What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive?

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What do you consider to be the most important qualities... - 6/25/2009 7:16:39 PM

MistressLoving

Posts: 4
Joined: 5/29/2009
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I know what I consider the top qualities, however, I'd like to hear from the subs out there as to what they consider the most important traits of a "good submissive". This applies to those that consider themselves slaves as well.

Post #: 1

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 7:46:25 PM

LyraLaLaurie

Posts: 83
Joined: 4/14/2009
Status: offline

1. Honesty

Yep.

(in reply to MistressLoving)

Post #: 2

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 8:00:24 PM

beargonewild

Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
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Being human and true to ones self.

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(in reply to MistressLoving)

Post #: 3

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 8:08:20 PM

NihilusZero

Posts: 4036
Joined: 9/10/2008
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

Self-awareness
Devotion/Honor
Honesty
Lucidity

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I know they're all insane
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I know that I'm to blame."
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(in reply to beargonewild)

Post #: 4

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 8:08:22 PM

sweetsub1957

Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
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I've done a lot of thinking about this in the past.

* Common decency
* Respect
* Ability to comunicate intelligently
* Honesty
* Love
* Integrity
* Intelligence
* Devotion
* Ambition
* Enthusiasm
* Accountability
* Sincerity
* Obedience
* A Submissive Personality
* A Desire to Please and to Serve
* A Willingness to Surrender

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Post #: 5

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 8:24:34 PM

kdsub

Posts: 12180
Joined: 8/16/2007
Status: offline

Good subs are those that make their partners feel dominate...even if they're not

Butch

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Post #: 6

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 8:33:37 PM

Aileen1968

Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline

I get his sense of humor and he gets mine.

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RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 8:36:28 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Compatibility with the dominant.
Self awareness and honesty are essential to discovering if you are sufficiently compatible.

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(in reply to Aileen1968)

Post #: 8

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 8:41:04 PM

porcelaine

Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

one that comes to the table with her life in order, a sense of self, respect and appreciation for the woman she proclaims to be, and the ability to stand and walk alone if necessary.

porcelaine

_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to MistressLoving)

Post #: 9

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 8:51:09 PM

EmelineRose

Posts: 38
Joined: 5/12/2009
Status: offline

Honesty - with themselves and their Dominant if they have one. Without that you're building a house on sand, destined to crumble.

Of course self honesty is often difficult, painful - and revolutionary. If the Dominant doesn't understand that, if he doesn't know how to react himself or reacts badly, especially egotistically, he will very possibly cause the submissive to create or offer a "pleasing" or PC fake persona. In truth, only the person themself can decide whether they will take down the layers of shields within and reveal who they truly are but a really good Dominant can create an environment and interaction conductive to allowing it to happen. (Of course the same is actually true in reverse). This then becomes what I call a real relationship - between the "real" people. IMHO if you want a deeply intimate, permanent, fulfilling and happy D/s relationship this kind of honesty is the cornerstone from which everything else necessary grows, especially trust.

(in reply to MistressLoving)

Post #: 10

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 8:54:59 PM

Christinestill

Posts: 1199
Joined: 12/4/2008
Status: offline

the ability to choose the right dominant.

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Post #: 11

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 8:56:38 PM

leadership527

Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
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Heh, someone I love. Ideally also willing to submit.

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(in reply to Christinestill)

Post #: 12

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 9:13:52 PM

MistressLoving

Posts: 4
Joined: 5/29/2009
Status: offline

Honesty and trust are key key to the relationship between any sub and domme. For a slave, I would say the same, as well as the ability to serve. By serve, I mean placing the need to please the dominant above all else. I think that is difficult for the most submissives and that is what separates a slave from a sub. To have as your only mission, the desire to please your Mistress/Master, that is single focus and purpose of mind. It is a trait most US based subs/slaves seem to struggle with.

(in reply to leadership527)

Post #: 13

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 9:14:38 PM

cagliostro

Posts: 128
Joined: 12/29/2007
Status: offline

Desire to be "a good submissive." Anything else can be learned. Submission is a skill, so desire to be good at it matters.

(in reply to leadership527)

Post #: 14

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 9:15:31 PM

justme1980

Posts: 169
Joined: 6/20/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: kdsub

Good subs are those that make their partners feel dominate...even if they're not

Butch

not bad, infact that was a damn good answer, Can I borrow that one???

(in reply to kdsub)

Post #: 15

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 9:17:45 PM

AlchemicMelody

Posts: 35
Joined: 6/21/2009
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

Desire to serve, trust, loyalty to the one they serve, and honesty. That's what I think at least.

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"Don't be ashamed of who you love." - Kaya: Japanese singer

(in reply to justme1980)

Post #: 16

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 9:19:15 PM

Fitznicely

Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/18/2006
Status: offline

Complete, unquestioning obedience!

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Proud Owner of Darkmoonkat. Such a good girl!

(in reply to cagliostro)

Post #: 17

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 9:22:50 PM

porcelaine

Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressLoving

To have as your only mission, the desire to please your Mistress/Master, that is single focus and purpose of mind. It is a trait most US based subs/slaves seem to struggle with.

i'm curious, why do you feel that is the case? is this in opposition to those in other cultures?

porcelaine

_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to MistressLoving)

Post #: 18

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 9:28:27 PM

justme1980

Posts: 169
Joined: 6/20/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressLoving

I know what I consider the top qualities, however, I'd like to hear from the subs out there as to what they consider the most important traits of a "good submissive". This applies to those that consider themselves slaves as well.

The slave must truly know themselves and their needs, not to be confused with wants. the slave needs to be able to give them self over 100%
The thought process is quite simple
Am what I am being asked to do going to be harmful To my mind body or soul or legally compromising
if the answer is no, they they need to be willing to do it
And all the basic characteristics that have already been brought up
The slave needs the smarts to pick a suitable MASTER ie if the dominant is a sadist the slave needs to a masochist

(in reply to MistressLoving)

Post #: 19

RE: What do you consider to be the most important quali... - 6/25/2009 9:35:33 PM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

being submissive...similar to the most important quality a dominant posesses...being dominant.

< Message edited by Mercnbeth -- 6/25/2009 9:36:38 PM >

(in reply to MistressLoving)

Post #: 20

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