Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

why tg women not welcome


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> why tg women not welcome Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 12:07:19 PM   
danielle26001


Posts: 11
Joined: 6/23/2009
Status: offline 		after reading many profiles find it amazing that tg women not welcome here. Go into chat not as much as a hello to me since am a tg woman while women get all attention. Why is this possible? say everyone welcome here see very different on my end once again why?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 12:11:30 PM   
subtlebutterfly


Posts: 2230
Joined: 6/15/2008
From: Not your hood
Status: offline 		oh boy not again

_____________________________

~Ms. Awesomeness to YOU!~

(in reply to danielle26001)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 12:14:47 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		If TG women weren't welcome here, it wouldn't be one of the available descriptions.  You're not forced to stay off of the site by any means.  By the same token, you can't force people to interact with you.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to subtlebutterfly)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 12:16:44 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline 		First, try the Search feature.  You'll find many past threads on this topic.
 
Second, TG women are welcome here.  There are several long-standing members who are well-spoken and respected contributors to the boards.
 
Third, what you have run into in profiles and chats is personal preference.  There are many who prefer a genetic woman as a partner and do not wish to entertain inquiries from anyone who was not born with a XX chromosome.  That is their right.  Deal with it by moving on to the next person/profile and be glad they were upfront about their desires instead of wasting your time.  Whining about it on the boards will not win you any friends or supporters.

_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to subtlebutterfly)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 12:20:39 PM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		Welcome to the forums.  

I think if you are finding that you are not getting much action on the chat rooms here, it is simply due to the mix of the participants.  Mostly males looking for bio females in the chat rooms and not as many that might be interested in a TG person.

TS/TG/TV/CD, etc folk have a smaller pool of people interested in us.  It would be great if we got interest equal to that of biological females or males, but many people just don't work that way. 

There is a difference, we should celebrate it!  But we should also realize that not everyone is gonna be into our uniqueness.


_____________________________

I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to danielle26001)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 12:43:31 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		I have known men who would, no way, no how, at no time, be with a redhead... redheads were crazy(!) I also met men who thought my skinny bones would wound them if they had sex with me.  There are many who will not accept me, be nice to me and treat me with dignity because of my age and my illness... and add that I live in a mobile home and omg... Jerry Springer dommette!

I am not meaning to belittle your pain!  I know it can be tough out there and some are not kind and you do have some issues that other's may not see in their own life, but isn't one rejection and pain as bad as any other?  Some will be ignorant, some will simply not be interested because of what they want and some will refuse to talk or greet someone.  I have seen all genders and each side of the slash complain about chat rooms not being welcoming and great for the popular regulars and no one else.  It isn't just you. When I spent a lot of time in chats, I saw this and greeted every person I realistically could.  A greeting doesn't mean anything but that I may be friendly, but all of a sudden all types of people took my greeting as a 'come on over and visit me and yes... I just wanna love you and do you'.

I would suggest not taking it personally and finding those who are more welcoming for your own sake.  It is much better to seek the good than hurt from the bad or ignorance or whatever it is.

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to OttersSwim)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 3:07:59 PM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline 		Please don't take this personally, but just how long have you been transgendered?

I'm asking because it's such a popular prejudice that accepting that some people are going to be prejudiced against me came pretty much after the acceptance that I, like you, am a transgendered female. We've all been conditioned to accept the binary male-female pattern in society which makes it so hard to gain acceptance initially of yourself but also from other people when you don't fit either of the two stereotypes shared by everyone else.

You're asking people to understand and accept something which is something completely alien and foreign to them, something which they themselves could never imagine experiencing, and though there are some who try, others who give you the benefit of the doubt, there are others who just refuse to even try and who perceive you as trying to be someone you're not.

I mean let's face it, there's some people out there who have difficulty in coping with being in the gender they were born in let alone the opposite gender.

Not that this makes us a special case over the fat people, lesbians, gays, people on welfare, homeless people, coloured people, the mentally ill, and others who routinely face prejudice and discrimination in their lives.

The prejudice is always going to be there. But the choice whether you're going to let it bring you down and make your life a misery, or find a way of coping with it and even overcoming it, well this is about the only choice you're able to make as someone who is transgendered.

_____________________________

CM's Resident Lyricist
also Facebook
http://stella.baker.tripod.com/
50NZpoints
Q2
Simply Q

(in reply to danielle26001)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 3:31:32 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		You are welcome here, both on the forums and on the profile side. What you are mistaking for being unwelcome is simply encountering people's desires. You don't see me complaining that none of the hot young sub women are interested in an old fart like me, its just the way things are (now if only my Lotto numbers would come up things might change....rewrite my profile: Stinking rich old fart with bad heart seeks trophy sub....think I'd get more hits), and complaining about it won't change it. Its a simple fact of life that many men (and at least some lesbians, I say some because I simply have no idea of the numbers involved) are uninterested in a non-biological female. It is, live with it.

