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RE: Meeting someone offline - 6/22/2009 4:34:07 PM

BossyShoeBitch

Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: EchoMirage

this isnt 1998 anymore. people have been meeting offline for over a decade. anyone with the slightest bit of common sense should know how to handle meeting someone new. what do you do when you meet someone at a bar or club? why do people always treat net meetings as something so dangerous and taboo? its been done millions and millions of times already. but, like airplane crashes, you only hear about the bad ones. what about the thousands of good meeting that happen every day?

how many stories have you heard about girls meeting creeps at bars, clubs, parties, etc, but thats considered normal. yet meeting someone offline is so dangerous and wrong? its shouldnt be treated any differently then going to a party and meeting someone there. its really not a big deal anymore.

You know, I have been wondering the exact same thing myself!

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Post #: 61

RE: Meeting someone offline - 6/22/2009 5:11:53 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Steel, extrapolation from the op's post 51 where she says he has a list of stuff he plans to do to her in the hotel room. Somehow, among this group I doubt it means long sensual massage on a pile of rose petals.

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RE: Meeting someone offline - 6/22/2009 5:15:03 PM

SteelofUtah

Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline

Thank you Des I had missed that.....

Well if he is any good it would consist of that. Sex and Beatings will only get you so far. So Des, is that one of your perfered activities? Is that on your list of things to do with a partner if you were in this kind of situation?

My Point is that we don't know how much info she has on him it was never stated, I am a big fan of trading Info, so even if I don't want someone in my home it does not mean they will not have my address. Some might find that a contradiction in terms but it works for me.

Steel

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Post #: 63

RE: Meeting someone offline - 6/23/2009 7:23:52 AM

xxblushesxx

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Andalusite
...if he doesn't trust you in his home, do you really want to trust him in your pussy?

Quoted for truth...

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Post #: 64

RE: Meeting someone offline - 6/23/2009 5:21:35 PM

Racer_X

Posts: 10
Joined: 4/2/2009
Status: offline

Hey-

I've decided to get more involved with the forums... so here we go...!

And really, I wanted to read ALL the responses to see if this was duplicated.. but there are too many... and really - my answers are the best anyway, so you should here it from me....

There are tons of things that you can do to be safe... I know that probably there are a lot of people here who tell you to avoid situations like this.. but really, I think much of it is overblown... Of course you have to use common sense.. and of course, trust your instincts... but please please please... don't live in a box.

Ah- The suggestions:

1. Have your friend come to the meeting and meet the guy. Get his opinion. Then- someone else has seen his face.

2. Have your friend take a camera pic. Just in case.

3. Have your friend take down the license plate of the car. Just in case. -This is what we used to do in eastern europe when we'd send friends home in gypsy cabs...

5. Tell your friend the hotel/motel you're going to be in...

6. If he's a really good friend, have him wait outside in the parking lot... I'd do that for a friend if she wanted....(and I would allow that to happen if someone met me 'off the cuff')

7. Have periodic phone checkins with him or someone else... Have a safeword. "I'm fine" means not so good... but 'dingleberry' means everything's ok... Even if you're tied up, he can still dial the phone for you and hold the reciever to your face...
7b. HAVE A DIFFERENT SAFEWORD FOR EVERY CHECKIN...... Do like, odd numbered letters... (apple, cantaloupe, eugene...) to remember...

8. Get all the Drivers license info... shit, TAKE the license and give it to your friend...

9. For the freakishly paranoid..: call your friend and leave the phone on and in the room so he can here what's going on...

Anway, things like that should keep you safe. It might not do much should things actually go south- but the idea that he -definitely- will be caught.....

Anyway, hope that helps... let me know how it goes!

Rx

(in reply to kittensslut)

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Post #: 65

RE: Meeting someone offline - 6/23/2009 5:51:00 PM

danielh

Posts: 22
Joined: 3/21/2008
Status: offline

First time poster to the Sub board. This is a fascinating thread, but some of it I'm not getting at all. You're asking a Sub here, so I'll answer.

Meet a self described Dominant male on line, agree to meet publicly and then immediately go private... to be bound by a dominant person you don't know at all? Skip the online, that's good for some feel... but that's only potential reality. You don't know him at all. Not even.

Even if you're submissive, you come in with high worth. Doesn't mean someone else feels that way, but if they don't, why go there? Make him show his colors. If he wants you, he'll work for your trust... you're worth it. From then on, well, that's different.

You're asking this question, so you're already thinking about it. And if your spirit really moves you, or maybe you need the rush... then you've made your choice. What if you say "I'm not quite ready here, but I like you... can we meet again?" If that's not good enough, then you're not being valued much here, that should tell you something. If you met him on a board, check out his online friends, if a sub is close to him, write. If they haven't gotten together, but they're close... why?

I've heard some very strong opinions to the opposite here. You do what you feel, and error with caution. You have to live with it. Don't let anyone beat you down here over your safety. It's YOUR life.

That's not paranoid...that's common sense. And if the caution is stifling the energy... you need to go in knowing you're on your own. Good luck.

< Message edited by danielh -- 6/23/2009 5:53:34 PM >

(in reply to MMagic)

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Post #: 66

RE: Meeting someone offline - 6/25/2009 7:32:18 AM

marysdream

Posts: 126
Joined: 5/31/2008
Status: offline

mmmm where you stay in the beginning of a relationship is entirely up to you! and let someone know where you are going have a safe call..during the meeting time! and the expectations , should not be left up to him..he does not own you! if you are uncomfortable with having sex on the first date make that clear!..
as a note a good D ....you would never have any reservations asking them anything!
good luck
ree

(in reply to pyroaquatic)

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Post #: 67