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RE: Marble eggs - 7/4/2009 11:21:21 AM   
Racquelle


Posts: 600
Joined: 4/21/2008
Status: offline 		Our female hero was lying back in a deep state of dissociative relaxation as her sub, whom we shall call dimwit, was ministering to her darling and ever so lovely pussy.  He had been trying to slip his fist in to no avail.  Then he got the wise idea of grabbing the stone egg and inserting it.  After he monkeyed around a bit and it was quite certain he was no longer pleasing our hero, dimwit brought her round with a panicked whisper of "maybe you can get it out?"

After explaining to our hero just what had taken place, they frantically worked with kitchen tools and sundry other household implements to try to retrieve the item.  I was slippery, pointed end in, and with every failed attempt, our hero's pussy spasmed around the thing, tightening its grip, and it was shoved further and further up against her cervix.

She got dressed, went home, took a warm bath and attempted another extraction to no avail, and went to bed.  She tried to go to work, thinking she would find a way to remove the item later, but after sitting at her desk a couple of hours in increasing agony, placed the fatal call to her trusty gyno's office.  There was the humiliating explanation over the phone to the desk clerk, and then again to the intake nurse, and then again to her gyno.  The doctor did every dutiful and discreet thing she possibly could to remove said item, but every attempt brought yelps of excrutiating pain.

Our hero was referred to a local obstetrical surgeon for an immediate visit.  She drove across town in insane amounts of pain, and now some bleeding and cramping.  The demure chinese man with - thank God - tiny hands, got the whole humiliating story and declared "you boyfriend is very bad man.  You not see him anymore."

Our hero was taken to a procedure room, escorted by the chinese doctor and his very amused nurse.  Our hero climbed into the stirrups once again.  Forceps were tried, various sizes of specula were tried, some sort of vacuum aspiration device was tried, all yeilding yelps and cries and please for mercy.  Chinese doctor looked up and said "If we cannot get out in here, I have to take you downstairs for surgery."  Our hero steeled her nerves, and Chinese doctor stuck in his hand, grasping the monolith, finally, and despite screams of agony and loud blue streaks of explitives that could be heard several suites down the hall.  He wrenched the cursed egg free.

Our hero wept.

The doctor asked permission to take a picture of the egg, blood and tissue covered like a newborn.

After a course of antibiotics and pain killers, she healed well enough.

Dimwit requested return of the egg.  Instead, she sent him Chinese doctor's bill, which was, of course, nigh $1000 and worth every penny.

Our hero would like me to suggest you try the egg on your own rectum first and let us know how that turns out.

< Message edited by Racquelle -- 7/4/2009 11:24:20 AM >

(in reply to sirsholly)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 3:35:10 AM   
ranja


Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
Status: offline 		Yes interesting that people indeed do this fisting thing...anally as well as in the vagina i believe... i saw a plastic fist in my sexshop last time i was there... i can not contemplate how on earth this would ever fit into anybody let alone being moved up and down... my egg however, mmm....

beargonewild:  ... i think my egg is marble but would it matter at all if it was onyx instead?
i do not think it would break because i would warm it up in my hands first...i do not like to insert cold things...turns me rather off...though some people like to do it with ice dildos i understand... also the egg has been very hot on occasion lieing in the sun and cooled down again and was fine... but i do take note about the miniscule cracks, allthough it looks very smooth...i shall study it with my xx magnifying glass
I value all the advise i get Sir...i still think it is very much conservative though...and except for Aileen you are all of the pretty serious opinion it is too dangerous...
as form the boards getting nasty...i have seen it Sir...i am not impressed with that type of behaviour... i take it you did not mean to threaten me?

I also feel that i am being judged to be stupid by some for even considering doing something with my egg...i find this an incredibly unimaginative point of view

I also noted that Holly did not get back to me as to which hole she saw this golfball being removed from.

