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Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 3:55:59 PM

YoungMaster1988

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I seem to have caused a slight uproar in the transsexual/"gender dysphoria" community by sending a user a tongue-in-cheek (probably not the right decision but still) message about how said person should list themselves as TS rather than Female as they are a post-op transsexual.

It just irritated me a bit that after having female in my search preferences a number of transsexual profiles came up (with them revealing themselves as post-op later on in their profile).

Anyway, since my message they've written a blog about me and I've recieved a bit of hate mail off them and their fans (but I'm blocked so I can't respond - seems a little unfair?) and I was just wondering what the general view on this is? Was I right to challenge this post-op transsexual for having their gender down as female or am I being ignorant?

My opinion is this: gender should not be open to discussion or a matter of opinion, if you're born female or male then that is what you are, if you have surgery to change this then you are transsexual, by all means consider yourself female but please don't expect others to. :)

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 3:58:26 PM

GreedyTop

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Atranssexual person IS the gender that they identify as. Just because YOU have a problem with it is no reason for them to identify by the gender they were born into.

Get over yourself.

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:00:35 PM

YoungMaster1988

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I'm not saying that they can't identify themselves as that in real life and in their profile, but for the sake of the search function on this website I think they should change their gender to TS... otherwise you could do away with that option altogether, which is annoying for people looking for born females.

< Message edited by YoungMaster1988 -- 7/4/2009 4:04:07 PM >

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:01:50 PM

brispslave

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No, transsexuals are the gender *THEY WERE BOTH WITH*.

Just because they identify with being male, female, joe camel, or a last year's formula one champion doesn't make it fucking so.

And just for the record, I have no issue with trannies, just with the whole 'I think therefore I am and therefore everyone must suspend reality' bullshit that goes with it.

< Message edited by brispslave -- 7/4/2009 4:02:40 PM >

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:03:51 PM

OsideGirl

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As a post-op TS, she would legally be labeled as female. All of her ID says female. So, you're somehow saying that they're expected to live up to your standard of definition even though the law says otherwise. So, yeah, you're being ignorant, not to mention insensitive and intolerant.

I will agree that pre-op should list as TS and post-op should be up front about their gender reassignment.

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:05:37 PM

Loki45

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quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop
A transsexual person IS the gender that they identify as. Just because YOU have a problem with it is no reason for them to identify by the gender they were born into.

On the one hand, you're absolutely right. However, a couple of short years ago "TS" wasn't even an option on this site. You had to pick one or the other. Finally, they made TS selectable and still people avoid it. It's like they successfully got the site to allow for that option as the first two were too 'limiting' and then they decided not to use the option after all.

It is a bit dishonest, if you think about it. I mean, it's going to come out eventually anyway, why not just be honest? Why risk the fallout from someone finding out after the fact that you're not a genetic female or male? There have been more than a handful of stories in the news about just what can happen when the wrong type of person finds out the woman they were dating wasn't a woman when she was born.

No matter what a person identifies as after surgery, it will never change the fact that they did, in fact, have surgery. Therefore, by definition, they are transexual.

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:06:31 PM

RedMagic1

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Oh goodie, a hate thread. I was afraid we would have an entire day celebrating freedom and independence without one.

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:06:32 PM

YoungMaster1988

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Perhaps the answer is for there to be a post-op transsexual option? That way people looking for females (post-ops) can, and people looking for born females can, with no cross-over or confusion.

(in reply to OsideGirl)

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:08:44 PM

Prinsexx

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quote:

ORIGINAL: YoungMaster1988

I seem to have caused a slight uproar in the transsexual/"gender dysphoria" community by sending a user a tongue-in-cheek (probably not the right decision but still) message about how said person should list themselves as TS rather than Female as they are a post-op transsexual.

It just irritated me a bit that after having female in my search preferences a number of transsexual profiles came up (with them revealing themselves as post-op later on in their profile).

Anyway, since my message they've written a blog about me and I've recieved a bit of hate mail off them and their fans (but I'm blocked so I can't respond - seems a little unfair?) and I was just wondering what the general view on this is? Was I right to challenge this post-op transsexual for having their gender down as female or am I being ignorant?

My opinion is this: gender should not be open to discussion or a matter of opinion, if you're born female or male then that is what you are, if you have surgery to change this then you are transsexual, by all means consider yourself female but please don't expect others to. :)

Oh really? Gosh how awful for you! So very unfair being blocked after making a complete fuck-up eh?

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:08:50 PM

OsideGirl

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Yeah, because God forbid, you should put some effort into finding out more about the person you're speaking to. The whole site should be re-arranged because you don't want to ask questions.

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Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:10:18 PM

Loki45

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Yeah, because God forbid, you should put some effort into finding out more about the person you're speaking to. The whole site should be re-arranged because you don't want to ask questions.