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 3:44:32 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Stella, a quick word, if you please.

I'm curious about something from your own personal opinion.

Where do you see prejudice end and personal preference in relationships begin?

Undoubtedly, there are prejudices in society, but does it still remain a prejudice if it is something someone can not accept in a dynamic?  Does middle ground come in somewhere along the way?  OK, I'm explaining very poorly.  Let Me try something else.

If, for example, TG women weren't welcome on the site, or at a female only event, something of that nature, I would see it as a prejudice.  Go a step further.  TG women are welcome at a female only event, but some chose to attempt to get to know that female and others don't.  Is that a prejudice?  What about folks who are friendly at gatherings, but not interested in outside friendships?  Carry that to there's a spark in that friendship, but not everyone would carry that spark to a dynamic or romantic relationship. 

I know I'm phrasing what I'm trying to say poorly, but where do you see the line between the various interactions among people?




ETA - It still seems to be coming off badly.  I don't want it to sound like I'm attacking views.  I'm wondering about your personal opinion.


< Message edited by LadyPact -- 7/11/2009 3:45:47 PM >

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 3:54:45 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		HeyLP, I know you addressed your question to Stella, but I will chime in (like I can ever resist poking my nose in where it wasn't asked for eh?). If somebody does not want a romantic/physical relationship with a TG person because they are TG, that I would say is preference. If somebody will not befriend a TG person because they are TG, then that would be prejudice.

P.S. A female only event is a sign of prejudice to begin with, just sayin'....


_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 4:04:30 PM   
beargonewild


Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: danielle26001

after reading many profiles find it amazing that tg women not welcome here. Go into chat not as much as a hello to me since am a tg woman while women get all attention. Why is this possible? say everyone welcome here see very different on my end once again why?


That's opposite to what I've seen. Sometimes being a new person to the forums it just takes a bit of time for others to know you as a person and vice versa. What I found is you put a little effort out to others and they will give that back.


_____________________________

Do Not Rile da Chosen Bear

Promiscuous boy you already know
That I’m all yours what you waiting for?

Resident MANWHORE ~1000 Bear pts~

10 NZ points
Whips~n~Cuffs

(in reply to danielle26001)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 4:14:02 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		Just because people state in their profile they do not want to date or fuck or do what ever, they're looking to do with a TG does not mean the site itself as a policy does not welcome TG. There's a difference and it'd be a good idea to distinguish the two.


Chat rooms are a gamble, Some people get talked to and others don't. They have a particular flow, and some are chattier and friendlier, and some are not. Some people know each other  in real life and are friends with clusters of other users, and tend to be less friendly to people not in their social click.  If they're that un friendly and inhospitable, go to another chat room and try again, or just consider them all a crap shoot better stayed away from, unless they're specifically for TG or have shown to be friendly.

(in reply to beargonewild)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 4:19:59 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

HeyLP, I know you addressed your question to Stella, but I will chime in (like I can ever resist poking my nose in where it wasn't asked for eh?). If somebody does not want a romantic/physical relationship with a TG person because they are TG, that I would say is preference. If somebody will not befriend a TG person because they are TG, then that would be prejudice.

P.S. A female only event is a sign of prejudice to begin with, just sayin'....



LOL.  I'd never expect it of you.  It keeps the conversation interesting.

I appreciate your input on where the line is in the different type of relationships.

As to the female only event, that's kind of odd.  I know you're a good distance from Me, but don't you guys have such stuff in Canada?  Nothing like a Madam's Brunch or a Ladies Tea?  Do you have SIG (special interest groups) that are geared only toward Dominants, submissives, TNG, or any other type?


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 4:29:02 PM   
beargonewild


Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

Just because people state in their profile they do not want to date or fuck or do what ever, they're looking to do with a TG does not mean the site itself as a policy does not welcome TG. There's a difference and it'd be a good idea to distinguish the two.


Chat rooms are a gamble, Some people get talked to and others don't. They have a particular flow, and some are chattier and friendlier, and some are not. Some people know each other  in real life and are friends with clusters of other users, and tend to be less friendly to people not in their social click.  If they're that un friendly and inhospitable, go to another chat room and try again, or just consider them all a crap shoot better stayed away from, unless they're specifically for TG or have shown to be friendly.