The egg still sits on my coffee table and i am still thinking about things

(in reply to Racquelle)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 6:39:22 AM   
GYPZYQUEEN


Posts: 730
Joined: 4/14/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fluffypet61

i thought they were a farm thing - put one in the nest and the hen will lay more? use it to replace an egg that you remove?
 




This is why chickens do not wear pants..
GQ

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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 6:42:38 AM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GYPZYQUEEN

quote:

ORIGINAL: fluffypet61

i thought they were a farm thing - put one in the nest and the hen will lay more? use it to replace an egg that you remove?
 

quote:




This is why chickens do not wear pants..
GQ
i thought it was cause their beaks get caught in the zipper.

As to putting an egg in the nest to encourage them to lay their eggs...you can even use one of those colored plastic Easter eggs.

Damn birds are dumb as hell

< Message edited by sirsholly -- 7/5/2009 6:43:32 AM >

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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 6:52:31 AM   
lally2


Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Racquelle

Our female hero was lying back in a deep state of dissociative relaxation as her sub, whom we shall call dimwit, was ministering to her darling and ever so lovely pussy.  He had been trying to slip his fist in to no avail.  Then he got the wise idea of grabbing the stone egg and inserting it.  After he monkeyed around a bit and it was quite certain he was no longer pleasing our hero, dimwit brought her round with a panicked whisper of "maybe you can get it out?"

After explaining to our hero just what had taken place, they frantically worked with kitchen tools and sundry other household implements to try to retrieve the item.  I was slippery, pointed end in, and with every failed attempt, our hero's pussy spasmed around the thing, tightening its grip, and it was shoved further and further up against her cervix.

She got dressed, went home, took a warm bath and attempted another extraction to no avail, and went to bed.  She tried to go to work, thinking she would find a way to remove the item later, but after sitting at her desk a couple of hours in increasing agony, placed the fatal call to her trusty gyno's office.  There was the humiliating explanation over the phone to the desk clerk, and then again to the intake nurse, and then again to her gyno.  The doctor did every dutiful and discreet thing she possibly could to remove said item, but every attempt brought yelps of excrutiating pain.

Our hero was referred to a local obstetrical surgeon for an immediate visit.  She drove across town in insane amounts of pain, and now some bleeding and cramping.  The demure chinese man with - thank God - tiny hands, got the whole humiliating story and declared "you boyfriend is very bad man.  You not see him anymore."

Our hero was taken to a procedure room, escorted by the chinese doctor and his very amused nurse.  Our hero climbed into the stirrups once again.  Forceps were tried, various sizes of specula were tried, some sort of vacuum aspiration device was tried, all yeilding yelps and cries and please for mercy.  Chinese doctor looked up and said "If we cannot get out in here, I have to take you downstairs for surgery."  Our hero steeled her nerves, and Chinese doctor stuck in his hand, grasping the monolith, finally, and despite screams of agony and loud blue streaks of explitives that could be heard several suites down the hall.  He wrenched the cursed egg free.

Our hero wept.

The doctor asked permission to take a picture of the egg, blood and tissue covered like a newborn.

After a course of antibiotics and pain killers, she healed well enough.

Dimwit requested return of the egg.  Instead, she sent him Chinese doctor's bill, which was, of course, nigh $1000 and worth every penny.

Our hero would like me to suggest you try the egg on your own rectum first and let us know how that turns out.


well! - if i was curious about this (and i wasnt) i wouldnt be any more - and thanks to 'Our Hero' for giving me a laugh at her expense.

having babies and laying an egg have two things in common - powerful muscular contractions.  i wonder if a strong orgasm would pop the thing out.