The problem with this stance, is that the site *was* changed. For a long time, it only had female and male as options. Now it has TS options available but they aren't being used.

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:10:21 PM

PsyVamp

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Well, if you have a problem with transsexuals...why not just put "no transsexuals" in your profile. A LOT of us don't have that problem. Your kink is not My kink and so on ....
Not only that...but post op, hey- the deed is done and they ARE their preferred gender.

Good luck in your search.

edited to add: This was a fast reply and not necessary to the last poster.

< Message edited by PsyVamp -- 7/4/2009 4:12:08 PM >

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:10:36 PM

YoungMaster1988

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Loki that's exactly what I wanted to say, thankyou for putting it so eloquently.

Redmagic1 - how is this a hate thread?

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:12:32 PM

cheeryredhead

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Are there really THAT many that it's become a issue? seriously this sounds like your really lazy in your search.

(in reply to PsyVamp)

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:14:24 PM

OsideGirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Loki45

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Yeah, because God forbid, you should put some effort into finding out more about the person you're speaking to. The whole site should be re-arranged because you don't want to ask questions.

The problem with this stance, is that the site *was* changed. For a long time, it only had female and male as options. Now it has TS options available but they aren't being used.

It's their option whether they use it or not. Even if they added a post-op option, it STILL probably wouldn't be used. The site has no way to enforce it and most likely doesn't have the desire to. So, rather than expecting someone else to do your due diligence for you, take some responsibility and ask questions when speaking to a possible partner.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:14:46 PM

Loki45

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quote:

ORIGINAL: YoungMaster1988

Loki that's exactly what I wanted to say, thankyou for putting it so eloquently.

Redmagic1 - how is this a hate thread?

It's a hate thread, or seen as one because of how you worded your original post. It very easily puts people on the defensive when you 'appear' to be telling them what to do and how to do it.

My stance is that I personally don't give a fuck, largely because I don't come here to find 'true love.' I'm here to fuck around on the forums, and occasionally look at profiles with no actual intent on bedding anyone. Think of it like window shopping. I have no intention of going into the store, but I'll glance at the window display as I walk by.

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"'Till the roof comes off, 'till the lights go out
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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:16:26 PM

SavageFaerie

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Im with Greedy...how they choose to live and be are who they are. Especially if their valid Id show the gender they are living.

Post op TG option....that like asking for a option for mostly sub switch...not gonna happen.

Plus how it it any different than all the male wankers that pose as female. Should there be a option for wankers too?

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:18:40 PM

RedMagic1

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Because you are holding your ignorance as fact, and many years of accumulated medical knowledge as BS.

1. A "transexual" is someone who desires to live as a member of the other gender, and undergo surgery to do so. It would be a lie for a post-op male or female to label their profile as TS, unless they want to change back.

2. A post-op male or female is considered to be male or female by both medical and governmental authorities.

3. Who the hell are you to tell someone (I'm guessing a woman) that she can't call herself a woman, even though her doctor does, her insurance company does, and her Census Bureau does?

You did not start a thread saying, "I don't understand something, could someone explain this?" You were trolling for support to preserve the ignorance you used to attack someone for doing something legal and ethical -- listing herself correctly on her profile.

As GreedyTop said, get over yourself.
Edited to add: the definition of transexual in (1) is not mine. It's in the International Classification of Diseases and Related Problems.

< Message edited by RedMagic1 -- 7/4/2009 4:20:20 PM >

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

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Post #: 18

RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:19:13 PM

Loki45

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
It's their option whether they use it or not. Even if they added a post-op option, it STILL probably wouldn't be used. The site has no way to enforce it and most likely doesn't have the desire to. So, rather than expecting someone else to do your due diligence for you, take some responsibility and ask questions when speaking to a possible partner.

It is indeed their option. But it goes beyond simple 'due dilligence,' when you're on a profile site.

When I go up to a girl in a bar, I am expected to chat her up to learn about her. At some point before 'sealing the deal' it is incumbent upon her to let me know if there has been a 'plumbing change' beforehand in case I have a problem with it. It's incumbent on her to say instead of on me to ask because of the inherent dangers in a guy simply saying "Did you used to be a dude?" Real conversation killer, that question.

By the same token, profiles are like an ad. You're putting yourself out there, for good or bad. If you get an e-mail from a guy and the two of you hit it off.....at some point, he's going to need to know if you were born the way he thinks you are or not. Take that one step further....perhaps he'd never have e-mailed you had he known (maybe that's just his issue). So, by him seeing 'female' in the profile with no other identifiers.....how's he to know?

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"'Till the roof comes off, 'till the lights go out
'Till my legs give out, can't shut my mouth."

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RE: Transsexual = Female? - 7/4/2009 4:20:03 PM

Prinsexx

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And I just said that intelligence was a rare commodity?

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