Just do not assume that every single person going into a chat room is looking to hook up for the sake of sex. A little humanity and offer of friendship goes a hell of a long way. Just saying yanno.


_____________________________

Do Not Rile da Chosen Bear

Promiscuous boy you already know
That I’m all yours what you waiting for?

Resident MANWHORE ~1000 Bear pts~

10 NZ points
Whips~n~Cuffs

(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 5:01:17 PM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Where do you see prejudice end and personal preference in relationships begin?



When there's some degree of awareness of the possibility of a relationship forming between two people, or even a simple friendship.

You decide who comes into your life or stays out on the basis of your preferences.

You decide whether someone is acceptable or not on the basis of your prejudices.

_____________________________

CM's Resident Lyricist
also Facebook
http://stella.baker.tripod.com/
50NZpoints
Q2
Simply Q

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 5:16:59 PM   
Politesub53


Posts: 14862
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: stella41b


You decide who comes into your life or stays out on the basis of your preferences.

You decide whether someone is acceptable or not on the basis of your prejudices.


Even if you`re right, it doesnt follow that someone who prefers not to have a relationship with a TG is prejudiced.

(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 5:18:22 PM   
MistressWolfen


Posts: 578
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline 		nicely stated stella41b

_____________________________

Quoth the raven

(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 5:38:00 PM   
GYPZYQUEEN


Posts: 730
Joined: 4/14/2009
Status: offline 		OP:
 
Everyone is welcome here..
It took me being on here about 2 months and making about 300 posts before ppl got to know me..about me..how I ticked..what I was like.

I read many profiles too( hav etalked to about 600 ppl) and could have thought wow.."subs don't want a nurturing..loving  mommy-DOMME"( due to some communications)...but it was not that...there were some who did and some who did not..

I could have thought ..
"gee D men sure don't like D women.( due to some communications) but it was not that..some simply have opinions about such...

.I could have thought ..
"hay they don't like fat ppl on here".( due to getting a message about being a tub of lard and more)
/I could have run away when I got the message that I was a ni99er and should wash this guys floor..

It is all about personality...communicating..standing in
YOUR TRUTH of who you are...and going FWD with ease.
and not taking things personally/
.
It is about finding  friendships.laughter and..lessons and wisdoms in debates..and weeding out the shit..
and sometimes..wow...finding a partner after searching in earnest.

As you post and  interact more Danielle you will get to know us and know you are as welcome as anyone.

GQ

< Message edited by GYPZYQUEEN -- 7/11/2009 5:39:55 PM >

(in reply to MistressWolfen)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 5:49:15 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		I never did.  I know people chat for many differnt reasons, and I would never assume it was for x y or z, And I still stand by what I said about chat rooms being a gamble. Some are friendlier than others, and some are not so friendly, and if we, as chatters find the rooms in hospitable, or less friendly than we like, find another room and see if this room was friendlier, or decide if chat rooms are where we want to hang out if none of the chat experiences have been satisfying..


Where do you get I assume anything about chat rooms and those going into chat rooms. Unless of course you presumed my statement that people who put profiles on here and do not want to do x y or z,  with TG's or what ever they want to do on here are the same as the websites policy on TG to be some kind of assumption that any one in chat comes to chat for sex, which isn't indicative at all of why people come to chat. Just that personal users who post profiles that say no TG's are not the owner and founder of the websites policy on TG's.


Edited cause I mis spelled some stuff.
quote:

ORIGINAL: beargonewild


Just do not assume that every single person going into a chat room is looking to hook up for the sake of sex. A little humanity and offer of friendship goes a hell of a long way. Just saying yanno.



< Message edited by Toppingfrmbottom -- 7/11/2009 5:54:23 PM >

(in reply to beargonewild)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: why tg women not welcome - 7/11/2009 5:56:13 PM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Politesub53

quote:

ORIGINAL: stella41b


You decide who comes into your life or stays out on the basis of your preferences.

You decide whether someone is acceptable or not on the basis of your prejudices.


Even if you`re right, it doesnt follow that someone who prefers not to have a relationship with a TG is prejudiced.


That is so very true.

Just for further clarification and to provide a little further insight the sort of prejudice I'm talking about here is the view that someone is unacceptable as a fellow human being, which is usually based on the assumption that they are deluded, mentally ill or trying to be someone who they're not without knowing that person.

Therefore someone who isn't aware of TG issues or who hasn't had contact with someone who is TG also isn't prejudiced. They just don't understand.

_____________________________

CM's Resident Lyricist
also Facebook
http://stella.baker.tripod.com/
50NZpoints
Q2
Simply Q

(in reply to Politesub53)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> why tg women not welcome Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094