(in reply to Racquelle)
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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 6:54:01 AM   
CatdeMedici


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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 7:13:05 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ranja

Yes interesting that people indeed do this fisting thing...anally as well as in the vagina i believe... i saw a plastic fist in my sexshop last time i was there... i can not contemplate how on earth this would ever fit into anybody let alone being moved up and down... my egg however, mmm....
Fisting can be an awesome thing, it is amazing how much you can fit in those little holes. The fist also has the wonderful advantage of being attached to an arm which can remove it at will. Does you egg have one of those?


beargonewild:  ... i think my egg is marble but would it matter at all if it was onyx instead?
i do not think it would break because i would warm it up in my hands first...i do not like to insert cold things...turns me rather off...though some people like to do it with ice dildos i understand... also the egg has been very hot on occasion lieing in the sun and cooled down again and was fine... but i do take note about the miniscule cracks, allthough it looks very smooth...i shall study it with my xx magnifying glass
I value all the advise i get Sir...i still think it is very much conservative though...and except for Aileen you are all of the pretty serious opinion it is too dangerous...
as form the boards getting nasty...i have seen it Sir...i am not impressed with that type of behaviour... i take it you did not mean to threaten me?

I also feel that i am being judged to be stupid by some for even considering doing something with my egg...i find this an incredibly unimaginative point of view

I don't think anyone is judging you for thinking about it or even asking questions. Now if you go ahead and stick it in there after being warned, they might change their opinions but only time will tell.

I also noted that Holly did not get back to me as to which hole she saw this golfball being removed from.

The egg still sits on my coffee table and i am still thinking about things


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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 7:16:16 AM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

I also noted that Holly did not get back to me as to which hole she saw this golfball being removed from.
tush

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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 8:11:56 AM   
ExKat


Posts: 300
Joined: 8/25/2008
Status: offline 		Actually, I'm not so sure there'd be much risk inserting them into the vagina. The anus is a no-no, obviously. But the vagina does have an end...although you may not be able to retrieve the egg, it's not exactly going to get stuck. Your eggs sound pretty much exactly like Ben-wa balls, which have no string or anything attached to them either and still manage to be a time-honored sex toy for many. Additionally, there are kegel exercise balls without strings or whatnot, and those are specifically weighted. Like, *ahem*, these <http://www.holisticwisdom.com/kegel-eggs-stone.htm> (yes, I know some have strings. But one doesn't).

Unlike a baby, unless you shove that thing waaay up there, the egg will be in your vagina, not your uterus. If you try and stuff 5 or 6 eggs in there, you might run into that problem, but one or two should be pretty safe. Worst comes to worse, you will only need to make a quick trip to your GYN...unlike anal toys, having a vaginal toy rattling around inside you won't be particularly dangerous. I still think that even if it gets stuck, it's going to come out on it's own in good time.

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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 9:39:54 AM   
krikket


Posts: 1183
Joined: 11/17/2004
From: Washington, DC Metro Area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GYPZYQUEEN

quote:

ORIGINAL: fluffypet61

i thought they were a farm thing - put one in the nest and the hen will lay more? use it to replace an egg that you remove?
 




This is why chickens do not wear pants..
GQ


But it's probably why the chicken does cross the road -- to find a better chicken ranch. :)

cheers,
jiminie

_____________________________

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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 9:43:50 AM   
ranja


Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
Status: offline 		Sorry about the messed up quoting thing i do...i can't get it right...i will put blue letters in

quote:

ORIGINAL: thishereboi

quote:

ORIGINAL: ranja

Yes interesting that people indeed do this fisting thing...anally as well as in the vagina i believe... i saw a plastic fist in my sexshop last time i was there... i can not contemplate how on earth this would ever fit into anybody let alone being moved up and down... my egg however, mmm....
Fisting can be an awesome thing, it is amazing how much you can fit in those little holes. The fist also has the wonderful advantage of being attached to an arm which can remove it at will. Does you egg have one of those?
 
Yes about the fisting...the hand is considerably wider than the wrist...this is why steel handcuffs are impossible to take off for most people unless they break their hand. If the vagina starts cramping sometimes a dick can't even get out so it seems to me that a whole hand can not just be retrieved at will without the owner of the hole making the right pushing out muscles work in combination with relaxing at the right time to achieve this otherwise it seems to me awful damage could be done...so i think pushing out a hand...pushing out an egg...would not be so impossible eh?
Have you ever pushed out a hand?
 
as a handle i thought earlier i could put a condom around it as a make shift string...


