People' voted on 'which' amendment?

Yesterdays tinfoil is today's reality!

"No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

(in reply to seaturtle50)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/14/2006 6:32:56 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Real0ne
i find this amazing, if not shocking!

Whats wrong with this picture?

Absolutely nothing.

It's my business what I choose to disclose with who I choose to disclose it with.

I actually am quite a private person. The fact that I share things that most OTHER people consider private leads them to think otherwise. The reality is that they only know what I've shared and there's a lot of layers that I never reveal on public forums.

I choose to give information about myself very consciously. And I want it to remain that way.


_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Real0ne)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Many Emails Never Get Read!!!! Here is why! - 2/14/2006 10:04:02 AM   
RumpusParable


Posts: 1923
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ModeratorThree

Sometimes I wonder if the reason emails are tossed is because a great majority of our members do at least read the forums.

1) Get the email
2) Look up profile to determine if worth opening
3) Click on forum posts
4) Delete email

Something to think about.

Mod3


ditto. as others have said, this gives a much better idea of who this person contacting is. if you only read the email you may respond because they seemed level-headed and otherwise appealing but have totally missed them being rude and/or childish on the boards. better to not waste my own time speaking to someone who is hateful and hiding it.

additionally, i did not know that one could filter like that with the mail controls here; i never messed with them. knowing this now, though, i'm not currently planning on using them to do so but fully agree with the mods on keeping the filters private.

*generic "you"s ahead*

we get thread after thread here about "people aren't reading the mail i sent!!" & "people are reading the mail i sent but not replying!!". if someone doesn't read or respond to you, it simply means they're not interested... it's not confusing or difficult, it's a turn-down. no big deal at all. i've had a number of emails not returned, that means they didn't want to return it. it's that simple.

i have to wonder why others are so emotionally invested in a short note sent to someone they don't know.

also, for a polite 2-3 paragraph introductory note it takes about 3-5 minutes *tops* to type it, depending on how much thought is put into the wording. i can appreciate that if you cannot type it may take a bit longer, but still. if that little time is that valuable to you, then i find it hard to believe the time spent complaining about it on the boards is any less so.... and yet that extra time is spent doing so, showing that -in fact- the person has plenty of time and effort to spend on the internet. either that or they don't have the time, but do have time-management problems which is another thing no one else's fault but their own.

in short, take responsibility for your own actions. we each choose to take the risk of trying to contact someone, online or in the real world. sometimes they bite, sometimes they don't. -but whether and how we take that risk is 100% on us and they are not to blame for our disappointment at their not being interested, which is all they are saying when online they filter, delete or do not respond to us.

< Message edited by RumpusParable -- 2/14/2006 10:30:06 AM >

(in reply to ModeratorThree)
Profile   Post #: 80
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