I also feel that i am being judged to be stupid by some for even considering doing something with my egg...i find this an incredibly unimaginative point of view

I don't think anyone is judging you for thinking about it or even asking questions. Now if you go ahead and stick it in there after being warned, they might change their opinions but only time will tell.
 
Maybe... i suppose they wanna be kept informed then eh?...egg still sits on the coffee table...i am chicken





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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 10:00:11 AM   
angelikaJ


Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ranja


Maybe... i suppose they wanna be kept informed then eh?...egg still sits on the coffee table...i am chicken



After reading Racquelle's account, I think being "chicken" is wise.

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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 10:00:37 AM   
ranja


Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
Status: offline 		Thank you for your thoughts ExKat...we seem to be in the minority though
i was only thinking about one egg... i have only one...
I have had some of these chinese balls too but they were too small did not do anything much for me and i found the string and how it was attached to the balls very unhygenic so I chucked them in the bin.

and thank you Holly

And Lally i wonder too if an orgasm would pop it out
orgasms can definitely have that effect on a buttplug, but that's the wronge hole

oh  angelika...nice as Raquelle's account was...it was not a true story was it?

< Message edited by ranja -- 7/5/2009 10:07:04 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 10:18:41 AM   
ranja


Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

I've seen them require surgery. With a plug-in air freshener. Like, with the plug-in prongs still on it, still full of perfume.
Lemme guess...the explanation for this was they triped, fell backwards and hit the plug-in with their butt 


maybe they just wanted to deodorise the smelly area, jeez the extend some people go to to smell good

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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 10:24:12 AM   
CatdeMedici


Posts: 2257
Joined: 10/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

I also noted that Holly did not get back to me as to which hole she saw this golfball being removed from.
tush


We have much to share, worked ER in New Orleans, also wsas a NO cop specializing in alternative lifestyles--oh yeah, always amazed how some things get UP there, but never amazed when they don't come back out.

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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 10:53:12 AM   
DemonKia


Posts: 5521
Joined: 10/13/2007
From: Chico, Nor-Cali
Status: offline 		FR, after read thru

I live in a fairly small city (~100,000 population) & have hung around nurses & others who work in the local hospital. My understanding is that they get something on the order of a person per week, on average, with something stuck up their butt . . . . . Just to offer some context . . . . .

& who says we don't need no stinking sex-ed in this country? Or that what we've got is adequate?

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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 11:10:26 AM   
DavanKael


Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ranja
DavanKael: there is no problem with spending a bit of money on sex toys... I have plenty...my local sexshop has glass dildos bigger than this egg which is beautiful polished green marble, it is a very sexy egg... i just wonder why they get produced... I mean what is the use of a marble egg? In china they sell beautifully carved ivory dildos that you can easily put in your house as a statue... marble egg... what's the difference?
And I would not want anything at all ever rammed in any orifice... unless i am well and ready thank you very much... rude...
I am not impulsive...it is still sitting on my coffee table...
I wonder why Holly has them...for pure decoration?

In the movie Anatomy of Hell i saw the woman push a stone inside her...it looked incredibly sensual that she 'swallowed' this big smooth black stone with her pussy. She held it in there, showing the man that she could keep it hidden there for as long as she wanted and then she slowly made it slide back out...it looked incredible... I just wonder if anybody here on this kinky? site has any experience with this themself as the movie might have been trickery and special effects... though it looked very convincing...

So far mostly i get is quite boring advice to behave myself ...how drab...
but thanks for your concerns everybody.


Aaw, now the snarkiness is going to bring out some more facts from me.  In addition to my other training, I am a gemologist.  I was also in a relationship with a dude who does beautiful things with stone (And other materials) for close to a year.  So, what I'm saying to you is that I know a lot about rocks. 
What you're calling marble may or may not be marble.  Now, if it's real marble, well, that's a relatively soft stone.  Bad idea.  If it's what most commercial applications market as marble, it's likely serpentine which is more durable. 
Natural stones have a few other issues in addition to hardness.  Fractures are sometimes quite small but on delicate skin, likely to become unpleasantly noticeable.  There are also things called cleavage planes that have nothing to do with boobies.  They're points in a stone where if you hit it just right, the stone is going to break in a big way.  I'd really hate to have a soft/brittle stone cleave inside of me or someone I care about.  The problem of the shape and heft has already been mentioned numerous times and that is a huge consideration. 
I own a stone toy.  I'd like to own others but I know about rock and I'm not going to ram just any ole stone up me or someone else. 
As for calling me rude.  I'll < giggle > in your general direction over that one.  Just trying to save someone from getting hurt and the tax payers (If you don't have insurance) from footing a bill for a dumb-ass move that could have been avoided with a bit of education.  But, you don't want education as your snipe about people giving you drab advice shows: you want wank material. 
For all I care about you, by all means, ram a chunk of rock up yourself (May I suggest something that's rough and splinters easily), just don't ply that foolishness on anyone else. 
  Davan

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RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 12:29:18 PM   
ranja


Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
Status: offline 		DavanKael Thank you for the information about stone...but i think i need much more info than you give me...if you please...you own a stone toy...what stone is that then? and i still wonder what difference it makes to what kind of stone it is...it was suggested that maybe the egg was onyx...i might be slow here, but i do not understand somuch why it makes a difference...i mean i would not use a hammer to get it in...if i were to use it it would be pushed very carefully into a very soft warm orifice...why would it all of a sudden break into pieces inside me?
I take your point about tiny nicks on it causing damage to my delicate skin...and i have looked at it with my magnifying glass in the meantime and it looks and feels extremely smooth.

As for the choice of words "ram a chunk of rock up yourself" sorry Davan but that sounds rude there is no two ways about it...you might not like to hear that you sound rude but you do...

As for wank material...that is indeed always welcom of course but it seems i provide enough of that myself here

DemonKia...up the butt again...i want to know about the other hole

...still doing my research

< Message edited by ranja -- 7/5/2009 12:31:35 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 12:44:40 PM   
frazzle


Posts: 1212
Joined: 6/20/2009
Status: offline 		Ok you want first hand accounts.

Not daft enough to try a marble egg, but did have a Dim insert a ball inside me with no string attached. Having forgotton about it for a while, we then tried to remove it. I have pretty good muscle control and it was next to impossible, lucky for us it wasnt solid and we hoped just trying to get something into one of the holes in it would get it out.

Yes i admit, me laughing my socks off, prob made the exercise take longer. i was ready to go to A&E, he wouldnt let me.

Just coz it goes in, doesnt mean its coming out, without problems. I still see the funny side, he never did.

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Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Marble eggs - 7/5/2009 12:47:04 PM   
DavanKael


Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline 		I meant to be rude by telling you to ram a piece of rock up yourself in my post prior to this.  I'm glad you gleaned my intent there. 
The stone toy I own is made for external use, not what you propose.  In an instertable stone item, I would want length enough to pull it out, stone that I was satisfied was extremely durable/exceptionally smooth, I'd want to know what it was coated with, etc.  I've seen insertables made of gypsum and just shook my head. 
I would suggest that you study the hardness scale of stones then look into the cleavage and individual properties of stones that you may select to optimize safety.  I'd bet some New Age stores would have some stone sex toy options. 
Stones are bashed and worked a lot prior to becoming what you see them as.  Fractures can be internal (If you've ever looked inside of a diamond and noticed what looked like a feather, that's a fracture) and some sort of pressure can make them cleave.  You just don't know is what I am saying; if you're okay with the risk, shove it on up there.  Unless you have an extremely shallow, inflexible vagina, though, I think it's a bad idea.  Also, sometimes they're coated with things to make them shiny.  Those materials can be toxic. 
  Davan


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Profile   Post #: 60
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